Chapter 64 - The Miracle Of Life
Six Months Later. FPOV
“I still don’t understand why my dad wants me to be here,” I tell B and shift around in the very uncomfortable plastic chair. I wouldn’t be so bitchy if it wasn’t two in the morning, and I wasn’t interrupted in the middle of very great sex. I was wearing the strap-on, and B was wearing her cowgirl hat and riding me for all she was worth. You have no idea how dead sexy she looks in that hat, especially when she’s riding me. Anyway, about halfway through it, the phone starts ringing. I wanna ignore it, but Buffy can’t let the phone ring because it could’ve been slayer related. So I answered, and it was my dad on the other line saying that Brittany went into labor and for whatever reason he wants me at the hospital to witness this miracle of life.
“Faith, your little brother or sister is going to be born why wouldn’t he want you here?” I shrug my shoulders and shift on the chair again. I know I’m acting like a little spoiled kid, but I don’t care. It’s too fuckin early for this shit. “I know that you haven’t been able to spend as much time with your dad but he loves you, and this is a very important moment in his life and he wants to share it with you.” She reaches over and holds onto my hand. I guess she’s right. My dad didn’t have to call me, but he did. I’m just bitchy ‘cause it’s early, and I’m still a little worked up, and we’ve been here for three hours. I went in and talked to Brittany once just to see how she was doing, but she wants to be alone.
A lot of stuff has happened in the last six months, so I might as well take this time to get you all caught up since it takes most first time moms thirteen hours to push their kid out. In February Joey turned one. We had a birthday party for him at the house. It was mostly just Buffy’s friends and their kids. Joey is too young to understand the concept of birthdays, but the cake was wicked good and that’s all that matters. I don’t wanna sound like an ass, but in all honesty there really is no point to celebrating the first birthday. Most of the kids end up crying because all eyes are on them, and it makes them uncomfortable. They don’t get the concept of opening presents, and they have trouble doing it on their own. So the only real reason to throw a one year old a birthday party is to gorge on cake and not have to feel guilty about it.
February was also the month Giles bought a large apartment complex that we turned into a ‘slayer headquarters’. It’s a five story building and three bottom floors have been turned into training rooms, and storage rooms for the weapons and training stuff. The two top floors are the living quarters for the girls. It’s a small group, only four, and they’re our guinea pigs. We’re not sure how this is going to turn out, or what type of training plans are going to work better then others, so we’re testing everything out on them. When we have a better routine down then we’ll get a few more, but no more then ten. If we get groups bigger then ten then we won’t have enough time to help the girls out individually, and being able to do that is important.
And this works out for them too because they’re getting school credit for it. The girls’ parents are being told it’s an internship, and so are the states of Ohio and Nevada. And since me and Buffy aren’t certified teachers, Sky and Willow have moved in not far from us. Buffy got so excited because her best friend is finally living close to her again. Willow is just as excited, and me and Sky are neutral. Don’t get me wrong I like Red, she’s a cool girl but we’re not exactly buddy-buddy. So I was happy for Buffy, but other then that I couldn’t have cared less. They’re finally talking about having kids. I guess Buffy filled Willow in on how much Sky babbled about wanting some but not knowing if Willow wanted any or not. So who knows, maybe in the near future we’ll be in this hospital waiting for Sky to deliver her and Willow’s.
Anyway, the training program is goin way better then I thought it would. I love teaching the girls new techniques, and my style is very different from what they’re being taught at the school. At the school they’re learning basically the bare minimum of slaying demons and vampires. I’m teaching them how to get the job done and looking good doing it. Come on, there’s slaying, and then there’s slaying in style. You gotta look cool takin out the vamps and the demons or there’s barely a point. And the forest here has a very large variety of demons and this town has plenty of vampires to give the girls a lot of hands on experience that they normally wouldn’t experience until their junior year of high school.
Yep, that’s right, I requested freshmen, and sophomore girls only. When I was there it seemed like the freshmen and sophomores have the hardest time adjusting to the school, and emotionally it’s hard. The girls seem to be doing great though, and I’m available twenty-four seven if they need to talk. I even bought another cell phone and they’re the only ones with the number for it. If that’s not dedication then I don’t know what is. But they’re gone now. The school year ended in the beginning of June, so they’re home with their parents until September. I will admit, only to you, that I do miss ‘em. They saved my ass a couple of times, and that’s the kind of thing that will bring people closer together.
Anyway, earlier this month Mattie had his birthday. That’s right, my boy is now eleven years old, and this August he’s going to be starting sixth grade. This is his last year of elementary school. After this he’ll be in junior high, and after two years of that he’ll be in high school. Just the thought of that is pretty amazing, and scary at the same time. He’s gonna be a teenager in three years. He’s gonna be hormonal, and temperamental, and thinking about nothing but girls, and how to get in their pants. He’s growing up, and it’s scary. I want to think of him as my little boy, but he’s not so little anymore. I have a feeling that the goodbye kisses before he rushes off to school are nearing an end.
Buffy’s been taking it easy with the slayer. She had a little incident that kinda spooked her. She went slaying by herself to work off some tension ‘cause Addy was acting up again. A vamp overpowered her and stabbed her in the stomach with her own stake. I guess this shit has happened before sometime in Sunnydale, I guess when I was locked up. She slowly coming to terms with the reality of just because there are thousands of slayers out there it doesn’t mean that slaying is less dangerous, it just means we have more backup if we need it. So now whenever she slays she doesn’t go alone.
Back in May me and Buffy celebrated our second wedding anniversary. And just like the one before it we spent the weekend in Vegas. We wanted to do something different, maybe go the Florida or something and enjoy the beach, but we decided not to because if we’re going to go that far away it’s going to be longer then a weekend, and we didn’t want to stay away too long because of the slayers the needed training. So next year we’re going to have Giles send out Kennedy to train with the girls for a week while Buffy and I enjoy ourselves on some sandy beach, soaking up the sun and fucking the night away. Well, we did that last part in Vegas, but there was no sandy beach, or sun soaking.
“Thinking about the anniversary again?” Buffy whispers into my ear and I nod my head a little bit. I know it was two months ago but I think about it every once in a while, and I guess I get a little smirk on my face whenever I do. The funny thing about the anniversary is it started out in Vegas and we were having a great time, but it ended when I had to go to the hospital because I dislocated my hip. We bought some new toys on our way to the hotel, and I got a little…over enthusiastic about it. It didn’t hurt that bad and when the doctor put it back in place I was fine, it only took two days to heal. It wasn’t all my fault, it was mostly the angle that caused my hip to pop out of its socket. And you are so not getting any more details.
“That’s the last time we ever drink tequila before we have sex,” I whisper back and it makes her giggle a little bit. She thinks it’s funny now but at the time she was freaking out. Anyway, lets stop talking about that little incident, it’s not one of my proudest moments. Some not so good stuff happened a couple months ago. Xander and his wife got divorced. He wasn’t even going to tell us. We only found out when Giles let it slip. The only reason Giles knew is because Xander needed to borrow some money for the down payment on a new house. This happened back in April and the custody battle for Miranda is still going on. They can’t agree on anything when it comes to Miranda. They both want her full time and neither of them are backing down.
I talked to Xander just last week, and he’s doing fine. I guess him and Katie haven’t gotten along for a long time, and all they did was fight, and even with marriage counseling they couldn’t work it out. He sounded…relieved on the phone the first time I talked to him after they split up. The only thing he was really worried about was Miranda. I don’t meant to sound like Buffy, but when I think about how much Xander loves his little girl I know exactly why we slay, why we’ll never stop fighting evil. It makes all the deaths, and all the pain seem less pointless. Yeah, I know, I totally sound like Buffy right now. I can’t help it. No one can sound tough, and badass when they’re talking about Xander and his daughter.
“Are you Faith Lehane?” someone asks and it snaps me outta my little zone out. I look up at the nurse and nod my head a little. Why is she asking for me? Did something go wrong? Did my dad finally realize that he had a kid with someone younger then his own daughter and have a heart attack or something? “Your father wants to see you.” I stand up and B is right at my side. The nurse smiles a little but then it goes away. “I’m sorry ma’am, but he said only Faith can come back.” Hmm, I wonder why he said that? I don’t question her on it, though. I just give B a little kiss on the lips and tell her I won’t be too long. But then she tells me to take my time, and that she’s going to go to the cafeteria and get something to eat.
The nurse leads me through the large swinging doors and down the long hallway. We stop at the very end, she motions towards the door on the right, and then she walks off. Ok, that was a little weird, are they supposed to walk off like that? I guess it doesn’t matter. I slowly open the door and walk in. The lights are dimmed and it takes a few seconds for my eyes to adjust from the blinding florescent lighting out in the hallway. The first thing I see is Brittany lying in the hospital bed, and she’s asleep. Her hair is messy, and a little crusty looking from the dried sweat. The second thing I notice is Brittany’s stomach, which is a lot smaller then it was the last time I saw her. So she had her kid in a little under four hours? That has gotta be a record for a first time mother.
The third thing I see is my dad sitting a chair in the far corner of the room with the table lamp turned on. The baby is cradled in his arms, wrapped in a big light green blanket, and he’s smiling a very soft smile. The only time I ever see him smile like that is when he smiles at me. The weird thing is I don’t feel jealous. I don’t feel panicked that my dad is going to love that kid more then me. I don’t feel worried that he’s going to cut me out of his life and just be with his new family. I thought I would feel all those things, but I don’t. Looking at him and seeing him so happy, it makes me feel calm. I take a couple of steps towards him and he looks up. I guess he didn’t hear me before. His smile gets even bigger, and it makes me smile too.
“Get over here,” he whispers so he won’t wake up the new mom. “Meet your little sister.” A little sister? I have a little sister? I walk over to him, and sit down on the arm of the chair. I look down at the little bundle in his arms and she’s asleep too. I guess the delivery wiped both of ‘em out. “She was born about an hour ago, but they had to take her away because she wasn’t breathing.” That must’ve been so scary. “The doctor said she’s gonna be fine. I guess it was just too tight of a squeeze.” That makes me laugh, but I force myself to shut up ‘cause I really don’t want to be on the receiving end of Brittany’s wrath if she wakes up. “Her name’s Grace.” I was hoping he wouldn’t name her something like that. But whatta gonna do? “Wanna hold her?”
“It’s weird you feel like you have to ask,” I say with a little smile. He very carefully hands me my little sister. She squirms around a little bit but she doesn’t wake up. Holding a newborn is such a weird experience. Weird, but good. It’s kind of hard to describe. I look down at her, and even though she’s only about an hour old she’s really cute. Most newborns look weird because their skulls are kind of mushy to make the trip out of the birth canal possible. But she’s cute. She has a little bit of hair but it’s hard to tell what color it is in this soft lighting. I think it’s brown, but it could just look darker. I’ll have to ask my dad later. I don’t want to talk. I feel like if I talk right now I’ll kill this little moment I’m having.
I slowly lean down a little to give her a kiss on the forehead. Her skin is so soft, and she has that infant smell. I know that sounds crazy, but the smell of a newborn baby is…really hard to describe because it’s unique. But it’s a really good smell, and smelling Grace is reminding me of what it was like to hold my kids when they were first born. I look over at my dad when I feel his arm on my back. He nods his head to the side a little and I know what he wants. I get up and then sit down across his lap. I lean against his chest and give him a little kiss on the cheek. This kid has no idea how lucky she is to have a dad like him. He’ll never put her down, or make her feel stupid about her opinions on everything. He’ll never let her think that she can’t be anything in the world when she grows up.
“She’s beautiful, isn’t she?” he asks in a very soft whisper. I nod my head and smile a little bit. I’m not smiling because of the baby, I’m smiling because of a memory that’s running through my head now. It’s of the last time I sat in my dad’s lap like this before he was arrested. We were in the living room, on his recliner, and he was reading me a bed time story. It was Snow White, and it was the part when the magic mirror tells the wicked queen that Snow White is the fairest in the land. My dad stopped reading and gave me a kiss on my cheek and said that it’s obvious the book was written before I was born otherwise it would say that I’m the fairest of them all because I’m the most beautiful girl in the world. And the little runt in my arms is my competition for that title. Well, I guess we can share it because she is really cute.
“Yeah she is,” I whisper, and snuggle into my dad a little more. I don’t care if I’m an adult, sometimes a girl just needs to be held by her dad no matter how old she is. I guess he understands because his grip tightens just a little. I gently run the tip of my finger next to Grace’s mouth and her cheek starts to twitch. It’s a natural instinct that little babies have. The only reason I’m doing it is because when their mouth and cheeks twitch like this it looks like they’re trying to smile. If this little girl takes after her mom then she’s going to have a very pretty smile when she gets older. I kinda can’t wait to see it.
“She looks like you when you were born,” my dad whispers and rests his chin on the top of my head. He’s really tall and I’m kinda short so even with his chin on top of my head he can still look down at the little girl in my arms. “‘Cept she has Brittany’s nose. Her eyes’re blue, but so were yours when you little. They didn’t start to turn brown until you were a year old.” We stop talking, and we just look down at the little life that I’m holding. It’s so different from when I held my own kids. This is my little sister, and we’re going to get into so much trouble together.
BPOV
I watch Faith walk through the big swinging doors and I sigh a little. I told her I’d go to the cafeteria because I didn’t want her to make a big deal about me not being able to go back with her. It isn’t a big deal. Her dad wants this to be a family moment and I understand. When my kids were bone I wanted it to just be us for a little while before we shared then with everyone else. So I head towards the elevator because I’m not going to walk down three flights of stairs just to eat crappy hospital food. What is it about the food in hospitals and in schools that is so gross? I don’t understand it. Why am I even worrying about it? It’s not like it matters.
I remember when I first met my little sister. I didn’t get to see her in the hospital. For some reason my parents didn’t want that. The first time I saw her was when they walked through our front door. My mom was holding this little bundle in her arms and it was moving. Then she knelt down and let me look at my little sister. And just for the record my mom and dad did not leave a six-year-old at home by herself. One of our neighbors was watching me but that part got left out when Willow went inside my mom and had that hold head trip with the three mes. Anyway she knelt down and let me see Dawn and I remember thinking she looked a little weird. All newborns look weird. But then I held her and it’s like I knew that I’d have to look out for her, that not even our mom or dad could fully protect her.
That sounds really stupid though. I don’t know why, it just does. I guess because my mom and dad couldn’t fully protect her. I’m not just talking about the swan dive I took off the tower. I’m talking about from all the vampires and demons and other supernatural evils. Even natural ones. No parent can protect their daughter from her first heart break. Come to think of it neither can their big sister. Then again Dawn’s first heart break that I can remember was because of a spell so I didn’t really stand much of a chance. Sometimes I can’t help but think that maybe if I had been around for Dawn to talk to then she wouldn’t have lied about the paternity of her boys. Maybe she would have talked to me about it and I could have convinced her to be honest with Kyle about it.
It’s a bittersweet pill to swallow because on one hand what Dawn did is horrible. She cheated on someone who loved her more then anything else in the world. She was impregnated by someone else and she lied to everyone about it. What she did is unforgivable in Kyle’s eyes. She hasn’t heard from him since he took off the day he found out about the true father of the babies. But at the same time I’m a little glad she did sleep with Michael because now she has two sweet, adorable little boys. I babysit for her every Monday because the daycare they’re going to is very expensive, and she can only afford to put them in it for four days a week. What I’m trying to get at is I’m glad Dawn had them because they’re the best thing that could have happened to her, in my opinion at least.
Even though I’m happy for her I’m a little sad for her at the same time. The boys are only a year old so she doesn’t have any free times on her hands, and I can tell she’s lonely. And not the type of lonely that a daily visit from your sister can cure. She won’t admit it because she thinks if she does she’ll look weak, but she wants someone there to hold her at night. And holding is the farthest I’m willing to let my mind wander to. I want my sister to be happy in every way possible but that doesn’t mean I have to think of all the different ways. Ok, I’m going to stop thinking about this now because it’s nearing the realm of disturbing. All I’m trying to say is I want my sister to be happy, and right now she isn’t as happy as she can be. I think if she found a great guy who she can fall in love with and who will love her back and raise her kids with her as if they were his own, then she’d be truly happy.
As I walk down the hallway towards the cafeteria I pass a payphone, and I think about calling and checking on the kids. I guess it’s just a mother’s instinct to want to know what their children are doing at all times. But I really don’t think Willow and Sky would appreciate being woken up at three in the morning just so I can ask how the kids are doing. I know it probably could have waited until the weekend, but Faith and I wanted the house to ourselves. So we asked Willow and Sky if the kids could have a sleep over at their place. The kids love staying over at aunt Willow’s house because she lets them stay up late and eat whatever they want. Hopefully she sent them to bed at a reasonable time because Matthew has school in the morning, and Addison has daycare.
I’m sure she did. Willow knows the importance of academic achievement. I know we probably sound like bad parents pawning our children off on other people so we can have the house to ourselves. But when you have kids privacy goes out the window, and hearing Faith yell out ‘ride me harder cowgirl’ and then hearing me moan when I start to ride her harder would probably scar all three of our children for life. So us pawning them off on Willow and Sky doesn’t make us bad parents. We’re just looking out for their psychological health. And if looking out for their psychological health means I get to ride Faith like a bucking bronco then it works out for everybody. The kids don’t have anything to complain to a therapist about, and me and Faith get to enjoy each other for a night and not have to worry about keeping the noise down.
Anyway, so I’m almost to the cafeteria but then I change my mind. I’m not hungry right now and I don’t have any money on me anyway. So where am I going to go? Maybe I’ll just so wait for Faith in the hall where I was sitting. Sounds like a plan to me. So anyway, the last six months have been a little crazy. Joseph turned one in February. I know, it’s a little crazy to think that my baby boy is now a year and five months old. He’s walking now too, and getting into everything he can get his little hands on. At least he’s doing that when he’s not following me around. For whatever reason he’s still really clingy with me. He wants me to hold him all the time, and it’s only gotten worst since he learned to walk.
Another thing that he likes to do is wake up in the middle of the night and start crying out my name. I’ve tried to ignore it, and hoped that he would realize that I wasn’t going to give him any attention and then he’d go back to sleep. He cried for almost two hours before I finally caved. I picked him up, talked to him a little and let him snuggle up next to me in my bed. Faith was a little irritated because she’s always been against letting the kids sleep in our bed. I have no idea why. I mean, if it’s on a regular basis then yeah I can see her getting irritated, but the occasional late night snuggle? There’s nothing wrong with that. I think she just gets grumpy because she’s woken up in the middle of the night.
I never realized that having a kid like Joseph could be so exhausting. Every parent wants their kids to want them. Matthew was always all about Faith, and they were always playing together. But he wasn’t like this with her. He didn’t only want her all the time. And Addison is more independent from us then the boys. She’s always been about her big brother. Sure, sometimes she gets a little clingy, like when Ryder was killing those girls and Addison was seeing it, but she only wanted us because she was really scared. And again when I was pregnant with Joseph. She only wanted to be around me so much because she thought I was really sick, and that the baby was really sick.
Joseph follows me around all the time, and he cries for me to hold him, and it’s exhausting. He’ll go to Faith but not very often. He loves spending time with Willow and Sky though. He’s really good for them, and I have no idea why. I love my little boy, and I love spending time with him, but when I’m trying to get the house cleaned, and the bills paid I can’t cuddle with him and give him the attention that he wants. I’m thinking this August I’m going to put him in daycare. That way Faith and I will be able to go back to school, and it will be a lot easier on us because she won’t have to take night classes. Matthew will be at school, and Addison and Joseph will be at daycare. We can take the same class, pick the two up from daycare and be home before Matthew gets back from school.
I stop when I reach my destination. I look through the glass and smile a little bit at all the little babies that are in the nursery. Yeah, I came to look at the babies, so what? Maybe I’ll be able to spot Brittany’s baby. It shouldn’t be too hard, unless there are two babies with the last name of Lehane. I doubt that though. I remember after Matthew was born the nurse took him away and put him in the nursery so we could both get some rest. But I wasn’t tired and I just wanted to look at my little baby some more. It’s kind of hard to explain. It wasn’t really a need to hold him, or protect him. I just wanted to watch him.
I stood in front of that glass for two hours before anyone came looking for me. I had told Faith to go home that day and get some sleep, and get a shower. She was getting a little ripe. She found me, but she didn’t say anything. She wrapped her arms around me from behind and gave me a little kiss on my neck, and we stood there together for another hour before a nurse finally chased me back to my room. I was in the hospital for almost a week and Faith only went home the once, and even then I had to pretty much force her to leave. She was so protective of me, and sometimes it got a little scary. Her more violent tendencies started to come back to the surface when one doctor was getting a little snippy with me. She’s always had this bulldog personality, and she can control it most of the time.
I watch as a nurse walks into the room pushing one of those plastic basinets. She takes the baby out of it, and puts it in a different one that’s more towards the back. I must’ve completely zoned out because I haven’t been looking at the names. I watch as the nurse smiles and talks to the little baby that she just put in the basinet. I glance down at the nametag and it makes me frown a little. So, that’s not Faith’s little sibling. I still can’t tell if it’s a boy or a girl. Normally they wrap the babies in blue or pink blankets, but this baby has a white one. The mom must’ve packed it in her suitcase or something. First time moms can be very…anal about the different blankets that their baby is going to use.
She’ll learn very fast that it doesn’t really matter what blanket you use as long as they stay warm. And in a while there will be ‘the blanket’, and the baby will want only that one. Well, it doesn’t have to be a blanket, it could be a teddy bear, but there will be something special to the kid and they’ll want only that. Matthew’s already been through that phase. He had this toy dog that Faith bought him, and he wouldn’t go anywhere without it. But it got old, and dirty, and really gross. So one day I threw it out and told him Tucker ate it. I know that was a horrible thing to do, but you don’t understand how disgusting that toy got. I don’t think Matthew even looked at Tucker for a week. That poor dog got so depressed. It was really sad. But he eventually got over it.
Addison has to have her butterfly pillowcase or she can’t sleep. She doesn’t care if she has the matching sheets or blanket, all she cares about is the pillowcase. I have no idea why. I guess my kid is just weird that way. Actually, now that I’m thinking about it, I think she gets that from Faith. I have a couple different bed sets and Faith only likes a select few. One day I was putting on one that I thought would look nice for the summer she got all pissy about it, and when I finally snapped and asked her why she said that she doesn’t like the feel of the pillowcase. Anyway, Joseph has to have his really soft fleece blanket that I bought for him before he was born. He doesn’t have to be covered up with it, he just likes the feel of it against his face because it’s very soft. I wonder if Faith is done looking at her little sister yet, ‘cause I’m getting bored.
FPOV
I don’t know how, or when I got home, but here I am. The last thing I remember is holding my baby sister. She was starting to wake up and I was going to get to see her eyes. I’m lying in bed I must’ve fallen asleep at the hospital and either Buffy or my dad put me here. Hopefully Buffy since I’m in my pajamas. Wait…these aren’t my pajamas, unless I bought them while sleepwalking. They’re black and silk, and they feel really good against my skin, but I don’t remember buying them. Maybe Buffy got them for me as a little gift or something. I yawn and stretch my arms above my head and sit up. When did we buy a new comforter? Buffy always has me go linen shopping with her. And I would remember if she talked me into buying a pink comforter with little white daisies.
I think I need to have a talk with my wife. I get out of bed and walk down the hall. What happened to some of our family pictures? Some of them are gone. And there’s pictures of other people that I don’t recognize at all. This is getting really weird. I walk out into the living room but I don’t see anybody. I can’t help but notice that everything is different. There’s a new couch, a new loveseat, new recliner, new TV, new carpet, new everything. And where did that dog come from? It’s small and fluffy and I’ve never seen it before in my life. But it’s sitting on the couch licking itself. Ok, something must’ve happened back at the hospital. Maybe someone was dying a witch wanted to reverse time, but she wasn’t powerful enough to control the spell and it went ka-blooey, and it sent me forward in time. Does that make sense?
I see a picture on the end table by the couch and it makes my heart stop. Not literally or anything even though it feels like it. I walk over and slowly pick up the wooden frame. It’s a picture of all of us: me, Buffy, Mattie, Addy, and Joey. Except we’re all different. We’re all older. Joey looks about five, so Addy would be around eight, and Mattie would be about fourteen. Please don’t let this be a spell that can’t be reversed. Because if this is a spell and I can’t go back in time then I might lose it. All of those years just gone. I don’t remember any of it. I don’t have those memories of seeing my kids growing up. I need to find Buffy. Maybe she knows what’s going on. I put the picture down and head for the kitchen. The reason I’m going towards the kitchen is because I hear people talking.
I stand in the doorway and just look. Buffy is at the stove cooking breakfast, and the kids are sitting at the table. At least two of them are. My eyes tear up a little when I see them. Addy has got to be at least sixteen. She’s wearing a pink, low cut shirt that’s showing off more cleavage then I would ever let her get away with. She’s wearing a white, zip-up sweater but it’s open so there’s no point in wearing it. Her hair is long, and curly. It’s a lot like mine, only the curls aren’t as wild so she must’ve done something to it, maybe put some type of product in it. She’s beautiful. She’s probably a little heartbreaker. At least I hope so, ‘cause if anyone breaks my daughter’s heart they’re gonna know what it feels like to get their ass handed to them by a slayer.
I watch as she picks up a strawberry from her little bowl of fruit. She acts like she’s going to eat it but at the last second she throws it at Joey. It lands on his light orange shirt and a little red spot shows up. He starts yelling at her and she starts laughing. Then Buffy yells at both of them. Ok, so not much has changed, but instead of picking on Mattie, she’s picking on Joey. He looks so much like my dad. He isn’t as tall, or as stocky, but I’m sure when he gets older he will be. If Addy is sixteen then Joey is…thirteen. So he probably isn’t in the business of breaking hearts yet, but he’s going to be handsome enough to run the company. His hair is cut really short and his shirt is really baggy. So I guess that look still hasn’t gone out of style. As long as his pants down sag down below his ass I really don’t care.
I look over at Buffy and she’s so…stunning. If my math is right then she’s probably around forty-six, but you definitely can’t tell by looking at her. She’s in form fitting capris, she finally has an ass, and her legs are nice and tan. Her shirt is also pretty snug. I can’t see what it looks like from the front, but if I know my wife then it’s probably showing just the right amount of cleavage. She’s died her hair again and it’s a really light blonde color. She got it cut too, and it’s at her shoulders. Why did she get her hair cut really short? I like it long ‘cause I like to pull on it when we have sex. I guess I’ll just have to make due with what I got.
I decide to walk in the room since I’ve been standing here for like five minutes and nobody’s noticed me. As soon as I step in the room the kids look up at me. Addy’s still smiling but Joey looks a little…disappointed. Ok, did I say no to him doing something or going somewhere? ‘Cause if my kid is going to be mad at me then I’d really like to know why. I mean, this isn’t fair. If this is some kind of spell then I think the memories should come rushing back to me like in that movie The Butterfly Affect. Sure it hurt like hell, and sometimes the guy’s nose bled, but I’d rather deal with that then not know anything at all. I walk up behind Buffy wrap my arms around her. She tenses up a little bit, which is really fuckin weird.
“Hey baby,” I say and give her a little kiss on the neck. She shivers a little bit and then she shrugs me off of her. What the fuck? Buffy only does that when she’s pissed at me for something and she doesn’t want me to touch her. “Baby what’s the matter?” She doesn’t say anything, she just focuses on the bacon that’s cooking in the skillet. Well, that’s weird. I let go of her because she obviously doesn’t want me touching her. I sit down at the table and start stacking my plate with pancakes and sausage. I’m sitting next to Addy, and she leans over and gives me a kiss on the cheek.
“Good morning, Mama,” she says in a very happy voice. Well, at least someone is happy to see me. Wait, I recognize that tone. I mean, obviously I’ve never heard Addy use it ‘cause the last I remember she was only four. But that’s the sound of a teenage girl buttering up her parent right before she asks them for something. It’s a universal sound that I know very well. I never had to use it, but some of the girl’s I’d fool around with had to. “So, did you think about what I asked last night?” Couldn’t tell ya. Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t, but I honestly don’t know. I give her a little look and she keeps talking. “You know, about going to Colin’s party tonight.” Colin, who the fuck is Colin? Please tell me my daughter isn’t dating a guy named Colin, because if she is I just might lose it.
“Tell me again, what type of party is this?” Ten bucks says it’s a high school kegger. I might be wrong but that’s a very slim chance. Like I said I know teenage girls and if she’s trying to better me up this much with that little kiss on the cheek and that really sweet tone then she really wants to go to this party. And if she really wants to go to this party that means there’s going to be some illegal stuff going on or it wouldn’t be a big deal.
“Just some of us from school are going to be hanging out at Colin’s house tonight. His parents are going to be there and I’ll be home by midnight. Please, Mama, pretty please can I go?” She starts pouting and I really want to say yes because she looks so sad. I have a feeling that she uses that pout to get her way a lot, and by the way she’s asking me and not Buffy I guess I let her have her way a lot. That may be true but there’s no way in hell I’m about to let my daughter go to some party and get completely trashed.
“Well, that sounds more like a high school kegger to me.” Her face falls a little and her eyes get a little big. Yeah, ‘cause it’s such a shock that I know what’s really going to be going on at that house tonight. Please I used to be the number one party girl. I guess we never got around to filling our kids in on our history. But that’s ok. Does any parent ever tell their children what they were really like in high school? I highly doubt it. “And how old are you again?” I try to sound as casual about that as possible. As if I’m asking just to prove a point. But I really want to know. I need to know how old my kids are. I need to know how much I missed out on.
“Fifteen,” she says with a suspicious tone. Holy shit, she’s only fifteen? And what makes her think she can wear that shirt? And how the hell does a fifteen year old girl have breasts that big? Well, am her mother so I guess that makes sense. But still, why would I let her wear that shirt? I wonder what other clothes she has back in that closet of hers. I’ll have to check it out today and throw out all the ones I think are too promiscuous for a fifteen-year*old girl. Ok, I need to calm down. I sorta promised myself a long time ago that I wasn’t going to become this type of mom. But fuck that, she’s only fifteen.
“No, you can’t go to Colin’s party. There’s no way in hell I’m going to let my daughter get drunk and felt up by a bunch of drunk guys.” The look on her face is complete shock. Wow, I guess I really do give her what she wants all the time or she wouldn’t’ be looking at me like that. Then I look down at her shirt and my eyebrows furrow a little bit. “And go change your shirt. You’re only fifteen for God’s sake.” She just sits there, staring at me like I grew a second head or something. Ok, that’s getting very irritating. “I mean it, don’t just stare at me. Get your ass up and go change into something a little less slutty.” She gets up with this total ‘I hate the world’ attitude and I have to stop myself from rolling my eyes. She stomps off towards the living room.
“You never let me do anything fun! I hate you!” she yells at the top of her lungs. Yep, it’s official, my daughter is a stereotypical teenager. And here I thought she’d be more like me. Except for the sleeping around, and getting hammered, and dropping out of school. Ok, so maybe it’s better that she’s like this. I would rather have her be a total stereotype, right out of a bad Lifetime made for TV movie then have her be like me when I was her age. Anyway, I know what will really pissed her off.
“Well, that’s too bad sweetie, ‘cause I love you!” I yell out and I hear her scream from the living room. That was actually kind of fun. Maybe this whole ‘being a mom of a teenage daughter’ won’t be so bad. Wait, what the fuck am I saying? Of course it’s going to be bad. Teenager girls are the most unstable creatures on the planet. Like what just happened. One second she’s all cheerful and bubbly, and the next she’s stomping off and yelling that she hates me. That’s a perfect explain that things are going to be hell.
“Well that’s a first,” I hear Buffy say and she puts the platter of bacon down in front of Joey. Hey, don’t I get any? She’s sits down next to Joey and I find that a little weird. We always sit next to each other at the table even if she’s mad at me. It’s just what we do. Ok, what the hell is going on? She must be really pissed off at me for something and I want to know what. And I still want to know how the fuck I got here. I’m going to have to get her alone to question her though. I don’t want to freak the kids out. I give her a questioning look and she rolls her eyes. “You never say no to her. It’s just a little odd. Are you feeling ok?” What’s with that tone of voice? “I guess it doesn’t matter. It’s time to wake up.” What? Why did she say that? She looks me dead in the eye and she look wicked serious. “Faith, it’s time to wake up.”
“Faith wake up,” I hear someone say, but the voice is distant. Wait, what happened to Buffy, and the kitchen and my teenage kids? “Faith, wake up.” I slowly open my eyes and blink a couple of times. The room is darker then the one I was just in. It takes my eyes a few seconds to adjust. Where the fuck am I? I take a look around, and it takes me a minute or two but I finally realize that I’m in the hospital, still sitting in my dad’s lap, holding the baby. Only his arms are supporting mine since I dozed off. I hope I didn’t hurt her. “Dolly-face, it’s time to wake up.” I wonder how long I was out. “Come on dolly-face, Grace needs to eat now.” So that’s what that really annoying sound is?
“Ok Daddy,” I whisper but I don’t move. I’m still really tired. Wait…did I just call him ‘daddy’? I haven’t called him that since I was a kid. I slowly stand up and he helps me. I guess he’s afraid I’m going to drop the baby. Completely understandable since I am feeling a little wobbly. I hand him my baby sister, and he walks over to the bed. So I guess Brittany is going to be breastfeeding. Well, I guess I better go since I really don’t want to stick around for the show. Ok, I know that I have breastfed, and Buffy has breastfed, but that doesn’t mean I want to watch somebody else breastfeed if I don’t have to.
“Well I’m gonna leave you guys alone,” I say and my dad smiles at me. I guess he knows I’m a little uncomfortable standing here. “I’ll try to stop by tomorrow though. I have Joey all day so I don’t know when.” I give my dad a hug and he gives me a kiss on the cheek. I smile a little because his five o’ clock shadow tickled my skin. Yeah, yeah, I know I’m acting like a total girl right now, but I can’t help it. My dad makes me feel like a little kid again. I guess it’s just a cast of ‘daddy’s girl’ syndrome. I am a total daddy’s girl, and I always have been. Even if it wasn’t with my real dad, but we’ll just not think about that right now ‘cause it’s depressing.
Anyway, I leave and walk back down the long hall, and out the big swinging doors. Buffy said she was going to the cafeteria, but she feels close by. The cafeteria is downstairs so there’s no way the little tingles I get on my spine would be this strong. So I do the whole blood hound thing and follow the feeling until I see her. She’s standing in front of the nursery looking at all of the babies, and she has this little smile on her face like she’s thinking about the kids when they were babies. Aw, the ol’ days before they talked. It’s not that I don’t like that my kids are growing up, but talking leads to back talking, and back talking can be very frustrating when you’re in a hurry to get someone and someone won’t put on their pants because they don’t like the color. Oh yeah, Addy has all the symptoms of a spoiled teenager and she’s only four.
“Hey B,” I say as I walk towards her. She whips her head in my direction and she smiles. I guess I scared her a little. “I thought you said you were gonna get something to eat?” She shrugs her shoulders a little bit and looks back into the window. I still don’t really understand why they have the babies out on display. Sure babies are cute, but they’re still people. How would you like to be put out on display like an exhibit at the zoo? Anyway, I stand behind her and wrap my arms around her waist and rest my chin on her shoulder, just like I did that time we stood out in front of the display and watched Mattie. He was so small, and the most beautiful thing in the world. “They named her Grace.” I can tell she’s smiling and I roll my eyes.
“Don’t roll your eyes at me.” It’s creepy how we don’t even have to look at each other to know what we’re going to do. “Grace is a pretty name. Besides, they could have named her Hope, or Charity.” That’s true. I smile a little bit and give B a kiss on her pulse point. She holds her breath for a few seconds and it makes my smile get a little bigger. I start to lightly suck on the same spot and she inhales a deep breath. “Trying to get me worked up again?” Maybe. I was a little cheated out of our fun tonight. B hasn’t ridden me like that since our anniversary. I gently scrape my teeth against her warm skin and she moans a little. “Take me home.” My pleasure.
BPOV
“Brittany, she is so beautiful.” Yeah, I know I’m supposed to be shopping with Kim today, but I decided that the birth of my sister in law is a good reason to postpone the trip. Matthew is at school, Addison is at daycare and Willow is watching Joseph for me. I now owe her an all expense paid shopping trip at the mall for doing me that favor. Apparently things didn’t go so smooth last night. According to Willow my little bundle of joy woke up twelve times last night and called out for me. It took both Willow and Sky over half an hour each time to calm him down, and send him back to the land of the unconscious.
“Thank you,” Brittany says, and gives her baby girl a little kiss on the top of her head. I smile a little bit, but it’s a bittersweet smile. I am happy for Brittany, but at the same time I miss that feeling of holding your newly born little baby, and kissing them, and snuggling with them, and feeding them, and watching all the different expressions cross their little face at all the different sounds and feelings. I look over at Faith, she’s sitting in one of the chairs that are against the wall. She had her dad are looking through some motorcycle magazine.
“Don’t even think about it Buffy,” she says casually and she doesn’t even look up from that stupid magazine. I know, I know, I shouldn’t be longing for another baby because we have three kids already and the youngest is only a hear and a half. I’ll wait until Joseph is two before I start asking for another. I don’t know why but I’ve always wanted four kids. I know that we’ll have to move into a bigger house if we do decide to have another. Things are cramped enough as it is. “I’m gonna go get some coffee. Anyone want anything?” We all decline her offer and she sends a little smile my way before she leaves the room. I wonder what that was all about.
“Do you want to hold her?” Brittany asks, which is a little bit of a surprise. She’s been very...protective of her little girl. The only people she’s let hold the baby are Chris, and the nurse who brought Grace in here. She wouldn’t let Faith hold her, which is a little weird. I know the two aren’t exactly close, but that’s Faith’s baby sister, you’d think Brittany would be willing to compromise her personal feelings of resentment for a few minutes to let Faith hold her sister. The two of them have been...chilly towards her each other at best. They both want Chris’ constant attention, and even if they don’t realize it they’re pulling both me and Chris into the middle. It sucks so much, but it’s not like I can do anything about it.
“Yes, I’d like that.” I lean forward a little and she carefully hands me the little girl in her arms. What is it about holding a newborn that fills a person with such fuzzy feelings? There should be scientific research done on this. Anyway, I cradle Grace close to my body because newborns need to feel secure. She starts squirming around a little, and making this little whining noise. She is so damn cute. “Hey there little girl.” I smile and laugh a little as she frowns very heavy while she tries to get comfortable. “Aw, don’t frown at me. It’s not nice at all.” I give her a little kiss on the forehead and she frowns even more. And that look really is genetic, who knew?
Addison used to frown a lot when she was a baby, so many it is genetic. I’ll have to ask Chris if Faith was the same way. I would ask him now but Faith is back and she doesn’t like it when I ask questions about her childhood because her dad will always remember some embarrassing story and he’s not afraid to tell anybody those stories. And poor Faith, her ears turn so red when she gets embarrassed. Embarrassing Faith isn’t an easy thing to do, but her dad does it so well. I usually instigate the entire thing, and she gets really butt hurt about it, and she’s told a couple embarrassing stories about me. They weren’t from my childhood, but they were still embarrassing. It didn’t bug me as much as she thought it would. I was expecting her to eventually lash out and do something like that.
“Faith, wanna hold her?” I ask and give her a little smile. I know I shouldn’t have done that, but Brittany wasn’t going to ask her anytime soon and it isn’t fair that everyone but Faith gets to hold the baby. I’m not even blood related and Brittany let me hold her. I chance a sideways glace over at Brittany and she doesn’t look mad or anything. Oh, so this was a pride thing, huh? She doesn’t care if Faith holds the baby she just wasn’t going to give in and ask if Faith wants to hold her. These two need to get over themselves because this rivalry is getting very irritating. Anyway, Faith nods her head and holds her arms out. She is so lazy, I swear if I wasn’t around to take care of her she’d be so lost. I get up and carefully hand her the baby. Faith gets a soft smile on her face as she looks into the little blue eyes staring up at her.
“Yep,” Chris says with a little nod of his head. “She looks just like you when you were a baby.” So that’s what Faith looked like when she was a baby? I wonder if Chris has any pictures of Faith when she was little? I’ve never asked, but I’m sure he has some. Yeah he went to prison all those years ago, but her mom’s stuff wasn’t all thrown out when she died. Most of the personal items were saved for a family member to claim. I remember because Chris was telling us about it, and he asked if Faith wanted any of it and she got really upset. So he probably has pictures, he’s just afraid to show her.
“Knock, knock,” someone says at the door. I turn around and see four women standing there with big smiles on their faces. They look about Brittany’s age. These must be the people she usually goes away with for Christmas. I remember her talking about them a little. “I hope you’re not too tired for more visitors.” The leader of the group is tall, blonde and hot. I glance over at Faith and she’s checking her out. I want to glare at her but I don’t really have the right since I was just checking her out too. Brittany waves them in and they rush to her side and gives her hugs and kiss her on her cheeks and her forehead.
“We would have been here sooner but my car broke down. I think it’s about time I start looking for a new one,” one of the other girls says with a little smile on her face. “So, where’s that little baby girl of yours? We’re just dieing to see her.” I look over at Faith and I can tell she’s a little disgruntled that she got cheated out of her turn to hold the baby. But she doesn’t make a big deal out of it because that would be rude. She gets up and carefully hands Brittany the baby and all of her friends fawn over little Grace. Is it weird that all four of the girls are blonde? It’s like they’re a pack or something. I’ve never wanted to let my hair to go back to its natural color more then right now.
“I should probably make the introductions,” Brittany says and sits up in the bed a little more. I was wondering when those were going to be made. “This is Chris’ daughter, Faith, and her wife Buffy.” The girls smile and say hi to us. “This is Shannon.” That’s the ‘leader’ of the group. “Renée.” That’s the one who’s car broke down. “Heidi, and Jessica.” Those two have said anything yet. They’re both very attractive though. Heidi’s hair is long, all the way down to her hips, and it’s a very light blonde. Jessica is a little shorter then the others, and her hair is shoulder length and more of a dishwater blonde. I still think it’s so weird that they’re all blonde.
Anyway, I get off of the bed now that they’re here. I don’t want to get in the way or anything. And since there isn’t another chair in here I just sit down in Faith’s lap. None of them looked grossed out or anything when Brittany introduced us as wives, so this should be ok. And if it’s not we were here first. I’m not going to let them bug me. This little gathering supposed to be about Brittany and the baby, not arguing because me and Faith want to be a little affectionate in public. Besides they’re too busy fawning over Brittany and Grace to notice us. Which is a good thing. That’s why we’re all here. I do have to admit that watching from the sidelines is a little boring. No wonder Faith and Chris were looking at that magazine.
I can’t get over how cute Grace is, or the fact that that’s what Faith looked like when she was a baby. All of this baby stuff is making me want another one. Maybe I can talk Faith into it when we get home. Wouldn’t it be really cool if we had another girl. Another little baby girl to dress in cute little pink dresses, and little pink shoes. There would be so much pink. Way more pink then with Addison. I don’t know why I just have a feeling that if we had another girl there would be pink baby stuff everywhere. That’s kind of the whole point of having a girl, so you can dress them up like dolls or something. I know that sounds kind of mean, but it’s the truth. Then again, I think I’ll wait a couple years. I think I’d rather have Joseph potty trained before we have another baby. Sounds like a plan to me. Hopefully Faith will agree.
