| ACT THREE FADE IN INT. XANDER'S APARTMENT - MORNING Anya sleepily walks out of the bedroom into the living room. Anya wanders aimlessly as she calls out: ANYA Xander. Xander, breakfast or some reasonable facsimile? Anya takes a good look--no Xander. She plops down on the couch and sadly resigns herself to being alone. CUT TO: EXT. SUMMERS HOUSE - MORNING Dino loads bags into the trunk of a car. Willow carries another to the car with Buffy nearby watching. WILLOW (to Dino) Could you help me with this one-- it's extraordinarily heavy. DINO No problem Dino picks the bag up easily and places it in the trunk, bending over marginally. WILLOW Really stick it in there. Dino does and bends over a little more. Willow positions herself directly behind Dino and gives a humping motion causing Buffy's eyes to widen and then choke on heavy laughter. She runs inside. Dino catches what Buffy does and stands straight up, Willow ceasing her activity. DINO What's with her? WILLOW Stress. She has no concept of the proper way to deal with it. She prefers hysterical running as opposed to drugs. DINO Her loss. WILLOW You know, I couldn't help but admire your butt. Most people rave about firm and tight--but, there's a notable enjoyability in having some meat to grab onto. DINO Well that's--remarkably weird and out-of-the-blue...but considering I don't get complimented on my butt often--or ever--I'll say a grateful thank you. WILLOW Pleasure's mine. DINO And I totally agree on the body- meat desirability. I like my women to have a little on them--not too much--enough to savor. To me, firm and lean are vegetarian selections. It's the meat carriers-- Dino grabs a handful of Willow's ass. DINO --That are prime for the carnivores to devour with every fiber in their being. That's the stuff. Willow nods emphatically. She keeps nodding as Dino keeps his hand on her ass. WILLOW It might be time to let go. DINO (letting go) Yeah. Sorry. WILLOW Understandable--I know what I've got. DINO Could you not tell Kennedy? I mean, I could take her down easily...just that, well, hell hath no fury like a woman scorned...only, in the 21st century, it's more like hell hath no fury like a raging lesbian scorned. WILLOW A thesis I serve as living proof of. CUT TO: INT. SUMMERS HOUSE - CONTINUOUS Buffy walks out of the kitchen. Xander flies down the stairs and over to Buffy. XANDER You get a visit from Mr. Clean? That bathroom is as spotless and shiny as a pirate earring on a bald guy. BUFFY Dawn. I don't know what's gotten into her but she's doing loads around the house. I'm not complaining--less for me to do both in cleaning and giving her orders. XANDER Sure you don't wanna come? You might see Brad Pitt. BUFFY You want me to see Brad so I can lure him away from Jennifer thus opening her up for you. XANDER Hey! It would be a mega accomplishment to get turned down by her. That's one to write home about...or you guys since my family would laugh at my failure instead of a good-natured chuckle. BUFFY Where's Anya? XANDER I assume still in bed. BUFFY Falling out? XANDER No, she's got good balance--hangs on the edge surprising well. BUFFY Xander... XANDER Used to be that people should worry about MY wandering eye. BUFFY Anya's crush? XANDER Obsession. BUFFY That's overstating it. XANDER Now--maybe. But Anya is unwavering and determined and no matter what, this thing she's got for Faith isn't stopping. BUFFY I don't believe it can go beyond what it is now--namely, an inconvenience. XANDER Used to say the same about Spike. BUFFY Faith won't allow it--and Anya has her sensibilities. XANDER Outstanding argument Buff. BUFFY Drain every ounce of fun as possible out of this trip Xander...and I'll do my best to keep things on the level. Xander quietly nods. He turns and walks out. CUT TO: INT. SUMMERS BASEMENT - DAY Buffy and Faith spar as Giles takes notes and Anya watches from the stairs. GILES So the Goblin managed to escape despite your dual presence? ANYA They were busy. GILES With...? Buffy and Faith stop. BUFFY Recovering. GILES From...? FAITH My bad. GILES Translated as...? ANYA On the verge of engaging in nasty lesbian sex. Giles unwittingly breaks his pencil. Buffy and Faith look everywhere but each other. GILES (to Buffy and Faith) Astoundingly, I have to ask if there's any validity to that. BUFFY FAITH No. Absolutely not. Not in No friggin' way would I ever a million zillion years sex up the Prissy Princess would I touch her in any way and that chemically-treated reserved for a man. blondage. ANYA LIARS! I can sense the horniness radiating off you in waves. GILES I think that's enough for today. Anya, assist me with research materials, will you? Giles heads to the stairs and takes hold of Anya. ANYA And leave them alone? No no no no. (to Buffy and Faith) Keep those hands where you both can see them! Giles carries Anya out of the basement. Buffy takes an appraising look at Faith--she's sweating with her hair in disarray. Buffy's a little flustered. BUFFY You have to do something about that. FAITH Ain't my fault if Giles wants to shut her up. BUFFY You're right on that one, but I mean Anya's crush on you. It may be getting out of hand. FAITH Nothin' HAS happened or WILL happen and not even my sex-drive is that overwhelmin'. BUFFY Fair enough, but that won't stop her. Anya can be erringly persistent. FAITH Whatever. BUFFY Hey, this isn't an issue to write off. FAITH What's it to you anyway? BUFFY Xander's my friend and I don't want to see him get hurt. FAITH And...? BUFFY And I don't care for this flippant fuck you attitude you're throwing around. Faith doesn't respond. BUFFY Is it my turn to "AND...?" YOU? FAITH No--wasn't what I wanted to hear. BUFFY Spell it out for me--those chemicals must be altering my brain-waves. FAITH Forget it...just stupid wishful thinkin'. Buffy and Faith stare at each other for a moment before Faith breaks it. Dawn comes down. DAWN Okay, I cleaned all the bedrooms and figured since I've got nothing but time on my hands, I'd clean this place so get out. FAITH Shouldn't you be at the mall or whatever teenage shit teenagers do? DAWN I know you're a skanky bitch Faith, but seriously, I don't care. FAITH Not what I said. DAWN Huh...eh. BUFFY Dawny, the cleaning has accelerated to sociopathic, so a break might be a good idea. DAWN I've got nothing better to do. BUFFY Go hang with Elle--have a sleepover. DAWN She's got better things to do. BUFFY Then, I think quality time is a must in... CUT TO: INT. MALL - NIGHT Buffy and Dawn stroll through. DAWN I'm glad we did this. BUFFY Wow, second time this week I've gotten that. Not bad. DAWN Don't flatter yourself--won't be making a habit of these trips. BUFFY Of course. (beat) Can't you bury the hatchet with Faith? DAWN Replace the word "with" with "in" and I'll happily follow suit. BUFFY This animus is overblown Dawn. DAWN Yes because she's changed, she's good now, blah blah blah and Spike having a soul makes his raping you all peachy. BUFFY I don't make excuses for that last thing anymore. What you and most people are fooled by is the idea that Faith has changed when she hasn't. DAWN So I can kill her? Buffy halts them and gets dead serious. BUFFY She was good then and she is now-- before it was way too complicated. DAWN Yeah, it's so hard displaying your goodness because nobody likes the good guys. BUFFY Obviously you don't get it so don't pretend otherwise. She had--HAS-- personal demons but no real concept of how to deal with them. The friends and allies she has now are the ones she needed four years ago...I failed her most of all. Faith needs and deserves our support because she is a wonderful and morally good person. If you don't believe her--she won't say it anyway--but believe me when I say it. DAWN I've got my own irrational inner demons and I can't give her a pass. (beat) Still only sixteen. The girls continue walking for the escalator. BUFFY Mature sixteen. DAWN For the record, YOU said mature. Why so passionate defender of all things Faith? Guilt? BUFFY That would be courtesy of my irrational inner demons-- fortunately, they're quiet on this one. Don't know how to explain it. DAWN Okay. As they reach the down escalator, Dawn spots Elle come out of the ice cream shop on their floor with the Jock. Dawn freezes. Buffy notices Dawn then follows her line of vision to Elle. BUFFY She's done well for herself. DAWN Yeah. BUFFY Gonna say hi? DAWN No. Doesn't need me bumpin' into her date. BUFFY Dawn...are you okay? DAWN Fine. Always fine. Thanks for asking. BUFFY Because you can tell me anything. DAWN Much appreciated, but my state of fine hasn't changed. BUFFY I mean it Dawn. DAWN (quietly) I'll keep that in mind. BUFFY Come on...I promised Giles we'd be back for research. Got plenty of sensational-slayer-snooping to do and you can tag along. Buffy nudges a somber Dawn onto the escalator. As they go down, Elle catches them and is disappointed. CUT TO: EXT. GRAVEYARD - NIGHT Dawn, Faith, and Giles alertly walk. DAWN Buffy's version of "tag along" is SO loaded. GILES Dawn, your grumbling protests do not contribute any identifiable positives to this mission. FAITH It's no prob G-man...she's got a right to feel that way. DAWN Did I ask you to speak on my behalf? My entire self says it can speak on its own so SHUT IT! GILES Both of you immature big babies will remain silent. FAITH I practically agreed with her. GILES She did not agree with your agreement so it's quiet time for you as well. DAWN Buffy said I was mature for sixteen. GILES Buffy also VOLUNTEERED to team with Anya. What does she know? CUT TO: EXT. CEMETERY - NIGHT Anya ignores Buffy as they walk. BUFFY If there's one thing I do know, it's that Xander loves you and is not jonesing for a three-way with Faith as the guest star. ANYA That's two things. Can't even count--what does Faith see in you? BUFFY I don't know what you're talking about. ANYA Deny deny deny. You are a walking- talking representation of the American government. BUFFY Ooh, yeah, I'm a conspiracy in boots. ANYA So you admit it. BUFFY I admit nothing. ANYA You deny yet you admit you have something to deny. BUFFY (loudly) What the fuckity fucking fuck does Xander fucking see in you? What does anyone see in you, you dixie twit? ANYA First off, I resent that on numerous massive levels. Second-- language Buffy, my God. Buffy throws her hands in the air. CUT TO: EXT. PARK - NIGHT The whole group meets up. BUFFY Anything? FAITH Zilch. DAWN Nada. You? BUFFY Negative. ANYA Nil. GILES I am giving you all textbooks on how to form COMPLETE SENTENCES! FAITH You implyin' somethin' G-man? Hey, that was a complete sentence! ANYA (to Faith) You're amazing. Many sets of eyes roll. There's a CRASH in the distance. The group runs to where the swings are and a GRUNGE CHICK opens a trap door in the ground. Buffy and Faith race over to her and grab her. She SHRIEKS. GRUNGE CHICK Let go. Girls just wanna have fun. FAITH Hey B, how 'bout a chorus? BUFFY (to Grunge Chick) Where does this lead to? GRUNGE CHICK Why should I tell you? DAWN We're four grown girls and a guy in a Sunnydale playground at night. GRUNGE CHICK Club--The Underground--exclusive as hell...well, hell ain't exclusive, or at least I'm sure it's not, wouldn't know-- EVERYONE --SHUT UP! FAITH Exclusive? Like, invitation only? GRUNGE CHICK Sorta. Depends on who you know-- management's option one. BUFFY Demons? GRUNGE CHICK Yeah. Been a work in progress for a few years since the slayer came to town. Heavy on demons but humans are more than welcome--not just as entrees but guests too. GILES Does the management team have a goblin as a member? GRUNGE CHICK Define member. Everyone glances at each other knowingly. CUT TO: INT. THE UNDERGROUND - NIGHT The group led by Grunge Chick enter. There's multiple levels to the arena-size place. Strobe lighting, pounding MUSIC, DEMONS mingling and/or scarfing on HUMANS. It's got an outdoor street-feel, raw energy pulsating throughout. BUFFY (shouting; to Grunge Chick) Where is he? GRUNGE CHICK Don't know for sure. My guess... Grunge Chick points upwards. The group advances. Grunge Chick goes her own way. The group divides up into the crowd. We follow Buffy as she wades past figures and ends up at a staircase. She races up 5 levels to the top and does some stealth snooping. CREATURES are scattered. Buffy enters a maze-like hallway where she turns and turns finding only dead-ends, until... She finds a door on the ceiling. Buffy looks around and eyes one of the walls. She pulls out a stake. She leaps in the air and uses the butt to drive several large dents in a wall creating a kind of ledge to hold on to. She leaps one more time and grasps the ledge. She swings back and forth a few times and then rockets feet first smashing through the door and lands in another hallway. There's a regular door at the end and Buffy approaches. CUT TO: INT. OFFICE - CONTINUOUS The door swoops open and Buffy swaggers in. Goblin Guy is startled out of his seat and so are his colleagues, a POWER VAMP and a gray SUPER DEMON. BUFFY Quite an eclectic trio. Shall we? Buffy gives a taunting hand gesture triggering the Power Vamp and Super Demon to attack simultaneously. Buffy's got them covered as she jumps in the air and does a split into a double-kick sending both demons staggering back. Buffy whips out her stake and fires a strike on the Power Vamp, dusting him. The Super Demon rushes Buffy but she unloads with a series of punches and kicks, beating the crap out of him with rapid fury. She knees the Super Demon in the gut, grabs him, and guns him headfirst into the wall causing a SHATTERING SMOOSH sound. The Super Demon falls dead. Buffy turns to see Goblin Guy smiling admiringly. GOBLIN GUY Nice. BUFFY Thank you. Getting kudos from the other side is always welcome. GOBLIN GUY You're not getting out of here alive. BUFFY That's my line. If I had said it, it would've been true. Goblin Guy turns red and soars through the air to whack Buffy. Buffy hits the wall but gets right back up and goes for Goblin Guy, but he gets out of the way. Goblin Guy jumps on Buffy and lands a few shots before Buffy connects with an elbow to the head and several successive kicks and punches that stun Goblin Guy. There's a vicious exchange of countless blows. Buffy ducks a punch and connects with a devastating uppercut, kick to the head, right cross, another kick to the head, then a knee to the groin area causing Goblin Guy to HOWL. BUFFY Allow me to apologize for being so darn insincere. I won't prolong the pain. Buffy wraps an arm around Goblin Guy's neck, runs for the wall, jumps up against it, spins in the air and twists off Goblin Guy's head. The body falls dead. Buffy punts the head. BUFFY When did I become so gruesome? CUT TO: INT. THE UNDERGROUND - MOMENTS LATER MAZE HALLWAY Buffy hops down into the frame. She cautiously makes her way through the hallway system, encountering no resistance at any turn. UPPER LEVEL She makes it out of the hall and finds all the Creatures lying dead. Buffy examines the damage, bloody bodies wall- to-wall. There's no one else around. The fun rages on down below. The MUSIC filtering to the top, the lights a maniacal flashing of red. Buffy walks all the way to one side of the level, then sharply turns around, her eyes capturing Faith across the way. Buffy is stone-still, her face as passive as it can get, willing herself to remain cool and collected. Faith confidently, but leisurely, crosses the level over the deadly mess until she's right up in front of Buffy. The SOUNDS of the club drown out in favor of that ominous HEARTBEAT. FAITH Figured you might want some backup--BUFFY. BUFFY Overkill--don't ya think? FAITH For you--ain't a fuckin' thing on the planet that stands a chance. Buffy manages a jittery smile, her breathing and the HEARTBEAT quickening. Faith brings her hand up and caresses Buffy's cheek. Buffy leans into the touch ever so lightly, her eyelids fluttering. Faith leans in, her eyes filled with uncertainty, Buffy's with fear. FAITH Tell me not to--gimme the word and I won't. Buffy's trembling...her hand covering Faith's on her face. Faith continues her descent... END ACT THREE |
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