Faith had been lying on the mattress up in the loft since Buffy carried her there. She drifted in and out of sleep, never able to keep her eyes open for very long. Her energy felt as if it were draining with every breath that she took and only when Buffy was near her did she feel stronger. All she wanted was to go home and with every minute that passed, she was starting to let that hopelessness take over. She couldn't even look at Jackie anymore. There were just too many emotions that hit her, blindsided her already wounded soul. Just being there, trapped in a world between worlds, a dimension that might as well be Hell itself, was pulling her apart inside and nothing Buffy did or said would pull her out of it.

In the short intermissions from her dreams, Buffy would come to her with water and with soup, trying to no avail to get her to drink and eat to keep up her strength. By the fifth time, Faith finally gave in, almost too weak to feed herself. She saw the same hopelessness she felt in Buffy's eyes and it made her look away in shame. Buffy just moved closer to her and placed the bowl of warm potato soup on the floor.

"Come on, Faith. You can't do this to yourself. I don't know if I can be strong enough for both of us," Buffy whispered as she laid down next to her and ran her fingers over her tearstained cheeks. "You haven't said a word to me in what feels like days. I hate this."

"Sorry," Faith muttered as she closed her eyes, not feeling strong enough to turn away from Buffy.

"I miss you," she said softly, her lips barely brushing up against Faith's as she spoke. "I miss the way you'd kiss me, the way your eyes would light up whenever you smiled. I miss your touch," she sighed as she trailed her fingertips down Faith's arm and slipped her hand into hers. "I miss the way you'd hold me and the way you'd whisper into my ear all those naughty things you wanted to do to me next."

Faith let a small smile slip out as Buffy took her hand and placed it on her hip, encouraging her to touch, to hold. "You miss the naughty things?"

"Yeah," Buffy smiled as she kissed her lightly before she opened her eyes to look at her. "Ever since we've been here, I've become so attached to you in ways I've never been attached to anyone before. Just one look now and I can see the depths of your soul and I can feel it reaching out for mine. It is yours, you know."

"What is?"

"My soul, my heart," she sighed as Faith pulled her closer, holding her. "I never thought I could give myself to someone else, much less you, but its different now. Everything is different."

"You trust me with your heart?"

"I really do."

"What changed, B? You never used to trust anyone so easy, 'specially me."

"Can we not talk about this?" Buffy asked, pouting when Faith only responded with a frown. "I honestly don't know what changed. I keep asking myself that and none of the answers are ever the same. I don't want to keep asking myself those questions anymore either. I just want to be with you. Is that too much to ask for?"

Faith shook her head no. "Not too much to ask for, B. Sometimes I just like to ask questions I know there ain't no answers to."

"Come on," Buffy said with a smile as she helped her sit back up. "You are losing your strength, Faith. You need to eat. It doesn't taste all that bad this time."

"Right. This?" Faith said as she took a deep breath. "I've felt worse than this before."

"Well nobody should—"

"Buffy? I...never mind."

"You were trying to tell me something you weren't comfortable telling me before, weren't you?"

"Yeah."

"And I ruined it, didn't I?"

"Not like that's been the first time," Faith said, letting out a weak laugh as she reached for the bowl on the floor. "I was sayin' I've gone a lot longer than this without a solid meal in my stomach. Feelin' this weak's not the worst I ever felt before. Ain't nothin' I can't deal with."

"When we get home, I'm gonna cook you a nice big dinner," Buffy smiled as she watched Faith take a tentative sip of her soup. "I'll spend all day in the kitchen if I have to."

"You can cook?"

"A little bit, yeah."

"And what'll be for dessert, B?" Faith asked, the first playful smile in what felt like weeks slipping out as Buffy shrugged and smiled shyly. "You?"

"There's the Faith I've been missing lately," Buffy chuckled softly as she took the now empty bowl away from her. "Feeling any better now?"

"Yeah, but you didn't answer my question," she smirked as she laid back down and took in a deep breath as she waited for Buffy to answer. "I get a little B for dessert? Y'know, a little whipped cream, chocolate syrup...dripped all over your body..."

"I think you are definitely feeling a lot better than you did a few minutes ago," she said, laughing uneasily as she moved to lie down next to her again. "We should get some sleep while we can."

"Think of how...erotic it'd be," Faith whispered into her ear as she trailed her fingers over Buffy's stomach, ignoring her as visions of whipped cream and chocolate syrup poured all over Buffy's body filled her mind. "I'd take my time licking it off, teasin' ya 'til you're about ready to pop and all I'd have done was lick it off of you, barely touching you like I am now. And you're right, B. I'm definitely feeling better now."

"You are feeling horny now," Buffy laughed as she stopped Faith's hand from roaming under her shirt. "I'm serious, Faith. We need to sleep while we can right now. Those shifts are becoming more frequent and you heard what Jackie said during the last one—"

"I don't give a flyin' fuck what she said, B."

"She's your mother."

"Blood-relation only. My mother was a deadbeat drunk who let child services take me away from her without even fighting for me. She didn't care, not for a second, when they came to the apartment and dragged me out of there."

"That wasn't your real mother, Faith."

"Yeah, but she was the only one there until she wasn't. God, what a fuckin' way to ruin the mood, huh?" Faith scoffed as she rolled away from Buffy slowly, still feeling a little weak, but not as bad as before. She sighed as Buffy slipped an arm around her and gently kissed the back of her neck.

"So…" Buffy whispered into Faith's ear as her fingers travelled over the other Slayer's stomach. "I want to hear more about me being dessert," the blonde continued, digits pausing at the hem of the shirt.

"I know what you're tryin' to do, B."

"Is it working?"

"No."

She fought off the smile even though Buffy couldn't see her face. She couldn't let her mood shift for very long with Buffy there so close to her. It only shifted dramatically when she was left alone and that in itself felt dangerous to her. She was becoming dependent on Buffy a little too much and rather than fight it she'd been letting it take her over completely. She'd never been dependent on anyone in her whole life, always telling herself she was strong enough to look out for herself above all others. Buffy had been right about one thing. Everything was different now.

She tried not to slip back into the state of mind she was in before. She tried just to focus on the feel of Buffy's soft breath against her neck and her warm hand gently caressing her stomach with every breath they took together. The memories, her thoughts, every emotion she'd ever felt was going through her all over again in the last few hours, days—however long it'd been. While she dreamt, she could almost feel the edges of their world and this one blurring together and someone reaching out for her, trying to get her to listen. All she ever heard was breathy whispers, never able to make out the words.

"Girls?" Jackie called out from the bottom of the stairs. "Something is happening."

Faith and Buffy both got up quickly and ran down the stairs. They found Jackie standing by the door staring outside. She stepped to the side so they could walk out and what they saw felt like a long lost memory. Above the sky was blue, the sun was shining and the heat was no longer borderline unbearable.

"What the...hell?" Faith asked as she stepped outside and took in a deep breath of the surprisingly fresh air. "This ain't normal, is it?"

"Never happened before," Jackie said slowly as she stared up at the sky. "I almost forgot what it looked like. The sky," she whispered as she pointed up. "Henry told me this could happen when someone tried to reach into this world from another."

"Willow?" Faith asked as she turned to Buffy. "You think it's her, B?"

"Maybe," she shrugged in reply as she stepped outside and inhaled deeply. "Whatever it is, it's changing everything."

"It's not like the sky in the place I took you," Jackie muttered under her breath as she stayed in the doorway almost as if she was afraid to step outside. "It's almost real. Too real. Have we gone home?"

"No, Jackie. We're still here," Buffy said softly as she went back and led her outside slowly.

It hurt Faith to see Jackie so out of it, so lost and confused. It reminded her too much of herself and she walked off alone, leaning against the side of the building out of the bright sun. Buffy came over to her and stood in front of her, trying to catch her eye to no avail.

"What's wrong?"

"It's bright," Faith said under her breath. "Blinding almost."

"Okay, you are starting to sound a little too much like her," Buffy chuckled as she stood next to her and leaned against the wall. "We're going home soon."

"How do you know that?"

"I can feel it. Can't you?"

"Feel what?"

"Like something is trying to reach in and pull us out," Buffy said as she let out a soft sigh. "And can I just say how happy I am that I can actually just...breathe now?"

"Funny how quick you adapt to whatever environment you're stuck in, ain't it?" Faith said bitterly as she pushed herself off the wall, peering around to look at Jackie as she stood there near the door and stared up at the sky looking deliriously happy. "I'm goin' back in."

"Faith..."

"Don't, B."

Buffy didn't listen, instead grabbing Faith and shoving her hard against the wall. "Can you drop the attitude, Faith? You know I hate being here as much as you do. I'm just trying to..."

"Trying to what?"

"Survive," she said firmly but softly. "Your mood swings are really a pain in the ass, too."

"Right," Faith chuckled dryly, unable to find enough strength in her to push Buffy away. "B, back off, will ya?"

"No."

"B, I'm really in no fuckin' mood to fuck around right now. What if all this is just...somethin' out there fucking with us?"

"That was a whole lot of fucks in one sentence," Buffy chuckled as she tried to keep things light between them and tried to keep Faith from shifting into one of her darker, depressive moods. Faith gave up then and sighed as she shook her head and slid her hands over Buffy's waist. "Do you really think if something out there is fucking with us that they would send fresh air and sunshine?"

"Probably not."

"And look on the bright side, literally," Buffy said as she leaned over to look at Jackie. "Your mother—Jackie is really happy about this. Don't you think we should be too?"

"She's a fucking loony bird, B. Anything that's fuckin' bright 'n shiny makes her happy."

Faith suddenly felt like she was punched in the gut as she realized how she was speaking about the woman who was her mother. Buffy didn't look very happy with her for saying that either and she half expected Buffy to slap her across the face for being so cruel. She was still having mixed feelings with how to approach the whole subject of her mother being Jackie. She couldn't look the woman in the eye; she couldn't think of a single word to say to her even though she had a million questions she wanted to ask. She knew that most of her questions would never be answered, not with the state of mind that Jackie was in.

"I'm so tired of this place, Buffy. It feels like its draining me and turning me into someone I don't wanna be."

"I know."

"No, you don't know," she groaned as she found a bit of strength to push Buffy away from her. "I'm starting to get what the whole ghosts of the past bullshit is about. It was this place and now that we're here, it's really fucking with us. Thought for sure maybe it was a onetime occurrence since it didn't fucking happen again."

"Fight it, fight them, and fight whatever is inside of you, Faith. You might be weak physically, but deep down inside you are strong. You want to know how I know that? Because I feel it. I've always felt it."

"Whatever. Not up for some heart-to-heart, soul-searching bullshit talk right now."

She saw the punch coming just a split second before she felt it. It woke something up inside of her, something she'd buried before. It was the passion that came along with being a Slayer and it burned through her, creating an endless bound of energy she thought she would never get back so soon. She retaliated, throwing a hard punch at Buffy, slightly surprised she ducked out of the way fast enough. She smirked as Buffy stood there, cockily raising an eyebrow at her as they stared each other down.

They began to circle each other slowly, moving out into the open where Jackie still stood staring up at the sky. Faith cracked her neck before she made the first move, a perfectly timed roundhouse kick that sent Buffy flying across the open space. Faith was right by her, pulling her up by the front of her shirt and trying to duck out the way as Buffy's fist connected with her jaw once again in a backhanded punch. The punches they continued to exchange along with the kicks were hard, but not hard enough to hurt them too badly.

"Come on, baby," Faith snickered as she spit out a mouthful of blood. "You hit like a girl, y'know that? Show me what ya really got."

"Oh, we're going all out, are we?"

"Bring it on."

Buffy sent her stumbling back with a side kick square to the chest, nearly knocking the wind out of her. She was on Faith in an instant, her punches and jabs too quick for her to block all of them. Faith finally got the upper hand and pinned Buffy up against the wall, grinning as they both struggled to catch their breath. Faith tilted her head to the side, searching Buffy's eyes, seeing if she wanted to keep this going. They needed this—they'd needed it weeks ago, actually, but in Faith's mind it was never too late to work out the tension of the non-sexual variety.

Out of the corner of her eye she could see Jackie watching them, shaking in fear and confusion as she tried to figure out what was going on between them and why they were fighting. She took her full attention off of Buffy for that fraction of a second too long and doubled over in pain as Buffy raised her knee into her gut. She swept Buffy's feet from under her and they both toppled to the ground, laughing as Faith grabbed a hold of Buffy and kept her on top of her.

"Ya finished yet, B?"

"Just getting started," she breathed heavily as she reached up and wiped away the small trickle of blood from the corner of Faith's mouth. "Did I hurt you?"

"Nah," Faith smiled, feeling as if she had new life, new energy breathed into her over that short fight. "Shit."

"What?" Buffy asked before following Faith's gaze to a very shocked Jackie. "Oh."

"Why are you fighting?" Jackie asked, cautiously approaching them as they stood up.

"We were just fuckin' around," Faith said as she used her shirt to get rid of the rest of the blood trickling from the corner of her mouth. "Its okay, Jackie. This is normal shit between me and B."

"Normal? Fighting like that is normal?"

"Coulda been worse," Faith shrugged. "Actually, it has been worse. That was nothing."

"The way you two move…," Jackie said in awe as she stood there and stared at them. "I guess you weren't joking when you told me you were Slayers."

Faith shrugged again as she headed back inside, the bright sunlight beginning to give her a headache. That was her excuse, trying to convince herself that the blows to the head she'd received from Buffy weren't the cause of said headache. Her body was aching for more and she knew it would have been full out between them and then some if Jackie hadn't been there watching them. She grabbed the smaller jug of water off the floor and poured some in the glass that was sitting on the table. She listened as Buffy tried to explain to Jackie why they fought the way they did—that they weren't fighting because they were angry, they were fighting to get out the tension between them.

Faith couldn't stand to overhear that conversation, so she took the glass of water with her and headed up to the loft. It was a lot cooler inside now and she stripped out of her sweaty clothes and laid down on the mattress, watching the dust that shifted catch in the few beams of sunlight that shone through the boarded up window. She was laying on her side with her back turned when Buffy came up, so she could only hear as she stripped out of her own clothes and laid down behind her.

"Everything cool with Jackie?"

"Yeah, I think so. Still not too sure if she gets the whole Buffy and Faith history I tried to lay out for her in a nutshell down there."

"It's a pretty heavy history, B. Can't expect someone to just get it and understand it when ya try to explain it in a nutshell," Faith said softly as she turned so she was facing Buffy. "Shit, I can't help but wonder how fuckin' long we've been here for. Doesn't feel like too long, but ya heard what Jackie said before about how time isn't the same here."

"It isn't like time back home. Every dimension is different. God, I hope like a hundred years haven't passed. I don't think I could handle going back home to find everyone got old and died."

"I'm kinda hopin' we're not stuck here for what feels like a hundred years and by the time Willow gets us outta here we're all old and wrinkly with saggy tits and god knows what else and then find out it's only been a couple days."

"Nice visual, Faith," Buffy laughed as she poked her in the stomach lightly before sliding her arm around her and pulling her in close. "That's all I want, though, sometimes."

"Saggy tits?"

"Shut up," Buffy laughed harder as she slid her hand down to pinch Faith's ass to try to get her to stop laughing too. "No, I want to grow old. I want to live a full life. Always thought before when I died that I was finished, but things changed and it wasn't until we came here that I realized my life is so far from being finished. It's far from being over. It's just beginning."

Faith didn't know what to say to that and figured not saying anything at all was the best way to go. She didn't want her mood to shift drastically again and all she wanted was a moment with Buffy where everything else just slipped away and all she felt and saw was her. She wanted to let Buffy be the one to break the silence between them and she knew if she gave it a minute, she'd do just that and keep on talking. It never failed to amaze her just how easy it was for them to fall into any random conversation now. It felt like the most natural thing in the world just to lay there together, talking about almost anything and everything as if it was something that they'd always done together. It had gotten easy, almost effortless, and she knew it would get even easier over time.

"Outside, when we got into it," Buffy whispered as her hands traced random patterns over Faith's lower back, "I felt the power just turn on inside of us. It feels like I've gone too long without feeling that way."

"Sure have. Haven't had a chance to kick some ass since we've been here."

"Which got me to thinking," Buffy continued, causing Faith to pout just a little since she knew what was coming next. "We should really start using whatever time we do have to keep training. Just because we're stuck here doesn't mean we can slack. We can't afford to fall behind when we don't even know what could be waiting for us by the time we do get back home."

"Maybe all the baddies will take a fuckin' year off and decide the whole 'end of the world' bullshit is just not worth it anymore. Too much to ask for, ain't it?"

"A little too much to ask for, yeah," Buffy nodded then let out a soft sigh. "It would be nice, though, finally getting a break like that. Even a month. A month isn't too much to ask for, is it?"

"If we had a month, what'd you do with the time off?"

"I don't know. I've never given myself the luxury of thinking of that because I know it's never going to happen. What would you do?"

"Take Xander up on that offer to go camping. Nothin' beats sittin' around a fire, drinkin' beer and shootin' shit with friends in the middle of the woods somewhere."

"I nearly forgot about you two talking about that," Buffy said softly. "So much has happened since that night."

Buffy shivered slightly, the drastic change in temperature having started to affect both of them. Faith reached for the sheet and draped it over them, smiling at Buffy as she held her close and tried to keep her warm despite the chills running through her own body. She found it harder and harder to sleep without Buffy there with her and she smiled contentedly as she closed her eyes and breathed in deeply. She'd never be able to go back to the way things had been once they got home. She knew she'd never be able to be apart from Buffy for too long.

She wasn't sure how long she'd been sleeping for, but when she emerged from a dreamless sleep it was to Buffy lightly running her fingers over her stomach and tracing over the scar near her bellybutton. The sheets were thrown off and she felt a little cold as she looked down at Buffy's hand. She wanted to stop her, tell her it was done and over with. How she knew Buffy was thinking of that night, she wasn't so sure other than that subtle little feeling she had. She decided not to bring up that part of their past, knowing there'd be plenty of time to talk about those things in the future. Now was not the time for that talk. She wasn't ready for that talk.

She listened for a minute and heard the soft snores coming from Jackie down in her room. The sun was still out and streaming through the gaps in the boards over the window. She looked over at Buffy, watching as the sunlight streaked over her face and body. It never failed to amaze her how beautiful Buffy was to her. She'd always thought Buffy was beautiful, but now she saw a different kind of beauty in her whenever she laid her eyes upon her. Nobody had ever filled her the way Buffy did, nobody had ever made her feel so much, and nobody had ever made love seem very possible instead of the impossibility it had always been before.

The words 'I love you' were whispered almost silently from her lips as Buffy turned to look at her, smiling as she leaned in for a kiss. If someone told her when she came back to Sunnydale that she'd end up with Buffy like this, that she'd be in love with her and that Buffy would feel the same, she would've laughed in their faces and called them crazy. Now she couldn't imagine it being any other way and she wondered how she'd gone through so much of her life without her, without knowing what it was like to be in love with someone like her and without knowing what it felt like to be loved right back.

"Always thinking," Buffy chuckled softly as she swept her hand up Faith's back slowly. "You're thinking about me, aren't you?"

"Mm-hmm."

"What are you thinking about?"

"How...amazing this feels," she whispered, smiling shyly as Buffy's eyes lit up in the way that made her heart melt. "Thinkin' and wondering how I went so long without knowing how this felt. Don't even fuckin' care how fast things went for us. All I know is," she smiled again as she laid a gentle kiss upon her lips and pulled back, "I wouldn't trade any of this for the world."

"You can be so sweet sometimes," Buffy smiled as she ran her hand up to Faith's neck and twirled a few strands of her hair around her fingers. "I feel so at home with you like this and sometimes I think that if we never get back home, I'd be okay because I have you here with me and you make everything okay."

"Just don't tell anyone 'bout how sweet I can be, got a rep to protect," Faith chuckled, wiggling her eyebrows when Buffy just glared at her. "This ain't gonna change once we get back home, is it?"

"No, it's not going to change, Faith. Just as long as you don't start pushing me away again."

"Gonna try not to, B. Can't quite promise ya anything, though."

"What's going to happen once we get home, with Jackie I mean?"

"Dunno, B. Figure it's gonna be pretty hard for her to adjust to the world as it is now considerin' she's been gone for so long now. Kinda worried someone's gonna see her and think she really is fuckin' crazy and wanna put her in a home or somethin'. Don't think I could handle that."

"We'll take care of her. All of us. Giles will make sure nobody takes her away from you, from us."

"Sometimes it's easier just to keep tellin' myself that my mother is dead and gone, but then I know now it ain't true. Kind of a fucking head-trip, y'know? Don't even know how to talk to her, B. Don't even know what to fuckin' say to her sometimes."

Buffy just nodded, smiling in understanding as Faith sighed heavily and looked up at the ceiling. They laid there together in silence for a while, both falling away into their own thoughts. Faith just tried to stay focused on the soft caresses of Buffy's hand over her stomach. As much as she ached for a little release after their fight outside, she just wasn't in the mood to do anything but lay there with her. She was just a fraction of her old self now, part of her world no longer revolving around fucking another whenever she had an itch to be scratched. Although it was tempting, she just wasn't feeling it.

Everything was different and everything was still changing. It was a never-ending cycle now and one that always affected her mood. It was more than just a struggle to keep herself in a state of mind that kept her happy, mellow, and relaxed. Being stuck where they were and having gone so long dealing with it as well as she had at first was tearing her apart. She needed to go back home, they both needed to. Those whispers she heard almost constantly now were starting to become clearer. It sent chills through her body when she picked up on bits that didn't make any sense. The darkness still lingered inside of her, begging to come out, but shut out by the light she felt coming from Buffy.

Buffy's own darkness was there, she could feel it when she really let herself. It wasn't as strong as her own was and it didn't taste as bitter as her own did either. Buffy's darkness was different; it led her in a different way than her own had. Her darkness didn't make her bad, it just made her hate herself. She started to see that they were each other's anchors. They were keeping each other from giving in to the darkness that was like a drug, so tempting and so easy to fall into if they let themselves. She knew now why it was so easy to love once she'd let down her walls and let Buffy in.

"Shouldn't there be another shift by now?" Buffy whispered softly as she lifted her head to look at her. "It's been long enough."

"Maybe things changed? I mean shit, there's sun now when there wasn't none before. Maybe with the sun the shifts stop? Dunno," Faith shrugged. "Nothing makes complete sense here and even Jackie doesn't know what's goin' on, right?"

"She has no idea what's going on. She's confused, disoriented and that fight we had outside made her afraid that things are changing in a bad way. There was only so much I could explain before I lost her completely," Buffy replied as she moved away from Faith a little and laid back. "Don't you hear it?"

"Hear what?"

"Those voices," Buffy said softly as she looked over at her. "Always there, always whispering and yet never making any sense at all. But," she sighed as she turned back on her side and draped her arm over Faith's torso just below her breasts, "I hear them less when I'm close to you."

"Keeps the darkness away," Faith said under her breath, closing her eyes as Buffy's fingers trailed up over the soft curve of her breast and circled an already hard nipple. Even if she wasn't feeling in the mood before, just that one touch got her libido racing.

Buffy slipped her leg between Faith's, the undeniable wetness streaking across her thigh as Buffy leaned in to kiss her. "I don't want to talk anymore," Buffy whispered as she pressed her thigh hard into Faith's already throbbing, wet pussy. "I just want you. I want to be consumed by you. I'm addicted to your touch, to the feel of you."

She couldn't think clearly enough to speak and instead pulled her in for a hard, deep, and passionate kiss as she pulled Buffy more fully on top of her, their bodies flush against one another's. She gasped softly as Buffy pulled away from the kiss and began to lightly kiss over her bruised jaw. She raised her hips into Buffy's, trying to get some kind of friction as Buffy trailed light, wet kisses down her neck. It made her so wet whenever Buffy took the lead since she'd never trusted anyone enough before to do just that. She knew Buffy got off on being able to have complete control over her, but the sudden need and the words Buffy had uttered before about being consumed by her made it impossible to let Buffy have her naughty little way with her.

She took control, holding on to Buffy as she rolled them over slowly. Their lips met in a fierce kiss, tongues fighting for dominance as Faith pinned Buffy's hands against the mattress just above her head. She knew everything Buffy loved, the way she liked to be touched, be taken. She knew every spot on her body that made her squirm, made her cry out in pleasure, made those soft, breathy moans that drove her completely insane with want, lust, need, and desire.

She broke away from the kiss, just for a moment, so she could stare down into Buffy's eyes. There was never any reason to rush these moments they had together. It was all about passion, about just feeling one another and falling away from the rest of the world, becoming consumed by one another and letting all thoughts, all worries, and those whispered voices fade away. It was about forgetting, forgiving, moving on, and doing it together; no longer alone and never having to be again. So much could be said and felt with just one look and she knew she wasn't the only one who felt that way.

"She'll leave you."

"She says she loves you, but you know it's not true. How can she love someone like you?"

"You're bad. Evil. She can never stay with you when she realizes this is just a façade."

"She only thinks she loves you because you are stuck here with all of us. Lost souls, once lost, always lost, never found, and never loved."

"Faith?" Buffy asked as she reached up to gently cup Faith's face. "What's wrong?"

Faith shook her head, hovering over Buffy slightly, their bodies barely touching now. Those whispers were coming in loud and clear and she wasn't sure if they were the whispers that lingered there or if they were the voices in her head she'd learned to tune out while she was in prison. Tears burned her eyes as she stared down at Buffy and leaned into her soft touch, closing her eyes, feeling the tears spilling out slowly.

"Faith, what's wrong?" Buffy asked again, her voice wavering as if she was holding back her own tears. "Faith? Talk to me. Tell me what's going on."

"The voices," she whispered. "God, I can't—I don't want to do this anymore, Buffy."

"Do what?"

"Listen to them. How do I make them stop? I want them to stop. They ruin everything."

"Shh," Buffy said softly as she pulled Faith down fully on top of her, forcing her gently to lay her head down on her chest before she wrapped her arms around her. "Just ignore them, Faith."

"It's getting harder."

"I know," Buffy sighed as she kissed the top of her head softly. "It's getting harder for me too. The longer we're here, the louder and clearer the voices get. Don't let them in."

"I'm sorry," she whispered against the soft skin on Buffy's chest just below her collarbone. "I should've ignored it," she sighed out as she leaned up to look at her. "I should've just..."

She trailed off as she dipped her head down and caught a hard nipple between her lips; sucking gently as she tried to get back to the feeling she had before, the need and the desire to consume Buffy. To make her feel as if her whole body was being worshipped and devoured by her lips, her tongue, her fingertips, and her body itself. She inwardly cursed the voices she'd heard, trying to stay strong and stay in the moment she had created with Buffy.

She took Buffy soft and slow, her fingers dipping between her folds, seeking out her pulsating clit as her lips sucked and nibbled on the skin just below the underside of her pert breasts. Buffy's nails dug into her shoulders, alternating between trying to pull her up and push her down, not knowing what she wanted, how she wanted to be taken, to be consumed.

The torrential fire of emotions she felt not only from herself, but from Buffy, flooded through her, causing both of them to gasp and cry out in pleasure and not just because of the physical touch, but because of the way their souls began to mingle and intertwine. It filled her, warmed her, and fuelled her need for more. She felt Buffy clench around her fingers as she trailed her lips in hot open-mouthed kisses back up her body, over her breasts and up her neck slowly. She pulled back to watch as Buffy closed her eyes and bit her lip, the first waves of her orgasm flooding through her.

All it took was one soft touch from Buffy and she was right there with her, riding along the endless waves of pleasure and passion that flooded through their bodies. Even as the sun disappeared and the crack of thunder ripped through the sky, all she could see in front of her was Buffy, crying out her name ever so softly and holding Faith's emotions with her own. Keeping her steady, keeping her from flinging herself off that cliff into the unknown.

She would always have Buffy and she'd never let go. The voices knew nothing. They knew not the truth that spilled over in their hearts and in their very souls. Nothing could touch or break apart what they had now and she'd fight to the ends of the earth and beyond to keep Buffy as hers for always.

No longer feeling so hopeless, no longer feeling the despair she'd been feeling, Faith stood by the open door watching as the rain continued to come down. Before leaving a still fast-asleep Buffy, Faith had spent a few minutes just staring at her—wondering at her good fortune and asking herself how she ended up having something so great with Buffy. She'd always told herself she didn't do relationships, but apparently she was wrong about that and she knew that now. She'd never done relationships before because it had never been with the right person. She was still scared, just a little, of the things that would come for both of them over time. They were still in the early stages of their relationship, the part where they were infatuated with each other.

Even just thinking about it made her deliriously happy. She'd never felt that kind of happiness in her whole life and it just filled her the same way the darkness had. The happiness was filling a void inside of her, taking over, and she was allowing it instead of doing what she'd always done before and pushing it out. If they hadn't been sucked into the portal and ended up here, she knew things in their relationship would be different and that she wouldn't have all this time to think and over-think everything. Not just things between her and Buffy, but all the changes she'd been going through. And last but not least…Jackie.

She turned to look at Jackie as she walked out of her room muttering softly to herself, making her way over to the table to light the candle. She felt a bit of sympathy for the woman for having been stuck in this world for as long as she had been. Jackie had no idea what the real world was like and how much it had changed since she'd last been there. She knew that if she had to spend a little over twenty years in a place like this, almost entirely alone, she wouldn't have a single piece of her mind intact.

"Still raining, is it?" Jackie asked as she walked over to where Faith was standing. "I keep waiting for another shift. Something changed. Something has happened and something even bigger is about to happen."

"Yeah," Faith sighed as she turned to look back outside.

"Where is Buffy?"

"Sleeping."

"Ah," Jackie said with a nod as she stood across from Faith and leaned against the frame. "I was hoping we could talk, just the two of us."

"Talk? About what?"

"You," Jackie replied. "I don't know anything about you, Faith."

"You know some things about me, ain't that enough?"

"I know you are in love with Buffy, you are a Slayer, you have temperamental mood swings and you refuse to look at me after finding out the truth. There is a lot more to you than I know and I would like to know everything I can about my own daughter."

"What do ya want me to say, Jackie? Ya want me to tell you about my shitty childhood and even shittier life because of said shitty childhood?" Faith asked rather calmly despite the anger she felt boiling inside of her. "I don't wanna talk about any of that. Ever. Ya got that? It's painful for me and it brings up memories I would rather just fuckin' forget."

"You are never going to call me 'mom' are you?"

"No."

"I wanted to ask. I figured you wouldn't. It's okay," Jackie said with a soft smile when Faith turned to look at her. "You and Buffy have a lot of, er…history, don't you?"

"Yeah, we do."

"And you two managed to get over it and find something else inside of each other?" Jackie asked. Faith just responded by nodding her head before turning to look back outside to continue watching the rain as it fell steadily. "Your father and I, we had somewhat of a tragic beginning. Always fighting. I swear we went so many years in high school absolutely hating each other...until we didn't."

Faith knew what she was doing. She was trying to open herself up, tell Faith things she just didn't want to hear yet. She closed her eyes when Jackie reached out and very lightly touched her arm, trying to get her to look back over at her once again.

"I...I have no idea if your father is still alive. Maybe when we go home..."

"No. I don't wanna know who he is, Jackie. I. Don't. Care."

"You should care."

"Why?"

"Because he is your father, Faith. Don't you care about your family?"

"I have family. With Buffy and the others. Don't need any more than what I've got."

"But they aren't your real family," Jackie said softly. "I am."

"Y'know something? They are my real family now and I wouldn't change anything about it either. Heard a saying once that sometimes you hafta make your own family with the friends and people you surround yourself with. It wasn't a choice to make them my family. It just happened."

"I understand."

"Jackie," Faith sighed as she frowned, knowing no matter what she said she wouldn't be able to stop from upsetting her. "The whole family dynamic thing, I've never known what it's like. Never had that kind of luxury."

"I've forgotten what it's like," Jackie said quietly. "I've forgotten far too much and have missed far too much."

"Didn't miss out on anything good if ya ask me. The world is one fucked up place, Jackie. At least it has been for me. Really can't speak for anyone else."

"But you've found love in a great woman, can't all be bad," Jackie said with a smile as she wiped away a few tears. "Can I ask you something?"

"You're gonna anyway even if I say no." Faith muttered under her breath quietly.

"How long have you been...with other women?"

"Always swung both ways, never questioned it. Always went with whatever felt good, felt right at the time," she shrugged. "Does it matter?"

"No. Curious is all. Despite how much I've missed—your whole life—I still want to know who my daughter is and what she's become and who she will be in the days to come."

Faith looked back towards the stairs that led up to the loft, hoping Buffy would come down so she'd get out of talking to Jackie. She sighed heavily after a moment and motioned to Jackie to go sit at the table. She sat across from her, picking at the hole in her jeans just above the knee before she started telling Jackie almost everything she could bear to tell her. She skipped past most of her childhood and edited her teen years heavily aside from the stuff she told her that happened between her and Buffy and Buffy's friends. The more she talked, the easier it was and Jackie said nothing as she listened and hung on to every last word.

She told her about what happened with the Mayor, heavily editing a lot of it since she still had trouble dealing with falling so deep into the darkness at that time in her life. She told her how she'd spent nearly eight months in a coma, of the dreams she'd had and what it was like for her when she woke up. The urge to be good, to change her life, hadn't been there and when she tried to kill Angel, that was when the darkness inside of her really began to scare her. She told her how she turned herself in to the police, mostly because of Buffy and because of Angel. She skipped past most of her time spent in prison and went right to telling her how Wesley had come to get her, how she broke out of there to capture Angelus, and how she ended up going right to Sunnydale afterward to help save the world from the First.

She kept pausing, wondering if Jackie ever was going to say anything or ask her any questions. She kept talking, keeping it brief on the details as she told her about the time after Sunnydale—the ride to Cleveland and what they found themselves in shortly after. She told her about Henry, Laura, Julie and the others and that garnered a reaction from Jackie's otherwise emotionless face. She stopped talking once she got to the point where she and Buffy were sucked into the portal, reaching for the glass of water sitting on the table and taking a few sips.

She felt as if she had been talking for hours with how dry her mouth felt and she knew she probably had been. She'd told Jackie a lot and she knew it was a lot for her to take in. She didn't know how one minute she felt like she didn't want to tell her anything and then the next she was like an open book, or at least the cliff notes version of an open book. She heard the stairs up to the loft creak softly as Buffy came down and even across the vast space and the darkness she could see Buffy smiling over at her.

"I, uh…wow," Jackie said finally as she shook her head. "You sure have gone through a lot more than most people do in a lifetime, Faith. I can understand it all now. I understand you now."

"Makes one of us."

"You don't understand yourself?"

"No, not anymore," she replied as she shook her head, not once taking her eyes off of Buffy as she walked over towards them slowly. "Ever since I got that big ass dose of empathy I don't even know what I'm feeling and what I'm picking up from others."

"It can't all be bad," Jackie said. "The empathy, I mean. Have you ever thought of using it to your advantage?"

"How?"

"To better understand the people around you. You can know what they are feeling without having to ask or be told. You have this ability to understand human emotions. Not everyone can say that, can they?"

"She does use it," Buffy said as she sat down next to Faith on the crate. "Oh boy, does she ever use it sometimes."

"Oh," Jackie laughed as she shook her head. "I see."

"B?" Faith chuckled as she casually ran her hand over Buffy's thigh. "Talking about our sex life with my mother? Not something I'm into."

"Nor am I into hearing about it," Jackie said as she stood up and headed for the door that was still wide open. "I am going to take advantage of the rain and give you two some time alone."

"Good talk?" Buffy asked softly as soon as Jackie had disappeared outside.

"Yeah. Good as it coulda gone I guess," Faith shrugged. "Told her a lotta stuff I didn't think I'd be able to. Was easier than I thought it'd be."

"Sometimes—most times—things are easier than they appear to be before you try. I should know. Thought it'd be impossible for me to work up the courage to kiss you that one night, but I'm glad I did."

"Feels like that night was forever ago," Faith said softly. "And I'm fuckin' glad ya did, too, even though it scared the crap outta me thinkin' you'd regret it the next day cos you were all drunk and shit."

"Liquid courage," Buffy chuckled softly. "And a whole lot of regular courage too."

"Hmm?" Faith smiled as Buffy moved to straddle her legs, both of them unable to stop smiling at one another as Buffy leaned in for a soft kiss. "Y'know somethin', B? I like this. Just...bein' like this together."

"Like what? Close?"

"Yeah. It ain't all gonna change once we get back home, is it?"

"No," Buffy said as she shook her head slowly and ran her fingers through Faith's hair. "It is definitely not gonna change. You know why?"

"No, why?"

"Because I won't let it," she smiled softly. "I'm done taking steps back. I only want to keep going forward. No matter what we go back home to, this isn't going to change between us. It'll only change by becoming something more."

"More?"

"Like...maybe you could take me out on a date…or I could take you out on one, I'm not really sure how that all works," she said softly as she continued stroking her fingers through Faith's hair gently. "I promised you I'd cook you dinner and maybe after dessert we could...go somewhere, you know like a..."

"Date? Like going to see a movie? Maybe going out dancing?" Faith chuckled softly, feeling a little nervous yet slightly optimistic about it all. "Maybe a nice stroll through the cemetery under a full moon, stakes in our pockets, ready to..."

"God," Buffy laughed as she slid her hands around the back of Faith's neck. "I guess we really can't do anything normal, right? Slaying is a part of our life, might as well make it a part of a date, huh?"

"Might not have much of a choice."

"You know what I've been thinking?" Buffy asked, smiling when Faith just shrugged and shook her head no. "I've been thinking that maybe the reason I've never been able to have a lasting relationship before is because I've never been with anyone that understands what kind of a life a Slayer has to live. Maybe I should have tried this whole thing with you before. Maybe things would've been a hell of a lot easier."

"Wouldn't have worked out before. You and I both know that, B. We were at a different place in our lives before and now we're not, we're in the same place. Not just all symbolic and stuff, but for real too, yeah?" she grinned. "Nobody else is gonna understand the way we feel with the weight of the world on our shoulders all the time, day in and day out. Not even the newbies. They don't know what it's like."

"I hope they never do," Buffy whispered as she let out a soft sigh and leaned her forehead against Faith's. "I get this feeling that it's just you and me again, Faith. Something happened before we got sucked into the portal."

"Been feeling that too, trying to convince myself its cos we're here and...is it weird if I told you I could feel Kennedy the way I can feel you?"

"You could?"

"Yeah, just not as strong or intense. Didn't get that full body buzz that I get with you."

"You buzz?"

"It's like a drug. Thinkin' it's one of the reasons why I'm so addicted to ya, B."

"Okay, Miss Attention Span," Buffy laughed as she stopped Faith's wandering hands from slipping under her shirt. "We're having a conversation, not..."

"Not what?"

Faith cocked her head to the side, smirking as Buffy let go of her hands, biting her lower lip as Faith slid them under her shirt and over her stomach, slowly and tenderly caressing her soft skin as she watched her eyes darken slightly.

"I don't think I'm the only one with the whole attention span problem here," Faith whispered as she leaned in and trailed light kisses over the blonde's neck as she moved her hands upwards. "All I have to do is..." she trailed off as her hands reached Buffy's breasts and she smirked as the other slayer closed her eyes and whimpered softly. "All I have to do is touch you, B. You are at the complete mercy of me whether you want to be or not."

"It's electrifying," she whispered as she leaned back just a little, arching into the touch as Faith tweaked both of her nipples. "And you were right about the addictive part. I think I am too."

"Ya think?" Faith chuckled as she studied Buffy's face, watching as a wave of pleasure rolled through her. She very slowly moved her hands away from her breasts as she leaned in to kiss her deeply, thoroughly, as the rain picked up, the roaring sound of it making it difficult to hear anything else. "B?"

"Yeah?" Buffy breathed out softly, her eyes closed and her lips barely touching Faith's.

"Maybe we should go up to the loft and..."

"And?"

Faith just leaned back, smiling at her. She could feel the mood shift in Buffy, one she'd gotten all too used to since they'd been there. She'd always thought she was the only one who could be talking about one thing one minute and the next thinking of nothing besides getting naked and fucking 'till she lost all feeling in most of her body. Buffy was turned on by the littlest things, by a simple kiss or a look at times. She wondered once again if Buffy had always been like that or if it was because of her. She hoped it was a little of both.

"And what, Faith?"

"Ya really got to ask me that?"

"Simply insatiable, aren't you?"

"We both are," Faith smirked as she waited for Buffy to slide off her lap before she stood up. "Slayer stamina, babe. Even without being a Slayer, I could go for hours."

She pulled Buffy with her, unable to keep her hands from roaming and her lips from tasting every inch of skin she could reach. Buffy grabbed onto her and pulled her lips close to her own as they reached the bottom of the stairs. They could barely stop kissing long enough to make it up the stairs, but they managed, just barely, to make it up without tripping and falling over each other. Buffy pulled back from the kiss, halting them as they stumbled towards the mattress, and she licked her lips slowly as she looked her up and down.

"Strip."

Faith wiggled her eyebrows, her fingers playing with the button on her jeans. "And if I don't?"

"I'll rip your clothes off of you and you'll be walking around naked or with a sheet wrapped around you until we go home."

"Explain to me how the whole walking around naked part is bad?"

Buffy said nothing as she raised an eyebrow and placed her hands on her hips, waiting for Faith to strip out of her clothes. Faith waited too, seeing what Buffy would do if she didn't make a move, and it turned into a staring contest of sorts until Faith took a few steps towards the mattress and slipped off her boots. Buffy copied her move, her hands now running along the hem of her shirt as Faith slowly took off her own shirt. Buffy's shirt was off in seconds, joining Faith's on the dusty floor. She slipped out of her jeans slowly, her eyes never leaving Buffy's as she kicked her jeans aside. She stood there completely nude, a playful smirk curling over her lips as she watched Buffy push her jeans past her hips ever so slowly.

She knew this game and it made her skin tingle in anticipation of Buffy's next move. Buffy liked to be in control and she'd never seen anything sexier than in those moments where Buffy had her wrapped around her little finger, and her big finger or several. She chuckled softly as she thought about it and found herself being thrown down on to the mattress and Buffy sitting astride her stomach.

"I'm a little worried about something," Buffy whispered as she leaned in, seemingly about to kiss Faith but stopping just a breath away from her lips.

"What's that, B?"

"That everything is going to change when we go back home."

"Change?"

"Well," she laughed almost shyly as she sat back and stared down at Faith, who leaned up and propped herself on her elbows. "I mean, all we've been doing when we get the chance to be alone is..."

"Fuckin'?"

"Yeah. Once we're back home we're not...I mean, you know how hard it is to be alone for more than a few minutes at a time and I don't think we can get away with locking ourselves away for an entire day or two at a time."

"B?"

"Yeah?"

"Ya tryin' to ruin the mood here?"

"No! I was just...thinking. Sorry. Stupid thing to think about right now. I was supposed to be..."

"Turnin' into dominatrix Buffy?" Faith chuckled at the glare Buffy shot her. "Kidding, B. Although, the idea doesn't suck. Y'know, you being all dom, tyin' me up, smackin' me around a little 'till I behaved like a good little Slayer."

"You get off on it, don't you? When I hit you, fight with you," Buffy smirked as she leaned forward slowly. "I knew it."

"Hot little thing like you smackin' me around sure as hell gets me all worked up," Faith whispered huskily as she pulled her down closer, her grip on the back of her neck tight, but not enough to hurt her. "I know you like it fast and rough too."

"I like it slow...sometimes."

"But ya like it when it hurts so good it's not pain, but pleasure, don't ya?" Faith smirked when Buffy just stared at her, her expression unchanging. "I think," she whispered ever so softly as she moved to whisper it into her ear, "I think you need the pain so you can feel. I know you better than ya think I do. All that talk about slow is bullshit, B."

"You don't like it?" Buffy asked and Faith smiled a little when she could just feel the pout forming.

"Never said that," she whispered the words as she trailed her lips over Buffy's jaw, stopping when she got to her lips. "This is slow."

She felt the slight surprise that Buffy felt as she kissed her again, savouring the seconds that went by until Buffy pulled back and stared down at her, their eyes seeking each other's out in the darkness. She held her breath a little as she traced her fingers over Buffy's lips and up to her furrowed eyebrows, smiling as she watched Buffy relax a little.

"What?"

"This is...new," Buffy said softly.

Faith rolled them over slowly, grinning as Buffy let out a soft whimper. This was definitely new, for the most part. Faith knew what Buffy had meant, the soft caress Faith had just done meant a whole lot more than just that. It was the way they'd looked at each other in that moment, it was the intensity that flowed through them, and it was something else. Something very new to Faith and from the looks of things, it was for Buffy as well. Not just their naked bodies, but everything they were was being laid bare between them.

The roaring rain picked up outside, creating an atmosphere around them that felt like their own little bubble. Faith felt, just for a second, her whole heart clench as the strongest emotions she'd ever felt went through her, hitting her so hard she felt like she was about to faint. She kept herself steady, kept herself together. She had to stop thinking, but she knew it wasn't her fault that being so close to Buffy made her feel so goddamn much. She kissed her hard to stop thinking so much, and focused on just feeling Buffy beneath her.

Her lips made a slow descent down Buffy's neck, stopping to savour each kiss, each taste. She barely heard Buffy's moans over the roaring rain outside, but she could feel them with every touch. Hands went to the back of her head, pulling her into the other woman firmly as her lips wrapped around Buffy's nipple. Faith teased the bud with her teeth and tongue, biting a little roughly before she ran the tip of her tongue over the hollow between her breasts. She stopped to place a soft kiss just over her heart and smiled against her skin as Buffy's fingers gripped a handful of her hair before allowing her to continue on her torturous descent down across her stomach.

Every soft nibble against her skin elicited one soft moan after another. Buffy pleaded with her softly, whimpering as Faith stopped to look up at her. That feral look was still in Buffy eyes, the passion of it all could be felt in the heat that was blazing between their barely touching bodies. She knew from one look what Buffy wanted, what she needed, and she moved to hover over her, her face just inches from Buffy's as her fingertips trailed a blazing path down her stomach, stopping short just inches from her throbbing center.

Faith's lips claimed hers in another kiss as she deftly slid her fingers lower, teasing her still, feeling her hips buck up into her hand as she tried to get her to touch her where she wanted her to most. The kiss was searing yet nowhere near the heat they felt between each other as Faith's fingers traced the lightest of touches over her clit. Still teasing, but with purpose, Faith broke back from the kiss to look down at Buffy, making out every curve and dip in her face in the almost pitch black darkness as an intense amount of pleasure tumbled through her. When her lips met Buffy's once more, she thrust a single finger inside her hot, waiting hole.

Buffy's whole body arched into hers, twisting in pleasure as she lifted a leg and wrapped it around Faith's waist, pulling her closer and forcing her to move her fingers out from inside of her. She let out a low moan, nearly a growl, that sounded completely wanton as she felt Buffy's wet pussy slide against her own. Aside from the sounds of pleasure escaping past their lips and the roaring rain outside, they heard nothing else, saw and felt nothing else but each other. The intimacy being shared between them was far beyond physical. Far beyond anything words could ever describe.

Faith slowed her thrusts nearly to a stop, breathing heavily as she laid a gentle kiss upon Buffy's forehead as they began to reach their peak of a very intense orgasm together. Buffy's hands were now on her back, holding her close, her nails digging into the skin nearly hard enough to make her bleed.

"Don't stop," Buffy pleaded softly, her voice wavering slightly as she spoke.

Faith didn't say a word as she smiled and began to steadily thrust into Buffy, hard and then slow, finding it impossible to hold herself back completely from taking her fast and rough. A thunderous roar of thunder shook the building as they came, timing or coincidence, it just intensified those few short minutes where all they felt was each other and the passion that was almost painful as it blindingly tore through them with every gasping breath.

Faith couldn't find the energy to move as she lay next to Buffy, half her body draped over the other slayer and their legs intertwined in their own embrace. Faith's body was still charged, but the rest of her, her heart, her mind, her soul, was exhausted and begged for rest. Of all the times they'd spent lying on that mattress together, basking in the afterglow, she never failed to be amazed at the soft, gentle and loving caresses Buffy lazily traced up and down the arm she had draped over Buffy's waist. She didn't even have to fight her thoughts this time, nor fight the overwhelming emotions that seemed to do nothing but take her over lately. She'd found a moment of peace there in Buffy's arms and what would have scared her before just made her feel at home now.

"Thinking again?" Buffy asked softly as she ran her fingers over the side of Faith's head tenderly.

"When am I not?"

Buffy laughed heartily as Faith didn't move her head from her shoulder and instead placed a soft kiss just below her ear. They lay there just holding each other for what felt like hours, listening to the roaring rain outside that showed no sign of letting up. The air was sticky and hot once again, making their skin stick to each other wherever they were touching. Faith was the first to move, forcing herself to since the rumbling in her stomach told her she needed to eat or risk once again becoming almost too weak to even feed herself.

"Hungry?" Faith asked as she grabbed her clothes and slowly slid them on. "Ya think Jackie whipped up another batch of her super awesome soup?"

"God I hope so," Buffy replied, both of them laughing at the sarcasm both thick in their voices. "I keep dreaming of food. Is that crazy? Is that some kind of sign of cabin fever or something?"

"More like being stuck in some in-between dimension fever."

She looked down at Buffy, still lying on the mattress watching her as she slipped on her boots. Buffy hastily got up and dressed under Faith's watchful eye, neither of them doing anything but staring intensely at one another. Words could communicate their feelings up to a point, but these looks said so much more. They shared one last kiss before making their way down the rickety stairs. Faith reached for Buffy's hand halfway down and they just smiled at each other before nearly running into Jackie on the last step down.

Jackie said nothing to them, muttering under her breath, looking and sounding flustered as she walked past them to the door that led to the front. Faith and Buffy just exchanged a look of confusion as they made their way over to the table, the small fire in the hole in the floor burning embers now with the pot half-full of that god-awful potato soup. It was even starting to smell like nothing just as it tasted like dirt having been poured into the boiling water.

"Gotta eat," Faith muttered under her breath after she and Buffy had gotten themselves a bowlful of the soup they'd been living off of for who knew how long now. "God. You better have been fucking serious about cookin' some real fuckin' food once we get home."

"Dead serious. That'll come right after about three hours spent in a nice hot shower."

"You ever wonder how bad it's gotten out there without us around?"

"I try not to think too much about anything."

"Thinkin' can't be all bad, though. Part of the whole self-discovery thing. Or whatever," Faith shrugged, trying not to bring up what the counsellor in prison had told her. Buffy looked at her, the candlelight flickering over her face, showing nothing but curiosity as she tried to understand the meaning behind Faith's words. "Spent a few years doin' nothing but thinkin'."

"Oh. In prison," Buffy said, a statement, not a question. "You ever wonder if there's another reason we were brought here?"

"What reason?" Faith asked, knowing Buffy was purposely changing the subject.

"Like this was meant to happen? I don't know, I can't—it's hard to even explain it, but before we came here, I felt happy, sort of. I couldn't quite let myself, not even when things started between us. I tried, I really did. You think maybe there's something bigger at work here? Because I mean come on," Buffy laughed as she shook her head, "the whole thing with Julie and her family? Even though there was the immortality issue and the whole owning of the Gem of Amara thing, it was kind of..."

"Pathetic? At least it was right near the end. She was just another vampire, a little more bat-shit crazy than most, but that's all she was and her parents? Give me a fuckin' break, right?"

"I thought it'd be more, I thought it'd be harder. But it didn't matter what we did then, did it?"

"No," Faith replied. "It wouldn't have mattered. Either way we were supposed to come here."

"That's what they told you in that place, isn't it?"

"Yeah."

"It's what I keep hearing. Those voices. Telling me I have to find my true human nature, to let myself feel because this is what I was brought here for."

"You thinkin' it's the Powers that Be or is it somethin' else?"

"I don't know," Buffy said and let out a deep breath, tracing her fingers over Faith's shoulder as she stood next to her. "If it is the Powers that Be, I hope they know they've got one really pissed off Slayer on their hands for putting us both through this."

"Two pissed off Slayers and their family," Faith said pointedly. "We better get some answers soon. Have half a mind to go back to that place, that temple, and find out what the fuck is really goin' on around here and why we're really here."

"You can't," Jackie said as she approached them slowly. "You can only go when they call for you. They haven't called. Not since the last time."

"How many times have you gone there?" Faith asked angrily.

"A couple of times. Told me the same things you were told," Jackie said as she sat down on the other crate and let out a heavy sigh. "I know how frustrating it is not to know. I spent a long time not knowing and just trying to survive here. Henry, he—"

"It was his soul and hate to say it, Jackie, but his soul is just as fuckin' evil as he was."

"I know," Jackie nodded. "I still listened. I had no choice. Do you understand that, Faith? I had no choice. I've never had a choice. You two think you've been brought here for a reason? You ever wonder if that reason could be the fact that you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time?"

"No," Buffy said firmly as she glared across the table at her. "Nothing just happens, Jackie."

"You're wrong," she replied quietly. "Things do happen just because they happen. Sure, there are things that happen for a reason, especially here. Do you think you were brought here for the greater good? Have you thought that maybe you were brought here so you could find yourselves? That's what that witch told me—why she was sending me here—because I need to find myself."

"What a crock of shit," Faith muttered angrily under her breath. "You're fucking crazy, Jackie. Been here too long and now those wires in your brain are fuckin' crossed."

Faith saw the slap long before Jackie actually reached across the table and slapped her as hard as she could across the face. She just stood up, nearly threw the bowl in front of her to the floor, but restrained herself and just walked away. The rain was still coming down but she didn't care, walking out the back door to stand there in the rain, shaking as she tried to calm herself down. Things were starting to get bad, really bad. She could not only see it but feel it too. Jackie and her way of thinking, the way she just spoke at times; her craziness was starting to bleed into Faith. She knew if it was bleeding into her that Buffy was feeling it too.

If what Buffy had said about what the voices were saying to her was true, Faith wanted to laugh in their non-corporal faces. Human nature? What did anything they've been going through have to do with finding one's true human nature? If the Powers that Be were behind this, if they were, Faith knew there had to be a damn good reason for it. Then again, she also knew that the Powers that Be tended to fuck around just because they could. It was bad enough their dreams, the prophetic dreams and shared Slayer dreams, were cryptic. Now they'd been sent to a world between worlds where everywhere they turned there seemed to be some cryptic meaning or another.

She closed her eyes when Buffy came to stand behind her and wrapped her arms tightly around her. She didn't move, didn't turn to face her, she just kept her eyes closed and tried to relax as much as she could. Any other time, a simple touch from Buffy calmed her, but it was changing yet again. Everything was always changing. She was changing and it was just her. She could feel the essence of the Slayer inside of her growing and getting stronger with every minute that passed by.

Faith turned slowly in Buffy's arms, blinking through the rain as she stared at her, her eyes searching Buffy's as if she was trying to see everything she was thinking without having to say a word. One look and she knew she right and that Jackie was wrong. They were here for a reason and whatever reason that truly was, she was starting to see bits of it. Finding and holding on to their true human nature would make them stronger, faster, about as close to immortal as a mortal could be. It was what would keep them alive once they were returned home and it was what would help them love like they never loved before.