PART 2 That day was like a blur to Buffy… She had gone running out into the hall after her dark counterpart, but she was no where to be seen. Faith was gone… She didn't know how she even got there, but the blonde slayer somehow managed to make it back into the apartment and was now laying on top of the brunette's old bed. She laid there quietly, on her back, gazing around the room. How could she not notice? All the things she said to her…how Faith looked when she said them…how mean she had been…. Many thoughts went through the older slayer's mind, all of them coming back to one thing…it was all her fault. She wanted to push the younger slayer away…so she got what she wanted…right? Buffy curled her hands into tight fists as she thought. Why did she do this? She liked the relationship she was building with Faith…or rather HAD with the other slayer... Maybe she liked it a little too much…but now she was gone. Faith was gone and Buffy was left with heavy thoughts on her mind. It was easy to forget. Easy to throw yourself into someone or something and ignore everything and everybody else. It was something that the older slayer was used to doing…it was easier that way… And when it came to Faith…she seemed to do it a lot… But near the beginning, when they first moved in, Buffy let go. And those times with the brunette slayer were the best. The blonde didn't hide behind anything, didn't ignore anything, nothing, and it was great… Then all the doubts, insecurities, the what ifs, and thoughts came bubbling up. And Buffy did what she was best at, pushed away. She met the Immortal, and at first, he had charmed her…literally…and it made Buffy sick. Faith was going through a point where she was in demand at other locations, and the older slayer grew a little lonely, not to mention all the things going through her mind… It was easy to pretend, easy to throw herself into a 'relationship' with the Immortal. It wasn't real, so it made it easier. And Buffy almost made herself believe that she actually liked being with him. She began to spend more and more time with him and seeing Faith less and less. He was using her, she was using him…but he didn't need to know that…and it didn't suck that he was great looking, good company, had money, and a charmer… That was till Faith had walked in on them… She had felt her, heard her, but it was too late. The brunette didn't think that she knew, but she did. She had shoved the Immortal away, but by the time she got to the door, the younger slayer was already gone… Everything was jumbled up in the older slayer's mind. Memories and thoughts came rushing through, giving her a headache. Buffy sat up and put her head in her hands. She had really done it now…and she didn't even know if she could fix it. And she did want to fix it…didn't she? How could she think that? Faith was important to her…was something…meant something to her that she herself didn't want to think about…it was the whole point of how/why she threw herself into the relationship she had with the Immortal. But how could she have let it come this far? Why did she have to behave like this? But she knew why…she was afraid… Tears began to form in the older slayer's eyes, running down her cheeks. She didn't notice them. Everything was eating away at her and she didn't know what to feel, do, let alone think at the moment… And that was how Andrew had found her. He came in with his first load of things to find her there, crying. And Buffy hated herself. Hated herself for acting the way she did. Hated herself for hurting Faith the way she did. Hated herself for crying and for letting Andrew of all people see her. Hated herself for being so afraid to get really close to people…there were many things that the blonde slayer could think of at the moment to hate herself for… This was what she tried to avoid…being hurt…Faith leaving…. But Buffy didn't stop to think about what her actions did to the other slayer, how they affected her. She should have known better. The two slayers always ended up hurting one another somehow… That day was a total mess. And the older slayer felt as though a cyclone had hit her, and she just wanted it all to go away… That very day, Faith was called to go to Ireland. She was tired, drained, felt like crap, had just moved in, and now she had to leave again. But she was needed, and she knew it. She had a job, a responsibility, a duty, and a purpose. There was no stopping. With that knowledge on her mind, and knowing that she was meant for greater things, with a determined attitude, Faith packed a small bag and headed off to Ireland. That day was one of the longest and most tiring ones she had ever experienced… Meanwhile, Buffy had gotten the new where-a-bouts to Faith's new apartment. Andrew had told her, after finding her in Faith's old room, and also informed her that he had spoken with Xander and that he was going to contact the brunette slayer about a new slayer that needed help there. Meaning, the younger slayer would be heading out of the country again… Without really thinking, the blonde slayer had ran out of the apartment and booked it for the younger slayer's new apartment. She didn't really know what she was going to do or say, but she knew she couldn't leave things the way they were with the brunette slayer… But it was too late…again… Faith was gone, and Buffy just stood there, out of breath, feeling even worse than she already did. What was she going to do? Buffy was all about control. And the situation she was in now…was so beyond out of control to her…and she didn't know what to do for once…or even what she should be feeling…and it frustrated her, confused her…and she didn't like feeling that way…and there was only one way she knew that would make herself stop feeling that way…at least for the time being… She was going to see the Immortal… A week had gone by, and it all seemed to have been a blur for the blonde slayer. So much had happened… Andrew was all moved in. And he wasn't as bad as a roommate as Buffy thought...but he wasn't Faith… Buffy had been with the Immortal the past few days, trying to forget everything and the way she felt. They had hung out at the apartment, much to Andrew's annoyance, and watched TV…something so simple…yet it meant nothing to the older slayer. And it wasn't the same…it wasn't like when she and Faith used to watch TV together. And it made it worse that they were in the same apartment. That night, they were going out, dancing…something that she and Faith used to do… The blonde slayer couldn't even do the simplest thing without thinking of the brunette…she still felt guilty…confused…one couldn't even place words to all the things that the blonde felt. That night was the same night that Angel and Spike came from LA. Buffy never saw them, and was beyond shocked to find out that they had come looking for her…that Spike was alive again. Andrew had told her all about it. She had felt a little guilty for not seeing them. But it was good that she didn't see them in a way. She knew they were upset, upset with her…but…as much as she, herself, never truly admitted, she was just a girl… But that was an entirely different story… Faith had returned a few days later, and was disappointed to hear that Angel had been in town. Again, she missed another chance to see him. Nothing ever worked out, it seemed, for the brunette slayer. The trip to Ireland wasn't bad. Things went smoothly and it was nice to see Xander again. He had been helping new slayers down there, training them in his spare time, and ran a construction company as well. He had built an actual headquarters for new slayers. Ones that didn't have family or were runaways were stationed there. Several watchers lived there, and there was training, among other things. Xander had a good thing going there. It was kind of hard to imagine Xander heading it all but he had help, and was doing really well. She was happy for him. He had asked if she wanted to join them, but she turned him down. She noted that one day she just might take him up on that offer, but not at the moment... That night, while on patrol, the brunette felt someone following her, but she knew very well who it was, and it made her stop. "Didn't think I could take care of myself B?" The dark slayer asked without turning around. A shadow stepped out in the alley behind her. "Uh, no, it's not that…I just…heard you were back…" Buffy spoke softly as the brunette still hadn't turned around. Faith sighed and closed her eyes for a moment. Why was she following her? Hasn't she done enough? "Whatch ya need B?" the younger slayer asked turning around to face her counterpart. Buffy looked away from her and the brunette frowned. The older slayer clasped her hands in front of her and started to fidget a little before replying. "I just wanted to see how you were…been kind of lonely without you…" Buffy spoke softly, not meeting the other girl's eyes. Faith narrowed her own eyes at the other girl. What was this? "Yeah, well, now you know I felt," she replied before turning around and continuing walking down the alley she was patrolling. She winced at her own words a little bit. She then could hear Buffy's quick footsteps as she jogged to catch up with the younger slayer. "Faith…Faith wait," Buffy called to her before reaching her and turning the brunette to face her. "Look, I'm sorry. I…I don't know what to say…I…" the blonde slayer tried, looking for the right words to say. The brunette just looked at her. The older slayer seemed different…like…like she used to before the whole Immortal thing and before everything turned sour. It wasn't something that just stood out and screamed at you…but Faith could sense it. Could sense it from the older slayer in several ways…her clothes, her body language, her attitude…everything…maybe she was wrong…but something seemed different…that something had changed… "You cut your hair," Faith stated a little out of the blue. Buffy just looked at her blankly for a moment. "Uh, yea…it was getting too long," the older slayer replied as she ran a hand through her layered shoulder length hair. "I think I look a little stupid," she added looking down. She realized that Faith just gave her a way out…that she was making things simpler for her…she always seemed to do that, even when Buffy hurt her, Faith always took it…and here she was, changing the subject, letting her off the hook… The younger slayer could tell that the blonde felt bad. And it actually surprised her a little. The older slayer felt a hand in her hair and looked up. Faith was running her fingers through it a little bit, smiling sadly at her. "No, I like it…you look beautiful…" the dark slayer stated, letting her hand fall to her side. Faith knew this would happen. One moment, one look from Buffy Anne Summers, and she was sinking back…but she couldn't, she wouldn't. Buffy had hurt her…and she couldn't get hurt again… The brunette was kicking herself for slipping. For saying what she said and for letting the moment happen. "Thanks…" Buffy merely whispered as she looked at her. The younger slayer then stepped away from the blonde and put her hands in her pockets, looking away from her. "I should get back to patrolling," Faith stated as she turned around again. Buffy's heart sank a little bit, she wanted to make it better. Wanted to fix things…but what if she was too late? "Faith…" Buffy lamely attempted. The brunette stopped but didn't turn to face her. "Buffy…I-I can't do this with you right now…I don't want to admit this but you hurt me…and hurt me bad…I…I just need to do my own thing right now…I-I have to go," the younger slayer explained as she continued to walk into the night, leaving the blonde slayer in the dim lighting of the alley…alone… PART 3 It had been a few days. And here Faith was, sitting in the old apartment, fidgeting. The brunette slayer quickly stood up as she heard the door knob being turned. “Andrew, I told you not to...” Buffy was saying as she was walking into the apartment with 2 big brown sacks, trying to juggle them while trying to open/close the door. Her voice died as she saw Faith standing in the middle of the apartment. What was she doing here? “Hey,” the brunette awkwardly stated as Buffy looked at her for a moment, surprised to see the younger slayer. “Oh...uh...let me help you with that,” Faith stated as she approached the older slayer and took one of the brown bags from her. The brunette then realized that it was a stupid gesture, being that the blonde could handle much more than 2 brown bags. Buffy seemed to come out of her daze as she watched the retreating form of the younger slayer go into the kitchen area with the sack she had just taken from her. Closing the door, the older slayer followed her counter part into the kitchen. To say she was really surprised to see the younger slayer would be an understatement. “Uh...Andrew let me in before you left...sorry for dropping in...” the brunette stated awkwardly as Buffy sat down her bag. The blonde slayer shut her eyes for a moment, images or rather memories of their last conversation running through her mind. It was only a moment, not even a second, and Buffy reopened her eyes and glanced at the brunette. “Oh, no no. It’s ok. Was just a little surprised to see you is all...but it’s nice...I mean, to see you again...” the older slayer stated awkwardly, as she removed a few items from the bag she had just sat down. Faith lightly smiled as she watched the blonde move about the kitchen. She couldn’t help it. She missed Buffy. And a lot had happened in the past few days with the brunette slayer, and she had done a lot of thinking. She knew that coming back to the apartment and seeing the other slayer would be awkward...but she didn’t care. She wasn’t going to hide behind feelings or anything anymore. And she did need friends, or what equals to one...and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t totally shut the older slayer out of her life... A voice, in the back of the brunette slayer’s mind was telling her not to do this. Telling her to get the hell out of the apartment and run. A voice that she had become so used to. It whispered to her how she was only going to get hurt, how the blonde slayer would screw her over...again...but the younger slayer blocked it all out. It didn’t have to be like that, or the way it was before. Faith knew better now, and she didn’t have to totally shut everyone out. Besides, she got worried about the other slayer. She may be on her own and doing her own thing and finding her own place in the world, but she didn’t have to do it totally alone. Buffy could feel the younger slayer’s eyes on her as she moved about the kitchen. The whole situation was a little weird, neither slayer not knowing what to exactly say to one another. But Buffy wasn’t the one to show up at her apartment...it was Faith. So the older slayer chose to just be quite for the moment being, thoughts running through her head. “Uh, I thought you would be out tonight. You know, with the Immortal guy or something,” Faith stated. After she said it, she wished she could have taken it back. It was a stupid thing to say. But the brunette was never that good with verbal skills. Buffy winced lightly. And it didn’t go by unnoticed. “No. I stopped seeing him a while a go...while you were still away in Ireland. It was a mistake to have ever dated him anyway,” the older slayer said as she finished putting a few drinks in the refrigerator. She really didn’t know what else to say. And she was a little confused too. The younger slayer just shows up, and with everything that has happened...the blonde doesn’t know what to think, let alone feel... Faith was a little surprised. No wonder the older slayer seemed different when she had last seen her in the alley. Now the brunette was a little confused. Why would the blonde end it with the Immortal? Not that she really cared...or at least that is what she told herself...but she seriously thought Buffy was into him... “Oh...well how come? I mean, if you don’t mind me asking. I just thought that you really liked him,” the brunette stated, a little uncomfortable with the whole situation they were in right now and the conversation they were having. She wasn’t the only one. Buffy threw away the one bag she had finished putting groceries away from and sighed a little, wondering where this was all going and also not knowing what to say. “It was...I was...I couldn’t do it. I didn’t really like him all that much anyway, and I saw that there were more important things around me that I was missing while I was with him,” the older slayer stated as she briefly looked up at Faith then back to the other bag on the counter that was beside the brunette slayer. She really didn’t mean to say that. She didn’t know what she was saying... “I think I liked the idea of being with him more than I actually was with him. It’s...it’s complicated. Probably something you really don’t want to hear anyway...” Buffy stated as she reached out for the other bag and started going through it. Faith hopped up on the counter, swinging her legs a little as she sat there. “Try me,” the brunette stated as she looked at the older slayer hoping to build what was once there, the friendship they once had. To show the other slayer that she wanted to start over... Buffy gave her a sideways glace. She knew that Faith was just trying to be nice, trying to be there as a lending ear, maybe even as a friend...but the blonde didn’t really want to talk about it. But she didn’t want to make it look like she was pushing the younger slayer away either. That was the last thing she wanted. The blonde sighed again. “Well...have you...have you ever just, done something to just focus on something else? Like, it was easier to just...” Buffy actually tried to explain as she turned around to face the other slayer. Faith cocked her head to the side and Buffy stopped. “Uh...never mind...” the blonde slayer said, turning back around, at a loss of what to say. Then out of the blue, she smacked her forehead and shook her head. She felt like a retard. Why did she have to open her mouth? A soft chuckle could be heard behind her as she turned back around. “You’re one cute funny chick, you know that?” Faith questioned, still chuckling a little. Buffy smiled. It was almost like old times...the way things use to be before...before she messed it all up. “Sorry, it’s just hard to explain. I mean, it isn’t that I don’t want to tell you or rather explain it to you or anything like that, I do, I would...but well, it’s...” the older slayer babbled and Faith smiled at her. “Talked to Red recently?” The brunette slayer asked, cutting Buffy off. The older slayer looked up at her for a moment with a confused face as Faith lightly laughed again. The blonde just shook her head. “Two seconds, and you are already teasing me. You know, I think Willow got her babble from me,” Buffy stated as she placed a few things in some cupboards. The brunette merely shook her head. “Naw, I get what you are saying B. Things can be difficult to explain sometimes. I, of all people, know that. So I understand, no big.” Faith said as the older slayer finished putting everything away. There was a moment of awkward silence between the two. Both slayers were lost in thought. “So...uh...why...why did you come here?” Buffy asked, hoping she didn’t sound as if she didn’t want the other slayer there, for she did, but didn’t know what to say... Faith looked at her, silent for a moment, before hopping off the counter she was sitting on. “Thought we could patrol together...you know, hang out,” Faith said with a smile as the older slayer just looked at her, a little dumbfounded... PART 4 Faith stood in the middle of her apartment, looking at the cell phone that was in her hand. After a moment, the dark haired slayer set the phone on a near by stand before sitting down in the arm chair that was next to it. It had been a week since Faith had been at the old apartment and talked with Buffy. Since that day, the two had gotten together periodically to patrol and/or hang out. They patrolled more than hung out. It wasn’t just like everything was forgotten and they were good old buddies again or anything. They hung out a few times at a local café and talked. Nothing too big. Both slayers were simply enjoying their time with each other, and the quite awkwardness seemed to dissipate after a while. Both slayers were still doing their own respectable jobs and duties as slayers. Neither one would admit it, but both girls were glad to be friends again...or what it seemed they were becoming to be again. Neither slayer ever brought up or talked about The Immortal again, or about the argument they had and the younger slayer leaving. It wasn’t forgotten, but not voiced. Neither slayer wanted to ruin what they started to build again. Faith sighed as she stared out the window, deep in thought. The younger slayer had grown a lot with in the past few years. Even more so in the last month, as oddly as it may seem. The brunette slayer, knew who she was, and took up her duty as a slayer as well as the responsibilities that she now held, helping other slayers and everything. She found some answers in her life to things she had been looking for. She learned to accept herself for who she was and took some pride in it even. She was a fighter and was strong. She knew she was to help and protect others...others that may be just like her...not that it was a total realization, but Faith always felt like something was missing. Well, that many things were missing, but that there was just one big void in herself. But she felt that if she had a purpose, that that would override everything and nothing else would matter. Accepting herself and who she was, was a big step for Faith...for the brunette used to hate everything about herself. Now that she was over most of that, she was able to accept what and who she was. Allowing herself to find purpose in life and in this world. But not matter how hard she tried, or what she did...she still felt a big hole. A big piece missing. Not to mention the fact that the dark slayer still felt the need to fulfill her redemption. She wanted so badly to make up for all the wrong she had did...and that whole mess was another story.... But...just a few minutes ago... Angel had called her........ Not Giles, not Willow, Not even Buffy...but her.... And he wasn’t even going to call Buffy... Out of any and everyone he could of called and talked to, he called her. And it really meant something to her. She didn’t know how he had gotten her cell number, being that no one was aloud to interact with Angel and his gang (something that still puzzled and annoyed the younger slayer), but she didn’t care. It was great to talk to him and to even just hear his voice. But the reason why he called still lingered in her mind... The first thing he said, or rather asked, was how she was. She could tell by the tone of his voice that something was up. But she updated him a little, leaving a few things of unimportance out. She knew that sometimes, Angel wouldn’t always jump right into the point of things. And she just was glad to talk to him in the first place. Angel was on his way to see his son...he was calling her on his way. He said that he just wanted to talk to her to see how she was, to hear her voice, which brought a smile to the brunette slayer’s face. He had told her a short version of what has been going on, and how he was going to take on the senior partners. And Faith couldn’t help but feel pride for the vampire. She believed in him, she knew, no matter what the others said, that Angel was doing good things. Now all she wanted to do was yell, “I told you so” but she couldn’t.... In a way, Angel was calling to say goodbye.... And that gripped her heart. Out of everyone and anyone Faith had ever known, Angel was the only one who never gave up on her, who was there for her no matter what, who believed in her, who cared when no one else did... Again, the thought crossed her mind how he had called her and no one else...so no one knew, and the vampire had told her not to say anything of it. He didn’t flat out say that but said it in a subtle way that Faith got the message without actually saying the words. The vampire had also forbidden her to have any rash ideas of jumping on the next plane down to LA to help, or to get and/or alert anyone to help. It was his own battle and it had to be done carefully without anyone suspecting anything till the last moment. Faith had objected, of course (causing the vampire to tell her not to come in the first place), but Angel had turned her down, saying that what she had going for her now was a good thing, and that she needed to stick to that. Many thoughts were going through the younger slayer’s mind at the moment, as well as bits and pieces of their conversation. Memories of their time together and moments also slowly crept into her mind, mixing with her thoughts. They had talked about a few other things. And the conversation seemed to have lasted forever when it was really only a short time. The vampire had then wished her well, said a few words of encouragement, and said that he would call her again soon... She could almost hear the small smile in his voice as he said it... But she couldn’t get the last thing he said out of her mind: “Oh, and Faith? I’m proud of you...don’t you forget that. I am proud of how far you have come and who you are. You’re a strong person and have overcome some great things to get to where you are now. Just always remember that redemption isn’t a destination...it’s a journey...and I think that you have done great. You’ll do many great things, you’re never alone.” Faith couldn’t help but feel like she had to do something. Angel never once gave up on her. The vampire had done so much for her and helped her to get to where she was now. She felt that she had him to thank for everything. After everything Angel had done for her...she wasn’t just going to give up on him...he never did that to her, and he never would. She wasn’t just going to let it all pass by. Faith then felt something....she felt a little different as a feeling slowly rose with in her...it was almost like something inside her was filling up a little bit... Then she realized... This was it... This was what she needed to do. This is what she was meant to do. After all the wrong she had done...maybe helping Angel would make up for some of it... She couldn’t just let it happen, and do nothing. Even though it was against the vampire’s wishes...she knew she had to help... She knew it was his battle and understood his reasons, but she was going to help him anyway. He would never abandon her, and she would never abandon him. He had done so much for her....made her see things differently...and she knew that she had to be there for him, like he was for her... She felt determination and reason. Faith knew that helping Angel wouldn’t make up for all the wrong she had caused in her life, nor would it change how things were now and how the brunette slayer felt, but it was something she had to do. This was what she did, what she was. Something big was going to go down in LA, and people she knew and even cared for (though she would never fully outright admit it) may very well be hurt or even killed...and she couldn’t have that, wouldn’t have that. Faith was a slayer. One born in every generation...or well...maybe not just one anymore, but this was her job, her calling. And even though the vampire didn’t ask her, or say it, and even forbid her to come...he needed her. And she wasn’t going to stand by while Angel fought with his life... This was something that she owed him, maybe even owed herself in a way....but regardless, this was something she knew she needed to do... And she knew...deep down inside...that she very well may not come out of it alive.... And there was only one thing...one person...that the brunette slayer could think of, at that moment, that she wanted to see before she left... But she had to hurry, for time was running out... PART 5 Faith stood, shifting her weight in between her feet, as she hesitated in front of the door for a minute before knocking on it. She didn't know how she was going to do this, what she was going to say, what she should say... The door suddenly opened, and Faith froze for a second, her mind gone blank. "Wow, you are sure early for patrol, come on in," Buffy greeted, stepping to the side and smiling as she saw that it was Faith who was at her door. The brunette slayer smiled lightly as she stepped into the apartment. She felt a little uneasy and didn't know what to do with her hands, shoving them into her pockets. Buffy, who was just glad to see the other slayer, didn't notice as she shut the door and turned towards her. "Yeah, about that..." Faith started as she turned towards the blonde. She knew she couldn't tell her the truth, couldn't tell her what she was going to do. It broke Faith's heart to do this, and she hoped to god that she was doing a good job at concealing how she was feeling at the moment and that she was doing the right thing... Buffy just looked at her confused for a moment as Faith looked down at her feet for a second. "I have to leave tonight Buffy. In an hour actually, I have to go to the states for a potential," Faith lied as she looked back up at the blonde in front of her. Buffy's face fell a little, the blonde trying not to look as disappointed and sad as she felt. "Leave? Again? Already? Tonight?" she asked, not realizing it sounded all rushed together as she walked past Faith to the couch. On the couch was a pile of clothes that the other slayer had been folding. She kept her back to the brunette as she resumed folding the laundry in front of her. Faith sighed. Why and when did things become so complicated? She wanted to go over to Buffy, pull her into her arms, and tell her how she felt...she wanted to tell the other slayer so many things...but couldn't...and it tore her up inside. No one said anything for a moment. Faith, for her part, was at a loss of what to do or say, and was confused by the whirlwind of conflicting emotions she felt. She almost felt like she was abandoning the other slayer, but as soon as the thought came, the brunette forced it out of her mind. She refused to think like that... Buffy had several thoughts racing in her head as she folded the laundry absent mindedly, as if on auto pilot. Questions of why, thoughts, confusion spilled into her mind, confusing the older slayer. Why was she so saddened anyway? Who was she kidding, she knew exactly why...but couldn't admit it, wouldn't admit it... But she knew that things were good between the two slayers. Things were finally getting better, and she feared that if the brunette left...left her...things would some how change... The silence only last a few seconds, 2 maybe, but it seemed and felt differently to the slayers. Here they stood, where everything started between them. Where their new life had begun, where the starting over took place, where tears were shed, where love was hidden... Faith took a step forward, closer to Buffy. "It won't be long, only a few days. It's a serious case. One that I am really needed for..." Faith said trailing off a little at the end. She hated lying...and she hated to do it to Buffy but she had no choice. And now, with the way things were between them...things were just now getting better... And Faith couldn't help but wonder if she had done right by coming back to Buffy. But she knew, deep down knew, she truly couldn't ever leave the other girl. She brought meaning to her life, even though the brunette had changed from the person she used to be, she was still Faith...and she was human.... And that was why she was here at this moment...Buffy... Unknown to both slayers, they both, at that moment, shared the same thought: How did they get this far? And how exactly were things between them? "Well, maybe...I-I can go with you. You know, help out?" Buffy suddenly asked, turning to the brunette behind her. Faith sadly smiled at her and Buffy, seeing it, pouted a little and scoffed as she turned back around. "Hey, B, don't get me wrong, I would love for you to come with me, but you know why you can't right?" Faith asked, stepping closer to the other slayer, whose back was still turned to her. "Yeah yeah, I know, I'm needed here," Buffy supplied, a little annoyed and bitter, as she laid the blouse she just folded to a pile next to her. Faith again, was at a loss for words...not knowing what to say. "So...uh, how's Dawn?" she asked suddenly. Buffy turned around slightly and gave her a weird look. "She's fine, talked to her yesterday. She's excited to get back here for break so she can see us," Buffy stated as she faced her fully. "That was pretty random," she added as she smiled briefly, tilting her head to the side a little, before turning back to the laundry she was folding. "She's a good kid. She's got a great sister to look up to as a role model...make sure she knows that B, that she's a good kid..." Faith stated, looking at the ground as she shifted the weight of her feet again, moving one of her shoes around. Buffy turned and looked strangely at the brunette. She was acting old. "Ooookey, you can tell her that when she gets back here. You ok? You seem..." Buffy started as she faced the younger slayer. Faith looked up at her blankly for a moment, having been lost in thought, before smiling at her. "I'm fine, just tired I guess..." Faith stated as she trailed off again. She had to get going, she knew it, but was trying to avoid it... Buffy studied her for a moment, the other girl did seem tired, then she remembered that she was leaving soon. "I bet you have a flight to catch," Buffy stated as she turned back around and picked up another shirt to fold. Faith sighed. Sighed at the situation, sighed at not knowing what to do, sighed at how everything was going. Screw it, is what Faith thought at that moment. She might die today, and by hell, she didn't want to have any regrets in the end. With that thought in mind, the brunette slowly approached Buffy from behind and casually slipped her arms around her waist, her hands slowly coming around the blonde, who stopped what she was doing, sighing. "Buffy..." Faith lightly whispered, as the blonde set down the garment in her hand. "What if things change?" Buffy asked as she turned in the brunette's embrace, causing Faith to place her hands at the older slayer's waist. "What changes?" Faith asked, happy that the older slayer didn't freak out on her. "What if...what if this-this thing," Buffy stated, gesturing between the two of them with her hand, "Goes away. What if, while you're gone, this-this thing that we tried so hard to bond again goes away, I mean..." Buffy tried to say, voicing her worries.
"Shhhhhhhh," Faith whispered as she placed her finger on Buffy's lips, silencing her. Her other hand was still placed at the blonde's waist. "You need to stop worrying so much Buffy. It isn't good for you." The brunette stated in a near whisper as her finger slipped down and traced the other slayer's jaw line. Buffy's heart was beating a mile a minute. The way the brunette was making her feel at the moment? She was lost in it. Silence hung between them as Faith intently stared at her, her brown eyes pouring into Buffy's. Something in the back of the blonde's mind told her that something wasn't right, that something was wrong. But the feeling was ignored, pushed aside as the younger slayer leaned forward, resting her forehead against Buffy's. Faith brought her hand back up, cupping the blonde's cheek, as her thumb brushed her cheek in a soft caress. "No matter what happens...no matter where I am, where I go, what I do...I'll always come back to you. I'll always be there. Nothing could keep me from you," the brunette stated, burning Buffy with the emotion in her eyes. The blonde's chest ached with the emotion Faith was causing her at the moment, overwhelming her with the passion in her eyes, touch, and words. "Even when I'm not here, with you, I'll always be here, with you...because there's no where else I'd rather be..." Faith whispered as the hand that cupped the blonde's cheek, moved to point directly at Buffy's heart. Buffy took a deep breath, tears threatening to spill from her eyes from the overwhelming pack of emotions she felt at the moment, that Faith made her feel.. Faith looked deep into the other slayer's eyes, and for a moment, Buffy saw a deep sadness in them. But the thought was washed away, as the brunette leaned into Buffy, meeting her lips with her own, in a soft gentle kiss. It was brief, and Buffy recaptured the brunette's lips with her own, both girls feeling the passion, in that one moment. Buffy couldn't think, couldn't even form a thought. Faith's lips were so soft and sweet against her own, and as the brunette slowly pulled away, and the blonde opened her eyes, she already found herself missing them... Faith looked at Buffy, about ready to choke at the amount of emotions running through her from that one kiss. Reality was brought back to her as she parted from the blonde, and it killed her. She had to go. She knew it, and thought it best to leave now, quickly, before she reveled anything...before the facade she was holding up broke... She didn't want to leave her, but she had to. A small fear still lay in the back of her mind, that Buffy was going to freak out. But she knew that that wasn't the case. The way Buffy was looking at her right now, was begging her to stay, to stay there with her, not to leave... And that was the main reason why she had to do it now, had to walk away...had to be strong, just like she always was. It never mattered, no matter how badly she wanted some things, she couldn't have them... After briefly meeting Buffy's eyes, Faith turned around and walked to the door. No words were spoken as she opened the door, Buffy right behind her. Buffy wanted to say something, anything, maybe even make her stay...but the words wouldn't come out. She silently stood there, at her door, as she watched Faith walk over to the elevator that was on that floor and pushed the button, causing the doors to slide open. Faith stepped into the elevator and pushed the button to go down to where she had parked her car. As she looked up, she saw Buffy's sad face looking back at her from her doorway and it broke her... The elevator doors started to close... "Buffy?" Faith quickly called as the blonde looked up to meet her eyes, the elevator doors just about to close... "I love you..." and the doors slid all the way shut... PART 6 It had been a week since Buffy had last seen Faith. A week since she heard those three words come out of the other slayer's mouth before the elevator doors had closed on her. A week since she felt the brunette's soft full lips on hers for the first time…
That week was bitter hell for Buffy and her heart was slowly breaking... After Faith's confession to her, at the elevator, she had run down all seven flights of stairs to catch her, even jumping some of them in her rush, but again…she was too late, and the brunette was gone. It seemed as if Faith knew that the blonde might chase after her and had exited out the ground floor exit and not the first floor, like Buffy thought she would. She could still hear the squeal of tires behind her as she turned and saw Faith's car zooming out of the garage behind her. She tried sprinting after her, but the brunette knew better and had quickly lost her. "Buffy?" "I'm sorry, what did you say?" Buffy asked, turning from the window she was staring out of towards her sister. Dawn gave her a sad look. "Has…I mean, have you heard anything?" Dawn asked, sitting next to her sister. The older Summers sighed, turning to look back out the window again. "No…not one thing. The only information that has come back, that Giles was able to get, was that most of them died…their friend Gunn…Wesley…Spike…" Buffy started, pausing. They had found the bodies of Wesley and Gunn, knew about their deaths, and two other deaths were confirmed as well… Buffy closed her eyes briefly as she felt Dawn's comforting hand on her shoulder again, "Angel…" she lightly whispered, just barely enough for Dawn to hear as she opened her eyes and turned back to her, "All of them gone." She stated before looking out the window, in thought. "I'm sorry Buffy," Dawn stated, not knowing what else to say to her sister. The older Summers turned to her. "No…it's-it's ok. Angel hung in there till the very end…that much I do know. At least he went out the way he would have wanted to…" Buffy stated as she looked away again, "Fighting on the good side, for a good cause, for the well being of others…always for the well being of others," she sighed as she placed her chin on top of her arm she had draped over her knee. Dawn was on break, and was so excited to be able to see her sister again, as well as Faith… Buffy remembered telling her that…remembered telling Faith that. The blonde shook her head at the thought. Oh how much it hurt the older slayer to tell her sister that Faith was missing…and to see her face fall… "What?" Dawn asked, noticing her sister shaking her head. Buffy turned to her, everything still running through her mind. "I just…I should have known," she stated, looking away. "Known what?" The younger Summers asked. "That something was wrong…that something was going on," Buffy stated before looking back out the window and continuing, "She had asked about you. Just like that, right out of the blue," the blonde said. "Really?" Dawn asked, causing Buffy to look at her from the pitch of her voice. "Yeah…and you know what she said?" Buffy asked, looking at her sister, lightly smiling at the memory. "No, what did she say?" Dawn asked, getting a little excited. "She said that you were a good kid, and to make sure that you knew that…" Buffy said, before trailing off a little, looking back out the window. "I guess that was her way of, I don't know…saying goodbye or something…I don't know…but I should have known then…she was acting odd and…" the blonde was saying before being cut off. "You can't keep blaming yourself Buffy. She didn't tell you where she was really going because she didn't want to be stopped, and she didn't want to hurt you. I think it says a lot that she came to see you before leaving...she didn't call or talk to anyone else other than you before she left. I know you're hurting Buffy, and I am sorry, but I know Faith wouldn't want you to be this way…" Dawn said as she trailed off, not knowing really what else to say. There had been no word on the brunette. After her suspicions and not being able to catch her, Buffy had called Giles to see about the mission he had sent her on, to help calm her uneasiness, and that if she might possibly go as well…and that was when she found out that there was no potential in the states, that the watcher hadn't sent the brunette anywhere….that Faith had lied to her… That was when Giles had started looking for information, and had later found out about Angel and his battle in LA that he was undergoing. He was quick on trying to dispatch slayers to help…but…he was sketchy on information. And the only information she knew of was what he had told her, what had been notified and reported from LA. Sometimes, the blonde wondered if Giles was telling her the whole truth…if he was withholding information from her. But she trusted him, and could only believe what he reported and told her. Buffy wanted to go, wanted to find her. But Giles stressed the importance of her staying put and how having her running off to the States would do no good, and it was killing her. She should have known, should have stopped it. And the blonde couldn't help but wonder why Faith did it. Why she ran off there and didn't tell her. Why the brunette had to dump her feelings on her and then ran…but the blonde also knew better, and was in no way really upset with the other slayer. She just wanted her alive…and there…with her… Giles kept them posted on anything he knew, but there had been no word of her. Faith and one other person where uncounted for from the battle… The brunette was reported being seen there, was present, but there was nothing other than that. They had done some major damage to the Senior Partners, taking out most of their demons, men and allies, but it wasn't enough…It was turning bad when the slayers did finally manage to get there to help them… "Yeah…" Buffy whispered in reply as she placed her chin back on top of her arm again, lost in her thoughts. Dawn sighed as she looked at her sister, knowing how much of a wreck she was over everything, but there was nothing she could do. Dawn had suspected the slayer's hidden feelings for one another a long time ago, mostly from Faith. She could read and see the emotions that ran through the brunette's face when she saw her sister. Just as she saw her try to hide them as well. They weren't always there, weren't always present in view, but every now and then, Dawn saw it. Saw the only weakness that Faith seemed to have…Buffy… She knew that the brunette slayer always had a soft spot for her sister, even though she tried very hard to deny and ignore it, covering it up and how she felt. She noticed it back in Sunnydale and she herself even overlooked it at the time. It was only after they closed the hellmouth and moved in together did she really notice it. And that was when she noticed the change in her sister as well, and how she interacted and took more of a liking to the brunette. Dawn wasn't sure, but she wondered if that wasn't what caused Buffy to push away from Faith in the first place. But she would never dare ask or even mention it, especially now. But she couldn't help but feel bad for them. How they both finally seemed to come to terms with one another and how they felt, only to be torn apart again. Dawn couldn't help but feel angry at Faith. To have done this to her sister, to have caused her such confusion and pain and to just run off. But then she only felt guilty, for she knew that that wasn't what the brunette intended to do. She knew that it was something that the brunette felt like she needed to do, and she respected that, but she didn't like to see her sister this way…so…alone and sad… Dawn only hoped that Faith was alive. That she had survived somehow and was out there somewhere. She only wished, that for once, things could be simple. That time would just slow up so they could all catch up to it. But things never went that way. This was it, how it was, and there was no changing it no matter how much you wanted to… Buffy's sigh brought Dawn out of her moment of thinking and she looked over at her sympathetically again. "Do you want any thing? You haven't eaten much today," Dawn offered as she got up and stood next to her sister. Buffy slowly turned and looked at her, looking more then tired. "No, I'm fine. Thanks," the blonde replied before turning to look out the window again. "You sure? It's no trouble…" Dawn started before being cut off… "No it's ok, thanks though," Buffy interrupted, turning again to her sister, trying to offer a slight smile to encourage her. Dawn lightly smiled back as she made her way out of her sister's room and into the living room. She knew there wasn't really anything she could do for her sister and it frustrated her a little bit. Dawn made her way into the small kitchen and pulled a glass from one of the cupboards as she made her way over to the freezer to put some ice in it. After doing so, she opened the lower part of the refrigerator; she grabbed a can of pop and opened it, lightly kicking the refrigerator door closed as she poured it into the glass. She lightly sighed as she heard a knock at the door, setting down the empty pop can as she took her glass with her to answer the door. Buffy barely registered the knock when she heard it, then sighed as she heard Dawn's footsteps approach the door of their apartment. The blonde was tired of people coming to see her, tired of the worried looks…just tired in general. But her thoughts halted as she heard something shatter, drawing her attention to the source of the noise. "Dawn?" Buffy called out to her sister, checking to see if she was ok. Upon hearing no response, the blonde sighed and stood up from her position at the window and maneuvered around the room to her door way, shaking her head. "Dawn, if you break anything else in this place I swear I'm never buying another…" Buffy froze in the living room, almost choking on her words. "Faith…" In the doorway of the apartment was Giles, supporting a very banged up, tired, but alive, Faith… "Buffy…" Faith rasped before wincing and clutching her side with her good arm as Giles steadied her. Both Summers were immediately at the brunette's side, the broken glass on the floor well forgotten, as they maneuvered her to the couch. Moments later… Dawn stood in the kitchen, quickly peeking into the living room at her sister and Faith. Her sister was seated on the couch, as Faith was curled up on her side, asleep, with her head in Buffy's lap. The blonde ran her fingers through the brunette's hair affectionately as she watched over her. Dawn sighed before turning her attention back to Giles. "What happened?" she asked as she leaned against the counter. Giles sighed and took off his glasses, cleaning them. "No one could find her. It was looking bad when the slayers arrived. To spare you the long story, Illyria, a friend of Angel's crew, had helped her away from the battle, but returned to help the slayers. When they were finally able to reach her…we weren't sure if she was going to make it. Due to her Slayer healing, she's in much better shape now than she was before…she's lucky to only have a broken arm, ribs, minor cuts and bruises now compared to…" Giles drifted off as he pinched the bridge of his noise briefly before placing his glasses back on. Dawn stood expectantly, arms still folded, indicating the Watcher to continue. "Well…we had to place her where she would be safe, and Illyria helped us. She had massive amounts of blood loss, trauma to the head, among other wounds. She was immobile and was unconscious. She only woke up yesterday; yelling out Buffy's name…then demanded that I take her here. She was in no condition to move, let alone travel…" Giles was explaining. "She's stubborn like that," Dawn interrupted, glancing back out into the living room again, witnessing her sister lightly kiss Faith on the head before leaning back further into the couch, a smile playing across her lips ever so lightly. It was the first genuine smile that Dawn had seen from her sister all week. The blonde then lightly closed her eyes, never once changing her position from Faith. Dawn knew that there was more to the story about what happened, but knew it could wait. She was just glad that Faith was back, and alive. But she was more relived at the fact that she had returned to Buffy. Maybe this time…they could make things right… The End |
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