| ACT TWO FADE IN INT. DEAN HOUSE - DAY Willow, Xander, Faith, and Dino watch "Die Hard". Buffy, Giles, Dawn, Elle, Anya, and Kennedy eye the viewers with contempt. GILES This is summarily counterproductive. BUFFY No duh. FAITH Oh oh, here it comes! FAITH/XANDER/DINO (with accents; mimicking the movie) Shoot the glass! All four burst out LAUGHING. The others are frustrated. WILLOW I can't believe this is only my first time. DINO Me neither. Dino snakes his arm around Willow's shoulders on the sofa earning an unseen glare from Kennedy. GILES (to the viewers) Can we please get to the matter at hand? FAITH You mean Spike? We hunt the dog down and put him to sleep--case closed. XANDER (to Faith) Nice job. FAITH Thanks. BUFFY It's not so simple. You know that--but I digress. FAITH Digress all ya want--we just wanna watch the movie. BUFFY Spike is up to something. WILLOW Spike's always up to something. That's what makes him a schemer. KENNEDY Shouldn't be so lax about this WILLOW...he could be looking for you. ANYA Possibly to make you his bitch. For that matter, he may want to enslave us all. That would be strenuously unacceptable. XANDER Unless it was Faith doing the enslaving. ANYA I'm over her! FAITH She's over me. BUFFY Really? DAWN (suspiciously; to Buffy) Why do you wanna know? BUFFY Because...Anya's a pixie. Anya's offended. ELLE Whoa...can't believe she said that out loud. DAWN Maybe Anya's rubbing off on her. ANYA Maybe Faith is. DINO Maybe I'd like to. That earns a glare from Faith and a GIGGLE from Willow. GILES Maybe we should gain a semblance of perspective and realize how far off-track this meeting has gotten. XANDER What meeting? Ohhh, right. Maybe we should start over. (exuberant) Hey guys, what's up? Some CHUCKLES, GROANS, and Giles removes his glasses. CUT TO: INT. DRUSILLA'S LITTLE HOUSE - DAY Spike paces the room. The place looks the same except for the entire lack of dolls. SPIKE Bloody sensational. I'm gonna make her sensationally bloody--that's what I'm gonna do. Oh yeah, the bint's getting plastered like the punks in Northern Ireland. The door CREAKS open. Spike's elated. SPIKE Thank the bleedin' lord Dru! Where ya been? I miss-- Spike stops when ANGEL struts in. Spike's face falls. SPIKE Fuck you, this is not happening. ANGEL No hug? SPIKE I'd rather swim naked in raw sewage. But the sewage is real...not necessarily the case with you. ANGEL Smiles and candy canes aren't on the agenda I assume. SPIKE That corporeal bit ain't helping the brainpower department I see. If it's a patsy you're looking for, go to Washington--and stay there. A host of blokes will throw a parade as a send-off. ANGEL Spikey-poo, you don't like me? SPIKE Sure you want to hear my answer? ANGEL No. Would you like to know the whereabouts of your precious Drusilla? (taunting) She's taken up an extracirricular activity. Spike holds a fiery stare at "Angel". CUT TO: INT. SECRET CRYPT - DAY Drusilla places a small dress on a table. DRUSILLA Yes, you'll fit her perfectly. A dress worthy of such a special girl. Drusilla walks over to a bag and pulls out a make-up case. DRUSILLA Has to look pretty for Mistress. Drusilla walks over to an array of cushions housing a bare doll. Drusilla picks it up and strokes it gently. DRUSILLA So lovely. Won't be long now... CUT TO: INT. SUMMERS BASEMENT - DAY Buffy and Faith spar as Giles takes notes and cools off with a bottle of water. The sparring session consists of rapid-fire, high-intensity exchanges, neither holding back. As they spar: FAITH Where's this energy comin' from B? BUFFY Beating the shit out of you seems to be the best way to communicate with you. FAITH Sure it's not pent up sexual frustration...or is that me? BUFFY I'd say FUCK YOU if I knew you wouldn't throw an innuendo-laden comment back at me. FAITH Tell me this hasn't got your juices flowin' like a friggin' canal. BUFFY I can live without sex--you should try it. FAITH Don't gotta try--I'm with YOU! Buffy lands a hard right and pushes Faith against a wall, smothering her. BUFFY Unload more invective into our relationship--does nothing to increase my sexual desire or decrease my determination to crack open your soul and learn every ounce of who you are. In fact, it serves to create the most interminable bitch on the block. Please Faithy, gimme more--got an itch that needs scratchin'. FAITH You were a clit-tease then--still are. Giles' breath hitches. Faith strikes Buffy in the face and connects with successive blows. Buffy strikes back, but Faith gains the upper hand and ties Buffy up in an embrace-- Buffy's back against her front. Faith's got Buffy's arms locked and leans in to whisper loudly: FAITH Words don't mean shit to a slayer-- not when the adrenaline's flowin', 'cause it ain't any different from the arousal...the rush, the power, the desire to rip into someone, the taste, the headiness...the words are drowned out by our bodies screamin' their urges, beggin' for that release. (MORE) FAITH (CONT'D) The ecstasy B--denyin' its existence, pretendin' it's not there or somethin' else altogether is a fool's play 'cause you can't fool another slayer. You want it-- you need it--I can take you to a place beyond the heaven of your wildest dreams. Silence. Buffy's breathing becomes labored. BUFFY Wow. All I can say is: blah-- blah--blah. Buffy spins free and nails Faith who fights back. They have a lengthy exchange before Faith lands a kick to the midsection, then flips Buffy to the floor. She jumps on Buffy, caging her. They both breathe raggedly, sweat dripping from their skin. Hair respective messes. Their faces barely inches apart. FAITH Try to fuckin' blah this away--BUFFY. Buffy shivers. Faith's lips feather across Buffy's. Suddenly, water hits them sparking their awareness of Giles who holds the water bottle out in front of him. GILES Thought you might do well to cool off. I know I will. Giles pours a bunch of water over his head. He picks up his notebook and stands. GILES Good day ladies. Giles nods and walks out. Buffy and Faith focus on each other again. Faith kisses Buffy lightly, then turns it into a hungry, ravaging kiss. Faith's hand snakes down to Buffy's waist, her fingers roaming over exposed skin. Buffy unlatches her mouth from Faith, gasping for air. BUFFY Don't. FAITH I can sense how you're feelin'...it's okay, I'm right there with you. BUFFY This is far from a good time. FAITH Always a good time with me B. Faith's hand dips into Buffy's pants. BUFFY Not like this. I don't want to. Faith gazes long and hard into Buffy's eyes. Buffy pleads with Faith. Faith SIGHS, removes her hand and rolls off Buffy. FAITH Sorry. BUFFY It's okay. I don't blame you. FAITH (biting) Wanna talk? Is that what you'd prefer--or is this about makin' love? Can never just fuck. BUFFY Both. Why you're apprehensive about either boggles my mind and heart. FAITH I'm sick of the first and got no concept of the second. That help? Buffy rushes to her feet and busts it up the stairs. Faith shuts her eyes. CUT TO: EXT. SUMMERS HOUSE - EVENING Willow heads down the stairs to meet Kennedy. WILLOW Hi. KENNEDY Gee, thanks for the stellar greeting and loving embrace. WILLOW Ditch the melodrama please--you don't wear it well. KENNEDY What's going on with you? WILLOW Me? This seems more like a Kennedy-issue. What's with you Kennedys? Always stirring controversy and promoting dysfunction. KENNEDY What the fuck is that supposed to mean? WILLOW Figure it out yourself. KENNEDY Whatever's gotten into you Willow...do you not wanna be with me anymore? WILLOW Take it to the extreme...God, are you pulling wild theories out of your ass? KENNEDY Characterizations are subjective...you got a thing for Captain America? WILLOW Someone wasn't paying attention when I pointedly remarked my dislike of comic books. KENNEDY (acidly) Dean. Dino. Christopher Columbus jr. I'm thinking he's been sailing to the new world--a.k.a., your pussy. Willow slaps Kennedy. KENNEDY Yum. Admit it, would explain a whole lot--like why I haven't gotten into your pants since you came back. Maybe you're afraid of what my heightened senses will find down there. Willow slaps Kennedy again. WILLOW Want another one? KENNEDY Not if you'd rather be anywhere but here. Willow and Kennedy eye each other for a moment. Willow turns and walks back into the house. Kennedy shakes her head angrily. She takes a few steps down the sidewalk, but stops and looks across the street. Kennedy keeps her sight on the area until a blue dress flashes. Kennedy sprints across the street, but finds nothing and no one. She recklessly surveys the neighborhood--no luck. She's alone. CUT TO: INT. THE BRONZE - NIGHT Xander lounges on a couch opposite Willow and Faith. FAITH Bad boy. XANDER I'm taking that as a compliment even if you didn't mean it to be one. WILLOW When are you gonna have THE TALK? XANDER Eventually. FAITH Evil son of a bitch. I like it. Xander celebrates. WILLOW It's wrong to string her along like that. Sure, we're talking about Anya, but she's got feelings and emotions like the rest of us. Yes, they border on schizophrenic--but no less human. XANDER What is it with people insisting on me being a sycophant romantic? (MORE) XANDER (CONT'D) You laying a guilt-trip on me; Giles trying to endow me with aging wisdom from the 50's or whatever decade he grew up in; Dino and his tale of love lost as if I shouldn't play around with Anya because she might die any minute. Willow's disturbed. XANDER Am I a horny twenty year old? Hell yeah! Does that mean my dick has controlled my approach to romance? FUCK NO. I'm the one who gets a bad rap in this trio even though I would've been perfectly happy spending the rest of my life with you, Buffy, Cordelia, or Anya. Meanwhile, no offense, but I have no idea what you're doing with Kennedy and Buffy used Spike for sport-fucking, so tuck away your pressuring, judgmental nice guy rant for when I really deserve it. Faith's mouth hangs open. Willow sits back and gestures her giving up. Anya walks over and hands Xander a drink. ANYA Here you go sweetheart. Bartender practically needed me to hold his hand. XANDER Thanks. ANYA Wanna dance? Meaningful conversation? Love-making in a public place? XANDER Actually, could you get me some nuts--my tummy's aching to be filled. ANYA Be right back! Anya flies off. Xander grins and turns to Faith. XANDER So what's up with you and Buffy? Faith and Willow exchange a glance. FAITH It's nothin'. XANDER Bull. There's something going on between you two. I don't know...the best analogy I can make is...girl- on-girl porn. FAITH Really hoverin' in a totally different country Xan. XANDER Then what is it? Beat. FAITH Slayer PMS--times two. Xander eyes Faith for a moment, then Willow who smirks and nods in confirmation. Xander smiles nervously before silently getting up and walking away. WILLOW Old reliable. FAITH Yep. CUT TO: INT. SUNNYDALE HIGH, BASEMENT - DAY Dawn and Elle cautiously trek through the creepy area. ELLE There are really ghosts down here? DAWN Why would I lie? ELLE Uh, to freak me out? I'm not a fan of ghosts. DAWN Glad to hear that. ELLE Which part? The freak-out or the disinclination towards ghosts? DAWN If you got friendly with the supernatural, I'd have to stop being friendly with you. ELLE Wouldn't want that. DAWN In case you get scared, don't hesitate to hold on to me for dear life. I won't complain about where your hands end up. ELLE (flustered) Okay. (beat) Did you hear that? DAWN Considering I just learned of YOU hearing something, I'm gonna say no. There's a SNAP. Dawn and Elle halt. ELLE Should I go first? DAWN Heard that. Dawn pats Elle on the arm, spinning her finger. Elle nods, confused. Dawn pulls out a stake. After a moment, she spins around and Elle follows suit. Nothing. VOICE (OS) Boo! Dawn and Elle SCREAM and jump, turning around to find Buffy adorning a death stare. BUFFY Stupid. You are stupid. (to Dawn) You, my sister, are stupid. (to Elle) You are stupid, but not my sister, so I only THINK you're stupid. (MORE) BUFFY (CONT'D) I'm not SAYING you're stupid, but if I were your sister, I'd call you stupid. (to Dawn) Now, I am calling you stupid... (to Elle) ...and I would call you stupid... (to both) ...for a reason. Do you know what that reason is? Dawn and Elle look at each other, thinking it over. They look back to Buffy. DAWN Because showing off my hellmouth skills doesn't promote modesty, the hallmark of a good superhero and a characteristic representative of cool decency? BUFFY Your punishment for coming down here WAS going to be a verbal spanking. That answer gets you grounded for a week. DAWN Of course. BUFFY Are you stupid? ELLE I thought we covered that. BUFFY What are you doing down here? Besides neglecting class. ELLE Secret make-out session. Dawn SWOONS. Buffy narrows her eyes. BUFFY (slowly) Is that true? ELLE (emphatically) No. DAWN (quietly; disappointed) No. (louder) We were just doing some ghost hunting. Buffy shakes her head disapprovingly. BUFFY (to Elle) Can you give us a minute? ELLE No prob. But I'm not going too far. Elle puts distance between herself and the sisters. Buffy moves close to Dawn. BUFFY Dawny, I trust your self-defense abilities--I do...but this is a risk so not worth taking. Especially if your goal is to impress Elle. DAWN Absolutely not! Thought it might help her build fighting skills. Get to know her surroundings so she isn't as vulnerable. BUFFY Commendable. (beat) Have you broached the whole... Buffy gives a "you know..." look. Dawn knows. DAWN Asking about tonight's history homework and admitting I really do wanna come down to the basement during school hours for secret make-out sessions are on different ends of the vocal spectrum. BUFFY It's hard--but sweetie, the pay-off is utopia if she reciprocates. DAWN IF. Buffy rubs Dawn's shoulder compassionately. Dawn peers over at a seemingly oblivious Elle. CUT TO: EXT. GRAVEYARD - NIGHT Buffy, Faith, Willow, and Dino patrol. FAITH This group mentality seems pretty fuckin' misguided. BUFFY Is that code for "I want to be alone in my principles--namely shut up and fuck me!"? DINO Very rewarding principles. BUFFY (to Faith) Say it. FAITH What? BUFFY Just come out with what you really want at this precise moment--to patrol anywhere I'm not. FAITH Always assumin' the dramatic worst. BUFFY Is that a denial? FAITH No, your assumin' was spot on this time. THIS TIME. BUFFY Go kiss your own ass... (muttering) ...unappreciative slutbomb. WILLOW (worried) Uh oh, lovers' quarrel. FAITH Nuh uh Red...can't be a lovers' quarrel without the LOVERS part. Little Miss Priss would rather finger her own pussy than mine. BUFFY Astounding what you'll talk about with so many people around and what you won't with just me. FAITH Let--it--go. I think splittin' up is a good idea. I'll go one way, you three go the other. All in favor? The YEAS have it. BUFFY Leave. Go. Fuck off with your phony majority. Buffy turns her back to Faith. Faith huffs off. Willow and Dino are supremely uncomfortable. WILLOW Buffy? Are you-- BUFFY --going home. I'm tired. Sorry. Before Willow can say anything else, Buffy marches in the opposite direction Faith left. Willow and Dino shuffle around for a few moments. DINO (heroically) Fear not, fair maiden...I shall protect you through and through, out and about, here there and everywhere...and I'll do it with a smile. WILLOW (smiling; quietly) Captain America. DINO What's that? WILLOW Thank you Christopher. DINO Always welcome. (beat) So where's Kennedy tonight? WILLOW Probably courting trouble. CUT TO: EXT. CEMETERY - NIGHT Kennedy sits against a headstone. She SNIFFLES and wipes at her eyes. KENNEDY Pathetic. Vapid town. Deserves to get sucked into hell...happiness for everyone. VOICE (OS) I vehemently agree. Kennedy leaps to her feet and immediately gets into a fighting stance. She sees Drusilla floating towards her. KENNEDY You're that vamp's vamp girlfriend. DRUSILLA Technically. KENNEDY Evasion persuasion. You telling me you and the peroxide punky brewster aren't sharing a bed no more? DRUSILLA If that's what you'd like to hear, then I will say yes. KENNEDY What I want? I want to jam a piece of sharp wood in your chest...then suck what's left into a dustbuster...then shoot the shit into a toilet, press the handle, and-- (singing) --flush goes the ashes. DRUSILLA That would hurt. What did I do to you? KENNEDY Me personally? Nothing. But I'm a soldier on the side of light, so my first inclination is to kill you. You got a history. DRUSILLA You do battle for those mean children who wish ill of myself and Spike. KENNEDY Not FOR them--WITH them. DRUSILLA You are a blasted fool if you truly believe such an outrageous claim. I've seen how they treat you...how your own love has grown disgusted with you. KENNEDY (dangerously) How the fuck would you know anything? Engage in heavy thinking for your answer, 'cause if I don't like it-- DRUSILLA --instead of threatening me for speaking the truth, why don't you open your mind to the reality of your relationship to all and her. I've done that on several occasions in my continuously lengthy existence. KENNEDY I'm not buying this shit. DRUSILLA They'd prefer you die than withstand your presence for mere seconds longer than necessary. None of them like you...and the lone beauty who saw your own unique beauty-- invisible to the ignorance of the rest--is falling in line with their views. She no longer wants you. KENNEDY (shakily) No. She does. DRUSILLA She's roaming the landscape with HIM. Drusilla steps right into Kennedy and strokes her face. Kennedy lets her. Kennedy's shivers. DRUSILLA I'm here and I accept who you are-- a profoundly complex position considering our origins--our rebirths--light and dark...but our differences draw us together. An attraction of good and evil. I want you. KENNEDY Not happening. DRUSILLA She loves you. That's not the problem. She loves you. KENNEDY (hopefully) Really? DRUSILLA I can help you win her back-- permanently. She will reside in your heart and soul for all eternity. KENNEDY I'm intrigued...but keepin' an eye on you. DRUSILLA As well you should my dear. Drusilla CACKLES. Kennedy manages a slight grin. Drusilla runs her fingers over Kennedy's cheek. Kennedy's eyes flutter shut. At that moment, Drusilla vamps out and buries herself in Kennedy's neck. Kennedy GASPS, but that's all. She can't resist substantively, her body convulsing as Drusilla drains her. Finally, Drusilla stops feeding. When she lets go, Kennedy's body plops to the ground. Drusilla licks her lips and incisors. DRUSILLA It's midnight forever--pleasant dreams. END ACT TWO |
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