Chapter 37- A Desperate Meetin’ in a Faithless World
She left me once, she left me twice
She left me three times or more
But no, she didn't leave me at all
It's harder to smile when you've lied to a friend
But no, it's not hard at all~unfaithful by The Wonder Stuff
I hold her in place as my hand works its magic, and I tell her she’s gotta be quiet.
I’m in charge of this particular mission and she’s gotta stand down. Her moans are makin’ me hot and I just wanna let it all go. Fuck her so hard she sees stars.
All that’s goin’ through my mind on a loop is, “Satsu won’t mind if I help her out…Satsu won’t mind if I help her out…”
Her fingers find my clit and I whisper her name.
“What was that?”
“Buffy…” I whisper again.
“WHAT?!”
“Buffy…ma’am?”
“Better,” I can hear the smirk in her voice.
And just like that she’s running the show.
And what Satsu don’t know won’t hurt her. ‘Cause she’d be pissed if she knew I snuck off to be with Buffy.
“I wanna fuck you, Faith. Can I do that?”
Uhhhhh, yes, forever, always and now would be good.
“Hmmm? You want me to fuck you?”
I can only nod, my brain has somehow gotten disconnected from my mouth.
“Good, ‘cause I wanna do that, so, so much.” She says as she slips down from the bed. I hope she’s not hurtin’ herself, but I guess she knows what she’s doin’.
She pulls me by my calves and throws my legs over her shoulders as she kneels down in front of me, on the side of the bed.
As soon as her tongue touches my clit my mind goes off into some distant land, and I can tell I’ve smacked the bed, hard. A couple more minutes later and there’s a soft knock on the door.
“Buffy, are you ok in there?”
She keeps lickin’ me and winks as she pushes her tongue into my hole.
Fuck! What’s she doin’?! Does she want me to answer for her? We can’t let anyone know I’m teleportin’ here. I wanna be safe, but I also feel like people wouldn’t understand about me and B havin’ sex, while we’ve got Scoobies and Slayers missin’.
I don’t say dead, ‘cause I haven’t found any bodies yet, and I’m not totally convinced they were even in there at the time.
“Buffy?”
“I’m fine, Aunt Dee!”
“Are you sure? I heard a noise.”
“It was me swatting at a fly in my dream, I guess.”
“Oh, you were sleepin’? Sorry, honey! I’ll leave you alone.”
“Thanks for checking on me, Dee.”
“Anytime…you sure you’re ok?”
“I’m great.”
“Ok, then. Goodnight, honey.”
“Night.”
We hear her start to go but then she turns back and says, “If you need to talk, any time, I’m here. I can’t imagine what you must be goin’ through.”
I whisper to Buffy. “She’s freaked out, you better let her in.”
Buffy nods at me. She gets up and tells Aunt Dee to wait a second, then goes to wash her hands and face.
When she’s done, she goes to the door and then checks to see that I’m ready for her to open the door; I blow her a kiss and nod. When she opens the door Aunt Dee smiles gratefully and B steps away from the entrance to let her in.
“Jesus Christ!!! Fff” Buffy puts her hand over Dee’s mouth to stop her from wakin’ the whole house and alertin’ them that I’m here. Buffy pulls her in and then takes her hand away from my Aunt’s mouth. Dee lowers her voice, “Sorry, Madonna mia!” She clutches her chest. “Faith, what are you doin’ here?!”
“Came to be with my wife and our belly, is that ok with you?”
“Oh honey!” She rushes over to hug me, but I ain’t budgin’ from this bed. I left the towel back in the other room before I teleported here. She stops when she notices I ain’t gettin’ up. “Was that why I heard a noise? You’re naked under there?” She gasps.
I roll my eyes at her and Buffy laughs but she goes over to her bag and pulls out a t-shirt and shorts and tosses ‘em to me. I put ‘em on under the covers and then hop outta the bed. Aunt Dee wraps me up in a bear hug.
“I’m not sayin’ anything to you for comin’ here and bein’ with Buffy. I’m sorry for interruptin’, I just wanted to make sure she was ok, and…”
“Yeah, I know Aunt Dee, we’ll get Francie back. Ok?”
“And Willow, and Dawnie, and Mr. Giles, and Xander, and Andrew. God bless him, he gets on my nerves but I’ve come to love him like the son I never had.”
“Really? Son?”
“Well, maybe step son.” She chuckles and we laugh.
“I know, Aunt Dee, it’s a lot to take in, especially with you just findin’ out about all this stuff.”
“They say it was terrorists…ya know, on the TV they’re sayin’ it’s a terrorist attack.”
“You’ll come to understand, that the media and the cops turn a blind eye to our world.” Buffy says.
“How come?”
“’Cause who wants to know the boogeyman really exists? Parents would be pissin’ the bed along with their kids. It’s just not wise. Although people stayin’ away from cemeteries after dark, or not goin’ out after dark period, in a hellmouth town would be really helpful. But whatta ya gonna do, right?”
“Right.” Aunt Dee says with some skepticism. She looks at me then at Buffy, then back at me. “So, you…yeah, I should go.”
Buffy goes over to her and hugs her tight, and I come up on the other side and do the same thing.
After we break the hugfest, Aunt Dee goes to leave and I follow her out of the room closin’ the door behind me.
“Hey, Dee, really don’t worry, I’m on it, ok?”
“Why would anyone wanna do that to you guys, Faith?”
“I dunno, but I’m gonna find out. I just need you to hold things together here.”
“Don’t fuckin’ give me a speech like,” She lowers her voice to my register, ‘If I don’t come back take care of Buffy for me’.”
Heh, shit, she knows me too well and I should kick her ass for makin’ fun of my voice. But she’s my aunt so she gets a pass.
“You ain’t goin’ nowhere, not as long as I’m alive, you got that?” She looks in my eyes and I’m scared.
She’d scare the fuckin’ devil himself.
“Got it.”
“Good, now go in there to Buffy, she had that look in her eyes.” She winks at me.
“What look?”
“I’ve been pregnant three times, I had the look a lot when I was as pregnant as she is. Made your Uncle Jim late to work on many occasions.”
“Ew, ok, gotcha, stop sharin’ alright?!”
She shoves me, “Ha! Oh, and me walkin’ in on you two doin’ things twice now isn’t too much sharin’?”
“We weren’t ‘doin’ things’ when you walked in, when you knocked, yeah, but not when you walked in.” I wink at her and she laughs.
“Get goin’, strunze.”
“Love ya, Dee.”
“Ditto, Faith.”
Man, that makes me feel so much better. Hopeful even.
I dunno why.
“So where were we?” Buffy purrs in my ear. She’s on me as soon as I’m back in the room.
“You still wanna?”
She looks kinda guilty and now I feel like a complete ass. She can’t help it if she’s feelin’ mega horny, it happens, just like Aunt Dee said, and that thought just made me shudder.
“C’mon, and sit on my lap here, B.” I pat my lap as I sit on the edge of the bed.
“I’ll crush you.” She pouts.
“You’re not that big, and besides, since when did I turn fragile?”
That gets a smile from her and she stands more in front of me but she still doesn’t sit on my lap right away. I’m gonna have to make this right, so I take her by the hand and turn her facin’ away from me, pullin’ her down onto my lap. I place my hands on her stomach and she puts her hands over mine. We sit like that for a while, not sayin’ nothin’ just bein’ with each other, quietly.
I feel some weird things goin’ on under the surface of her stomach. Feels all bubbly.
“That happen all the time?”
“Lately, it’s just been like I’ve got gas bubbles, but it’s not really gas.”
I kiss her shoulder.
“What’s the matter Faith?”
“Why you think somethin’s the matter, B?”
“Because you let out a sigh before you kissed my shoulder.”
“Oh, of course, I forgot you spoke kisses and sighs.”
“I do,” She chuckles. “Now what were you thinking?”
I’m about to say nothin’, but then that’s a complete give away, so I decide to surprise her and go with somethin’.
“I just was thinkin’ how much I’m puttin’ you through.”
“That’s a start, a completely crazy start, but keep going.”
Bitch. Heh.
“Well, if it weren’t for you bein’ pregnant…” She cuts me off with a scoff.
“Just stop that whole line of thinking! You’re making me nuts with it, Faith! We both wanted this, you didn’t force me to get pregnant!”
I shudder at the emphasis she put on the word force.
Damn, fuckin’ insecurities. They’re really pissin’ her off and that’s the opposite of what I was tryin’ to accomplish here.
“I know, I’m sorry. I just…you coulda been with me tonight, lookin’ for the gang.”
We’re quiet for a while. And then I hear her sigh.
“What’s the matter, Buffy?”
She sighs again.
“B?”
“I feel…”
I let her say what she’s gotta, not tryin’ to rush her.
“Whatta ya feel, baby?”
“Selfish…I guess.”
I give her shoulder another kiss.
“And grateful that I don’t have to be the one in there, looking for the bodies of my sister and friends.”
Damn, that brings tears to my eyes. But I suck it up, I don’t wanna have this turn into a bawlfest, ‘cause I still am positive about findin’ them alive somewhere. Maybe a vault or somethin’.
“Will’s a clever witch, she woulda thought of somethin’. To get ‘em out of there in time.” She fuckin’ better have, I’m not gonna be happy if I gotta sweep up Scooby bits. And yeah, that sounds cold and callous, but I gotta be or I’m gonna just cry like a baby for hours, and that’s not gonna help no one. “I promise, B. I’ll find ‘em.”
“I know you will, Faith. With you and Satsu on the job, I’m feeling much better about not being there.”
“I wouldn’t let you go even if you did want to be there. The dust and shit, even with masks it’s been hard breathin’.”
“Poor baby.” She turns and gives me a sweet kiss.
And just like that I want her again, so, so bad.
As soon as the kiss breaks we look in each other’s eyes. I can see what I’m feelin’ reflected in her beautiful hazel eyes, they’re darker right now, kinda almost green. Man, I hope the baby has her eyes, not just dull brown. Although B says she loves my brown eyes, but she’s a little nuts, so I don’t listen.
“You wanna lay down a little?”
She nods.
I help her off my lap and then slide up with her on the bed. Once she’s settled I cradle her to me and bury my face in her neck. I breathe deep. That’s the stuff I’ve been thinkin’ about all night. Shit, it’s like crack to me.
When I’m nibblin’ and suckin’ on her neck she pushes me away. Fuck, I’m dumb, she’s just lookin’ for comfort, I shouldn’t be tryin’ to fuck her.
I lift my head up and go to say I’m sorry but she looks like she’s got somethin’ to say, so I raise an eyebrow in question.
“I was interrupted earlier, I still wanna…”
Heh. Fuck me.
FUCK ME, DUDE!! She’s makin’ me so fuckin’ horny!
“Wanna what?” I manage to rasp out.
She looks embarrassed and it makes me wanna laugh. “Eat…out.”
“Can’t deny a pregnant woman, when she wants to eat.” I wink at her.
I sit up and help her off with her night gown and then go to take off my t-shirt but she stops me. She’s got that look that tells me she’s in charge and I have to be patient. Once my t-shirt has joined her nightgown on the floor she cups my breasts. That’s got me moanin’ and she tells me I have to be quiet.
“We shouldn’t wake up everyone else, they shouldn’t know.”
Once she makes me come, the whole fuckin’ state’ll know, and probably half of New York. This particular safe house is over in Jersey, it’s a freestandin’ town house that’s surrounded by an apartment buildin’ and rows of two-family houses. You would never know it was back here unless you were lookin’ at it from above.
Rona used to rent it out before she went down to D.C. as leader, she liked the area, and the people, all diverse. Plus I think she was in love with a Brazilian chick who lived in the house in front. But it was a really great find. Giles immediately bought it when it was put up for sale. If I didn’t love our apartment, I’d have come here to live. Tree lined street with actual grass, but still close together. I like close together, don’t do that well with spacious and sprawlin’. It’s real close to the city too, just a few PATH stops away from Manhattan.
As I’m thinkin’ all this, B gets me ready so she can start workin’ her magic on my body, she slides off the bed and has me positioned just like she did before Aunt Dee interrupted. She winks at me and sits back on her haunches, slidin’ her hands down her body and right to her snatch.
Fuck! My pussy contracts at that beautiful sight. She better take these shorts off me soon, they’re gettin’ soaked.
Next she slides her hands up my legs, I can feel she’s leavin’ a trail of her wetness on me. Markin’ me. In a flash, she pounces and I fall back onto the mattress, she’s breathin’ me in and tryin’ to pull the shorts off with her teeth.
Damn!
“Woah, B! Chill girl, I’ll help ya get the shorts off.”
Fuck, I think she just growled at me. I better just lay back and let her have her way. Who am I to deny her what she wants?
She pulls more forcefully with her teeth and I lift my hips a bit, helpin’ her out. When she gets them half way off, she decides it’s takin’ too long and reaches up and snatches them off.
God, I LOVE when she gets like this. It just makes me crazy. She takes a long leisurely lick up my thigh as she’s makin’ her way up my body.
I know she’ll probably want to spend some time kissin’ and stuff, but is it wrong to want her to just get busy doin’ her thing?
Next thing I know I can feel her nose pressed into my snatch and she’s breathin’ in deep.
“God, Faith, you smell so good. So, sweet. It’s making my mouth water.”
Oh fuck me, just fuck me, please.
She grants my silent request by pushin’ her tongue in my pussy, and wigglin’ it around. I lift my head to see the sight that makes my heart want to blow the fuck outta my chest each and every time I see it.
Buffy Summers suckin’ on my pussy. It just doesn’t get any better than that.
I’m gonna kiss Satsu for breakin’ through her straight barrier. Well, I would kiss her if I wanted to get a Buffy sized shoe imbedded in my ass, so I gotta be careful with stuff like that. Especially with the way her hormones have been doin’ the whacky lately.
Not that I’d go around kissin’ other girls though. I’m strictly a one woman girl now.
Forever.
I lay back down and put the pillow over my face while she works her magic, and she fuckin’ works it good!!
My feet automatically hook under her arm pits tryin’ to pull her closer and get her in deeper. I can hear her chuckle at my eagerness.
I wanna scream at her teasin’ but then she gives me what I want. What I need. What I crave.
She replaces her tongue with two fingers, seekin’ out my g-spot and gluin’ her lips onto my clit. The pillow is gettin’ wet with my spit ‘cause I’ve stuffed it in my mouth to drown out the yells and guttural moans.
I can’t control my legs and I’m worried I’m gonna hurt her with ‘em, but she’s not stoppin’ or givin’ me a chance to get my wits about me, so I’ll just do what I can not to kick the shit out of her back and head. She adds another finger and thrusts harder and keeps her suctionin’ up on my clit. She’s found my g with her fingers and she’s hittin’ it with every thrust.
Fuck she’s so, so good.
After a few minutes of her thrustin’, lickin’ and suckin’, I start to feel like I’m tryin’ to hold onto something that can barely be held and it’s stretchin’ thinner and thinner until it fuckin’ snaps and my head explodes.
Fuck that, my whole body explodes.
When I come to, I’m on the bed in a proper position. Ya know, not with my head hangin’ off the ceilin’ all splattered, and my arms and legs stuck to different walls, like I thought I’d be. Buffy’s cuddled into my side, breathin’ kinda heavy, I’m about to get upset with her about strainin’ herself, when she turns her head slightly and latches that beautiful mouth onto my nipple.
“Mmmm, Buffy, God, what’re you doin’?” I gasp.
I hear some rustlin’ of the covers she’s got draped over us, and it’s perfectly timed with her moans.
Oh yeah, baby, I know what my dirty girl’s doin’! She’s gettin’ herself off. Oh fuck! That’s too hot!
But I’m here and I like to be involved as much as possible. I’m considerate like that. Or selfish, but whatever, I want some and I’m gonna get it!
She whimpers her disapproval when I break her contact with my breast, and I immediately pull her up more so I can kiss her pout away. I thrust my tongue in her mouth as soon as I thrust my fingers in her eager pussy, keepin’ in time with the back and forth motion. She’s still fingerin’ her clit and her moans are gettin’ desperate. Even though I’ve got a lock on her mouth she’s still bein’ way too noisy, and I want her to get even noisier, so I break our kiss and do a quick silence spell.
“OH FUCK YES!! FAITH!! YES!!!!”
Wow, that blew out my eardrum, but who the fuck cares, she’s gonna come for me. Good, hard, and now.
Her pussy is spasmin’ on my fingers and she’s thrashin’ around like a fish outta water. I slink down on the bed and position her sweet hole right over my waterin’ mouth. I’m not the only one with a sweet pussy. Buffy’s like fuckin’ candy to me.
“OH GOD, YES!!!!” She yells as she feels my tongue pushin’ into her hole. I brace myself for what I know are gonna be some hard thrusts into my face, ‘cause she’s at that point in her orgasm where she’s just workin’ on instinct.
Instinct and feelin’. Two things she knows really well.
I got some instincts of my own, and right now they’re tellin’ me that her clit can handle just a little bit more, so I pull her up slightly and attach my mouth on her pulsin’ bud like I’m suckin’ on a piece of ice in the hot desert. Heh. Her hole keeps meltin’ juice all over my chin.
I’m gonna love clean up time.
My hands are pullin’ and kneadin’ at her ass cheeks, and I’m just lightly rimmin’ her hole back there. It’s just to give her some nice sensations, we haven’t done that in a while and I don’t wanna hurt her, I’m all about given her sensations that’ll have her ridin’ the white hot pillowy clouds of a mind blowin’ orgasm for a while longer.
And I have a feelin’ that it’s workin’ ‘cause she’s fuckin’ my face like tomorrow’s never comin’. But she’s gonna come, that’s for fuckin’ true.
All of a sudden she rears up and her body goes rigid, and if I didn’t know that she did this when she’s really havin’ an intense orgasm, I’d think she just had a heart attack or a stroke or somethin’. Her body’s quiverin’ and shakin’ and she lets out a high pitched “FAITH!” That would be heard in fuckin’ Schenectady. I can hear some dogs barkin’ in the distance, and I wonder if they can hear through the silence spell.
I think some fucked up things durin’ sex, I think I’ve told you that before.
While she’s comin’ down off her high, I’m in my glory just where I am, lickin’ and lappin’ at the juice that’s runnin’ out of her hole. It’s givin’ me the greatest joy just to lay here and try and catch it before it drips onto her clit and mound, and lappin’ at it makes her quiver and shudder.
“Faith…” She says breathlessly. “Y-you…you gotta stop.”
“Mmmmm, don’t wanna.”
She rolls away and I go with her.
“P-please, Faith, just let me rest a bit.”
I hold myself up above her body, just hoverin’ on my arms and do a bear-like walk above my prey. My beautiful prey.
Buffy cracks one eye open ‘cause she can feel me still loomin’ over her.
“I think you killed me.”
“Not yet, but I can try durin’ round two.”
She laughs. “You’d do that to me?” Cue fake hurt look. “You’d kill me?”
Damn, I know she was kiddin’ but that takes me back and I roll off her to the side, just starin’ up at the ceilin’. I can sense she knows she said the wrong thing and doesn’t know how to break the silence.
The fuckin’ frightenin’ thing is I think I’m already killin’ her, just by this accelerated pregnancy thing. Fuck, if the pregnancy is accelerated then what’s the birth gonna be like? The contractions? Damn, that thought frightens the fuck outta me.
Why haven’t I thought of all this before? Before I fuckin’ got her pregnant. I’m such a dumbass! I roll over and stare at the wall, rackin’ my brain to think of a way out of this.
How can I make it so the pregnancy slows down?
I need to find the gang, and not only for a pow-wow session on how we slow B’s pregnancy, but because I’m scared that they’re dead, and I need to know for sure. All the stress can’t be good for B and the baby.
While all this shit’s goin’ around and around in my head on a loop I feel the bed shift, and she’s touchin’ my back like she’s worried I’ll blow any second.
The sigh I let out makes me realize I was holdin’ my breath for quite some time. Damn, I just sounded like Giles there.
Giles.
“Faith, will you please turn off that infernal racket!”
“Don’t get the G-string in a bunch, G.” I say as I turn down the stereo. “I was only showin’ Sidestep here what real music was.”
“That’s the lamest version of my name you’ve managed to come up with so far. Faithless.”
“Oh, I have ‘faith’ alright.” I smirk at Satsu.
“Yeah?” She rises to the challenge.
“Yeah. And ya know who else has ‘faith’?”
She narrows her eyes at me, and I can just see the daggers shootin’ out.
“Buffy.” She spits out.
“Yep,” I put my fingers up to my mouth makin’ a V “Every night.” I stick my tongue through ‘em and I wiggle it while simultaneously wigglin’ the brows.
“Oh, Good Lord!” Giles says and huffs off to the kitchen. Probably gonna put on some tea to calm his granny nerves.
“Well, since it’s you she’s getting every night, I’d say she was getting the short end of the stick. Your tongue is probably not 100%, yet.”
I laugh, “Don’t you worry, Sattzy, I could make a bow out of a rubber tree plant with this tongue.” I’m stickin’ it out and pointin’ at it with both hands, illustratin’ how far I can stick it out. Heh. And in.
Giles is comin’ in the room so she doesn’t make the snide ass comment she was about to make, he doesn’t break stride as he walks right up to me and grabs a hold of my tongue. Fuck dude, that fuckin’ HURTS!
“Gllls!”
“Faith, I’m only going to tell you this once, Satsu, you’ll do well to stop snickering and listen.” He brings up his other hand and presses the button on the switch blade he’s holdin’. My eyes go wide at the blade, ‘cause it looks fuckin’ sharp, I stop strugglin’. “We’ve got a serious mission coming up in the next few days, and while I like a bit of letting off steam, I will not tolerate this silly posturing over who can best use their tongue on Buffy.”
He’s fuckin’ DEAD when he lets me go!! Right now my tongue is still healin’ from the number Buffy’s punch did on it, and I can’t take any chances to try and pull myself away, it could rip right the fuck out.
“Now, since I have the proverbial cat by the tongue so to speak, allow me to lay down some ground rules.”
These better be quick, G-man, and you better be quicker, ‘cause I’m gettin’ that knife and guttin’ you when you let go.
“One, no more talk about who is better in bed with Buffy. She’s like a daughter to me, and no father can stand to hear what their daughter gets up to in her bed. Two, no postulation on who’s the better slayer, you both have a lot to learn and you can learn a lot from each other if you’d just shut up and listen to each other. Three, we all share ideas and thoughts, but keep the snarky ones to yourself, or at least not while you are researching, in the field, or in my presence. And last but certainly not least, while I cannot make you play more acceptable music, I shall ask you to play it at a less grating-on-my-nerves level.”
Ok, now let my tongue go, fucker, you have a date with my fists.
“Satsu, your assistance is required over here, please.”
Huh?
“What do you want me to do?” She’s startled.
“Hold her arms at her sides.”
“How?” She sounds scared, and she should be.
Giles sighs, “Stand behind her and use Klondusky’s hold.”
“What?!”
“A hold used in grappling.”
“A what now?”
“Oh for heaven’s sake! A bear hug!”
“Why didn’t you say that in the first place?”
My eyes are so fuckin’ tryin’ to bore a whole through this imperialistic bastard’s head, it’s not funny. If I had some kinda death ray powers he’d be melted right down to his fuckin’ boringly stylish wingtips.
Satsu gets a really good hold on me. Better than I thought she would, so I have to struggle harder than I thought to try to break it. Shit, I’m gettin’ tired.
Giles let’s go of my tongue and jumps back.
“You…” I spit on the ground. “Better…fuckin…pray…your…hands…were…clean.”
“I just washed them.”
“And…you…better…fuckin’…run!”
“No, no running, Faith. That would lead to calling, and calling would lead to talking, and you know who the first person I’d tell that a certain slayer was trying to kill me?”
Fuck face! He’s threatening me with callin’ B and tellin’ her I’ve become a murderous bitch. Again.
Try as I fuckin’ might, I can’t break this bitch’s hold, she’s too fuckin’ strong. It makes me frustrated, and I feel like I’m about to bawl.
That makes me even more mad, and frustrated and then I can’t help it, the tears just run down my face.
“Satsu, you may let her go.”
“Are you sure?” Her voice is strained.
“Absolutely.” Giles still has that eerily calm voice he’s been usin’ this whole time.
She hugs me tighter for a few moments, probably tryin’ to figure out how she’s gonna get away without dyin’.
“I said, let her go!” That makes me jump a little and for some reason my anger dissolves, and it’s pourin’ out of my eyes.
Satsu does as she’s told and backs away quickly.
I don’t know why, but I just stand there cryin’ silently.
“Satsu, will you please leave us alone now?”
“Sure.” She says that without any of the smartassedness we’ve been throwin’ back and forth in the past day and a half since comin’ to London.
I hear her leave the room and Giles steps closer to me.
“I’m sorry for doing that, Faith.”
“You better have a damn good reason, G-man.” I wipe my mouth and my eyes with my sleeve. He gives me his handkerchief. I should just keep one of these for myself, but I’m not stuffy and British, so I don’t.
“I needed to see if Satsu could follow orders, in the face of sheer terror, against her better judgment and instinct for survival.”
“By threatenin’ my lesbianhood?”
“Your what?”
I step up to him and faster than he can squeal like a girl, I have his switch blade in one hand, and his nuts in the other.
“If I said I was gonna chop this off, what would you do?” I pull, slightly squeezin’.
“I…uhhh…see your…point.” His voice goes higher as I squeeze tighter.
Fuck it. Lettin’ go of his package I toss the knife in the air and he catches it unstealth-like.
“Don’t use me as your guinea pig again.” I say as I walk outta the room. “Or you’ll be a eunuch.”
“Yes, of course.” He says quietly.
After washin’ my face and brushin’ my teeth and checkin’ that my tongue didn’t suffer any damage, I go into the room Satsu and I are sharin’. She’s lookin’ scared and sorry.
“So, you wanna spar later or somethin’?” I say as I flop down into the worn leather arm chair near my bed, proppin’ my feet up on the table next to it.
“Umm, I. Uhhh.”
“Yes, or no?”
“I dunno.”
“Look, Strunze, I’m not gonna end you, what happened down there wasn’t your fault. Giles wanted to see if I was gonna go off the deep end, and if you were gonna shit your Hello Kittys. He’s a clever fuck, and that may one day get him killed. But I love him and it’s gonna take more than him threatenin’ to take my tongue off for me to want to kill him and you over it.”
Her shoulders relax and her eyebrow goes up in a smirk. I can see what Buffy saw in her.
Me.
“What’s with the smirk?”
“Well, I was just gonna offer…”
“Oral? Fuck no, Buffy would kill me, and then slit your throat with my collar bone.” I hold in the laugh that visual brings to her face. “’Sides, I don’t do shit like that anymore. It’s just me and Buffy from here on out.”
“That’s good to hear, but I was just gonna offer to be your stand in…ya know, if you need a tongue helper.”
“Ohhhh, still with the smartass, huh?”
“I said I needed to learn from the best.” She winks.
I jump up suddenly and land squarely on my feet, she had walked towards me so we’re standin’ nose to nose. My face breaks out in a grin and I hug her to me.
“And I’ll teach you everything I know.”
“Everything?” The suggestiveness in that question is not lost on me.
“No, not everything, well at least not in the physical sense, I can tell you how to make a girl come for ten minutes straight.” I wink at her. “But you’ll have to go practice on someone else.”
“How about I tell you about the time I made Buffy come…”
I reach up and hold her tongue. “You’d best not finish that sentence if you don’t wanna know what it’s like to have your tongue sewed back on.” I let go of her and she laughs.
“Oh, this is gonna be fun!”
Yeah, it is!
Me and my new buddy, Satellite.
An hour later and me and G are goin’ over some last minute plans. Satsu’s gone to pick up somethin’ for us to eat. It’s her first mission, she better not fail ‘cause I’m fuckin’ starvin’!
“I’m really sorry about earlier, Faith.”
“I get why you did it, G.” I point to his crotch. “My threat on your family jewels still stands if you try it again, though.”
He laughs nervously and then clears his throat. “May I ask what the tears were about?”
I sigh, dunno if I wanna share that, but I don’t wanna lie to him. He’s been really good to me these last months, and I have a feelin’ things are just gonna get better for us in the future.
“I…just… felt helpless I guess. And like I’d done somethin’ wrong. Like really wrong, to get that kind of anger from you.” I shrug my shoulders.
“What did it make you feel?”
He’s tryin’ to shrink me again, and I hate it, but somehow I let him every time, ‘cause I always end up feelin’ better about myself and everything else.
“It felt like when I was four and clutchin’ my teddy bear while my mother screamed in my face that I was a no good whore.”
His breathin’ sounds fucked up and he takes a few minutes longer then I thought it would to respond.
“You know that’s not true though, don’t you?”
I shrug again.
“Surely by now, you know you matter, Faith. Yes?”
My sigh is long and deep and I lay my head on my arms restin’ on the table.
Giles keeps goin’ in his soothin’ voice.
“There are some things in this life that simply don’t matter, sentiments like that about you are one of them. You’re what matters, Faith. You and your wonderful sense of humor, your love for Buffy, her love for you, and your sense of duty and honor. They’re what matter, not the miss-spoken words of a drunken mother who was so scared to have a child who loved her, that she had to make her hate her.”
Fuck, that’s exactly what Ma was doin’. Pushin’ me away before I walked away on my own. Shit, she and I were a lot alike. I just hope if I have any kids that I don’t fuck ‘em up like that.
“You forgot somethin’ else that matters, G.”
“Yes?”
I lift my head up and startle him by huggin’ the fuckin’ stuffin’ out of him. “You matter to me, Giles. You’re so much more than I ever deserved.”
His voice comes out strained, like he can’t breathe, “Nonsense, Faith. You’re very wor-thy. Uhhh…a little less pressure, perhaps?”
Oops! I loosen my hold.
“Thank you.” He sounds relieved.
“No, thank you, G-man.”
“You’re very welcome, anytime.” He fixes his glasses on his face and pulls the map closer to us. “Now, where were we?”
I love this stuffy British bastard, and if anyone tries to mess with him they’re gettin’ their throat cut so bad they’ll look like a fuckin’ bobblehead.
*****Damn, that seems like so long ago, longer than the two years it actually was, that’s for sure.
“Faith, honey, what’re you thinking about? And don’t you dare say ‘nothin’.”
That makes me chuckle, everybody loves to do my voice. They suck!
I’m layin’ here, listenin’ to the happenin’s and goin’s on in Buffy’s stomach. It sounds like the kid’s havin’ a party. She places a hand in my hair and rubs my scalp soothingly, every so often she lightly scratches it and it makes me wanna do the dog leg reaction, ‘cause it’s funny. So I do. Heh.
She laughs and I can hear it through her belly. Her motherlovin’, ever growin’, big and beautiful belly. Well, it’s not hugely big, but I’d say she’s a coupla more weeks pregnant than when I first got here this afternoon. Shit, I shouldn’t leave her like this. But I gotta be out by midnight, ‘cause that’s when I told Satsu and the others I’d meet ‘em in the control room.
Satsu knows from our time in London it’s best not to try to disturb me before that, so I’m not worried about her not findin’ me in my room. She almost lost part of her ear for her troubles. But that’s a story for a different day.
“So, what were you thinking?”
“About how to find the gang, and the fact that I wish I had Giles here to tell me what to do.”
“I know, I was just thinking the same thing.”
I lift my head and kiss her belly. I whisper some lovin’ things to it, ‘cause who knows if the kid has ears yet or not, Buffy could be carryin’ low and not really showin’ and the next time we make love, the kid could be smackin’ me on the nose tellin’ me to get out of its way.
Man, my brain is so fucked up.
Buffy whispers her love to me and I walk my lips up her body, endin’ in the sweetest, most lovin’ kiss I’ve ever gotten in my life.
She just keeps blowin’ me away, every time we’re together. I never knew love like this existed.
After we make out for a while, I settle in behind her, she said she feels more comfortable layin’ on her side, somethin’ about it relievin’ the pressure the baby’s puttin’ on her organs, and the blood flowin’ better.
Whatever she needs to feel better, she’ll let me know and I’ll help her find it or work it out myself, ‘cause this kid’s not gonna be a burden on its mommy before it’s even born.
And there’s that line of thinkin’ that I have to stop before I start hatin’ the kid for Buffy’s swollen feet.
She’s tracin’ patterns on the arm I have draped over her, holdin’ her stomach. I try not to tickle her by movin’ my hand too much, ‘cause she’s gettin’ more ticklish. Another thing I never even knew was possible.
“So you’re going back in there as soon as you get back?”
“Yep, we’re waitin’ for nightfall and then goin’ in, probably about two am, it seemed a good hour the last time.”
She nods, “Sounds good.”
“Mmmhmm.” I kiss her shoulder and neck again, breathin’ in her scent, ‘cause who knows when we can be together like this for a while.
“You know what Giles would say?”
“More to the left?”
“Shut up, perv! That’s so ick!” She slaps my arm, but she’s laughin’ and it makes me laugh, too. “No,” She says when she gets a hold of herself. “He’d say to go back to the beginning.”
“Where? Sunnydale? It’s a crater, Buffy.”
“No…”
“Scotland?”
“No! Would you let me talk? He’d say to go back to where things started going freaky.”
“Uh, for me that was childbirth, B. You’re gonna have to get more specific than that.”
She sighs, “I mean when stuff, in the last two weeks, was unexplainable.”
“Again, more specific.”
She lets out that little Buffy growl that I’ve come to know means to just shut the fuck up and let her talk or get bit.
“I think you need to search the rooms we stayed at in Boston, for clues about Vi and Rona.”
Why didn’t she just say that?! But I don’t ask her that, ‘cause I’m learnin’. Like a good puppy.
“We’ll make an excursion right after we do the rest of the floors of the Academy.”
“I’ll make a few calls, try to reserve those same rooms.”
“We’ve still got Vi and Rona’s on a retainer, didn’t want the cops askin’ questions about the people that were in there.”
“Good.” She sounds excited. “You know what I’m thinking?”
Oh fuck, here we go.
“Yes, and I don’t think it’s wise.”
“But you’ll let me because you love me.”
“Is this about sex?”
“You’re such a perv!”
Goddamn, how do I get her from not wantin’ to search the rooms without her kickin’ my ass out?
I’m gonna need to call in the big guns for this.
