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Chapter 18- Fuck This

"The number you are trying to reach has been changed to an unpublished number. Goodbye." Faith closed her eyes and frustrated tears slipped out of her eyes, she pressed `End Call' on her phone and let it slip out of her hand. It had been a week since Buffy left her apartment, madder than anything she had ever seen in recent memory.

Faith had only been kicked in the balls, on purpose, one other time, and it was at the beach, so their foot barely made significant contact.

But even with the excruciating pain she was in, and the fact that she pissed blood for two days and had to go to her specialist for a check-up, was not what hurt her the most.

It was how she could let things get to that point. How she could have hurt Buffy so bad that she wouldn't take her calls and then change her number.

And now there was the Cordelia problem. That scared her the most right now. She wasn't sure what Cordelia expected her to do. If the child was hers she'd be there for them, with support and love. But there were two things she knew she was sure of, she sure as hell wasn't moving back in with Cordelia, and she wasn't going to stop trying to get Buffy to talk to her.

She lay back on the couch and remembered her conversation with Hank the night before:

"Faith, I don't know where she is, and even if I did you know I wouldn't be able to tell you."

"I know, Hank. I just…I'm…"

"Hey, as someone who's gotten to know you over the past few months, I'd say `Hang in there kid, she'll come around.' But as Buffy's father, who knows what she's like when she gets like this…I can only say cut your losses and move on. I know that's harsh and it's going to hurt to even think to do that…" He trailed off for a moment, Faith could be heard trying to get her breathing under control. "Do you know Charlie tried to contact her last year? He wanted her to meet his daughter, he named her Elizabeth."

"Whoah, really? What the fuck?"

"Yes, apparently he was still in love with her and that caused problems in his relationship. The woman he had the baby with left him, and he moved back to the Caymans. Buffy was going to be down there for a publicity event and he had his daughter with him, he contacted her through her publicist and asked that they meet, just as friends to catch up on their lives."

"She never returned his call…" Faith said.

"And she had the event moved to Las Vegas."

Faith closed her eyes and tried to stop the sob from coming out of her mouth, but she failed and he waited while she struggled to compose herself. 

"I know I fucked up, Hank. But I know Cordy's lyin'. Deep down I feel it."

Hank sighed, "The test results that came across my desk looked pretty positive. My last service as your lawyer will be to draw up a custody agreement. Should you choose to marry Cordelia, it won't be needed, but if you just live with her, you'll need it to protect your rights."

Faith was still feeling the sting of hearing Hank tell her that he'd no longer be her lawyer, she hadn't thought of that as an option, but she guessed it was only right.

She answered him with sureness and a slight bit of annoyance, "I'm not going to live with her, I'm not going to marry her. She's lyin', it's not my kid."

"Your new lawyer will need to file a request for a paternity test to be taken as soon as the child is born."



"I just wanna say…thanks…thanks for all you've done for me. I'm sorry I fucked up, and I'm sorry I hurt your…" She started to cry again.

"I know, Faith. And I'm sorry that I'll no longer be your lawyer, I feel it's only right considering the circumstances. I'll send you some recommendations, I don't do that for just anyone, because those people are competition, but I like you…despite what's happened. I just can't associate with you."

"I know," She managed to choke out. "Please tell Joyce…" She trailed off as her voice broke.

"I will, I will," Hank said reassuringly. "How are the family jewels?"

Faith calmed herself enough to reply, "Sore."

"Buffy was an All-American soccer forward in her Junior and Senior years in high school. She even won a scholarship to play for Northwestern."

"But she went to USC…"

"She wanted to stay close to home and go to school with her best friend."

Faith remembered something and sat up on the couch suddenly, her heart was racing.

"Willow!" She said.



Willow heard the machine pick up and go to voicemail, for the fifth time that night.

She sighed and looked at Tara, who had a mug of tea in her hand.

"You're going to have to tell her."

"I know, but I don't want to," Willow pouted and then perked up. "Can you do it and let me be your slave for a week?"

Tara narrowed her eyes at her, "It would be worth more than a week, and no…" She handed Willow the mug of tea. "You need to help her."

Willow took the mug and sighed, "I don't think I can, I mean, I've seen her heartbroken, and this is…Tara this is like…okay can you imagine…if Kermit the Frog got Janice pregnant?"

Tara visibly shivered.

"Exactly," Willow said, knowingly and went to sip the tea.

"Will, that's for Buffy, go take it to her."

Willow gave her best puppy dog impression, but Tara wasn't having any of it. She fixed her face into resolve and turned Willow around, pointing her to the door of the kitchen.

Willow took a deep breath before going through it.

"Hey, Buff," She said in a tenuously cheery voice. "I made you some…well Tara made it and made me bring it, tea." She held it out to Buffy who just sat on the couch, looking stunned. "You really should drink some. It's good."

Buffy looked up at Willow, at first like she didn't know her, and then she looked surprised.


Buffy's face contorted into a painful mask and she doubled over, crying into her arms.

"Oh, Buffy!" Willow said in sympathy and put the mug onto the coffee table. She sat on the couch and pulled Buffy into her lap and let her cry.

Tara silently came out of the kitchen, picked up the box of tissues from the end table and set them next to Willow, and then left just as quietly.

Willow looked at the back of her retreating girlfriend and beamed proudly, then looked at the mess of her friend in her lap and her heart broke all over for her again.

After a while, Buffy's sobs lessened and Willow stopped rubbing her back and said, "You can tell me anything you want."

"H-has she tracked me down yet?"

Willow nodded as she answered, "I guess I shouldn't keep my number listed in the phone books like that. I mean…especially not as Willow Rosenberg, `cause ya know, there would be a lot of W Rosenberg's in the book anyway, but no, I had to be different to stand out…"



"It's okay, it's not your fault." Buffy sighed and picked her head up, taking the tissue Willow offered her. She dabbed at her eyes with it. "I'd really be surprised if she didn't try to go through my family and friends to get to me."

"Are you going to talk to her?" Willow said, trying to be hopeful.

Buffy let out a small laugh and shook her head.

"What would I say?" She narrowed her eyes at Willow, and it caused the her to back up a little. "'Thanks for doing the one thing I had asked you not to'? `The one thing you knew would destroy me'?"

Willow looked almost as if Buffy were saying those things to her.

"I'm sorry…" She said without thinking.

"Don't be," Buffy looked around the room. She let out a sigh when she saw the tea on the coffee table. "It's probably cold by now."

Willow pulled away from Buffy and picked up the tea, "I'll go heat it up."

Buffy put her hand on her friends arm, stopping her, "You don't have to."

Willow was unsure of what to do next, she finally decided to put the mug back down on the table.

When she set it back down, Buffy moved back into her arms and hugged her tightly, Willow was momentarily stunned and then closed her eyes and hugged back.

"I don't know what I'd do without you, Will…"

Willow laughed, "Probably go to your uncle."

It sounded like a joke, but Willow knew that Buffy's uncle could talk sense to her in times like these, and she was surprised that she wasn't at his house right now.

"I did, he told me to take Faith back, that's why I'm here."

"Oh," Willow said, again slightly stunned.

"I mean…it's not like I came here as a last resort…"

"No, I get it, Buff."

Buffy sighed and pulled out of their hug.

"I just needed someone on my side for a little bit."

"Your parents?"

"Well, I finally convinced Daddy to drop Faith as a client, but they're insisting I wait to pass judgment on her until after Cordelia has the baby." Buffy stopped and looked at her friend mortified. "Oh God, Will…when did my life become a soap opera?"

Just then Tara came out of the kitchen with a plate of chocolate chip cookies and a large clear pitcher of milk.

Buffy and Willow looked at each other and laughed.

"I figured if it was gonna be one of those visits, we'd act accordingly," Tara said with a smirk. "By the way…she's called two more times, just in case you wanted to know."

"Thanks, honey." Willow said and reached for a chocolate chip cookie. Her hand was swatted away by Tara.

"They're for Buffy."

Buffy let out a small laugh, "I like your woman, Will. She's fighting you for me."

"Umm…" Willow was a little uneasy about the phrasing of that last sentence.

"I mean she would fight you…well…now what did I mean?"

"I think you meant that I'd hurt anyone for you," Tara added helpfully.

Willow's eyes got big.

"What is it, honey? Did you forget something?" Tara asked.

"I guess I have to go up there and kick her ass now…but she's strong…I mean she did you standing up…" Willow realized what she had just said and looked at her friend in horror. "Not that I remembered that you told me that or anything and used it as fantasy during…shutting up now."

In spite of her pain, Buffy had to laugh at her friend.  

"So, your Dad's no longer her lawyer?" Willow asked after a few moments of silence.

Buffy shook her head, "I told him that as his daughter I think he was making a poor choice of clients. Besides, she's got lawyers she knows, her Uncle Wesley is a lawyer."

"But doesn't he represent your uncle and his estate?"

"Okay…what's your point?"

"Your uncle is on Faith's side…"

"You don't think, Will! Why would you think such a thing?!"

Willow shrugged.

Buffy got up off of the couch and ran into the kitchen, she dialed her mother. She impatiently waited for the three point two seconds it took to go to voicemail.

"Mom, call me back when you get this, I'm at Willow's, it's an emergency!" Buffy hung the phone up. After a few moments the phone rang and she picked it up.



`Oh, God! Who doesn't have a phone with caller ID anymore?! I'm gonna kill, Willow.' She thought.

"I have nothing to say to you, Faith," She said after a while.

"Can you at least hear me out for a minute?"

"I don't know why I should. I told you, it's over. You should start believing me when I say that."

"I know, I talked to your Dad, I know what's up."

Buffy's brow furrowed, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I just mean that I know you don't want to ever have anything to do with me again."

"Oh," Buffy was surprised. "You're lucky you're getting this chance."

Faith's heart swelled at the idea of that. She closed her eyes.

"C-can I see you?"

"Don't push it."

"I'm sorry, Buffy."

"I know, Faith, I know how much you're sorry, but did you ever stop and think how sorry you'd be if you ever got yourself into this position before you did it."


"I want to know, when! When did this happen, and don't fucking lie to me, again!"

Faith closed her eyes and thought back:

"Hey, stud, you just finishing up here?" Cordelia said as she walked up to Faith at the location of her friend Amy's documentary.

"How'd you know I was here?"

"Well, you weren't at the production office, or your apartment, so I took a wild guess."

Faith let out a small laugh.

"I'm predictable, huh?"

"Nah, I'm just glad I managed to hunt you down."

Amy came over to where they were, "Hey, Cordelia, how's it going?"

"Fine, Amy." She smiled at her and then looked empathetic. "So sorry to hear about your, Mom."

"Thanks, she…it was a shock."

Faith gave Amy a hug from the side and then a look to Cordelia who shrugged.

"It'll be okay, stay strong."

"Thanks, Faith." Amy said, and then gained her composure. "Really. For everything. If it weren't for your help with this documentary, I really wouldn't have been able to finish it."

"It's something I've been wantin' to do for a long time, I'm glad you got a chance to tell the story."

"Me too," Amy gave her a smile and another short hug. "I'll call you and let you know about the voice over stuff."

"Cool, just give me enough notice and I'll work it in to my schedule."

They said their goodbyes to each other, and then Cordelia waited near the door so that Faith could finish saying her goodbyes to the crew and some of the teens they had been interviewing.

"Hey, Faith, that your girl over there?" One of the boys said.

Faith looked back at the picture Cordelia presented, her hair was tied back into a bun, and she had a tight fitting glen plaid suit with a black satin shirt underneath. The skirt for the suit barely came down to her knees and the black sheer stockings she wore didn't hide any definition in her thigh muscles. She looked every bit like the C.E.O of a large company who could buy and sell people at will.

And she was fixing a mischievous look in Faith's direction.

"That's my manager," Faith said, trying to fight off an erection.

"Damn, I wish she would manage me," One of the braver girls in the group said, making the kids around her laugh. "You know what I'm sayin' homes?"

"Yeah, I know what you're sayin', Cari. But it ain't like that with me and Cordy."

"It should be, damn, look at those legs," Caridad said, with an appreciative look.

Cordelia had the sense to know she was affecting many people with her beauty at the moment, and looked away, striking an oblivious, yet seductive pose.

"Hey, you're not supposed to look," Colleen said, as she came up behind her girlfriend, giving her a small punch to her shoulder blade.

Caridad scoffed, "Ai, mami, don't hit. You know I look but I don't touch."

Colleen put her arms around her girlfriend's waist.

"You better not, or else you'll be calling me, leaving messages, crying for me to take you back."

"What the…damn you better stop watchin' those Spanish soap operas with my moms. You. Are. Buggin'."

Caridad turned slightly and they shared a look, and then sealed it with a short but loving kiss.

Faith looked at the display and smiled.

"Okay, guys. I really gotta take off," She looked back at Cordelia and sighed. "I guess my ride's here."

"I'll say," Caridad said and then broke into song. "If you wanna go take a ride wit me…" She mimed riding a horse, but it clearly  symbolized doing someone doggie style while slapping their ass.

"Cari!" Colleen slapped her a little harder.

"I'm out," Faith said, laughing and shaking her head. "Hey, I'm ready."

Cordelia moved off of the wall, "Did you get your license back yet?"

Faith nodded and Cordelia tossed her the keys.

"You drive," She smirked.

Faith looked at the key chain, it was the Benz. She sang the same song that Caridad had just been singing, as they walked, "If you wanna go and get high wit me, smoke an L in the back of the Benzie…"

Cordelia looped her arm through Faith's and asked, "What?"

"Nothin', Cor. Just somethin' one of the girls was singin'."

"Those girls back there, are they all gay?"

Faith looked back at the group who had come out of the building to wave at them, she shielded her face from the sun and waved back.

"Some of `em are guys, and yeah, they're gay."

"Oh," Cordelia said and took her seat, she looked over at Faith who had just sat in the driver's seat and was adjusting it. "Transvestites?"

"Transvestites, Transgendered, Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, and friends," Faith smiled at her.

"And you're doing a documentary on them?"

Faith nodded her head to the side, and looked out of the windshield as she put the key in the ignition and started the car, "They're doin' it on me."

Cordelia looked at her puzzled, "On you?"

"Yeah," Faith got a proud smile on her face and pulled out of the parking lot. "It was supposed to be about a prominent transgendered woman in L.A., but she got cold feet and backed out. Didn't want to come out as an m to f transgender."

"And what's with the boys and girls club?"

"Some of those kids have been beaten up by their families, shunned by their friends and peers. This center was opened so they could have a place to come to, and Amy wanted me to work with some of `em."

"Doing what?"

"Gettin' `em off the streets, and talkin' about who they are with confidence and respect for themselves. Caridad had been almost killed by her cousin for sayin' she wanted to be a guy."

"That pretty Latina?"

"Yeah, the one who gave you the eyes," Faith laughed. "She's been on the street since she was thirteen."

"Her girlfriend too?"

"Nah, they met here, I kinda got them together."

"You're a regular Don Juana," Cordy smiled.

"I have an eye for who would be good together," Faith shrugged and indicated to make a left turn. "What can I say? I'm good at it."

Cordelia put her hand on Faith's leg, "That you are."

"Hey, I'm drivin' here, Cordy."

"And I'm getting a cheap thrill, so hush."

Faith tried not to think of the hand on her leg as she drove towards her house.

"Take me home, Faith."

"How am I gonna get home?"

"I'll take you tomorrow."


"C'mon, Faith…let's have a girl's night, we haven't had one in a while."

"You were just over my place a few nights ago."

"No, I mean like a real `Cordy and Faith' night, with swimming and gourmet food, and relaxing and wine." She wiggled her eyebrows at that. "The whole nine yards."

Faith thought of Buffy, and thought of turning down Cordy, but she figured it wouldn't hurt to have some fun. She was feeling good about herself, especially with the work she'd done for the documentary and she felt like celebrating a little.

She also reasoned that it had been almost a week since she'd seen Buffy at the hotel, after the whole club incident with Angel, and it wasn't like she was planning on cheating.

"Alright," Faith sighed and Cordelia did a fist pump.

"You won't regret this, Faith. Besides, you've earned a little down time, you've been working non-stop lately, and poor baby hasn't been getting any action," She rubbed Faith's thigh.

"Hey, Cor. Let's get one thing straight, we ain't gonna fuck. Okay?"

"Who said anything about fucking? I was just talking about the fact that you've been mainly helping Oz around the office, not doing movies…"

"Okay, I was just bein' clear."

"It's crystal, okay?" Cordelia said, valley girl like.

"Okay," Faith relaxed a little.

Cordelia kept her hand on Faith's thigh.



The first thing Faith noticed when she woke up the next morning was that she had a piercing headache, and she was naked.

That wasn't anything new, though, sometimes when she and Cordy had their `fun nights', she'd stumble to bed taking her clothes off as she went.

What was new about this was someone was naked in the bed beside her.

She sat up and looked over to her left.

"Fuck…" She muttered. `Cordy must've been tryin' to get me to the guest room and just decided to bring us in here. Shit, how much did we drink?'

There were empty bottles of Perrier Jouet on the furniture around the room. Faith counted five.

After a quick knock on the door it opened and Faith pulled the sheet up to her chest.

"Good morning, ladies! I trust you had a good sleep?"

"Huh?" Cordelia said from her spot on the bed. She held her head and didn't bother to cover up. "Fuck…Dennis! Don't you knock, like EVER?"

"I did knock, and when there were no protestations I opened the door," Dennis moved gracefully over to the bottles picking them up one by one and putting them into the plastic bin he had in his hand.

"Yeah, what'd you do? Knock once and then float on in?" Cordelia turned over so her breasts weren't exposed.

Faith had to laugh, Dennis had a graceful way of walking around that made it look like he was, indeed, floating.

"Will you be wanting breakfast?"

"I don't know…" Faith said. "My head's kinda all messed up. Might not be good for me."

"Well, judging by how many bottles I've taken out of the pool area and the entertainment room, and in here, I'd say you'll need food to soak up all that alcohol."

"Dennis! Just go make us something."

"Bagels and cream cheese?"

"With the fresh lox? Yes, please!" Cordy said.

"Very well," Dennis said and gave a slight bow before letting himself out of the room.

"Ew, Cor. How can you think of eating that shit after all we drank."

"All you drank, I had like…well…I can't remember, but you were pounding the glasses back like they were water."

Faith tried to think, "I only really remember swimmin' and the meal, and then havin' a couple of glasses."

"Yeah, well, you got a hold of that J that Xander left here and that was it."

"Oh, fuck, I smoked? Really?" Faith put her hand on her chest, took a breath and blew air into her mouth from her lungs, she could smell the marijuana on her breath.

"I was amazed you could still get it up after all that," Cordy said as she rolled back over onto her back and stretched out, her hand seductively making its way to her pussy.


"You were like an animal last night, Faith. Don't tell me you don't remember that?"

"Fuck no, I don't remember that," She reached down and put a hand on her penis and then closed her eyes. The tell-tale signs of the morning after were there. Her cock was flaccid, but sticky, and her balls hummed with pleasure.

"I was a little disappointed that you didn't perform the, `Faith special'," Cordy said with her hand cupping her mons. "But that's nothing a little douche can't handle."


"Came inside me? Yeah."

Faith narrowed her eyes and tried hard to think, everything was a hazy mess inside of her head.

"Hey, don't worry, I'm on the pill."

"B-but," Faith sputtered.

"Faith, I said don't worry. I'm not gonna tell anyone."

"Why did you…"

"Hey, I tried to get you off of me, but you insisted, and I was feeling…ya know…I was drunk too, don't pin this on me!"

Faith shoulders slumped and she hung her head.

"I'm not pinnin' anything on you, Cor…I fuckin' just—"

There was a short knock on the door and in burst a tray carrying Dennis, who again, looked like he floated into the room. He set the tray on a tri-pod stand and pulled a linen napkin out from one of the holders in the tray. He shook it out with one hand before placing it over Cordelia's chest and putting the tray over her hips.

"Come in," She said to Dennis with contempt.

"Breakfast is served, Milady," He said with a flourish.

"Thanks?" Cordelia said, attitude still firmly in place.

Faith still had the sheet pulled up to her chest. She looked stunned.

Dennis excused himself with another bow and floated out of the door again.

"Are you gonna get in on this?" Cordelia said, not so lady-like with a mouth full of bagel and lox. "It's all fresh, the cook makes these bagels in our brick oven."

Faith looked to her side and watched Cordelia scoop lox high onto her bagel. As some of the cream sauce dripped off the end of the bagel, her stomach turned and she pulled the sheet off and ran into the toilet to be sick.

Cordelia sighed and put her food back onto the tray, set it to the side and got out of bed. She made her way into the bathroom and bent down next to Faith.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just peachy, Cor," She said with some difficulty as she braced herself for another round of emptying the contents of her stomach into the toilet. "Shit," She said when she was done. "My fuckin' head is killin' me."

"I'll get you some aspirin when it's safe."

Faith was sick one more time and then she sat on the floor.

Cordelia's bathroom was bigger than most living rooms, and she couldn't prop herself up against anything so she just lay back on the cool marble.

"You want me to run you a bath?"

Faith shrugged.

"C'mon Faith, what's the matter?"

"You know what the matter is, Cordy."

"Why? Are you married or something?"

"No," Faith spit out.

"Well then what?"

"Nothin'…I just…"

"Am I that disgusting to you?"

"What?" Faith tilted her head back and looked up at Cordelia.

"Well, I mean, here we have a fantastic night of sex, you're not attached to anyone and you act like you're disgusted."

Faith sighed, then noticed, with some embarrassment that come was leaking from Cordelia's pussy.

`Fuck we must have just finished before I pulled out of the fuckin' haze.' Faith thought.

"You're leakin' there, Cor," She pointed out.

"Thanks to you," Cordelia said, icily. She went over to the cabinet and took out a box of douche. She affixed the nozzle and prepared the bottle to give it to herself.

Faith pulled herself up off the floor and crawled over to where Cordelia had just sat down on the bowl.


Faith bent down and took the bottle from her, "I'll do it for ya, Queen C."

Cordelia smiled at the nickname.

"You don't have to."

"Nah, it's all good, I got it. `Sides, it's the least I can do I guess."

Cordelia spread her legs and allowed Faith to give her the douche, she watched as Faith's eyes grew big at the amount of come that apparently flowed out of her. She had pushed it out with her vaginal muscles.

"We didn't just have sex once last night…"

Faith nodded her head and pushed the nozzle into Cordelia's vagina.

`That would explain it,' Faith thought.

"Like, I said, Faith. I'm on the pill. I won't tell anyone. I have someone I'm trying to land too. It wouldn't do well for our relationship if they knew about this."

"It's okay, Cor," Faith thought about what she had said to her earlier. "And I don't think havin' sex with you is disgustin'. I'm just mad at myself for passin' out like that, and not rememberin' it. Told myself I wouldn't get fucked up like that again."

"I know, and I'm sorry, I just saw some of the old Faith, from Switzerland and I got nostalgic."

"It's not your fault, I should know when to say when."

After the douche was over, Faith took a shower, had some bagels, kissed Cordelia goodbye and took a cab back to her place with her tail between her legs.



"So that's it, that's the story?" Buffy practically shouted. "You got drunk, fucked Cordy multiple times and blacked out?"

"Yeah," Faith said, not so happy that her story was sounding like it was going to get her deeper into trouble.

"And this was when?"

"About a week after the club thing."

"And about a week after we parted at the hotel and I told you I loved you and that we'd be together soon."

"And then you blew me off for the next two weeks."

"Oh, so when the man I've spent the last five years with parents die in a horrific accident, and I try to help him get better so I can tell him I'm leaving him, I can't get a couple of extra weeks to do that?"

"I didn't mean…"

"No you know what, Faith? Fuck you, and fuck your story. I don't give a shit that you were so fucking plastered and fucked up on God knows what else that you didn't know or care to know what the fuck was happening to you. I'm mad that you put yourself in that position in the first place."


"No you fucking listen to me, Faith! You knew what happened with Charlie, you knew my fears about people leaving me, about people betraying me. You spat on me and made me a victim all over again."

A red anger boiled up inside of Faith, "You're a fuckin' victim every day, Buffy! I didn't make you that way, Angel did, and when you fuckin' wake yourself up to that you--"

The line went dead and Faith threw her phone across the room, then went and punched the wall that it had just shattered up against.

Buffy stood there holding the receiver in one hand and her finger on the hook. She was trying to fight the urge to slam the receiver into the phone base and it was making her shake.

"Buffy?" Tara said softly coming up behind her. She took Buffy's finger off the hook and her pulled the receiver out of her hand.

"That was…"

"Faith I presume?"

Buffy nodded.

"So, that went…" Willow said, coming up to both of them.

"Like a train wreck," Buffy sighed, shakily.

"I'm so sorry, Buffy."

"She tried to twist this whole thing around on me."

Willow and Tara furrowed their brows.

"She did?" Willow asked.

Buffy let out a hard edged laugh, "She tried to…I guess she doesn't really know me. Probably never really did."

Willow reached out and rubbed Buffy's arm when a tear slipped from her left eye.

Buffy laughed again, this time it was a sheepish one, "I must look…"

"Amazingly good for someone who has cried as much as you have these past couple of days," Tara said, confidently and then stuttered when Willow looked at her curiously. "Y-ya know, I-I guess."

"Well, guys, I'm over it."


"Over it," Buffy said with a confident look. "I think it's time we finished planning that wedding."




Buffy looked at Willow like she was a sandwich short of a platter, "Angel, me…you're my matron of honor…ring any bells?"

"Buffy, are you sure?"

"Never more…sure," She said as she moved passed them and left the kitchen.

"Oh my God, Tara. I think she's really lost it this time." Willow said with her hands on her forehead. "She gave me the `Stepford grin'."

"Willow, let's get out there before she hurts herself."

They looked at each other and ran for the living room.



Faith picked herself up off of the floor after having laid on it for the past hour. She was numb and needed to pee.

She looked around for her phone and then remembered what had happened to it.

"Fuck," She said as she looked around and saw its destroyed carcass lying grotesquely on the floor with the glass shards of the display screen strewn around it. She went to her drawer and picked up another phone and plugged its charger into it, and then into the wall.

After waiting a moment to clear her throat and think of what she was going to say, she dialed.


"I think I need to come home," She said, without even a compulsory greeting.

"What's happened?"

"Will you have me picked up at the airport?"

"O-of course. Can you tell me what's wrong?"

"I'll need a new lawyer, and a…a private dick."

"Is that supposed to be…"

"It's a private investigator, is that gonna be a problem?"

"Not at all."

"Thanks, I guess I'll see you soon."

"Do you need…"

"Nope, that's it, later," Faith said, calmly and then added, "Thanks, I appreciate it."

"No problem."

She hung up the phone and set it carefully on her bureau, making sure it wasn't too close to the edge.

After a few more moments of staring at nothing, she went into the kitchen to get the dust pan and broom.

To sweep up the shards she had made.



 One night, a couple of years back…

"Whatcha lookin' at there, Jay?"

"These movies you have, they are of that American porn star…Bunny?"

Faith let out a chuckle, "Buffy."

"Yes…I see her one time. She only does…blow job?"

"Mostly, yeah."

Jana went quiet for a moment, "We watch all these other movies, how come we don't watch these?"

Faith shrugged.

"Don't do that, Liebchen…tell Jay why."

"I didn't think you'd want to see something like that."

Jana put her hand down and rubbed Faith's crotch.

"Does it give you big erection?"

Faith laughed, and Jana looked her in her eyes, smiling, "Does it?"

"Maybe," Faith said, and blushed.

"So let's watch…" Jana said, with an eyebrow quirked in challenge.

"Okay," Faith acquiesced.

As soon as Jana popped the tape into the player and pressed play, Faith started to get hard, Buffy was looking at the camera and blowing it kisses. The camera man had told her to show off her outfit and she was doing different poses for him.

Faith lay back on the bed and Jana laid beside her, she watched Faith's reactions to the girl in the movie.

She smirked as she saw the front of Faith's jeans get tighter and her cock became clearly outlined in the material.

As someone was introduced into the scene on the TV, Jana moved to pull down Faith's zipper.

"Let me help you, Liebchen. Oooh look, you're so hard already."

Faith watched as Buffy kissed the man's cock and then stuck her tongue out to lick at it. At the same time, Jana pulled Faith's dick free from her boxer-briefs and licked it as well.

"Mmmm," Faith moaned and kept her eyes on the TV, the style of the video was POV and Buffy kept looking up at the camera as she sucked on the cock in the video. Faith got lost in those green eyes many more times than she could count.

As Buffy started to deep throat the cock on the screen, Jana did her best to deep throat Faith, but she could only manage getting half way down and used her hands on the base of the shaft to make up for it.

She looked back at the screen.

"My God, she is breathing with cock in her throat," Jana put her hands up in frustration. "I can't do this."

Faith narrowed her eyes at her girlfriend.

"What? Why? What happened?"

"I know you like her…you prefer to watch her giving head, rather than ask me for it."

"Jay…that's not true."

"It is true, Faith."

"What the hell brought all this on?"

"Don't get mad…"

Faith sat up and softened her voice, "I'm not mad, Jay. I'm just trying to understand."

Jana hung her head and shifted her eyes around, then looked sideways at Faith, "You would think it's stupid."

Faith kissed the side of her head, "I wouldn't think it was stupid, I only think that about you when I teach you German."

Jana hit Faith on the leg, "Oh no, I teach you more English than you teach me German!"

"You hit me…"

Jana's eyes got big, "I'm sorry!"

"I'm kidding," Faith smiled at her and then pulled her underwear back up over her hips. "Now, what's up?"

"The sky," Jana said mischievously.


She sighed, "I read what you write about her yesterday,"

"In that email to Diana?"

"I didn't mean it…" She looked away.

Faith let out a long breath and sat back on the bed.

"You really want to go to California and meet her?" Jana asked.

"I don't know…I…"

"You don't like Jay?"

"What? Oh my God, Jana, don't say that. I like you…" Faith leaned over and rubbed her arm. "I do, it's not…I don't know, I wasn't gonna really do anything."

"Tell me about it, Faith. About her, what makes you like her so much?"

Faith waited for a long while as she thought about what she could tell Jana that wouldn't make her run out the door.

"I don't know…I just…I feel like I've known her all my life you know?"

"Kind of like when I tell you about Lisa?"

"Somethin' like that," Faith smiled. "I know it's crazy, and I'll probably look like a stalker, but I just, I want to meet her. Maybe it will like cure me from thinkin' about her."

"I think when she see you she'll fall madly in love instantly."

"Ha!" Faith exclaimed. "Yeah, okay, that'll happen."

"You're very lovable, Faith. You don't see this?"

Faith shrugged.

"Again with this shoulder thing, you have a…how you say…gnat?"


"Yes, that."

"No, and apparently I don't see it. And anyway she's got a boyfriend, they've been together a while, probably married by now and I wouldn't mess with that, if I could even meet her which is probably highly unlikely."

"You don't know, I am getting many more fans, I might go to America to star in my own show there."


"Yes, movie."

"Does your contract let you do things like that?"

"Not at the moment, but maybe one day…"

Faith smiled and nodded at her, she pulled her by her arm until she was close to her face.

"You're very talented, you'll be a big star one day."

"Bigger than, Buffy?"


"You're such the jerk."

"A jerk."

"Yeah, a big jerk."

Faith pulled her closer, "Gimme a kiss." She whispered and Jana obliged.

She rubbed Faith through her jeans and pulled back from the kiss after a while.

"Maybe I star in movie with Buffy one day?"

"Oh my God my heart might explode then, seriously, that would be like two worlds colliding."

"Make big explosion…"

"Oh yeah, baby, huge," Faith winked at her and wiggled her eyebrows.

"Should I finish?" Jana said with a head tilt towards Faith's crotch.

Faith looked like she had to think really hard about that, then pushed Jana onto her back.

"Nope, I'm gonna eat you until you scream for me," She said as she swung herself over Jana and pushed her arms back into the bed. "Hope you don't have to do any voice work tomorrow, `cause you ain't gonna be any good to anyone."

Jana smiled as she felt Faith decending her body.

She laid back and closed her eyes and waited for her world to be rocked.



Buffy punched her pillow in frustration, it wasn't right. Nothing was right.

She had even tried to get herself off to stop the voices in her head because she usually could fall asleep after she came.

Her eyes kept flicking back to the DVD that was on the desk, the one that Oz had just sent over to Willow and Tara's house.

She was surprised she didn't throw it in the trash, but she figured she shouldn't not support her friend Oz and see how everything turned out, just because Faith was an asshole. Besides, she didn't own this particular copy.

After another hour of tossing and turning in Willow and Tara's guest bed, she finally got up and put the DVD inside the all in one device they had in the room.

She watched with a critic's eye as Faith and Jana had sex and she was pleasantly surprised to see she was over Faith. Her body hadn't even reacted to the sight of her, except to be angry at her.

Because of what she had done to her, not because she was with Jana now.

When she saw Faith kneel in front of her and tongue her pussy on the screen, she felt an itch in hers and tried not to scratch it.

As she called for Faith to suck her clit, Buffy couldn't stand the nagging itch and moved her panties around a little to help satisfy what was bothering her.

She kept her hands away from herself for the most part, and she was proud.

Until the end scene in the movie.

The one where Cock ultimately saves Lois and the world, from Lex Longer and then takes her back to her Palace of Cockstals to fuck her in every position there was ever conceived.

Her hand made its way to her pussy as Faith was grinding her cock into her pussy on screen, in the missionary position and was telling her that she loved her and that she loved fucking her, and that she was going to come soon.

"Oh fuck me deep, Cock. Cream me, I fucking want that come in my pussy."

She watched herself have an orgasm and tweaked her clit, giving herself a few pleasurable pulses.

Faith leaned down and sucked her nipple, sending her orgasm into overdrive and she started to rub her pussy in spite of her better judgment.

She closed her eyes and could almost feel Faith hit her g-spot with each stroke, and when Faith said, "Oh fuck, that pussy is so fuckin' good, I'm gonna come, baby. I'm gonna come. You want it?"

"Yesss," Buffy hissed.

"It's gonna be a lot," She warned.

"Please, give it to me!"

"Fuck, I'm comin', baby. Oh I'm comin', fuck that's a lot, it's pourin' into you, Lois. I fuckin' love you."

She placed her other hand over her mouth to muffle her cries of pleasure, and smiled as her pussy pulsed and throbbed with her first real orgasm she had since she'd been with Faith during the movie.

When she opened her eyes, she saw Faith whispering to her, and her whispering back. She remembered what they had said to each other then.

And she cried.



Chapter 19 - Come Undone


"Faith?" Buffy's voice was gentle but firm.

"Mmmm," Faith moaned.

"Faith, get up, we've gotta get ready. Uncle Q is waiting."

"Unnnnh," Faith groaned, and then smiled as she felt Buffy trail her hand down to her ass, she quickly turned over so that she was now touching her naked crotch. "Ooooh."

"Oh, you!"

"Mmmm, me…" Faith breathed out, her eyes still closed.

"Please wake up," Buffy whispered in her ear.

Faith's eyes opened quickly.

"Sorry to disturb you Ma'am, but I'll need you to fasten your seatbelt."


"We're coming up on a lot of turbulence, the Captain has put on the fasten seatbelt sign."

"Is everything okay?"

"It's fine," The flight attendant said with a radiant smile.

`Would you even tell me if it wasn't?' Faith thought. `Guess it's better to be ignorant when you're about to crash into the side of a mountain.'

She shuddered at that thought.

The plane lurched back and forth, and a couple of the overhead bins popped open. Faith saw a young mother holding her baby tight, and she could hear her whispering the Lord's Prayer.

Faith closed her eyes and joined in the prayer for the woman and her baby.

As quick as it began, the turbulence stopped. The captain asked that everyone remain buckled and seated for the moment. And after a few minutes the over head light went off.

Claps were heard throughout the cabin.

The young mother caught Faith's eye and smiled. She smiled back.

It was good to be alive.

Her thoughts ran to Buffy and her heart beat erratically. She remembered the dream she was having before the flight attendant woke her.

`Fuck,' She thought. `So fuckin' insane.'

An hour later and she was back in L.A. making her way through customs.

"Is that all you packed?" Andrew said as he walked up to her.

"All I'll need, I'm not stayin' long," She went up to him and hugged him.

"You hope," He said warningly.

"Fuck, if I'm here for more than a week, shoot me."

"Is it that bad to come back and see your old buds, your old pals, your amigos?" He said, and then pouted with a crazy grin.

She laughed and shoved him a little.

"Nah, you guys are great, but shit…" She trailed off.

"I can't even begin to imagine."

There was silence between them as they made their way to Andrew's car out in the parking lot.

Finally Faith drummed up enough courage to ask, "Heard from Buffy lately?"

Andrew looked nervously at her and chewed his lip for a moment before nodding and answering.

"She was in the other day, doing her part of the publicity for SuperMoan."

"She look okay?"

"Tanned, ya know, post honeymoon like."

Faith's stomach dropped, she knew that would eventually be brought up and she was glad it was finally out in the open.

Still, it stung to hear it, even though she'd known, through Wesley, that it was going to happen. The wounds it caused were still fresh.

 She shook her head and willed herself to say something, "As long as she's happy…"

"Okaaaay," Andrew didn't wish to continue the conversation and hoped it would be changed soon.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing, you sound convincing," He said innocently.

"Fuck man, let's just get me to my hotel. I really am so looking forward to five days from now. You have no idea."

Faith got in the car and leaned back in her seat, closing her eyes. She listened to the music Andrew had on his radio and tried to clear her mind of everything.

I am thinking it's a sign
That the freckles in our eyes are mirror images
And when we kiss they're perfectly aligned
I have to speculate
That God himself did make
Us into corresponding shapes
Like puzzle pieces from the clay

True, it may seem like a stretch
But its thoughts like this that catch
My troubled head when you're away
When I am missing you to death
When you are out there on the road
For several weeks of shows
And when you scan the radio
I hope this song will guide you home

They will see us waving from such great heights,
"Come down now", they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away,
"Come down now", but we'll stay...

I tried my best to leave
This all on your machine
But the persistent beat it sounded thin
Upon listening
And that frankly will not fly
You will hear the shrillest highs
And lowest lows with the windows down
When this is guiding you home

They will see us waving from such great heights,
"Come down now", they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away
"Come down now", but we'll stay...



"Are you kiddin' me?"

"I'm sorry Ma'am your room was reserved for yesterday, we've given it away."

"I made those reservations," Andrew said, narrowing his eyes at the desk clerk. "I told you the sixteenth."

Faith put her hand down on the counter heavily and muttered, "Which was yesterday."

"It was?"

The desk clerk look relieved and nodded.

"We're all booked, but if you give me your number…"

"That's okay," Faith said and shouldered her bag. "I'll find a place."

As they left the hotel Andrew said, "I'm so sorry, Faith. I've been so out of sorts lately with everything, I can't believe I did that!"

"Andy, it's okay. It's partly my fault, all this shit wouldn't've mattered if I hadn't fucked up."

"Faith, stop that right now, okay? You can't keep doing that to yourself."

"What? I fucked up, I know it, I can't lie to myself."

"It'll all work out, okay?"

"If you say so, dude."

"I have a small place, but you're welcome to…"

"Nah, I appreciate the offer, but I think I know where I can get a room," She said as she put her phone to her ear and listened. "Jonathon? Hey, it's Ms. Lehane. I'm doing well, thanks." A smile lit up her face. "I need a room. Excellent. Okay, I'll see you in a little bit, thanks."

"'Ms. Lehane'?" Andrew smiled.

"I know, sounds odd doesn't it?"

"Not that it's because of…"

"No I know, it's just most people call me Faith, it's weird to hear the whole thing. So grown up like."

"Where to, Ms. Lehaneeee?" Andrew drew out her name.

"Burbank Marriott, and step on it driver," She smiled.

He insisted upon parking and tried to go in with her.

"What if they don't have your reservation held?"

"Andy, I just made it."

"But what day did you give them?" He narrowed his eyes at her.

"Shut the fuck up, you're the one that does shit like that, not me."

Andrew smiled at her brightly.

"Hey, dude," She said seriously. "Thanks for pickin' me up. And if I knew I were stayin' here in the first place, I wouldn't have had to bother you, sorry."

"No, bother at all, Faith. I'm glad to help. Kind of made my night," He said and then got out of the car to give her a big hug. "We all miss you, it's not the same."

"I miss you guys too, but ya know…"

"Yeah," He said, sniffling a little.

"Don't tell me you're cryin' man."

"No?" He said, clearly lying and making no bones about it.

She had to laugh at him, he was too cute. She squeezed him a little tighter.

"Woah, Mssss. Lehane! I am not that kinda girl!" He said pulling out of the hug and closing his jacket tight around his body.

"That's not what I heard, Shirley. That's not what I heard." She said as she picked up her bag. "You change your mind, you call me, okay?"

"Okay," He said with a faux innocence laced mischief in his voice. He put an imaginary phone up to his face. "Riiiing, riiiing. Hello? Are you there, Faith? It's me, Andrew…" His voice was what could only be described as ethereal.

She laughed and shook her head, "Good night, Margaret," She said with a smirk.

He started to fake weep, "Beautiful inside and out, huge cock and she knows Judy Blume. Such a catch."

"You're twisted dude, I'll see ya at the studio tomorrow."

"I'll pick you up!"

"Alright," She thought a moment. "Wear something that shows more leg though."

He laughed and got into the car as she turned and went into the hotel.

"She really is a great catch," He lamented as he turned on the car and got ready to pull out of the hotel's driveway. "Now how do we get Buffy to remember that?"

"Ms. Lehane, good evening. So nice to see you again," Jonathon beamed at her as she went up to the desk and he put a little clip board and a pen out for her.

"It's great to see you too, Jonny."

"I reserved your suite for you."

"You didn't need to do that…"

"Well, it was kind of a necessity, oddly enough we're all booked. There's some convention in town, along with a conference on climate control, and would you believe a Gary Coleman fan club get together?"

"Shut up," She laughed disbelievingly as she handed the pen and the slip she had to sign back over to him.

He indicated behind her with his head and she looked around discreetly and saw one of the hotel's guests sitting in a lobby chair saying, "Whatchu talkin' `bout, Willis." to people that had on T-shirts with Arnold's face and the famous caption on top and underneath.

She let out a short laugh and shook her head at Jonathon.

He lowered his voice, "Congratulations on the movie, I've seen it," He put a hand to his chest. "I don't know, too many times to count."

"Oh really?" She said with an eyebrow raised.

"It's you and Ms. Summers in a takeoff on Superman, porn style…" He then looked at her contemptuously. "No brainer, duh."

"Thanks man, I appreciate it."

"Any," He lowered his voice to a conspiratorial tone again. "'Special' visitor I should be expecting for you?"

"Not this time, Jonathon." She sighed and looked at him with a sad smile. "I really wish that weren't true, but it is. In fact, if there are any visitors, especially of the female variety, you make sure they don't get up there without me knowing. Got it?"

He nodded, "Got it, and Tucker," He said catching the eye of his co-worker who had been listening to her last statement. "Will make sure of that as well."

Tucker nodded his head and gave his assurance also, "That won't happen again."

"Thanks, guys. You're the best." She said as she shouldered her bag and made her way to the private elevator.

She passed the familiar security guard, "Kakistos." She said with a head nod and a smile.

"Good evening, Ma'am. You're looking well."

"You too," She said and put a hand up to her chin like she was feeling a beard. "Like the goatee, it suits you."

"Really? Tell that to my wife, she says I look like a creep," He shrugged. "Whadda ya gonna do?"

She laughed and stuck her key card into the slot.

"Nothin' ya can do."

"Have a good night."

"You too," She said with a smile.

Once in the elevator her smile faded and she let out a shaky breath.



"Faith, I know you're probably surprised that I'm calling you. I know you're in town and I need to see you. It's important. I wouldn't be calling unless it was. Get in touch with me. I'm at my parents."

Faith looked out the window with a drink in her hand as she listened to the message for the second time.

After it was finished playing she drained what was left in the glass and went into the bathroom to brush her teeth and wash her hands and face.

She checked herself in the mirror and decided that while she just spent more than half a day traveling, she was pretty refreshed, and ready to face anything. She'd need that for this meeting.

As she walked back into the room, she swore she could smell Buffy. Her heart did that seizing and starting thing that it was accustomed to doing, even before they broke up.

She cleared her throat and called down to the desk to order her a taxi. When that was done she slipped her leather jacket on and went down to wait in the lobby.

The room was too cold for her, and it had nothing to do with the temperature.



"Ms. Lehane," The butler, Collins said with a nod of his head and narrowed his eyes.

She didn't like him and he didn't like her. She felt Cordelia's parents had hired a thug and had him be their butler for the added muscle. Especially since Dennis was so flighty.

"I was told to meet her here tonight," She explained.

"In the kitchen, expectin' you."

"Are her parent's here?"

"No, but the entire wait staff is so don't try any funny business," He said as she walked in and stopped in the lobby.

She let out a scoff, "What? I'm a serial killer now?" She muttered.

"She's waitin'."

"Thanks," Faith said, without even the barest hint of thankfulness in her voice.

"Cordy," She said when she went into the kitchen. "I'm here, what's up?"

"When did you get here?"

"Just now, what's up? Is it about the baby?"

Cordelia got up from the breakfast nook with the paper in her hand and tossed it at Faith. She went to the kitchen cabinet and pulled out a bottle from it.

"Read it, read it out loud, aren't they such a pretty couple?"

She poured herself a glass of the twenty five year old scotch her father kept in there for when he came home after a particularly stressful day at work, which is why Dennis refilled it about three times a week.

She lifted her glass in the air, "To the adorable couple."

Faith was busy staring at the picture in the style section of the paper to notice what Cordelia was doing.

"Go ahead, read it."

"It's nothin' I haven't read before," Faith muttered.

"Isn't it wonderful?" She said with faux cheer.

"Cordy? This is what you dragged me outta my hotel for? I thought…" She finally looked over at her and noticed what she was drinking. "'The fuck are you doing?!"

Cordelia smiled, she looked like she already had a few, "What? I'm toasting their marriage." She said as she lifted the glass in the air.

Faith launched herself across the room and pushed her up against the kitchen cabinets, smashing the glass out of her hand, it shattered and Cordelia cried out."You need a fucking shrink! You abuser!"

Faith pressed into her hard, "You're fuckin' drinkin' and you're two months pregnant?!"

It started as a giggle, and then turned into a full belly laugh. Faith thought she snapped something in Cordelia's head or cut too much oxygen off to her brain, she let up on the pressure and then finally let her go.

"Yeah," Cordy said still laughing, and shook off the liquid from the hand. "Right, I forgot." She straightened out her sleeve and the rest of her black lace penoir.

"You forgot? How the fuck could you forget?! What the fuck is goin' on here, Cordy?!"

Cordelia went and sat at the breakfast nook and pulled the paper over to her again. She smoothed out the picture of a smiling Angel and Buffy in their wedding attire, looking for all the world like `The Happy Couple' and stared at it.

Faith watched her with a sort of horrified curiosity as she talked to the picture.

"I almost had it, it was mine, and I don't know what happened or when…but it vanished."

"Cor," Faith turned to her. "Cordy, how much have you been drinkin'?"

She didn't answer.

"Fuck, Cor, you know that's not good for the baby. You wanna lose it?"

Cordelia laughed again, "The baby. The baby was my idea." She looked at the picture. "Yes it was, wasn't it? You remember when I told you about that idea and you smiled at me like I was a genius?"

"'The fuck are you talkin' about?!" Faith balled up her fists. Her stomach was churning.

Cordelia picked up the paper and pushed the wedding picture at her, "He told me I was a genius and then we made love." She said wistfully.

"Cordelia, I'm only gonna ask you this one more time before I start beatin' the shit out of you. What. The. Fuck. Are. You. Talking. About?"

"I'm talking about `the plan', Faith."

"What plan?"

She stared at her for a second, and then said dismissively, "Doesn't matter now."

Faith picked up Cordy by her arms and brought her face to face with her.

"You fuckin' think I'm playin'?!"

"I think you're hurting me!"

"What's `the plan' Cordy?!"

"The plan was sheer brilliance, but it got fucked up."

"Cor," Faith warned.

Cordelia sighed and looked like she might as well tell her now.

"The plan was for Angel to become independently wealthy with Buffy's money, and he'd marry me. And he has become independently wealthy with Buffy's money, except he's not married to me. See how it got fucked up?"

"I was a part of this plan?"

"Yes, one of our star players."

Faith's nostrils flared and she asked through her teeth, "For how long?"


Faith shouted, "How long was I one of your `star players'?!"

"Does it really matter now? It's over."

"Fuckin' A, Cordelia, I'm not fuckin' fuckin' around with you!"

She threw her back down into her chair and stalked over to the kitchen counter. A tomato knife was in its holder and she took it out of its sheath.

"Let me ask you somethin'," She walked over and holding the blade up to her face. "Are you pregnant?"

Cordelia's eyes had gone wide at the sight of the blade and she shook her head.

"Were you pregnant?"

"No," She breathed out.

Faith stabbed the table with the knife, straight through Cordelia's hand and she screamed out in pain.

"You're gonna fuckin' tell me this whole fuckin' plan, and you're gonna do it quick or I'm gonna let you bleed to death right here. Got it?!"

Cordelia moaned in agony and tried to pull the knife out, but Faith stopped.

"It hurts!"

"You fucking destroyed my life, Cordelia. Not to mention the lives of everyone you ever fuckin' knew!"

"Faith, take it out!"

"Tell me!"

"W-we…we," She said, trying not to move her hand too much around the knife. "Wh-what do you want to know?" She was panick stricken and wanting to scream out, but oddly she seemed to want to answer Faith's questions, if only to get the pain to stop.

"Who was in on it?!"

"M-meee…oh God, umm, Angel, uhh, Xander…I c-can't think of w-who else right now."


"Because you've g-got a knife—"

"No, I mean why did you do it?!"

"I don't know..."

Faith twisted the knife slightly and Cordelia cried out.

"It was about money! H-he just got cons-sumed by it! W-we didn't think…I w-wanted to…please!"


"F-Faith…p-please…it h-hurts…" Cordelia was openly weeping now. "Pleeeease…I'm s-sorry, it hurts!"

Faith twisted it a little more before holding the knife firmly by the handle and pressing her other hand on Cordy's wrist. With a quick movement, she pulled the knife out.

Cordelia screamed and passed out.

Just then Dennis and Collins, burst into the room.

"What?! Call 911!" Dennis screamed.

Faith was casually wiping off the knife and put it back into its holder.

"She was cuttin' tomatoes," Faith shrugged. "Must've nicked somethin'."

Collins narrowed his eyes at her and moved to block her path.

She jumped onto the kitchen island, slid across the marbled surface of the counter top and made her way out of the back door. She heard the alarms go off and didn't look back as she ran across the manicured lawns of the home and scaled the fence.

She landed on the opposite side with the deftness of a cat and took off running towards the city.



"Buffy, it's for you."

Buffy looked curiously at the phone being handed to her.

"Who is it?"


"Thanks," She said to Angel and watched him leave the room. "Hey, Oz, how are you?"

"Good, how's married life?"

"Kinda the same as un-married life, except now I have to get my license changed." She laughed.


"Are you sure you're okay, Oz?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah. Hey. I'm sorry to call like this, I…"

"What's wrong, Oz?"


"You're scaring me. Is it…" She hesitated before saying the name. "Faith?"

"Yeah, it is."

"What about her?!"

"I just got called a detective for the LAPD, she's looking for her."

"What did she do?"

"Allegedly stabbed Cordelia in the hand with a knife."

"Oh my God! Wait, allegedly?"

"Well, nobody saw her do it, and Cordelia's unconscious."

"Oh no! Is she gonna die?"

"I don't know yet, I just thought I should give you a heads up."

"In case she comes here?" Buffy looked around at the windows.

"No, in case the detective calls," He said.

"Oh, right."

Oz thought he heard disappointment in her voice.

"Oz, why would she stab Cordy? Is this about the baby?"

"I don't know, Buffy, hopefully we'll find out soon."

"I can't believe this!

"I don't think anyone can, but just sit tight, Buffy. We'll find out what's going on."

"Thanks for the heads up, Oz."

"No problem. Hey, thanks for all the nice things you said on your Howard Stern appearance."

"You're welcome," She smiled sadly, remembering all the questions she was asked by the famous radio personality about her relationship with Faith that she had to lie about.

"Talk to you soon," He said.


"Buffy," Angel said, startling her, she hadn't realized he came back into the room. "There's a detective being let into the gates. Is this what the call was about?"

"I'm not sure," She said and got up to put something on over her pajamas.

They went out to the living room together and waited for their butler to open the door.

She showed him her credentials and looked around the room before noticing the two of them.

"Mr. and Mrs. Liam?" The detective asked.

"It's Angelus, my first name is Liam," Angel corrected.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I guess it came off the printer backwards. I'm detective Kate Locksley, LAPD." She handed them her badge, Buffy took it and looked at the shield then gave it to Angel, who scrutinized it and gave it back with a nod.

"Sorry to bother you folks, but I wanted to get out and get a head start on questioning people that might know a Faith Lehane."

"What's she done?" Angel asked.

"Well, we think she's assaulted one Cordelia Chase, but we're not sure of the motive. We were hoping you could help us with that."

"Why us?" Buffy asked. "I mean, I know them both, but I haven't seen Faith in over a month." `Unless you count the nightly dreams of her that I can't seem to stop.'

"Well, you might help with some of the details, but we were really hoping that your husband could come in for questioning."

"Me? Why me? Am I being arrested?"

"No, you're being brought in for questioning."

"Why?! I hardly even knew this Chase woman."

Buffy's eyes narrowed at him.

"Well, we have phone records that say otherwise. Look, Mr. Angelus, we're not arresting you, we just need to ask you some questions, but if you're going to lie to us, then we can place you under arrest."

"For what?"

"Obstruction of justice," Buffy said quietly.

Angel and Kate both looked at her surprised.

She shrugged and explained, "My Uncle Rich was in `Cop Drama' for a few years."

Kate looked at her and smiled, "Richard Wilkes is your Uncle?"

"Yes," Buffy said.

"Wow, his show changed my life! I became a cop because of him."

"How nice," Buffy smiled politely.

"Yeah," Kate said, and then realized she was gushing on the job. "Ah, Mr. Angelus?"

"Can I give you my word I'll be there?"

Kate nodded, "We'll need your wife to sign as well, otherwise we'll have you both arrested."

Angel looked questioningly at Buffy.

"They can do that."

"I can wait if you'd rather…"

"Yes, I'll just go get dressed," Buffy said.

Angel and Kate looked at each other. He was trying to not look nervous and she was trying to see if he was going to crack.



"Who is it?"

"Xand, open the door."


"Yeah, man it's me."

Xander ran to get his pants.

"Holy Shit, Faith! Holy shit!"

After he got his pants on he opened the door with a smile.

"Oh, my God!" He hugged her tight and then let her go. "When did you get in?"

"Earlier," She said with a smile, like the type that normally was seen on Angel, not quite reaching the eyes.

"I'm so happy to see you! Damn," He looked around at his place, it was a shambles. "I, uhhh, if I had known you were coming I'd have…"

"Pulled out?" She smiled and watched him laugh like it was the funniest thing he'd ever heard.

"Oh, shit, that…that was a good one! Hey? Who was in that one?"

Faith narrowed her eyes and her smile disappeared, "Harmony."

Xander looked uneasy, "Oh, Harmony? Really?" He said as he went around cleaning surfaces for them to sit on.

She nodded, watching his every move. She could tell he was tweaked out. He probably hadn't had a fix in at least a day.

"H-how's Switzerland?"

"It's beautiful," She said, looking at some of what was strewn around on the floor, keeping him in her sights.

"I bet. I wish I could come out there with ya. Ya know? All that fishing…"

"Yeah," She spotted a baseball bat next to the bookcase and moved to be near it. "It's been great, ya know? I've been doin' real well."

"Oh, Faith man, th-that's good to hear," He said with sincerity evident in his face. "I thought…" He trailed off.

"That I'd spiral into a drugged out oblivion?" She said looking around at all of the small packets and balls of aluminum foil that had been used to store drugs in and now were strewn all over the floor.

Xander looked at where she was looking, he tried to give her an apologetic smile.

"N-no," He said, nervously.

"Yeah, well, like I said it's been great. Ya know, sittin' around with my dick in my hand. Fucked over for God knows what purpose."

Faith could hear him gulp.

"What'd you do it for, Xand?"


"Fuck me over, what'd you get out of it?"

He looked around nervously and tried to make a break for his room, she got to him as he dove for the bed.

He struggled and reached for something under the pillow.

She slammed the bat she had in her hand on his arm and he cried out in pain. She pulled the pillow away and saw a small revolver and grabbed it.

She held it to the back of his head.

"Start talkin' mother fucker, or your Goddamn brains will make a Picasso all over the fuckin' sheets before you can say `Pablo.'"

"F-Faith," He said, out of breath from the exertion and from the pressure she was putting on him by straddling his back. "I s-swear i-it wasn't my f-fault, man."


"N-no, I fuckin'…I got h-hooked and they kept telling m-me to do shit for `em."

Faith closed her eyes and pushed his head to the mattress with the barrel of the gun.

"Oh, please, don't do it! I'll tell you what you wanna know!"

"You know what it feels like to get fucked, Xander?"


"Fucked, you know what it feels like to get fucked?!" She said menacingly.

"Y-you're gonna fuck me?"

"Eventually, but you just start talkin' like the good little bitch you are," She pulled him up by his hair, and led him over to the leather chair beside his bed, she didn't bother taking off the clothes that were strewn there and he had a difficult time getting comfortable.

She sat on the bed across from him and checked the barrel of the gun. Six bullets.

"Hollow tips, you don't fuckin' play dude."

He shrugged.

"So, you deal or you just use?"

He started to say something and stopped when she clicked the barrel back into place and aimed it right at his face.

"'The Dragon' got your tongue, Xand?"

"I w-was dealing for a little bit," He sniffed and nervously played with his hands. "But I started using too much…"

"Who was fundin' you? We all know you don't have that kinda bank."

"A-Angel," He said, looking away. "Angel was."

"Angel, which really means Buffy `cause we all know he don't have that kinda bank either." Faith looked at him and narrowed her eyes. "She know about this shit?"

He shook his head.

"Sh-she's innocent."

"An innocent victim," Faith said. "Like me."

He nodded.

"Hey, let me tell ya about my visit so far. So, I come out here to do some publicity for the movie," She looked at her watch. "Like about five hours ago?"

"I get this call from Cordy, she wants to see me. I think it's about the baby."

Xander started to move.

She pointed the gun at his crotch.

"You want little Xander to be a memory?"

He shook his head.

"Then you'll stop bein' rude and listen to my story."

"Okay," He said and crossed his legs.

"Now where was I? Oh right, the baby that I'm havin' with Cordy." She stopped and smiled wistfully. "Hey, you think it's gonna look like me?"

Xander looked wide eyed at her.

"'Cause ya know, I really want it to."


"What? You know somethin'?" She feigned surprise.

"Oh God!" He yelled.

"How did you pull off the mornin' after?!"


"After I supposedly fucked Cordy, that magical moment of conception," She sneered.

He sighed, "I was s-leeping on the floor in the room after you p-assed out."

She shot daggers at him, "And?"

"And in the w-we fucked and I came inside of her."

"Where the fuck was I?"

He sighed again and braced himself, "You were in the bed, she was sucking your cock."

"And I came while I was passed out?"

"It took a while," He smiled. "But you're still the man, dude, you came like I should have and more. We had to fake it inside of her with Cetaphil." He shrugged.

She punched his face.

"She raped me and you were a mother fuckin' accessory. Dude!" She screamed at him.

He slumped forward defeated and when he finally picked up his head tears were streaming down his face and blood was pouring out of his nose.

"I-I told them this wouldn't work!"

"Whadda ya mean, Xand?" She said incredulous. "Buffy's married to Mr. Forehead, scumbag, H dealer, I'm back in Switzerland suckin' my own dick, and you're here, rollin' in the…" She looked around keeping the gun trained on him. "Filth."

"I never meant…" He sobbed and used a shirt next to him to stop the flow of blood coming from his nose.

"Fuck you didn't," She said quickly.

"But I didn't, you have to believe me!" His cry was ugly and hysterical.

"What did I tell you a few weeks ago?"

He stopped sobbing and tried to think, he looked at her puzzled, "About the time your step-mom died?"

She back handed him with such force that he fell over the arm of the chair. He pitifully rolled onto his back, and she jumped on top of him, straddling his chest this time. She pointed the gun right between his eyes.

Looking at the barrel made him cross-eyed and she slapped his face to get him to stop. She didn't want to see `goofy happy-go-lucky' Xander staring back at her.

"I told you I didn't like people lyin' to me and that I didn't like to be made a fool of."

"I-I remember."

"That's real good that you remember that, Xander," She said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "I'll have to give you a fuckin' gold star when you regain consciousness."

"Look, Faith. Whatever you want I'll do. I-If you want to fuck me like you said, I'll do it, I'm not a homo-phobe."

"Xander, I wouldn't even fuck you if I was wearin' your dick," She spit in his face and then got up off of him. "You're gonna fuckin' talk to the cops, and give that motherfucker up."

He closed his eyes and started to cry and she got up off of him, looking around the place for his phone. When she found it she dialed it, and held it to his head with the gun in her other hand pointed at the opposite temple.

"911, what's your emergency?"

"I-I've got information on a big drug operation," He looked at Faith and she nodded for him to continue. "I-I need to talk to a cop."

"Are you hurt or injured, Sir?"


"Are you being held against your will?"

His eyes flicked to Faith's, "No. No." He said.

"Okay, just hold the line, I'll switch you to a desk cop, he'll get your information."


"You're welcome, hold please."



"Mrs. Angelus?"

Buffy picked her head up.


"I'm sorry, Ma'am. We're booking your husband."

"Booking him? Why?!" Buffy looked confused.

"We've received some information from an informant."

"What is he being charged with?"

"He's being charged with racketeering, money laundering, attempted bribery, kidnapping, drug dealing, grand larceny…y-you really want all the charges?"

"Why? What's going on? Detective!" She shouted at Kate who was walking out of the questioning room. She walked over to Buffy in the waiting area.

"Mrs. Angelus, I suggest you go home…"

"Tell me what's going on!"

"Like I said, I suggest you go home and call a lawyer if you need to. The judge is going to arraign him, you'll know after that what his bond will be."

"Who's the informant?"

Kate looked at her placatingly, "Mrs. Angelus…"

"Call me Buffy," She said.

"Buffy, you know we can't tell you that."

"Can you tell me who he's accused of bribing?!" Buffy was finding all the charges very hard to believe. It made her head spin.

Kate looked at her for a few moments and then smiled like she was doing her a favor. She snapped her fingers and pointed and someone handed her a folder. She shuffled a few pages and said, "Here it is…a Quentin Travers…you know him?"

Buffy's eye twitched and she just stared straight ahead.

"Can I see, Angel?"

Kate sighed, "I really shouldn't, but since you're Richard Wilkes' niece I'm gonna make an exception. That show really did change my life."

Buffy set her jaw and didn't say anything, Kate showed her to the preliminary holding cell they had Angel in. No one was in this part of the jail.

"Buffy," He said and went up to the bars looking scared. "What's happening? Why are they doing this?"

"I don't know," She said, trying not to choke on her words. "You can't think of anything?"

He shook his head and reached out through the bars to caress her hair, before she had a chance to move away the guard next to her hit his arm.

"Put your hand back inside, the next time you reach out with it you lose it, got it?"

"Officer…" Angel started.

"Officer, can you leave us alone for a moment? I promise he won't do anything." Buffy said.

The uniformed officer looked at Kate who nodded.

"We'll be out here, you've got a few minutes," She said to Buffy.

"Thanks," Buffy smiled at her, then looked at Angel, her smile gone, "Do you want me to call your Uncle Lee for you?" She asked.

Angel looked at her and his eyes went wide. After a moment he said, "Buffy…"

"I sure hope he can bail you out, Angel. I mean, I just don't know where I would come up with bail money."

"Don't even joke like that, baybee. You call Lilah, okay? Okay?" He tried to turn on the charm. "You do that for me, okay? Come on, don't joke like that." He was stalking around, trying to keep his cool.

"No, this time I'm not jumping to quick decisions without all the facts, Angel. You can stay in there until I know the truth."

"Buffy, don't do that…don't…" He said dismissively. "You're just kiddin' around with me. Don't do that, you know how much I don't like that kinda thing."

"No, Angel, I'm going to listen to myself this time, I'm not going to let you talk me into anything…"

"Buffy!" He yelled and practically flew back over to the bars. "Don't fuck around now! You go call Lilah and as soon as the bond is set you have her get me out of this shit hole you hear me?! Don't you fuck with me little girl, you wouldn't like it!"

Buffy was shaking with so much rage that she was sure it would help her rend the bars enough to get a hold of his neck and choke him to death.

Especially when he added, "I'm not some fuckin' half man/half whore that you can just fuck around with and then will go back nicely to wherever it came from once you were done with it. I will fuckin'…" He trailed off when the officer came back into the room.

"Alright, Mrs. Angelus."

"My name is Buffy Summers, do you hear that? Summers." She was looking at Angel as she spoke. "You're lucky I can't get my foot through these bars."

"Okay, Ma'am, let's go, you can't threaten anyone in here or else I gotta book ya, even though I'd be real sympathetic to your situation." The officer said with a half smile.

"You think I don't know what you were doing with your man-whore?! I fuckin' pull the strings, baybee! Me! Liam Fuckin' Angelus!"

The things he was saying about Faith were smacking into her soul harder than any perceived betrayal by Faith ever did.

"Do you have a bathroom I could use?"

"Over here, Ma'am—" The officer sighed and looked up at the ceiling as Buffy got sick all over his shoes. "Or right here in the hallway on my shoes would be okay too."

"I'm sorry," Buffy managed to say as he led her to where the rest room was.

"No, that's okay. At least this time it wasn't some coked up loser in a clown suit."

When she went into the bathroom she looked in the mirror. Turning on the taps she made her hand into a receptacle to splash water on her face, then took some paper out of the dispenser to pat it dry. She looked at herself in the mirror again and then looked away ashamed.

After deciding that she wasn't going to be sick again, for the moment, she rinsed her mouth out with water from the tap.

She would have thought this bout of sickness was about finding out about what kind of person Angel really was, if she hadn't been getting sick for the past two weeks.

She thanked whoever was looking over her that she hadn't told him she was pregnant after they returned from their honeymoon and she took a test.

There was something stopping her from doing that. When an image of Faith from a recent dream popped into her head, she knew exactly what that something was.

Because, in her heart, she knew the child wasn't his.


Who do you need, who do you love
When you come undone

Who do you need, who do you love
When you come undone



Chapter 20 - Coming Together

Buffy put the phone down and looked at her Uncle.

"She's gone. Not a trace. And Mr. Giles says he hasn't heard from her."

"That doesn't mean that she won't turn up there, darling," Quentin said and sat down next to his niece. He gave her a hug from the side.

"This is bad, Uncle Q, she didn't even return any of my calls."

Quentin got up and made Buffy stand up too, he brought her into comforting hug.

"My precious girl, I haven't ever lied to you, have I?"

"Well, except the time that you told me babies came from Saks."

He pulled her out of the hug and looked at her from arm's length.

"And the time that I my teddy bear was dragged off by the neighbor's dog and you told me he joined the Navy."

"Dear," Quentin tried to interrupt.

"And also the time you said that if I went swimming right after I ate I would get stomach cramps."

"Wh…wait, that one was true! We almost lost you," He narrowed his eyes at her and noticed the mischievous glint in hers.

"Darling, don't poke fun…"

"Uncle Q, I'm not poking fun," She hugged him tight and buried her face against his chest. "I'm pointing out how much you love me."

"He only tells you that because you're so ugly," Dawn came in and held out a phone to her. "It's for you. It's that detective again, except why would she have an accent?"

She pulled out of the hug and took the phone quickly. She excused herself and went into the bathroom.

Dawn shrugged at her stunned uncle and said, "Her Activia must have kicked in."

"Oh, Dawn, you're such a little…"

Dawn's eyes went wide, "Sweetie." He smiled at her and opened his arms wide for a hug.

"You love me," She said. "You know it."

"I don't know what I would do without you two girls."

She pulled out of the hug and took her sunglasses off the coffee table.

"Bug the crap out of, Mom," She said and wrapped her sari around her, heading out to join Richard at the pool.

"That's true," He said and rubbed his hands together.



"But, why won't she talk to me, Jay?"

"Buffy, I do not even know why she's not talking to me."

"She left you a message?"

"She tells me she's okay, and not to worry."

"Does she even know that Cordelia said she stabbed herself and that Faith tried to save her from killing herself? The cops aren't looking for her, she's not gonna even have to answer questions."

"Buffy, you are a wonderful woman. I see why she loves you so much."

"How can you say she loves me when she doesn't even want to see me?"

"You know, I have uncle too, he had a dog who was bitten by wolves that my uncle keep in back yard thinking he could train them for…how do you say? Searcus?"

"Circus, yes."

"Yes, Circus, when the dog could walk he ran off and my uncle didn't see him again."

Buffy waited for the conclusion of the story and was about to ask her what happened when she heard Jana talking to someone. Her heart started beating faster thinking it might be Faith.

"Chao, yes baby, I'm talking to Buffy. How was it out there? Of course it's cold, it's a mountain stream. Go, I'm talking."

"Hi Buffy!" Chao yelled enthusiastically into the phone. "Can't wait to see you again, sweety."

"She know, go clean off! You smell like fish," She shoved Chao and then turned her attention back to the phone.

"What do you expect? I was just fishing!" Chao said and then pretended to go sit on the pristine white couch.

"I will beat you in a second," She glared at her girlfriend and watched as she scampered off gleefully to the bathroom before turning her attention back to the phone. "Sorry, Buffy. Where was I?"

"The dog ran off and your uncle didn't see him again."

"Oh yes, he didn't see him again for almost a year, he came back stronger than ever."

Buffy was trying to process the information Jana was trying to give her.

"You're saying she needs time and she'll eventually come back to me?"

"I don't know about coming back, but at least talking maybe?"

"Talking would be nice, but Jana…"

"Call me, Jay."

"Jay, I love her so much."

Jana's heart was clenching for Buffy, she could hear how much she loved Faith, and she knew firsthand what that felt like.

"I know, Liebchen. You hold onto that, she will come around."

"I hope so, thanks for calling me back."

"You know I almost messed things up, I forgot the name of the lady you told me to say I was."

"No, really?"

"Yes, I tell your sister that I am `Detective from LAPD'."

Buffy had to laugh, Dawn probably saw right through that.

"Thanks again, Jay."

"Take care of yourself, Buffy.'

"I will, you too."

"Maybe Chao and I come over soon to do another movie with you."

"Oh, well, I'm not going to be doing anymore movies anytime soon. If ever."

"No! Really? You are awesome, don't quit!"

Buffy sighed, "I've been at the top of this business for a while I think it's time I let some of you guys take over for a while."

"Well, don't stay out too long. You are wonderful."

Buffy blushed, "Thanks, you're pretty wonderful yourself."

"Thank you, bye."


Jana hung up the phone and went outside on the deck, she looked off in the distance and waved out to someone making their way back up to the house.

"Oh my god, that is such a long walk to the river!"

"Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm gonna just sit for a minute."

Jana went down and held the chair out for Harmony.

"I just got off the phone with Buffy Summers."

"Oh really?" Harmony said and narrowed her eyes.

"Harmony, don't be like that, she wasn't involved in what happened."

"What did I say?"

"You didn't say anything it was a look."

"I don't hate her, Jay. I just…I'm stupidly holding a grudge against her for something her stupid friend did."

"Did you get the letter I put on your bed?"

"Yes," She said and sat back in her chair, rubbing her growing belly. "It was from him if you must know."

"And are you going to write back to him?"

Harmony let out a long slow sigh, "Why should I let him back into my life when he caused so much pain? Just because he's the father of my child?"

"Heroin is a power none of us would be able to hold back."

Harmony rolled her head towards Jana and pulled down her sunglasses, "No one told him to help Cordelia and Angel try to scam innocent people out of money."

Jana shrugged her shoulders, "I can't argue with that."

"When I told Angel I didn't want Xander hanging out with him anymore that night at Glory's party…he defended him. I knew then that I couldn't stay and have this baby with him like that. I've lost my brother and two of my friends to that shit, Jay."

Jana stood up and went over to Harmony, "I know, baby," She leaned down and hugged her. "You were so brave to come and give your little one a better start."

"Thanks to Faith, and you guys."

Jana smiled.

"Speaking of Faith, has she talked to Buffy at all?"

Jana shook her head.

"Oh God, she makes me so mad! She should just suck it up and say you know what? You didn't listen to me when I told you I didn't get Cordy pregnant, but I'm the bigger person and let's talk this out."

"You know how Faith is," Jana shrugged. "We have a term for her in Czech Republic."

Jana said what it was in her native language.

Harmony raised her eyebrows and looked at her expectantly, "English please?"

"It gets lost in the translation, but it means, the harder the head, the better the…"

"Sex!" Chao-Ahn came onto the deck and slapped Jana on the ass. "Yeah girl!"

"You are worse than Faith," Jana said as she chased after Chao around the deck. "At least she has a hard head! Yours is made of oatmeal."

They play fought on the deck while Harmony looked on and smiled.





"Giles, you called me, do you really not know how a cell phone works?"

"Someone else could be picking it up."

Faith leaned back in the sleeping bag and looked up at the ceiling of her tent.

"Who, Giles? The dog?"

He narrowed his eyes even though she couldn't see him.

"Should I hang up now or do you want to know who I just spoke to?"

"I'm sorry, who did you speak to, Buffy again?"

"No, Ms. Know-It-All. I happened to speak to Anya."

Faith sat up in the tent.

"What's up?"

"She says Xander is all finished with his program, he'll be doing a year in jail for possession and conspiracy with his time in rehab counted as time served."

"He's lucky I didn't end his life that bastard."

"Yes, I'm sure he'll be happy to hear your sentiments."

"Giles don't fuck with me, I spent all day yesterday digging tourists out of snow."

"I can tell by your colorful language that you are in no mood, so I'll be brief with the rest."

"Shoot," She said and lay back down.

"Cordelia's trial has been postponed yet again, Anya is certain her lawyers are going to try to throw every injunction they have into this for it not see the inside of a courtroom for some time."

"Figures, Queen Bitch would do something like that, doesn't surprise me. Anything else?"

"Angel is going to be an old man before he ever sees the outside of a jail cell."


"Must you?"

"Yes, I fuckin' must," Faith said with glee as she rubbed her dog who had come over to get in on the excitement. "Who's a good girl? Who is? Yes you are! Yes you are!"

"Is that Vi?"

Faith had to laugh, "No, Giles it's the Queen of England. She came up here for some tea and crumpets."

"Faith, I really don't know why I bother sometimes…"

"'Cause you love me."


There was something about his tone that caused the smile to fade from her face. She stayed still as Violet licked her face before asking, "What is it Giles?"

"I don't know how you can do this to an innocent person."

"She didn't believe in me Giles, how else do you want me to say it?"

"Yes, I know, there's that but…"

"But nothin', I don't give many people chances in my life, how do I know she'd ever stick it out if things got rough, which they did?"

"You have to admit…"

Faith affected a British accent and lowered her voice to almost Giles' register, "That the circumstances were out of the ordinary?"

"Yes as a matter of fact."

"Giles, I have tits and a huge dick, the circumstances will always be out of the ordinary. Hey, thanks for the news, though. I really appreciate it."

"I wasn't done."

"Well, my battery is lower than I'd like it to be considerin' I'm not chargin' it until tomorrow."

"What happened to the extra ones I bought you last month?"

"Not helpin' my battery sitch, Giles."

"Well, I didn't want to tell you in this manner, but you leave me no choice…"


"Harmony had a boy."

"No way! What the fuck Giles? That was opening conversation worthy, why did you wait until the end?!"

"I'm in my office and someone just handed me a slip of paper."

"Oh, sorry, but fuckin' A, G! Wooohoooooooooo!"

Giles held the phone away from his head as Faith's howl's continued and Vi joined in.

`Someone is going to think a pack of rabid wolves are in that tent,' He thought.

"Oh, that is such good news!" Faith said into the phone. "What did he weigh? How long is he?! What did she name it?!"

"He weighed seven pounds thirteen and he was…fifty five point eighty eight centimeters?"

Faith did a quick calculation in her head, "About twenty two inches, damn he's long, good weight too."

"I don't understand why they would write half in metric half in…"

"Giles, name?"

"Oh yes, sorry, Marcus Alexander."

Faith had to smile despite her current hatred for Xander, "She did right by her man, huh?"

"She does still maintain a modicum of affection for him," Giles said.

"I love how you speak English, yet I have no idea what you're saying."

"Don't be stupid."

"You say that like it's easy."

"Will you ever stop trying to get my goat?"




"Come home," Giles said, with a soothing tone.

She closed her eyes and thought of what home meant to her and opened them back up when Buffy showed up in her thoughts.

"I'm needed here."

"I know, and you're doing a wonderful job, just remember, you have people here that love you and wish to see you more than once a month."

"I know."

"One more thing, and I would have told you this sooner but you kept veering me totally off course."


"Anya says that Buffy is with child."

Faith stared at an imaginary point in the tent, and didn't move or say anything for several moments.

"Faith?" Giles asked after a while.

"How long?"

"I'm not certain, but it could be about six months."

"I came here seven months ago, so…yeah figures."

"I said I'm not certain."

"It's okay, G. Probably a conjugal visit with her husband."

"Oh, I know what I forgot to relay, they're no longer married. The marriage was actually annulled since the court found that he married her under false pretenses and with intent to defraud her family of their fortune." He took a deep breath. "Well, there you have it.  That's all I have for you at the moment."

"Thanks, Giles. Really."

"You're welcome, and Faith?"


"I mean what I said, you should come home."

"I'll talk to you later, G."

"Be careful, and give Vi a scratch on her belly for me."

"I will, be good to you."

"Bye," He said and waited for her to hang up on her end. "Dear girl."

Faith rolled over and started sobbing into her small pillow.

`Fuck, I'm such a girl…' She thought as Vi started to whimper and paw at her master. `She's moved the fuck on. Fuck."



Faith was up in the mountains for another two weeks, she was just hunkered down for another restless night of sleep when her personal phone rang.

`Can I disappear for a while without people buggin' me? Or what?'

She looked at the display and sighed.

"Or what?"

"Don't `or what' me, Missy. You have spent enough time on that goddamned hill, get your ass down from it, you have responsibilities!"

"Like what?"

"Firstly, I haven't been paid in over a week."

"An, you're on a monthly stipend."

"I didn't say from you, I'm just telling you what's going on in my life," She smiled at her joke.


"Faith, really, enough is enough already."

"What's that supposed to mean? Why can't I tune in and drop out."

"Because this isn't the LSD generation and you're not Dr. Timothy Leary."


"Fai…" Anya said in a mocking tone. "Everyone coddles you, yeah okay fine you were wronged. You don't think millions of other women or women with penises haven't been wronged?! I mean, think of China alone for God's sake, they're practicing selective gender child birth! Weeding out the girls! I started this practice after vowing that I would never let what my father did to my mother happen to another woman ever again. And you know what?"


"I've won every single case and negotiation that I've represented except one, and I chalk that up to being star struck."

"Anya, you were arguing against the lawyer for Greg Evigan."

"He was in BJ and the Bear!"

"Oh Christ, not the monkey story again…"

"You know what? You don't deserve to hear that story."

"Anya, remember earlier in the conversation when you weren't coddlin' me? Can we go back to that?"

"Oh, right, thank you."

Faith rolled her eyes, "You're welcome."

"What I was trying to get at is that you can't just run away from your problems. You were hurt, in the worst way possible, but if you keep yourself isolated they've won. They've taken a wonderful person out of society all because they were greedy."

"I'm doin' good work here."

"I know, Giles said it's great work, and I really applaud you, but please, get off the fucking mountain!"

"I'll think about it."

"Okay, well, let me give you a couple points to chew on while you're thinking…I've just been given an envelope with an order demanding to know you're whereabouts for child support payment purposes."

"Oh, fuck what the fuck?!"

"It's a standard filing practice, even before the baby's born, if the mother wants to make the `father' in this case, you're maintaining that it's allegedly you, aware that…"



"No, who filed this shit?"

"Joyce Summers."


"Why not? You haven't been answering any of Buffy's letters, voicemails or texts, she thinks you're going to be a deadbeat, she comes after Anya, but if you tell me that little dumpling baking inside of Buffy isn't yours, they're going down like you did on that Chinese girl in your last movie."


"Oh my God, eardrum!"

"What the fuck are you saying? Are you telling me that Buffy says I'm the father of this child?"

Anya went silent and then looked at the display for the phone, and then put it to her ear again.

"I'm so sorry, Faith. I thought…I thought Giles told you!"

Faith's mind was racing a mile-a-minute and her heart was keeping the same pace.

"No, no, he told me she was pregnant…"

"Well, then I've just told you the best kind of news in the worst way possible. The legal way."

All of the questions that were tumbling around in Faith's head made it difficult for her to pick one.

She finally spoke after a few long moments, "I…Is she sure?"

"She seems to think so."

"She told me she was on the pill."

"Well, I talked to her lawyer and she said that during the bulk of the time you two were together she was on an anti-biotic for some dental work she was having done. Anti-biotics…"

"Diminish the effects of birth-control."

"She also stated that during her time on the Anti-biotics, she had sex with only you."

"I remember her takin' `em."

"And you didn't think anything of it?"

"I thought they were vitamins."

"Well, does it matter now?"


"I thought you should also know that she and her sister have been in Switzerland for over a week."

Faith's eyes got wide.

"I'm sure Giles failed to mention that little tidbit."

"I haven't spoken to him in two weeks."

"You know how easy it is to get information out of him."

Faith thought for a moment, "Holy fuck."

"She's probably at Jana's now."

"Oh Jesus, Jesus."

"Faith? Pray later. Grow the fuck up now, and use those balls that are so prominently taking up real-estate in your underwear."

Faith rolled her eyes, "Good one, An."

"It is, isn't it? I've been practicing that one, I'm gonna use it on my next victim, I mean legal opponent."

"If I'm leavin' this mountain today, I better get packed now."


"I'll talk to you later."

"Be careful, and tell that bitch of yours Anya said hi."

"Hey bitch!" Faith yelled at the tent flap and Vi stuck her head in. "Anya say's `hi'."

"Did she smile?"

"She eye rolled, I swear," Faith laughed.

"Shut up."

"I ain't lyin'."

"You better hurry, Faith. You're running out of time."


"She's not gonna wait forever."

After ten hours of traversing the rugged, snow covered landscape, Faith finally reached Jana's house.

"Oh my God, it's the abominable snowman!" Harmony cried from the window.

"You think that's…"

Dawn looked out of the window.

"It's the right height."

Buffy got up from the couch, "Maybe we shouldn't have come here like this."

"Buffy…" Jana said.

"No, I was wrong to…"

"Buffy, you're just nervous."

"But she might hate me!"

"She doesn't hate you…"

"Dawn get your coat, we're leaving."

Dawn's eyes narrowed at her sister.

"Are you smoking crack?"

"I can't…" Buffy started to wring her hands and pace. "I shouldn't have…"

"Buffy, just sit down!"

Jana's heart went out to Buffy, "Buffy, why don't you and Dawn go upstairs, I'll talk to Faith before you two have meeting."

Buffy looked at Dawn who gave her a shrug back.

"Couldn't hurt."

"Besides, she's going to be exhausted from the last few weeks, she'll probably just go down to sleep."

"After eating what's not tied down," Harmony said.

"She does eat a lot," Chao-Ahn agreed.

"Okay, I hear her on steps, go!"

Buffy and Dawn quickly made their way upstairs.

Faith could be heard banging her shoes on the concrete steps of the porch. Then the doorbell rang.

Jana went to open it after making sure everything was in place.

"What happened to your key?"

"Must have put it in the bag with the extra cell phone batteries," She smiled and wrapped Jana up into a hug. "So where is she?"


"Buffy," Faith said.

"What makes you think she's here?"

"My heart is doing that fucked up thing it does when I smell her perfume."

"Oh gross, you smell her?" Harmony asked.

"I smell you too."

"That's disgusting." Chao-Ahn agreed with Harmony.

"She's upstairs, resting. She's had some excitement today."

"She okay?"

"She's fine, she just knew you'd be here soon."

Faith nodded, "Well, sleep sounds like a good idea," She stretched. "Is my bed still all made?"

"Yes," Jana said.

"Good, night everyone."

They all hugged Faith and said how nice it was to have her back, and told her to have a good night's sleep.

When she was gone they looked around at each other curiously.

"That was fucking odd," Harmony said what everyone else was thinking.

Chao-Ahn was nodding her head, "So weird, did you see how calm she was?"

"Tomorrow is going to be interesting day," Jana said. "We should all get rest too, make sure we have enough energy to withstand the storm."



No matter how many times she tried, she couldn't get comfortable, finally, a decidedly disheveled Dawn sat up straight in the bed and told her she was going to go to sleep on the couch.

"No, Dawnie, I'm just feeling…"


Buffy was going to protest, but she thought it was best not to lie.

"Oh my God, yes! Why?"

"For one, your true love is downstairs, probably ripped in all the good ways from her time climbing mountains, and for two, I think I read somewhere that at this stage of your pregnancy you're gonna be hot and bothered almost constantly."

Buffy let out a sigh, "Great."

"It's really okay if I just go sleep on the couch."

"Did you see how white that couch was? You shouldn't mess it up."

"I'm not a hobo, ya know," Dawn laughed. "Hey that rhymed."

Buffy got up out of the bed and reached for her peignoir and put it on.

"Woah, someone's looking to get laid tonight."

"What?" Buffy looked down at her ensemble.

"I can see right through that thing and you're not even standing in the light."

"That's because you're a pervert," Buffy said as she tied the belt. "And a childish one at that."

"Takes one to know one," Dawn said childishly and then flopped back down into the bed. "Thinks I'm a child," She scoffed.

She was asleep within minutes.



Faith heard movement on the floor above, Vi heard it too because she lifted her head.

"You hear that girl?"

Vi started to get up and Faith put her hand on her back, "No, you stay here, I got this one."

She got up out of the bed and made her way upstairs.

Of all the things she had faced in her life, they seemed to all be rehearsals for this moment and she knew she had better play this right.

When she reached the first floor she noticed the door was ajar and someone was standing in front of it.

"Buffy," She whispered.

Buffy didn't turn around.

"I couldn't sleep."

"Me neither."

Faith tenuously walked up to where she was standing. She looked like an angel, framed by the light from the moon glinting off of the snow.

"I have so much to say to you, Faith."

Faith didn't say anything, she just walked up behind Buffy and hugged her back into her.

Buffy's heart swelled, and she closed her eyes.

"I know," Faith whispered into her ear. "But right now why don't you close the door, it's fuckin' freezin'."

"I was hot."

Faith shut the door and turned Buffy around to her.

"Still are," She said with a smirk.


Faith cut off what Buffy was about to say with a searing, and much needed kiss.

When it got too hot for them, they broke momentarily.

"B, I know we should really talk…"

"Faith, I've…I wanted…I don't know…"

Faith picked up Buffy and brought her downstairs without another word.

A few moments later, Vi made her way up to the first floor, giving an annoyed backwards glance at the staircase leading to the basement.



"Are you sure, Buffy?"

"I can't fucking stand how long I've been without you."

"We just did it like three times!"

Buffy lifted herself onto Faith's erect cock for the fourth time and slid down.

Faith took her hands and helped her rock back and forth on her throbbing cock.

"Oh my…fuck it Faith, fuck me. I love you so much," Buffy said as she bounced up and down.

Faith powered her hips into Buffy, fucking her pussy, feeling it grasp at her dick.

They knew they had a lot to talk about in the coming days. But right now, for them, it was about coming together.

And as if on cue, Faith's cock spurt hot white come into Buffy's vagina, and Buffy fell forward onto her.

Crying out her love.



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