Chapter 20: Let the Side Show Begin
Let the side show begin,
Hurry, hurry, step right on in,
Can't afford to pass it by,
Guaranteed to make you cry.
~Side Show by Blue Magic
I'm in the kitchen makin' pancakes, eggs, bacon, sausage, those no meat things Will likes to eat, and biscuits. My Gee Gee is busy cuttin' up fruit for the fruit salad.
Buffy comes in with her wet hair in a towel and lookin' all fine in her robe.
She's definitely got a glow about her. And no, we didn't do the havin' kids spell so she's not pregnant, she just looks so happy. She says hello to my grandmother and gives her a kiss. Then comes up behind me at the stove and wraps her arms around me.
"Morning sweetheart, you cooking to feed an army?"
"Yeah, don't you remember? We got a few slayers comin' in this morning, to help us with the plan."
"Is Giles picking them up at the airport?"
"No they're teleportin' in, as soon as they get their lazy asses outta bed."
"Cool, is Dawn here?
"Nope, she was up and out early, she's gotta go strategize and stuff, she's at the school."
"Do you need any help, honey?"
"You can go help Gee Gee with the fruit," I turn around in her arms and lean in for a kiss. "You can ball a melon." I say with an eyebrow wiggle once the kiss is over.
She rolls her eyes at me but I know she loves my innuendos. "Oh, that has to be the lamest one ever!!"
My grandmother laughs.
"Gee Gee appreciates it, don't you Gee?"
"Yes, and I'm sure you're guests will appreciate you not burning the pancakes, cara."
I sniff the air, "Oh SHIT!!" I jump back around and flip the pancakes before they're black.
"Faith,"
"Yeah, yeah, I know Gee, language. Sorry."
"No, that's not it, why is there a woman out on your ledge?"
I look out on the balcony and Rona's crouchin' down. I can see a couple of other girls crouchin' as well. B runs to the window and opens it. I shut the heat off on the stove and get the pancakes safely onto a plate.
B's helpin' Rona in and they're saying hello and all.
"What the hell happened?!"
"Good to see you too, Faith."
"Sorry, but what the hell, Rona?! We're supposed to be doin' it this way so no one can see you comin' in. Do you think you were spotted?"
"No, but besides, when are you guys ever normal? They won't think anything of it."
"Rona, I know you're one of the best we have, but we don't need this shit goin' wrong. If one thing goes wrong, one of us could die, that means you, too!"
"Faith, sweety, please calm down, I'm sure everything's ok, just like Rona said. There've been weirder things than that happening here all the time." Buffy puts her hand on my back and smoothes it over my tense muscles. "Besides I'm sure there's some perfectly logical explanation as to why Rona and her guests tried to put us in danger." Buffy narrows her eye at Rona. Ha! That's my girl!
Not so out of the shit now, are ya Rona?
I laugh at Rona and extend my hand out to her for a shake.
"Thanks for volunteerin' to help us, and it's good to see you, Bone."
"Bone?" Buffy asks.
"Don't get her started, Buffy. I don't want to have to beat her down in front of you." She smirks at me and pulls me in for a hug. "I understand congratulations are in order," She whispers in my ear and I nod. "'Bout time you made an honest woman out of Buffy."
B's all smiles.
I pull back and look at Rona, "Who're you kiddin'? You're the one who told me to ‘F her and forget her'." I wink at her and I see Buffy's happy face goes to one of anger in a second. She's lookin' like she's gonna pop Rona's head with her eyes again.
"Oh, don't you dare!! She's just trying to get me in trouble, Buffy. I told her she needed to marry you like a year ago."
"Well, I'll bet if she keeps kidding around like that our marriage won't be worth the paper it's not printed on." She smiles at me evilly.
Oh shit. She's right, we're not legal, so I better fuckin' keep my mouth shut.
"Hey, why don't we all get cozy around the table and eat breakfast. I haven't introduced you ladies to my grandmother, yet, have I?"
I go about tryin' to distract B from her thoughts, and we all get acquainted.
The two girls with Rona, Sandy and Darcy, are doubles as well, they're here just in case we need backups. Rona's gonna be the main Faith double. She knows a lot about me because of the time we spent in North Africa trackin' some really hard to kill demons last year and she's one hell of a slayer.
I ask her why they ended up out on the balcony and she says there was a younger wicca that performed the teleport spell.
"What the hell?! Will knows how important this is, why would she let a newb do it?!"
"She's got a lot on her plate right now."
I don't want to let the thoughts out that are going through my head when she says that, and I have to bite my tongue.
When we're done eatin' our guests, do the dishes, they don't let me get up.
"Please, Faith. Don't get up, we'll do the dishes, it's the least we could do for a breakfast so awesome." Sandy says and Darcy agrees.
"Well, ok I guess, feels weird though."
Buffy goes to get dressed, and Rona pulls me off to the side. "Hey, really, I'm so happy for you two." She gives me a quick hug.
"Thanks,"
"It's not going to be easy for the next few weeks, you know that don't you?"
"Yeah, I know." But I'd rather not.
"Willow's pretty broken up right now. I think she might need someone to go over there. I didn't want to say anything in front of the others."
"She's feelin' really guilty about Kelly isn't she?"
Rona nods.
"I should go talk to her."
"No, you should let Buffy. It would be perfect. Buffy goes over there, you go to the facility to see Ken, then the whole show starts."
"Yeah," I laugh a bit bitterly. "Step right up, see the saddest show in town for only 50 cents." I mutter.
"Huh?"
"Nothin'" Time to stop thinkin' of my shitty childhood and get on with it.
I go over to my grandmother and whisper a few words to her. This will be a goodbye for us, for now. She's gonna be picked up by Giles in a few minutes to go back to Boston.
"You take care of yourself and Buffy, cara mia. Never forget, your Gee Gee loves you."
"I won't ever forget that, Gee." I give her a kiss on her hands, and then look into her eyes. "If it weren't for you, none of this would be possible. Thank you for," For not lettin' my mom abort me I start to say, but I don't wanna start fuckin' bawlin' right now. I feel like I'd never stop. "Everything."
"You're welcome, I'm so glad I got to be a part of your wedding, it was beautiful. I've never been to a sweeter, more beautiful, more sincere ceremony, and to think it only cost you the flowers and the food. Some people spend millions for words and sentiments that mean nothing to them. What you and Buffy have is something that will never be broken, not even in hardship, never forget that you were meant for each other."
"I won't, I promise you, I never will." I think of somethin' that makes me chuckle.
"What's got you amused, Bella?"
"Aunt Dee is gonna be so pissed when she finds out that she missed our weddin'!"
"Deborah has caused me enough grief in my life to not begrudge me witnessing this. At least she better not; I'll give her a smack to the head she'll never forget!"
"Don't hurt your hand, Gee. She's the testa dura of the family."
"Testa dura is right! Did I tell you about the time she took off all her clothes and climbed a tree with her friend Silvio?"
I crack up. "No! When?"
"She was five and thought that she should be a free spirit. It took me four hours to get her to come down, nothing would make her change her mind. Your uncles even threatened to throw out all her toys if she didn't come down and still she kept insisting she wasn't coming down. Even poor Silvio couldn't stay up there that long, he had just drank a half a pitcher of Kool-aid and had to make pee pee."
Oh, man. I'm never lettin' Aunt Dee live this one down!!!!
"What did you do to get her to come down?"
"Ordered a sausage and mushroom pizza with extra onions. I sat at the picnic table eating it. She was down before I got to the second bite."
"Damn, she loves that kinda pizza! I can't believe she ate it at that age though. I was all about the cheese when I was five."
"Your grandfather says it was because I ate it when I was pregnant for her. It was all I ever craved. Well, that and lemons but a good dose of vitamin C every morning helped with that."
"That's a great story, Gee Gee. Thanks for sharin' that."
"Yes, and I'll bet you'll be telling your Aunt I told you that the second she calls here."
"Oh, I'm not gonna wait for her to call me. I'm callin' now!"
She laughs and pinches me.
"You'll have kids, won't you?" Her look is serious.
"'Course, dunno when, but we've been talkin' about it."
"Good, talking about it is good. Making them is better." She winks at me and I swallow my gum.
"Giulia Giuseppina D'Allesio Fitzpatrick!" I scold her. "You go straight to your room!!"
She winks at me, "You forgot ‘Alicia'. Speaking of my room, help me up, I do need to go there. Rupert will be here soon and I have to collect my things."
"Don't go carryin' your suitcases out, me and Buffy will do that. Or me and Giles, B's gotta take care of somethin'."
"Let me go say my goodbyes to her now then. You help your friends put away the dishes, they've got the pans all mescolato." She gestures with her hands to illustrate ‘mixed'.
I give her a kiss and a hug, "I'll come see you soon."
"You better." She winks and gives my cheek one last pinch. "Come Bella. ‘How Beautiful' eh?" She smiles a sad smile at me. "You remember when your grandfather would say that?" She laughs and looks about thirty years younger remembering my grandfather's stunted Italian, with his Boston accent.
"Comay Beller." I nail his voice and her eyes widen.
"Matty was something, huh?" She smiles fondly.
"He was great." I start to tear up, my grandpa was really a great guy. I'm sorry he died before I got to tell him that one last time. "Just like you're the greatest woman I've ever known, he was the greatest man."
"Oh, I think you've got a great one in the room there. And as for the man, well Mr. Giles is a very great man. Even your Xander, he's a bit unsure of himself, but he's definitely someone to have on your side."
Don't I freakin' know it.
"Andrew, now he might seem a little out there, but mark my words, he's going places that one."
Yeah, to the freakin' nut house.
"Don't look like you're Gee Gee's crazy, I have an eye for these things."
"What about Dawn?" I test her.
"She's the mother of you all, you might think it's Willow, but Dawn is a shrewd one, she acts like she's the little sister, but she's constantly guiding you to behave the way she thinks you should. And most of the time she's right. So listen to her."
"And Willow?"
"She's going through some troubled times, she might try to keep a brave face, but she's hurting, you're going to make it right though, no?"
"I'll do everything in my power to do just that." I say sincerely.
"Such a good girl. Give me another kiss and then go help the girls."
"I love you, Gee Gee."
"I love you too, Bella."
As I watch her go in to see Buffy, I get a really good feelin'.
We're gonna be ok.
"NO, IT'S NOT OK, BUFFY!! YOU'VE GONE TO SEE HER THREE TIMES THIS WEEK!!!!!!!"
"Faith, keep your voice down, the neighbors will hear!"
"I DON'T CARE! IF THEY DON'T WANT TO HEAR THAT MY GIRLFRIEND IS SEEIN' SOMEONE I'VE TOLD HER NOT TO SEE, AGAIN, THEN THEY CAN FUCK OFF!"
"Faith, I'm not going to tell you again! If you don't keep it down, I'm going to Willow's."
"YEAH, WHY NOT GO?! THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT, ISN'T IT?! WELL FUCK OFF THEN TOO!!!"
Damn, Rona's got a set of pipes on her. Me and Will are at her apartment listenin' in on the bug we planted. They're really doin' a good job.
And for the record, I sound like a total bitch when I'm mad. Good thing I don't listen to myself, ‘cause I'd be kickin' my own ass all the time.
"I can't talk to you when you're like this, Faith! Dawn was right, you're not worth me getting upset over. That's just great, isn't it? My sister comes back from England after you're in a coma and all she wants to do is help out and what do you do? You insult her taste in men, and everything she has worked so hard for. You even told her she wasn't real. TWICE!!"
"I told you to pack your shit and go, how much clearer do I have to be?!"
"No, you go!! This was my place before you came here!!"
Oh shit, that's her first slip up, she's tryin' to recover.
"Look how you've got me all mixed up! But you know what?! I found this place, I picked out the colors and I bought the bed spread that matches it perfectly, so you get the fuck out, not me!!!"
Nice recovery, she did do all those things. Her old apartment was the one where we'd have to find street parking, that was hers before it became ours, this one she found but we moved into it together.
"I'm going to fuckin' France in a week! You can stay here or go to Willow's. I'm not fuckin' leavin', until I leave!!"
"FINE!!"
"FINE!!"
"FINE!!"
"FUCKIN' FINE!!!!!"
"FUCK YOU!!!"
I hear a door slam and I think she just cracked the frame. She's probably blushin' with the fact she knows Will and I heard that.
She dials her cellphone.
Ken's phone that I have in my hand starts ringin', "Hello?" Damn, my voice is Ken's, sounds freakin' weird.
"Hey, it's me. Can I come over?"
"Now's not a good time."
"But, she's being so horrible!! I don't know if I'm safe here."
"I'm just getting some of my things and I'm going to my parents place on 60th and Lexington. You can meet me there."
"Ok, thanks Ken. I really appreciate it." She starts cryin'.
"Don't worry, Buffy. I know how it feels to be tossed out."
Will looks at me and I just realized how that sounds. I shake my head at her not to start cryin' and she holds herself in check.
"Poor thing, here I am blubbing about my problems and there you are going through almost the same thing. Probably without the screaming though."
"Yeah, Will can be a screamer, that's for sure." I wiggle Ken's brows. "But not when it comes to me getting out. I think she's really relieved. Did you know her new girlfriend moved in already?" I say I'm sorry to Will with my eyes. She really shouldn't be here when I do this, but she wanted to be.
"I know, I'm sorry, baby. Ummm I mean Ken. Uhhh I have to go pack. I'll meet you at your parent's place?"
"Sure, I'll be there in an hour. Baby." God that just sucks, but I guess it's believable.
She sounds excited that I added that on the end, "Wonderful! Will your parents be home?"
"Nah, they own it but they don't stay there. My sister usually lives there but she's in Brazil right now."
"Oh, ok. I'll see you soon. Thanks again, Ken."
"You're welcome, Buffy. Anytime."
"Bye." Buffy says with a smile in her voice. Kinda reminds me of when we were first goin' out, she'd be all coy and shy.
"Bye, B-uffy." Damn! I hope they didn't fuckin' pick up on that.
Will makes it so whoever's listenin' in doesn't hear our real conversation.
"You ok, Red?"
"Yeah" she says with a shaky voice.
"You shouldn't listen in to stuff like that, but it's gotta be done." I pull her closer to me and we sit in silence.
After a while she tells me I have to get going, Buffy's gonna be at Ken's parents' place.
"You'll be ok?"
"I will."
"Something you wanna talk about?"
"Do you think Ken's alive?"
"I hope so, Will. I promise you that we'll find out one way or the other."
"I can't believe I just wrote her off like that."
"Will, you and her were havin' problems for a year, you didn't just ‘write her off'. Most people wouldn't put up with shit like that for that long."
"I know, but..."
"Will, no buts, don't beat yourself up over it. We've got a mission here, and I know it's not the most important thing in the world, but it does kinda mean life or death, so you'll need to be focused. Just concentrate on trying to help Ken and find out what's going on here. Is that ok?"
She puts on the resolve face, "Yeah, that's ok! Let's do this!!"
"There's my girl," I smile at her.
I pull up in the cab and B's standin' by Ken's buildin' with a couple of bags.
"Sorry, Willow wanted to ‘talk' some more."
"Was it with a lot of yelling this time?"
"Yeah, I didn't realize her face could match her hair. She wasn't too happy that I'm letting you stay with me."
"What does she care? She's the one that threw you out, didn't she?"
"Yeah, but you're her best friend, and she's kinda jealous."
"Of what?"
I lean in and quirk an eyebrow, she gets a mischievous smile on her face and closes the gap.
"Of that," I say when we break for air.
Fuck, Buffy just kissed ‘Kennedy'!!!! I know this is not the real Ken and all, but that shit with Ken bothered me so much that I still can't stand the thought of them together. Well, I can't stand the thought of B with anyone else anyway, so it's natural that I'd want to strangle Ken. What's not natural is that I'm thinkin' of throwin' myself in front of a cab to get back at Ken for just kissin' B.
I'm one messed up chick.
"Shall we?" B gestures towards the door.
I nod and shoulder my bag, then I grab hers from her, don't need my new bride carryin' anything. Who knew Ken could be so chivalrous?
Once we're inside I do the spell Will taught me, no words are needed, only a few hand gestures and suddenly we see two glowing areas, one is a lamp by the couch, and another is the phone. We're bugged here, too. They're fuckin' good these assholes.
We go through the rest of the apartment and find four more, one in the kitchen, one in the bedroom, of course the perverts put it right above the bed this time, Buffy's been just ramblin' on about her break up with Faith this whole time, you'd never know that we were actually lookin' for bugs if you were listenin' in. She's fuckin' wonderful.
I get her in front of the bed, and notice that the bug they have above the bed looks different, fuck it's glowin' red, Will says that means it's got video, that changes things. Gotta make this look authentic, not just sound it.
I pull her to me and whisper what I've found out about the bug in her ear, she tenses up but immediately plays it off like I'm sayin' some nasty shit about wantin' to fuck her or somethin'. She pulls back slightly and nods at me to let me know she gets it, we have to make this affair look real. She reaches for my shirt and undoes the buttons.
Damn, there's two things that fuckin' make me wanna yark, one is B's about to fuck Kennedy and the other is some fuckin' assholes are watchin' in. That means they can see B's tits and ass and her pussy, too. That thought makes me nuts, because the tits and ass (minus the hole), anyone on a beach in the French Riviera would see, I mean when in Rome right? But the pussy, that's just for me, I stop her before she gets her panties off. She had pushed me back on the bed and was doin' a strip tease for ‘Ken'.
"Leave them on, it's hotter that way. Oh, and leave the socks on, too." I wink. "Faith's one lucky bitch, you know that?"
"Was one lucky bitch." She glares. "Now you are," She smirks.
I was about to say ‘Fuckin' A!', but Ken doesn't say stuff like that. She's tough and all but doesn't curse as much as me. She was always gettin' after me about that.
"You're not lying." I gesture with my head, "Come here, I wanna feel you."
She slowly makes her way over. I pull her close to me and I can see she's got her eyes shut tight, she doesn't want this visual either. Damn, I wonder if there's a spell Red can put on B to make her see me through the glamour. We'll have to think about that one, could be too confusin' if we were together with Rona, but wait, if B can see that it's me through the Ken glamour then she could see it's Rona through the Faith glamour. That might even be safer since we don't know what the government, or whoever's behind this shit, can pull.
Damn, I'm so fuckin' clever for my own good sometimes.
I pull my boots and socks off, then pull my pants off and slide up the bed, pullin' her with me and sheildin' most of her nakedness from the camera, they'd be able to see her ass a bit, but I'm gropin' that too, so they mostly see my hands on it. I get us under the covers.
It's been about three hours and we're still goin' at it hot and heavy. Or that's what they think, we're really just actin' because we don't wanna be tired out. Gotta keep on guard at all times, never know what's gonna happen.
I did give B a happy while I was ducked under the covers though, I couldn't fuckin' resist, I pulled her panties aside and tongued her up until she came. That was pretty nice. Other than that it's all been fake and she still hasn't really looked at me. She keeps her eyes shut and she's movin' her head from side to side like she's havin' the most mind blowin' orgasms ever.
I'm kinda jealous for a second before I realize I'm a fuckin' nutcase and she's just actin'.
We end up with our heads goin' the opposite way on the bed, but we're still under the covers, they're kinda just tangled up now, and the comforter is on the floor. I spoon her from behind.
"Wow, that was something else! I never knew you were so hot in bed."
"Faith never said anything?"
"All that asshole ever does is talk about herself and how she's got ‘wicked mad skills' and she's ‘five by five'." I fuckin' have to mentally laugh at Ken's voice sayin' that stuff.
B laughs for us.
"Really? I haven't heard her say ‘five by five' in a while. I never understood that anyway."
I used to say it as a way to not say anything. Easier to just say 'five by five' then 'I'm in love with you Buffy, that's why I'm goin' fuckin' nuts tryin' to get you to notice me.' Or other deep stuff like that I didn't want anyone to know.
"That's because she's crazy. I've never understood why you were with her."
"Me neither." She turns in ‘Ken's' arms and looks at ‘her' with sad eyes, "But that doesn't matter now does it?"
I know this isn't for real, and she's just actin' but my heart apparently doesn't know that, because I feel like someone just stabbed me through it. I have to bite my lip not to tear up. Whoever's watchin' probably thinks I'm bitin' it to be all sexy lookin'.
She leans in and gives me a lovin' kiss. Then pulls back and whispers in my ear, "Oh, god, please let this be over soon."
I pull back and smile like she just told me she loved me, "I feel the same way, Buffy. You have no idea." I lean in and give her another kiss. When we part again, she's got her eyes shut tight, "I know it's sudden and all, but would you mind coming with me to D.C.? I've got some business to take care of down there and I'd like to make it a pleasure trip as well." I wink at her.
Ew, I kinda hate my affair skills. But that's cool, ‘cause I don't plan on usin' ‘em, EVER.
"Sure, that sounds wonderful."
We pretend to have sex for another hour or so. I'm so good at it I should be in porn. But then Buffy'd shoot me and I'd be all dead and junk.
This time around I wanna live, even if it's through shit like this.
