She's so fuckin' perfect....
That's mostly what goes through my head every time I look at her. So I've been hearin' that particular phrase in my head a lot. I mean, she's just such a babe. All that silky wheat colored hair. And those hazel eyes that can either melt ya if she's pleased or burn ya if she's not. I'll admit that I find myself starin' at her a lot.
But hey, it's not like I'm the only one. Shit, look at all the other saps in this room who worship the ground she walks on. Wil's pretty much been thinkin' that B is God's gift since the day they met. Well, maybe that Tara isn't as "B-dazzled" as the rest of us. Red seems to be the only thing on her radar. I like that Tara chick. She's all soft and gentle. I'd do her. But then Red would probably turn me into a nasty little rodent like that Amy witch. And then I'd be all caged up and not gettin' any. Fuck that.... No pussy's that good.
And Xan Man. He's always wanted in her pants. I mean the guy thinks with his dick. Course, he may have thought he'd died and gone to heaven when I took him for a ride. But that was just a physical thing. And you can just tell by lookin' at him that he'd kill for another trip on the Faith Express. Never gonna happen, Xan Man. I don't do that kind of work anymore. Cuz I'm all about the pussy now. But ya know, the way that ex-demon girlfriend of his looks at me sometimes… like she'd like to eat me up..... Makes me kinda wonder if they haven't been thinkin' about a little three-way....
Oh fuck, she's talkin' to me.....
She's doing it again. Staring at me like there's no one else in the room. I can't concentrate when she does that. And she does it a lot. Even though she hasn't been back that long, she's still managed to turn my whole world upside down.
She's always had my attention. Though now I know that I should have paid much more attention to her back then. Maybe a lot of the stuff that happened, wouldn't have. But I was all involved with Angel and then she got all wrapped up in being bad. That's our history. Most of it's not very good. But then Angel dumped me. Like that was a big surprise. I mean a Slayer and a Vampire. What kind of sense does that make anyway? And then she went to prison for manslaughter. Of course, that was better than what the Council wanted to do to her. But I would never have let that happen. Then I tried to hook up with a nice, normal guy. But that didn't work either. Because now I know that I don't really like nice and normal. I like exciting and dangerous. And I really, really like her....
Damn, that was close. It was just a question about weapons. Those kinds of questions I can answer on autopilot. Ask me what I think or how I feel and that's where I get into trouble. I know I should keep my mouth shut. But I just can't help sayin' stuff to her sometimes. Cuz she drives me crazy she's so fuckin' hot.....
I was in prison for a year or so. It wasn't that bad. I got a rep really quick as someone you didn't fuck with. So the real hardcores left me alone. But there were a few of the soft, pretty women that came on to me. It got around that I liked blondes. So I had about four or five that kinda became regulars. They liked doin' it with me. And as long as the rest saw them as mine, they were left alone. So everybody won. They'd come around at all times of the day and night. Sometimes in my cell, sometimes in the shower, or a quiet corner. I'd let them go down on me, get me off good. And then I'd turn ‘em around and bend ‘em over, so I could fuck ‘em from behind. I didn't want to see their faces. Just their blonde hair. Yeah, I know. They were just fillin' in for what I couldn't have. I knew it. I'm not stupid. But for just a split second, when my tongue was fuckin' some chick's pussy real good, or she was creamin' all over my hands, I could just for a second, pretend it was her.
But then Wes sprung me to put the old genie, Angelus, back in the bottle. Angel was able to fix that whole prison thing so that I could help out here. So here I am. Fightin' for the good guys....
I wasn't surprised when she came back here. Even if Angel hadn't called to tell me she was heading this way, I would have known. I could still feel her when she was away. Sometimes it was so strong, it was like she was touching me. I mean, not that she's ever touched me. I wish. See, she has quite a reputation for being really, really good in bed. And if that stupid grin on Xander's face whenever the topic of Faith's sexuality comes up is any indication.....
Anyway, I knew she'd come. But when I finally found her, it was in the last place I expected her to be. She was standing at my mother's grave. Just standing there with a bouquet of cheap flowers that she must have gotten at the bus station. I stayed hidden in the shadows and just watched her. Then suddenly she looked up, right at where I was standing. I knew she couldn't see me. But it felt like her eyes found mine anyway. I walked over and stood next to her for a few minutes. Then she lay the flowers down, picked up her bag, slung it over her shoulder, and waited.
That's all she said. And then she took me home with her.
We never really talked about stuff. I mean, when I got here, the first thing I did was go see her mom. Joyce had been real good to me. And though I turned on her once to bait B, she didn't hold it against me. She wrote to me in prison. Even after she got sick. Told me that she believed in me. That I could change and be anything I wanted to be. Even though I had fucked with her daughter, she was decent to me. I wonder what she would've thought if she knew that what I really wanted to do was fuck her daughter. I'll never know. Because she died. That was a major sucker punch. It really hurt.
When B took me home with her that night, I'm sure no one was happy about it. But she didn't explain and she didn't tolerate any objections. See? That's the funny thing about her. She's such a girl. All soft and feminine. But underneath all that is this powerful, stubborn, incredible woman. I heard an expression once, "An iron fist in a velvet glove." That's B.
I thought she'd stick me on the couch to sleep until she could figure out what to do with me. But instead she took me to her room. It was just like I remembered. All these frilly girly type things. Soft colors, stuffed animals, and lace. I sure must've looked like I didn't fuckin' belong there….
God, I'm glad this meeting is over. They're all still such loyal Scoobies. Well, except for her. She was never really part of the gang. We were all at fault for that. She acted like an outsider and we treated her like one. I know that the gang was pretty shocked when I brought her home with me that first night. But I wasn't gonna let bad things happen to her anymore. And I was tired of trying to keep her out of my life…. and out of my heart.
Look at her now. Slouched in that armchair. That dark, untamed mane of hers spilling down her chest. One leather clad leg propped up over the arm of the chair. How can one person make nonchalance look so sexy? I've never been able to pull off that look. But she makes it look effortless.
That first night was different. She didn't look nonchalant. She looked nervous. Not an emotion I would've normally associated with her. I remember how she looked around at everything but me. My stuffed animals seemed to particularly catch her attention. She was looking at them when I took her bag off her shoulder. She noticed that I purposely set it down on one side of the bed. She frowned at her bag and then looked up at me and said…..
"You want me to stay here?"
I mean she'd led me to her room and all. But I was pretty sure she didn't want me to sleep there. I mean there was only one bed. Yeah, I know that the other two rooms were occupied. Wil and Tara in one, Dawn in the other. She coulda sent me to the basement. But maybe in her mind it woulda seemed too much like another prison cell. Anyway, I wasn't gonna make any assumptions. I was only gonna be where I was absolutely fuckin' sure she wanted me to be.
She looked skeptical when I'd told her that I wanted her to stay with me that night. That we'd figure it all out in the morning. So she'd shrugged her shoulders and taken off her jacket. I really tried not to stare at her. But my god…
Don't think I didn't notice her checkin' me out. Cuz that was exactly what she was doin' as soon as my jacket came off. When I'd gone to prison, I still had kind of a young teenager body…. well, with great tits. I've always had great tits. But I spent lots of hours in the weight room. And I ate everything I could get my hands on, cuz I was always slayer hungry. And well, I guess nature just caught up with me. I had filled out wicked good. Now I was built for every kind of action. I had all the curves and plenty of muscle. I was firm where it counted and I was soft where it counted. And don't think B didn't appreciate the change.
For a moment there, I thought that maybe having her sleep with me wasn't such a good idea. I mean everyone always thought she was really good looking. Ok, I guess what they actually always said was that she was hot. But seeing her standing there in those tight, low slung jeans, that black leather belt, and a tank top so tight… well, let's just say it left no doubt as to where her nipples were….
I couldn't take my eyes off her breasts. They were so deliciously firm and looked so…so perfect…. I probably would have continued to openly ogle her. But I felt a tingling sensation and I looked up at her face and she was grinning. It was the first time I'd seen her smile in such a long time. I had almost forgotten just how gorgeous she was….
Ha! I made her look that night. I caught her and it made me happy. She knew she'd been had, so all she could do was smile back at me. Ok, I can admit that she when did, my heart did some kind of weird flip-flop thing. And ya know what? As much as I've always wanted to fuck her senseless, I coulda been content for the rest of my life just standin' there smilin' at her and her smilin' back at me.
We didn't change in front of each other. I'm glad, cuz that might've been too much for me. I'm not blind, fer christ sake. She may be all delicate looking, but she's still as sexy as hell. Except I'm pretty sure she doesn't know it. She knows that people fall all over themselves to be a part of her life. Yeah, yeah, I know, including me. But I think she thinks that it's because she's the slayer. And maybe that hero thing is part of it. But mostly when ya see her, ya just wanna run your hands all over her. And not just your hands…
I behaved that night. I'd gotten used to sleepin' with kind of a sixth sense on my surroundings. Useful skill when you're in prison, cuz then no one can sneak up on ya. I made sure that I stayed on my side of the bed. Didn't let my hands wander over to that supple body I'd been pretendin' to touch for a year. Probably even longer.
Cuz, I've been here three weeks. And I'm still in her room, still sleepin' in her bed. Just a heartbeat away from a fuckin' fantasy….
No big nasties to thwart. No big catastrophe to prevent. Big sigh of relief from the battle weary Scoobies. I think that fight against Glory took a lot out of all of us. I so wish she would have been here for that. I don't think I would have felt so alone and helpless. Maybe we all wouldn't have gotten so hurt. I can't guess. But I think I feel stronger and safer with her here. Don't ask me why.
Slaying has become my favorite time of day again. It's fun again. Because I'm doing it with her. Hmmm. Doing it with her… Yeah right, like that doesn't have a huge not so hidden meaning. Hey. I took Psych 101. I know that I wanna sleep with her. Well, I'm sleeping with her now. But I realize that I'd welcome the opportunity to find out for myself what she's like in bed. Really tired of hearing Xander's version.
Would she ever make love with me? Does she even do that? I don't know and I can't very well ask.
"Uh, Gee, Faith. Have you ever thought about making love with someone you really care about, like me? Or do you only fuck strangers?"
I don't think so.
I love slayin'. I love to tear things up and use my fists, my legs and my body. I even love the adrenaline rush of a vamp tryin' to take me out. And I've always loved the weapons. The stake is supposed to be my stock in trade. But I love handlin' the crossbow, the long bow, and just about any kind of knife. Maybe I just like to throw things, launch things, fire things off. B's good with all of it. I think she has better fight moves than I do. She's more disciplined. Sharper. I've always been kinda wild. But no one lets an arrow fly like I do. I would practice for hours with my watcher. Pickin' off vamps from a distance. She thought it was safer for me back then. I love the feel of the wood of the crossbow in my hands, takin' aim and pullin' the trigger. I love the long bow even more. Muscles stretching as my right arm holds the bow steady. The fingers of my left hand pullin' the string taut. And then sendin' that wooden shaft straight through a vampire's heart. I've got great hands. I'm fucking poetry in motion. But who wouldn't look wicked hot pullin' a longbow's string to the max?
And I can throw a knife with just as much accuracy. But unless we're fightin' demons, I don't use a knife anymore. Too many bad memories. But I still think they're cool.
Geeze, I thought it would be kinda quiet tonite. It's a fairly cool night and not many people are out. Except for what looks to be a bunch of 1970's era vampires across the cemetery. They must've just gotten into town. Look at ‘em. You think they would've at least dressed for the current times. God, the 70's were not pretty.
I'm about to attack, when one of them explodes into dust. Then another, and another. I look up and there she is on top of a mausoleum, firing at them with her longbow. She pulls arrows out of her quiver and cocks her bow so fast that the vampires don't even have a chance to run for cover. I know I should be killing some of the vampires. But I'm riveted by the display of her athleticism and grace.
She's poetry in motion.
Fuckin' perfect! Six for six! I'm like a goddamn machine. Like one of those guns where you turn the crank and it fires a bunch of rounds of ammo all at once. That ugly gang of vamps is dust in a matter of minutes. I hope B didn't mind me takin' target practice. Hey, where is she anyway?
That sexy little showoff. I'd be pissed about not havin' a kill if she hadn't been so much fun to watch. Look at her. She's so excited.
Damn, what was that? Whoa… vision's blurring a little here……
Hey! You goddamn fuckers! Sneaking up on a slayer like that. Shit, they whacked B pretty good. Now I'm pissed. Nobody hurts that blonde…..
Yeah, that's right, there's a slayer down, ya goddamn disco dicks. But guess what, assholes? Another slayer's still standin'. And did I say how incredibly pissed off I am right now?
Ok, tryin' to get up… slowly. What was I thinking? Gettin' all mesmerized by her and letting a couple of lame vamps get a jump on me. Oh, this is just perfect. She's never gonna let me live this down.
Wow, she must be really pissed. She's really tearin' up those two vamps. I wouldn't want to be them right now. She looks over at me as I start to stand. Staking the vampires quickly, she's at my side in a flash.
She has her hands braced tightly on my arms, holding me up. She looks so concerned and a little bit frightened. She's apologizing for distracting me. For getting up on that mausoleum and showin' off…..
I tell her that I'm all right. I can see that she's really worried. She hasn't let go of me. So I reach up and kiss her cheek and tell her thank you. She looks at me and asks me for what?
I don't know what made me do it. Maybe just for once I didn't think. But right there in the middle of that graveyard, I reach up again and I kiss her. I taste her lips, feel her softness. It's slow, and sweet, and I love it.
When I reluctantly release her, I look into those surprised dark eyes and say…..
I can only stare at her. I'm so shocked that she kissed me. I can't even react. I mean, I reacted. Believe me, I reacted. I fuckin' kissed her back. I'm not crazy. But I'm confused as to what she means, thanking me for everything. Yeah, ok. I just helped her out a bit here. But we always watch each other's back whenever we're slayin'. I may have gotten a little carried away because they jumped her like they did. But I'd rather die than let anything happen to her. Doesn't she know that? Oh… maybe she does…. Cuz, she's kissin' me again……
She's puzzled. She can't figure out that I'm thankful for having her back in my life. That I'm grateful that she makes all the burdens I carry that much lighter. That I'm glad she sleeps with me at night and smiles at me during the day. And yes, I know that she would protect me from anything, even if it meant dying in the process.
This is the person she is now. This is the woman I always knew she could be. And she doesn't understand yet that I love her for it.
And I can't resist tasting her lips again. Because not only do I know now that I really, really want to. But I also know now that I can.
Overload! Sensory overload! Buffy lips… against Faith lips… Danger, Will Robinson. Danger! Ok, so I like to watch cartoons and the Sci-Fi Channel. I like comic books too. It's no big deal.
But her kissing me is a big deal. It's fuckin' perfect. Except for my hands. I don't know my hands anymore. Cuz they just slipped around her and they're pullin' her up tight against me. I didn't tell them to do that. See? They're acting on their own. Not my fault. I don't know them.
She's embracing me. So I put my arms around her neck to keep us together. So that we can keep kissing. Now I can feel her hands moving down my back. One hand splays its fingers across my spine. The other is making sensuous little circles over the small of my back. If she drops them down just a few inches, she'll be fondling my ass. I won't stop her.
Fuck. I can feel her supple body all pressed up against mine. And those hands, that so do not belong to me, are starting to roam down her… Fuck. She's just lettin' me feel her up. You'd think she'd stop me when my hands cup her ass. But she just keeps kissin' me and playin' with my hair.
This can't be happening.
I pull away from her for a minute. I have to look at her face to make sure that I'm not back in prison. That I'm not imagining that another nameless blonde is her. But I'm not back in prison. And the woman in my arms really is Buffy Summers.
Ok, when did I die and how did I ever wind up in heaven?
She looks confused. Like she doesn't know why this is happening. That must be a first. I'll bet when she's been in situations like this before, she always knew what was happening and where it was going to lead. But with me she isn't sure. She hasn't made any assumptions since she's been back. She's made no overt moves to get what she doesn't know she can have. And she hasn't gone out and "gotten any" since she's been here either. Cuz, she's been in my bed every night and somewhere close to me every day. So I have the advantage of her being really horny right about now. And she'll come with me. I mean she'll come home and go to bed with me. Because now I know she wants to. And though I'd like to know all the answers to all the questions I have…. questions like… Can she love me? Will she stay with me? Will this mean anything more to her than a quick fuck to satisfy the post slaying lust? I want to know all those answers. But I won't ask her tonight. Whatever she wants this night to be…. a lovemaking marathon or just fucking each other silly…. It'll be perfect.
So I say for the second time in three weeks.
And I take her home with me again.