CHAPTER NINE

 "I must say, Willow, it was a truly splendid idea."

Willow was all smiles.

"Gee Giles, you don't have to sound so surprised. I do come up with some good ones sometimes."

"Yes, several in fact, but the unorthodox nature of this one…"

Marion interrupted him:

"Explains why you're a mogul."

"Yep, mogul-dom definitely requires outside the box thinking."

Marion laughed:

"Especially when it comes to this group. The more unorthodox, the more normal it is."

"Includin' yourself there, Tarzan?"

"Of course I am, Faith."

"Good, 'cause your ass fit from the second you hit the scene."

Buffy couldn't agree fast enough:

"I'll say. Talk about somebody just going for it. We could barely figure out what we were looking at."

"G-Man sure as shit couldn't. He was…"'

"As I recall it, I was extremely suave and…"

Buffy's snort got everyone's attention.

"Please Giles, the three of us saw you."

Marion's hand patted his thigh.

"I remember you as very suave, Rupert."

"Thank you, dear. Buffy, I believe the pertinent expression to be: 'in your face'."

Faith couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"Christ yeah, that's the expression for sure…'bout thirty years ago."

"Oh, it's somewhat dated then?"

Buffy leaned back into Faith, her face filled with amused affection for her Watcher.

"Try carbon-dated, Giles."

"I see. Marion, surely you should be offering me some assistance?"

"Yes I should, but even I can only do so much, Mr. Fuddy-Duddy."

"Ha bloody ha. My out datedness aside, as I remember it, you were quite smitten with me."

"I was…and I still am."

She gently took his glasses off and kissed him passionately. When it ended, she handed them back to him, as well as the handkerchief from his pocket.

"Here, you know you want to."

"I really shouldn't put up with you."

She smiled and snuggled into him.

"You have to, you're smitten with me too."

"Quite right."

She turned back to the group:

"You've got to admit it was a rip-roaring introduction."

"Still sorry I missed it. Bloody Angel had me running around L.A. 'stead of getting an eyeful of the legendary 'Kamikaze' in action."

"You've seen me in action plenty of times by now, Spike, and I'm hardly legendary or a kamikaze."

"Sorry, shoe fits. Gotta slip it on."

Marion laughed:

"Well, that night I slipped it on so fast, it made my head spin. One second I was minding my own business, the next I was entangled with two Slayers and their sexy as hell Watcher."

Giles had his glasses back on, and his arm wrapped Marion as he remembered.

"Frankly, I was delighted when you showed up. Faith was behaving most abysmally and…"

"I was what?"

Buffy tried not to laugh:

"He means you were being a bitch."

"Know what it means, B, just don't agree. 'Sides G-Man, you interrupted us right when I was gonna…"

"She means we were otherwise engaged."

"No, I mean we were busy fuc…Ow!"

Giles spoke quickly before she could try to continue:

"I understand you girls were…busy, but really Faith, what would you have had me do? I received the information and we had to act quickly if we were to…"

"Coulda waited an hour, but no, not you. You gotta get it rollin' no matter what."

"I find it patently absurd that you're still irritated by something that took place years ago."

"Not irritated about the irritating part, I'm pissed 'cause you said I was actin' all shitty…B, was I actin' shitty?"

"Uh…"

Buffy was fascinated with something invisible on her shirtsleeve, and when Faith saw she wasn't going to respond, she turned to Marion.

"Tarzan, you were there. What about it?"

"I'm not really sure. I didn't know you back then, so I just thought you were a scary, lovable nutcase. That's an opinion I still hold, by the way. But 'shitty"'? I don't know. You were a little…"

Giles jumped in:

"Angry, hostile, and quite the brat, I dare say. Besides Faith, your worst behavior happened before Marion even made her appearance. It was only after releasing some, shall we say: 'tension', that you became somewhat easier to deal with."

Faith clearly disagreed.

"Not how it went down at all. B?"

"Huh?"

"You gonna ram that fence up your ass all night? What's your take?"

"Well…um…"

"So you're agreein' with G-Man?"

"You were kind of…"

Faith shoved her.

"Traitor. Fine, got my girl on your side, so I say tell it and see how it plays for everybody else."

Giles' smile was smug.

"If you insist."

"Fuck yeah, I do. Gettin' railroaded here."

"All right then…My recollection is that Buffy, you, and I were standing in an alleyway trying to locate our prey. You were somewhat less than thrilled to be there. I'd just expressed my desire that Willow were with us in order that she might perform a locator spell, and you being most out of sorts, chose to take great offense at that rather innocuous statement…"

"Christ Giles, we all wish Red was here, alright?"

"Faith…"

"But she's not, so maybe suck it up and deal with us lousy Slayers."

"…I was not impugning your ability to get the job done, I was simply stating that this excursion would be proceeding a great deal more smoothly if we could avail ourselves of Willow's many useful talents."

Faith spun to look at him.

"Impugn B all ya wanna, just leave me out of it!"

"Hey, I want no impugnment either. Let me officially state for the record that Buffy authorizes no impugniness of any kind."

"Oh for God's sake, I am not…"

He stopped himself.

"May we please just focus on what we came here to do?"

"Fine, but the asshole better show soon. Not hangin' around all goddamn…"

"F, stop with the mega grouchies."

"Sorry, Blondie, but gettin' my ass hauled outta bed to go hunting all over the fuckin' town for some freak of a demon, kinda sets me right the fuck off."

Giles attempted to defuse the situation before it escalated:

"We are all tired, but surely we can agree…"

"I'm here, yeah? Standin' right in this fucking alley just like you. What the hell else ya want from me?"

Buffy stepped closer to her.

"Gee, how about a little less of the grumpy?"

"Or how 'bout I don't say a fuckin' word then?"

"How 'bout that sounds good to me?"

"Yeah? Well listen up, B, not gonna…"

"Enough! Clearly this is not the time for a ridiculous squabble!"

Faith wasn't remotely ready to back down, even if Giles was yelling.

"Well since 'squabble's' nothin' but ridiculous, what the fuck else…"

They all heard it a split second before they saw it.

The demon erupted out of the dumpster, obviously enraged. It straightened to its full height, easily standing seven foot tall. An enormous arm flung carelessly against the wall next to the dumpster, and several pieces of brick and mortar crumbled to the ground.

"So, guessin' it's not just me who gets pissed when they're interrupted."

At the sound of her voice, the demon turned its full attention to Faith. It stepped out of the dumpster and lumbered over to her, but she stood her ground and met it with a powerful punch. The blow didn't even seem to register, and it lifted her high into the air and hurled her into the alley's light pole. The light flickered from the strength of the impact, and Faith groaned as she rolled over slowly onto her back.

Buffy didn't wait to get tagged in. She delivered a series of rapid hits, and although the demon took several steps back, it was clearly not seriously injured. Still it looked wary, its eyes never leaving the Slayer.

Faith used the break in the action to struggle to her feet and make her way to Buffy's side.

"You okay?"

"Think I just had sex with that pole, but yeah. Any ideas, B?"

For the moment, the only sounds were the soft murmuring of Giles reciting the incantation and the accompanying low growl emanating from the demon as it sized them up.

"Well, after watching it use you as a Frisbee, I'm thinking we should just try to contain it while we stay as far away from it as possible. Giles only needs a few more minutes."

"Works for me.  Kinda like my spine in one piece."

Just then, a door swung open into the alley.

"…tell me it's time to go! I wasn't the one who…What the hell?"

A tall, athletic woman was now standing next to the demon. To her credit, her first impulse was to head back in through the door she'd just exited. Unfortunately it had swung shut, locking automatically.

"Shit!"

She fumbled through her purse and emerged with a cross that she held up in front of the demon. Most times in Sunnydale that would have been a good idea, but not this time. This time all it did was piss off a giant demon and shoot the Slayers' plan down before they had any chance to try it out.

The demon swatted the cross from her hand, then swung its massive arm directly at her head. She was seconds from being dead, but the Slayers were already moving as one.

Faith somersaulted low while Buffy inserted herself in between the demon's swinging arm and the woman. That was the good news. The bad news was that Buffy took the full force of the blow, and as "blows of full force" went, it was pretty damn forceful.

She went sailing through the air, stopping only when she crashed into a brick wall. It seemed as if the building itself shook when she hit, and several bricks jarred loose and rained down onto the ground. Buffy was still conscious, but she was obviously dazed and in considerable pain.

Faith had attacked the demon's legs, hoping to bring it down while it was distracted. That plan hadn't gone very well, and she was now lying prone as the demon attempted to smash its foot down into her face. She was using every ounce of her strength to prevent that from happening, but she was losing the battle.

Buffy struggled to her feet, but she was actually swaying as she stood in place. She knew Faith was in trouble, but her head was spinning so much, she was certain there must be little cartoon birdies flying in circles around it. She couldn't seem to walk in the direction she wanted to go…and that was when the craziest thing happened.

The woman had climbed onto the dumpster, and was now up on the fire escape, poised to make her escape. At least that's what they all thought she was doing. Instead she let out a Tarzan-like scream…and leapt right onto the demon's back.

She had a death grip around its neck, and she threw the demon off balance just enough to allow Faith to roll clear, right before an extremely large foot smashed a hole in the pavement. It still managed to kick out and the glancing blow sent Faith flying into a stack of crates. The demon then forgot all about her as it turned its full attention to the annoying gnat clinging to its back.

The demon began roaring, bending this way and that as it tried to shake her loose. When that didn't work, it angled towards the wall with the obvious intention of crushing the crazy mystery woman into an unrecognizable pulp. Apparently Buffy wasn't all that wild about the idea, because she waded right into the demon's arms.

She got in several good shots to the demon's face and torso, and its blood sprayed everywhere as she connected.

"Let go…Now!"

The woman did exactly what Buffy told her to do.

She let go and crawled backwards to safety, and without the distraction on its back, the demon chose to deal with Buffy. It wrapped her up in a tight bear hug, and the sound of her ribs popping and snapping was plain to hear, as was her agonized yell. Faith did her best to ignore the sound as she took a running start.

She swung herself around head high on the lamppost, building momentum as she completed her second circuit. She silently yelled at Buffy to duck, and Buffy instantly tucked her head down into the demon's torso. Faith's boots hit as one, striking right where its neck met its chest, and the demon was dead before it hit the ground.

Buffy landed hard and she stayed down.

"B, you okay?"

 "…Why is it…always…my ribs?"

Giles was helping the mystery woman to her feet and when he was sure she was okay, he led her back over to the Slayers.

Buffy was standing now, although she couldn't quite manage the "straight up" position.

"Are you all right?"

"Peachy, Giles…Just a couple…broken…ribs."

"Yes, a most unpleasant sound to be sure."

"Doesn't…feel too…good…either."

Faith was looking the newcomer up and down.

"Jesus Christ, lady! Sure got a pair on you."

"Not compared to you two girls."

"Could argue that."

"I don't think I'll be arguing with either of you. I've had my ass kicked more than enough tonight."

She was standing in the streetlight's glow and they all got their first good look at her.

She was tall, almost as tall as Giles, and she looked to be in really good shape. Her hair was a soft, wavy brown, and it was cut to just above her shoulders. Her eyes appeared to be brown as well, but it was hard to tell for sure in the weak light. She was in no way good-looking, but there was something about her that was extremely attractive.

Giles turned to face her:

"I must say, that was incredibly brave of you."

"Or incredibly stupid, but I've had plenty of those moments in my life, so this one fits in quite nicely."

"Ya saved my head from gettin' smashed into powder, so let's hear it for 'stupid moments'."

She bent down to pick up her purse.

"I'm guessing that wasn't a vampire then?"

Giles was happy to explain:

"No, that was a Sprandish demon. Extraordinarily rare, although obviously not quite rare enough."

"Well, I'm hoping their rareness means the odds are in my favor I'll never have to see another one."

"I believe that to be a fair certainty."

Buffy would have screamed at him if her ribs weren't killing her.

"Giles…don't…jinx us."

"What? Oh yes, perhaps that was a bit imprudent."

The crazy woman laughed:

"Is that all it takes? Then I guess I should hurry and introduce myself before the next attack. I'm Marion Conway, and I'd like to thank you girls for saving my life."

"Not too fuckin' sure that's how it went down."

"I'm Buffy…this is Faith…and the man…holding onto…your arm…is Giles."

He looked down to find that yes, he was in fact still holding onto her arm. He let go quickly, obviously flustered.

"I beg your pardon, it wasn't my intention to manhandle you. I'm Rupert Giles, and I'm delighted to make your acquaintance."

"I hope that remains true once you get to know me."

"What? Oh yes…I'm sure it shall."

She looked him up and down, making him a little uncomfortable.

"So what brings you three to this dark alley at two in the morning?"

"Could ask ya the same."

Marion smiled warmly at Faith, seeming to see right through her belligerence.

"Yes you could, dear. Ask away."

Faith looked at her with an angry scowl, but Buffy saw the faintest flash of a dimple. Giles spoke up before anyone else could:

"Ms. Conway, if you could please explain how you came to be here?"

"Okay, but only because you asked so sweetly. I was happily drowning my sorrows, and then I found myself accused of being a sloppy drunk and asked to leave. I thought they were full of it, but considering I exited into a back alley and then jumped onto a monster's back, I think maybe I owe the bartender an apology."

"Not a good idea to wander around alleys after dark in Sunny D."

She smiled again as her eyes met Faith's:

"And yet you two girls and this stunningly handsome man were doing just that."

"So we jump off a bridge, you gonna?"

She laughed and shook her head.

"You're very funny, in a surly sort of way, but could we stop this battle of wits? After what I've been through tonight, I'm feeling completely unarmed. Perhaps instead, one of you could explain what you're all doing here?"

"I'm afraid it's rather complicated, Ms. Conway."

"Marion…and there's nothing I like better than a complicated boy."

Faith snickered:

"Musta took one in the head. G-Man's pretty far from bein' a 'boy'.

"But then I'm pretty far from being a girl. Besides, men are so much sexier with a little mileage on them."

Giles turned so red, he was practically glowing in the dark. Buffy would have been laughing if her ribs weren't still killing her, but they were, so unfortunately she had to speak up.

"As much as…I'm enjoying…the sight of…Giles dying from…embarrassment…I really need…"

Giles looked stricken that he had forgotten his Slayer's discomfort.

"Buffy, I'm so sorry! We need to get you home and give those ribs some much needed medical attention."

Marion was digging her keys out from the bottom of her purse, going by feel in the dim lighting.

"Could I follow you in my car? I'm still desperately in need of an explanation."

"Thought you were knockin'em back all night?"

"I was, Faith. That's why I'm hoping one of you could drive me."

Giles spoke up without delay:

"That should pose no problem whatsoever."

"Hmm…sexy and efficient, not to mention gallant. Where have you been?"

"Yeah…Giles…where have…you been?"

He didn't so much as spare a glance in Buffy's direction.

"Yes, well, putting aside my sexy efficiency for the moment…"

"I don't think sexiness should ever be 'put aside', especially not yours."

Faith laughed and slapped Giles on the back:

"She's got a point, G-man, plus not like ya got'em comin' outta the wood…"

"Faith…could I…see you…over here?"

"Huh? What fo…Oh yeah, sure."

The Slayers moved off a discreet distance, and Giles began cleaning his glasses rather vigorously.

Marion smiled at him.

"I'm afraid I've embarrassed you."

"What? No, of course not…Well, yes…perhaps just a tad."

"I'm sorry. I'm always forward, but not to this extent. My brush with death, coupled with the vast quantities of alcohol I've imbibed, has me acting a little on the slutty side."

He placed his glasses back where they belonged.

"Not at all. It's more than understandable in light of the events that have transpired here."

"Would you stick with that theory if I throw you down on the ground and have my way with you like I want to?"

He reached for his glasses again, but managed to stop himself at the last second.

"Ms. Conway…"

"It's Marion. Besides, since I just threatened to ravish you, it seems only right we be on a first name basis."

"I'm afraid I don't quite know how to respond."

She laughed quietly:

"But that's the thing…I think you do know, you've just forgotten."

He cleared his throat to respond, but nothing came out.

"Okay, I'll let you off the hook for now. Your daughters are incredibly brave as well as stunningly beautiful. Of course they're also violent and more than a little scary too."

"Yes they are, but…"

"And now they're also kissing each other."

"An event that occurs quite regularly as they're a couple. Unfortunately, neither one is my daughter, though I wish it were otherwise. I do however, love them as if they were my actual offspring, and they are both wonderful young women. I couldn't be prouder of them."

"Okay, so I say again…Your daughters are beautiful."

He began laughing:

"Yes they are, thank you."

"Goddamn, you are unbelievably handsome."

"I fear your eyes are being deceived by the poor lighting and your rather intoxicated..."
 
"For fuck's sake Giles, just take a compliment…Ow!"

"She's sorry…We can't hear…a thing."

Marion laughed and turned to the Slayers:

"Thank you for the effort girls, but there's just no privacy in back alleys anymore."

"Shit, ain't that the truth."

Buffy instantly looked at Faith.

"Excuse me…when were…you in a…back alley…needing…privacy?"

"Easy B, just a figure of speech."

Giles tried to head off the brewing argument:

"Shall we all proceed to the house then?"

It took her a few moments, but Buffy finally stopped staring at Faith.

"Taping of ribs…and lying in bed…sounds good."

Faith looked at the carcass on the ground and then to Giles.

"G-Man?"

"My research indicates it should decompose rather rapidly, but could you please place it inside the dumpster as a precaution?"

"Yeah, okay. Just wish I had some gloves."

Buffy walked over to look down at the slightly oozing demon.

"Broken ribs…are worth it…if I…don't have…to touch…that."

"Fuck, don't we got anything?"

Marion was looking through her purse.

"I've got two hankies!"

"And I've my handkerchief as well."

"Way better than nothin'."

She grabbed them and got ready to do her job. Everyone else stepped well back, and as they did, Marion leaned against Giles. Buffy saw the smile that fleetingly crossed his face, and evidently Marion saw it too because she linked her arm through his.

They stood there watching silently, Faith's swearing and grunting the only sound until Marion spoke.

"So as I'm sure you've all noticed by now, I'm a fairly large and strong woman. Normally Faith and Buffy wouldn't stand a chance against me, but after what I just saw, I know better. Add in that there was a demon, which is a more than a little weird…"

"Bastard! You're goin' in fucker, no matter what!"

"God, she's a riot. Anyway, what I'm getting at is that none of this is in the slightest bit normal. Are you people, I don't know, some sort of professionals who deal with the things that supposedly don't exist?"

Giles debated his answer.

"I suppose that's a somewhat accurate assessment."

"The strangest thing, well besides everything else, is that you didn't help at all with the physical part of the battle. You just kept reading out loud from that book…I know this might sound crazy, but were you casting a spell or something?"

"…had me a goddamn chainsaw. Fine, have it your way!"

The next thing they heard was a loud cracking sound, followed closely by Faith's triumphant yell:

"Told ya you was gonna fit, bitch…one way or another."

"That's quite perceptive of you, Ms. Conway. Yes, I was performing a weakening spell, and if I'd stopped or altered the rhythm in any way, I would have been required to start all over from the very beginning. Might I inquire how it is that you seem to know so much about the supernatural?"

She smiled at him again:

"When I'm not drunk, I teach folklore at the university and I also watch the Sci-Fi channel a lot. So then Rupert, would you call yourself a warlock?"

"Me? Heavens, no. I possess no special powers whatsoever."

"But Buffy and Faith clearly do."

He hesitated before answering.

"Yes they do, but I believe that's a conversation best suited…"

"Fucker's trash now, so let's motor."

"Thank you, Faith."

"No big, Giles. Tossed all the snot rags, figured nobody wanted that shit back."

"A most accurate assumption. Ms. Conway, where is your car parked?"

"It's 'Marion', Rupert, and I'm just around the corner. Where are you guys at?"

"We aren't, actually."

She was puzzled:

"You didn't drive?"

"Nah, G-man likes makin' us hoof it all over town."

He sighed in irritation.

"We were tracking the demon, and as Faith well knows, that was a task that had to be carried out on foot."

"I see. Well that works perfectly then, we can all go in my car. Rupert, will you do the honors and assume the role of 'designated driver'?"

"I'd be delighted."

She linked her arm with his again, a big smile on her face.

"Buffy, you sit up front. I think you'll be a lot more comfortable that way."

Buffy was leaning on Faith as they slowly made their way to the car, and she looked up gratefully.

"Thank…you."

"You're welcome, plus it will give me the opportunity to stare at Rupert without anyone noticing."

Giles flamed red again, and Buffy just had to laugh.

"Ha, ha, ha…Ow!"

"Ah, perchance a small lesson there, Buffy?"

"Yeah…don't get…hurt…before your…Watcher gets… hit on."

Faith gently picked Buffy up and began carrying her to the car.

"Hey…put me…down…I can…"

"Shut up, B."

"Okay."

Faith kissed her on the forehead, then grinned as she looked at Marion.

"Man, alleys sure are the hotspots in this town."

"What do you mean?"

"Me and B met in an alley not too far from here. Now you and Giles got it goin' on."

"Oh, bloody hell."

"Yeah, can definitely be hell, G-man."

Buffy looked up at her:

"Oh, really?"

"Easy, B. Just a figure of speech…again."

When they arrived at the car, Marion climbed into the back as Faith eased Buffy into the passenger seat. Giles started the engine while Faith got in behind him, and then they were on their way back to the house.
 
Buffy couldn't help but smile at the look on Giles' face. He hadn't looked like that since…well, since Jenny Calender. She glanced over her shoulder at Faith who smirked and wiggled an eyebrow at her.
 
Buffy turned back to stare out the windshield. She was irritated by Faith's brand new favorite phrase, "Just a figure of speech", and she wasn't going to let it slide without making her squirm a little bit for being such a smartass.

**B?**

She was calling to her through their bond, and Buffy ignored her.

**Gonna play hardball now?**

**…What do you want?**

**'Sides to throw you against the nearest wall and…**

**Faith, what?**

**Thinkin' this Marion chick's just right for Giles.**

**We barely know her.**

**Seems like we do though, yeah?**

**…Yes.**

There was a pause, but Buffy could feel that Faith was still there.

**So how's the ribs?**

**I'll live.**

**Ya mean it or is that just a figure of speech?**

Buffy turned to stare daggers at her before she faced the front again.

**C'mon now B, that was funny.**

**If you say so.**

**Okay ya little baby – last alley I was in and needed some privacy was with you. And there's no part of this that's like hell…'cept maybe now.**

**Well pardon me, but I believe it was you who barged into my mind. If you don't like it…**

**Know you're not really mad.**

**And how do you know that?**

**'Cause ya got this other thing runnin' through your head.**

**Which is?**

**That ya think I'm way perceptive and cute as hell. Also think I'm wicked sexy when I wiggle my eyebrows at you.**

**Fuck you, F.**

**Not with those ribs, but tell ya what: you look back here and you'll see I got my eyebrows workin' overtime for ya.**

**One day, I'm going to kill you.**

**Ain't gonna be today though, 'cause today we're in love. Now check it out, B.**

Buffy looked back then to see that Faith had her eyebrows dancing all over her face, a sight that was nothing but completely ridiculous.

Buffy rolled her eyes and laughed, which made her wince and clutch her sides a little firmer.

**What? Thought it was sexy?**

**You are absolutely nuts.**

**Part of my charm, baby.**

**Yes, it is.**

**G-Man still red?**

Buffy glanced over at him.

**Yep, fire truck.**

**Guess we'd better get used to it. Our Watcher's in love.**

CHAPTER TEN

"Okay, see? G-Man was way exaggeratin', right?"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Fuck, c'mon you guys! Maybe I was kinda cranky at the start, but by the end I was…"

Anya was the only one not avoiding eye contact with Faith.

"We all know what you're like when you don't get enough personal time with Buffy. Of course it's not healthy for anyone to be sexually frustrated, but with you it's downright dangerous."

"What's that s'posed to mean?"

"Just accept that sex with Buffy is all that keeps you sane, we have. You go right ahead and screw her brains out, we'll all sleep easier and enjoy our own sexual experiences that much more with you in mind."

When no one else said anything, Faith slumped back into her chair.

"Fine, be a buncha traitors."

"Gotta take it like a Slayer, Dark One."

She grinned at him:

"Nah Junior, I just gotta take a Slayer."

Buffy smiled, but didn't say a word as Faith pulled her closer. She didn't want to get them started again, and after a pointed look at Willow, her best friend came to the rescue with a subject change.

"So Marion, you went right after Giles."

"Yep, one look at him and I turned into a brazen hussy."

"So what made you think he was the one?"

She looked at him affectionately:

"I just knew. I took one look at his stuffy ass, and all I wanted to do was make him lose it."

"Ahh…Perhaps we shouldn't delve too deeply into that area of our relationship."

"Damn G-man, better let your hair down while ya still got some."

"Thank you for your concern Faith, but I do believe I've already done more than my share of that."

Marion snuggled into him until he smiled and kissed the top of her head.

"I'm thinking you haven't fully exhausted your share just yet, Rupert."

"Yes, I suppose I can carry on a bit longer if you're involved."

Her accent was horrible:

"Jolly good, old chap, stiff upper lip, God save the Queen, all that rot."

"Might you please put a sock in it, dear?"

He laughed as he said it, and Marion took the opportunity to lay one on him. He looked not the least bit self-conscious when they finally parted.

"My sexy, uptight, English boy."

They smiled at each other, and then Marion turned back to Willow.

"I never imagined myself with someone like Rupert, and now I just can't see myself with anyone else."

"You'd bloody well better not!"

"You don't have a thing to worry about. I knew we were destined the second I saw you."

Spike laughed:

"Can't say that 'bout Will and me."

Willow nodded.

"You were too busy trying to kill me."

He pulled her hand up to his lips and lightly kissed the back of it.

"Not the best way to start a romance, I'll grant you that."

"Not like ya do it any other way, Junior."

He looked at her.

"Like you've any room to judge, # 2."

Faith grinned at him:

"Gonna do it anyway."

"What I like best about you, Dark One. Just do what you want, logic be damned."

Buffy began laughing:

"Oh my God, remember when you guys finally figured it out? That was so funny!"

"Yeah Willow, you sounded like a total crazy person."

She smiled and shook her head:

"I think you might be exaggerating just a little, Dawnie."

Buffy couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"Will, you couldn't even remember what you were doing!"

She looked at Buffy, wondering why she had rescued her from Spike and Faith just minutes ago.

"Oh fuck B, 'member when we got there and they were…"

Willow interrupted:

"Okay, yes, we were a little on the distracted side, but..."

Faith could barely contain herself:

"'Distracted'? You were practically humpin' each other when we showed up."

Willow flushed red.

"We were not! Hello? Spike, a little assistance here."

"What you want me to say? We were a bit on the randy…"

"Spike! That is not how it was!"

He held up his hand to silence her.

"Sorry, but as I recall it, you were bein' a royal pain in the arse. Had yourself all worked into a lather just because we'd hit a bit of a snag."

"I was the pain in the ass? Me? You were so…"

"'Scuse me, believe I have the floor."

"Only because I stupidly gave it to you…Fine, go ahead."

His grin was wicked as he continued:

"So this one's all a-twitter 'cause her precious plan's been sullied. Course she was completely unreasonable, but I took the gentle approach and…"

"What you gettin' your knickers so twisted about?"

"You are so annoying!"

"Me? Was you who got us into this, but did I play the blame game? No, I did not. Took the highroad, I did."

"I got us into this mess? You're the idiot who set off the alarm! I told you to wait until I'd finished the spell and you were the one who was all: 'Bollocks to the magic, can handle this myself'."

He looked at her as if she were too stupid to be believed.

"Sure, dumb move on my part, but you'd think a powerful witch like you could make a bloke like me behave. Seems to me like you couldn't handle…"

"Shut up! Goddess, you are so…Just see if they're still there."

"Wanna know so bad? You have a look-see."

"Spike, I'm warning you…"

"Don't take orders from you. I'm strictly volunteer."

Willow was sure her head was going to explode.

"Just look!"

"Not the boss of me, Willow."

"I am on this mission!"

"Uh…sorry, no."

"I swear Spike, if you don't look…"

His smirk said it all.

"What you gonna do? Can't waste the magic juice you've got left, so you can't hurt me. Guess that means I'm…OW!"

"Now look!"

"Bloody hell, no need to go all demented! Not right for you to resort to…Right, looking now………OW!"

A stone bounced off of his head, knocking him backwards.

"They're still there and I'm concussed. Happy now?"

"I'd be overjoyed if they'd managed to knock you out."

"Hey, no call for that sort of talk. You've got no reason to…"

Willow was fiddling with her cell phone, ignoring him completely.

"There's still no signal, which makes sense after what I did. Any ideas?"

"Oh, finally admitting you could use a spot of help?  Guess you don't know it all after all, Miss……Miss Know It All. Must be tough to face up to your shortcomings, but with so many…OW!"

"If you don't have anything constructive to say, just shut up!"

He was scowling as he rubbed his arm.

"Christ, mission hits a rough patch and you go all on the rag. Can remember when you were just a sweet young girl who…"

"…who almost got killed by you fifty times! Those sure were the good old days, yes siree!"

"Oh, that how it is then? Things don't go your way, you gotta throw it in my face I used to tread on the dark side?"

"Yes!"

Now it was his turn to worry about his head exploding.

"……Well, fine! Surprised you noticed anything back then. Were way too busy mooning over the tiny little dog boy. Ha, ha, ha! You get it, Will? Mooning, werewolf…Oh, come on!"

"That's really funny, especially since the way I remember it, you were all busy being slayed by the tiny little Slayer girl."

"Yeah? Well bloke must have been quite somethin'. Some time with that git, and he had you running to the other side."

"Right, like you should talk! I've never known anyone as straight as Buffy, but after sex with you…"

He was outraged by the accusation.

"Hey, nothin' to do with me! There's some strange Slayer mojo at work…Not my fault she and the Dark One fancy each other!"

"Uh-huh, just keep telling yourself that."

"Shut your gob, Willow."

"You shut yours, Spike."

"Make me!"

"Oh, you do not wanna dare me."

"Why? What you gonna do about it…witch?"

"You don't want to know…vampire."

"I supposed to be all scared and…"

Willow grabbed his head and literally slammed her lips to his. To say he was shocked was more than an understatement. He was…shocked.

Her tongue slid into his mouth, and he let out a low groan as it began mingling with his. He pulled her closer and her body felt like fire where it brushed against him. His heart felt like it wanted to beat, his lungs felt like they needed to breathe, and although he could feel every one of his many years, he suddenly felt young again.

She ended the kiss, pulling back with a stunned look on her face as she stared directly into his eyes. She raised an unsteady hand to her lips, then just held it there while he spoke:

"What the hell was that?"

"I…I'm not sure."

"But how could you…"

"Still with the 'not sure', Spike."

"Willow, aren't you…"

"Gay? Yes…no…maybe?"

He sat there looking totally mystified.

"Well, right out of nowhere, this is."

"I'm not so sure about that."

"Not following, Will."

She finally lowered her hand from her mouth.

"Well…is this what all the teasing and arguing has really been about?"

His face was stunned:

"…You're sayin' maybe it's been sexual tension?"

"Yeah…maybe."

"It can't be, can it?"

"I don't know."

"But Willow, aren't you gay?"

She thought it through:

"Well, I always liked guys before Tara came along. I mean, I couldn't have been any crazier about Xander and Oz, but then there was Tara and…I don't know…I think maybe I'm bi…maybe."

"Gotta say – this back and forthin's a tad confusing."

"You should feel it from in here."

They sat quietly until he clapped his hands:

"Right then. Only one thing for it."

"Try it again?"

"Yeah, more than likely nothin' but a fluke."

Willow was nodding vigorously.

"You know, I'll bet that's all it was. I mean, if you computed the statistical probability, the number would probably skew way over to the 'flukey' side of things. Most likely there are a whole bunch of theorems that would make the flukiness just as clear as…"

"Not really the time to geek it up."

She flushed.

"Well sorry, but that's who I am! If me being such a geek bothers you so much, why don't we just forget the whole thing Mr.…"

"Didn't say it bothered me. I said…"

"…'Ooh Look at Me with My Mysterious Swirly Coat and My Sexy High Cheekbones'…"

This time it was Spike who pulled her close. Their lips met again and it wasn't at all like before…it was better.

His mind began flying as his senses kicked into overdrive. He heard her heart speeding up, heard her blood rushing through her veins, and he felt her warm body molding itself to his in all the right places. He knew it for sure then: he was in love with Willow.

Somehow, somewhere it had snuck up on him. He wanted her, wanted her to love him back, and he wanted her body to stay right where it was forever.

He wasn't a fickle man when it came to love. He was definitely a fool, a hopeless romantic, yes, but he had never been one to give his heart casually. In his long life, he had loved exactly three women: Drusilla, Buffy, and now this redheaded lesbian witch.

Apparently he'd had feelings for her for a long time, but he had pushed them aside because she was all about the ladies. Or not, based on the way she was pulling on his ass trying to get him even closer to her. Evidently Willow Rosenberg was no longer playing for the other team; his witch had been traded.

He began laughing. For so long now he'd been yearning for that "special" someone to come along, and she had been standing right in front of him day after day – bantering, aggravating, and simply mesmerizing him. They had become friends, good friends, and then something else had…

Willow began laughing as well, and they were forced to break off their kiss.

"Spike, are we laughing at the same thing?"

"Doubt it. Suspect you're laughing because for a moment it seemed like you could get involved with a vampire."

"No, I'm laughing because I've been wondering if there would ever be anyone else for me, and you've been right here all this time."

"Oh…Guess we're laughin' at the same thing then."

Willow paused before she spoke, her face so serious it made Spike nervous.

"I think the smart thing here would be to slow down and think things through."

"Right, sure, of course. You should take your time and think things over."

"But then I think I already know how I feel."

"Oh…and how's that?"

Her "Resolve Face" made an appearance:

"You go first."

"No, you go."

"No Spike, go!"

"You have to go first!"

"Says who?"

"Says me, Willow!"

"But I'm the boss here!"

"No, you're not! Bloody ego's well out of order!"

"It is not! And I am too in charge of this mission!"

"Doin' a bang up job of it, you are."

Her face flushed again and she wanted to kill him.

"That's your fault for not following my orders!"

"Beat a dead horse, why don't you?"

"Trust me, that's so not the dead thing I want to beat!"

"Just try it, Willow!"

"Don't tempt me, Spike!"

"Ooh, got me all aquiver with fear."

"Goddess, I could just…"

They grabbed for each other again, and as things heated up, Willow's phone rang. Five rings later, she managed to answer it somewhat breathlessly.

"…Hello?"

"Will, are you guys all right?!"

"Us? Yeah, we're fine, Buffy. Why do you ask?"

"Because you didn't check in when you were supposed to! You sound out of breath, are you okay?"

"Me? Yep, I've got plenty of breath, so much breath I'm breathing for two…Ha, ha, ha! I mean, no, breath is definitely not the issue here."

"…Willow, what's going on?"

Willow leaned back against the wall:

"Oh, not much. We're kind of hunkered down because we set off the alarm. We can't get a signal on the phone yet, but when we can we're going to call for help."

"…I see. And when you call for this help, you are planning to call me, right?"

"Well duh, of course Buffy, who else would we call?"

"Right…Hey, could I speak to Spike?"

"Why?"

"Because you're…"

"I mean, we should probably try to save the battery too, you know?"

"……Will, you do know we're speaking on the phone, don't you?"

Willow was clearly startled at the news, but she tried to cover:

"What? Oh yeah, of course I do. Sorry, I'm kinda distracted here."

"That's okay…So can you put Spike on now?"

"Sure, but how come?"

"No reason, it's just that you sound a little strange and I want to make sure everything's okay."

"Oh, well when you consider what's been going here, I think I'm doing pretty good. Can you keep a secret, Buff?"

"Of course I can, but now's not the right time to…"

"Spike and I just kissed, and all I can say is wow…like in 'Wow!'. I think I'm in love with him, and I know for sure I'm in lust. As Faith would say: I'm ready to start driving stick again, and I'll tell you Buffy, I haven't been this ready in forever. 'Ready' comes nowhere near what I am. I'm…"

"…share. We're on speaker phone."

Willow turned red and found herself hoping for the best.

"Oh…Just you and Faith?"

"No, not exactly."

"Xander and Anya too?"

"Yeah, and…"

"Dawnie?"

"She's here and so's…"

"Hi, Giles."

He had to clear his throat loudly before he could speak:

"Ah yes…Hello there, Willow."

"Great, everybody's listening. I wonder what the odds are of that?"

Buffy spoke up again:

"Probably pretty good since we're all doing a mission and waiting for you to call us."

"Jesus Red, what the hell kinda kiss was this?"

"Look guys, I have to go. We can talk about it later."

She disconnected the call and looked over at Spike.

"Um…I kind of just 'outed' us to everybody, which is way ironic in a way, and I know we're not even out to ourselves yet, but…"

"I heard."

The phone rang again and Willow tried not to sound irritated as she answered it.

"Hello?"

"Will, it's me again."

"Buffy, I really do wanna talk to you about this, but Spike and I haven't even had a chance to sort it out yet. Could you please try to be a little more patient? I promise we'll talk soon, plus I'm kinda worried you might have some issues with…Oh Goddess, Buffy, is that why you keep calling? Do you have issues with all of this? Is it like a 'sore spot' issue? Or maybe you're just being you and you didn't even think about having issues until I made you think about them! I'm so stupid sometimes, I didn't mean…"

"Will…Willow, I'm fine, okay? I have no issues, not now and not before. I won't be having any in the future either."

The relief Willow felt came through loud and clear:

"Really? So you're okay with it?  Whew, that's huge, for sure. Can you imagine how weird and awkward it would be if you were upset? I'd never wanna hurt you, Buffy, or do anything that would make things weird between us."

"Fuck me, ya sayin' they can get weirder than this?"

"…Oh…Hi, Faith. I guess we're still on the speaker phone then."

"Afraid so."

"Well, isn't this fun? Anyway, thanks for calling me back. It means a lot, but I really do have to talk to Spike now. He's just been waiting patiently, but I'll call you as soon as I can, maybe tomorrow, okay?"

"But Will…"

"Bye, everybody!"

"…aren't you pinned down in a dangerous situation?"

There was a pause and then:

"'Pinned down'? Yes, we are! We need to be rescued!"

"I thought so. Are you at the exit point?"

"Yes, and we've got the scrolls."

"That's great! Okay, you guys stay put, Faith and I will be there in a few minutes. We'll create a diversion and then you two can make a break for it."

"I'm not insane, Buffy. I know the plan."

"Maybe not insane, but ya sure as hell sound nuts."

"Shut up, Faith."

Willow could hear her laughing, but Buffy talked over her:

"We're on our way, so don't do anything. Just wait for the diversion."

"I promise, Buff, we'll stay where we are."

"Can ya promise to have all your clothes on when we get there?"

"Like you should talk."

"Just sayin'…"

"What I'm saying, Faith, is that if you don't shut up, I'm going to start spilling your secrets all over the wonderful speaker phone."

"Wow, scary. Hey, what base you guys at, Red?"

"Buffy, I'm not kidding!"

"Faith, be quiet. Sit tight, Will, we'll be right there."

"But B, that's true love on the line. No way can ya stop it!"

Willow disconnected the call and looked at Spike. He was obviously amused and completely unperturbed.

"I'm sorry, Spike. I guess my mind got a little frazzled by the smoochies."

"Fine by me, take it as a compliment. 'Sides, never was fond of the whole 'secret romance' approach."

She looked at him shyly:

"So what do you think it all means?"

"Got it sussed on my end."

"You do?"

"Yeah."

"And?"

"I'm in love with you. Have been for some time now."

"Oh."

Now it was his turn to look uncertain.

"Was really hopin' you might feel the same."

She nodded, but she didn't look at him.

"It's just kind of scary, you know?"

"Yeah, feels like that over here too."

They sat in silence for a couple of minutes, each lost in their own thoughts.

"I don't think it's complicated though."

He looked up at her words, his head tilted as he waited for her to explain.

"I'm in love with you too, Spike."

The smile he gave her was huge:

"Well, isn't that mad brilliant?"

"Yeah, it really kinda is."

"Guess we got us a romance then."

Her lips were just a whisper from his:

"Want to hear the theorem that best proves it?"

"Sure. Nothin' sexier than when you go all smart."

"You're pretty sexy yourself."

He smiled, his tongue tracing lightly along her top lip:

"Always thought so, but glad you finally noticed."

"I've always noticed that, but I wonder..."

"What?"

"Never mind, there's plenty of time for that later."

He pulled back:

"Look, you're not doin' some big makeover. This is what I am and this is what I'm stayin'!"

"Calm down, it's just a tiny adjustment with your hair."

"My hair?! My bloody hair's perfect…What's wrong with my hair?"

She grabbed his hand:

"There's nothing wrong with your hair. I was just wondering…if you let it grow a little longer, would it go all curly?"

"Oh..Yeah, could do that if you want. Not such a big thing."

She kissed him on the cheek, then made her way up to his ear:

"'Cause I was thinking I might need something to hold onto."

He growled and pulled her onto his lap.

"Count on that, you little witch."

They kissed again, and this time they didn't stop. They fit together perfectly, and Willow soon found herself wondering why they had so many clothes between them.

"Stand back B, gonna have to hose'em down!"

"Buffy, Faith, look out! They've got stones!"

"Thinkin' your boy toy there's got'em all."

Buffy stepped in front of a grinning Faith.

"It's okay, Will, we took care of them."

Willow looked around.

"Oh…I guess we didn't notice the diversion."

"Kinda tough to notice anything, Red, with a tongue shoved down your throat."

Willow glared at her:

"I am not responding, Faith."

"Awww…c'mon, Willow.  Don't spoil my fun."

"Buffy, can't you shut her up?"

Buffy smiled apologetically:

"Apparently not."

They stood up, Spike with the scrolls under his arm and a sly grin on his face. Faith was at his side in an instant.

"So Junior, turnin'em straight now. Nice comeback!"

They gave each other an exuberant high five.

"Gotta say I'm pleased. Just had to give her a taste and she was all ready and…"

"What did you just say?"

He looked up in a near panic to see Willow staring at him.

"Me? Nothing! Not my fault, #2's the one who started it. Not mad at me, are you, Will? Willow? Oh, come on!"

She walked away from him, joining Buffy as they headed down the sidewalk. Spike and Faith trailed behind, Spike seemingly already recovered from Willow's anger as he regaled Faith with his version of how he kept the mission on track.

"I swear, Buffy, I'm never going to make it. He's just so…so…"

"He's Spike, Willow, and that's going to be absolutely perfect."

"Yeah, I know, but he's just so annoying. One minute he's so sweet I could die, then the next he's so crude I totally want to kill…"

"Hey B, gotta tell ya: your ass looks so fuckin' hot from back here! Could definitely hit that all night long!"

Buffy and Willow looked at each other.

"We'll start a support group, Will."

"Okay."

CHAPTER ELEVEN

"Damn, didn't think they'd ever leave."

"Oh come on, you were having a great time."

"Sure, but all I really wanted was to be right here."

They were lying in bed, Buffy's head on Faith's shoulder and Faith's arms wrapped snugly around her.

"I've been looking forward to it too." 

"Nice to be alone again. Been missin' all the noise you make."

Buffy nipped her shoulder, making Faith jump slightly.

"I guess I more than made up for that."

"Bet your ass ya did."

"Do you have to be so smug?"

"You're hoarse from screamin' B, so yeah, I'm gonna be smug."

They snuggled together comfortably, Buffy's hand tracing slow, lazy circles along Faith stomach, while Faith wove her fingers leisurely through Buffy's hair.

"Did you see how much Giles was blushing when Marion…"

Faith laughed:

"Fuck, thought he was gonna blow."

"It was sweet though."

"Yeah, it was."

"They're my favorite couple, except for us."

"Goes without sayin'."

Buffy sighed contentedly:

"Remember when I asked you to marry me?"

"When ya what? Sorry, not ringin' any…OW!"

Buffy was leaning up, ready to strike again:

"What about now?"

"Like it was yesterday."

Buffy made herself comfortable again, loving the feeling of Faith's warm skin.

"God, I was so nervous."

"Ya think?"

"And I was already completely crazy before you got home."

Faith smiled as she thought back.

"Yet you still managed to ramp it right the fuck up."

"Well excuse me, it was only the most important question ever asked."

"No argument here."

"Poor Will, she's probably still scarred."

"That's what happens when ya run'em through the wringer."

Buffy's laugh vibrated right through Faith, making her want her all over again, but Buffy was too busy moseying her way down Memory Lane. It didn't matter to Faith. She could wait and besides, Memory Lane was a great place to be, especially when Buffy told this story.

"I was so awful, Faith. I had my speech all prepared, and of course I had to run it by her about a million times. And keep in mind, I was cruising nowhere near any kind of saneness. In fact…"

"So?"

"It's good."

"Good?"

"Great."

"But you didn't say 'great' at first, you said 'good'."

Willow slowly let out a breath, taking great care to keep the reassuring smile on her face.

"Buffy, that's because I've run out of adjectives after hearing it forty-six times. Remember I called it 'fantastic', 'beautiful', 'spectacular', and 'wonderful'? It's perfect, honest it is."

Buffy flung her head back against the couch and closed her eyes. When she opened them, she didn't look any calmer.

"I'm sorry, Will. I don't know why I'm so nervous."

"Maybe because it's not every day you ask someone to marry you."

"Yeah, that's probably the reason. I mean, I've never done this before."

Willow's smile was warm and she coupled it by squeezing Buffy's hand, again all reassuringly.

"Hence we have the extremely understandable jumpies and crazy talk."

"Right, all understandable, normal even…but…"

"…"

"…"

"Buffy?"

"…God Will, what if she says 'no'?"

"Who? Faith?"

"No, Anya…Of course Faith!"

"Why would Faith say 'no'?"

"Maybe because she doesn't want to marry me."

Willow put her hands on Buffy's shoulders and concentrated on the reassuring thing even harder than before.

"Buffy, Faith is crazy about you."

"Yeah, but this is eternal, knot-tying, bound for life stuff. What if it's too much and she doesn't want…"

"Faith is in love with you and she's going to say 'yes'."

"But she's never asked me, not once. That has to mean something, right? Don't you think that has to mean something?"

"I think it just means she's never asked you. Buffy, we're talking about Faith, right? She…"

Buffy shot to her feet:

"Yes, we're talking about Faith. Why do you keep asking me that?!"

"I wasn't asking, I was telling you…"

Buffy began pacing, her face full of every emotion there was.

"Will, I won't be able to take it if she says 'no'."

"Faith loves you, 'crazy love' loves you. There's no way she's not going to say 'yes'. If she's never asked you, it's probably because she thought it should be up to you."

"Me? Why me? This is so scary and…"

"Well, maybe she was scared too."

Buffy sat back down:

"God, this is so much pressure. Maybe I should just wait and…No, I want this. I want her."

"Yes you do, and you're off to a great start. Everything's almost ready and…"

"I've got all of her favorite things, it's just us with no distractions and no slaying, all night long."

"And it's gonna be perfect."

Buffy finally looked calmer and Willow relaxed a little herself. Being best friends with the Slayer wasn't easy sometimes.

"Okay then, I should get going."

"What?!"

"You know, the 'making myself scarce' part of the evening…Ow…Buffy, you're kind of crushing my arm here."

Her grip loosened immediately, but she didn't let go:

"Do you really have to leave? I mean, you could…"

"Buff, just the two of you, no distractions, remember? She's going to be here soon, so I need to be gone. Just take a deep breath, well maybe you need to take several, and try to calm down."

"Deep breathing, I've done that before."

Willow stood, pulling Buffy with her.

"I promise you she's going to say 'yes'. Then you guys are going to laugh and cry, then comes the smoochies and the x-rated portion of the evening. Then it's onto the cuddles and more sweet smoochies, which will probably lead you guys right back to the x-rated stuff again. You're going to have a great night with the woman who is going to marry you. Now come on, you can do this!"

"Right, you're right. I can do this…Okay, yes. You leave now."

They both walked to the front door and when they got there, Buffy hugged her gratefully.

"Thanks, Will."

"Best friend's job, although I think I do it pretty well."

"That's an understatement."

They let go of each other, and Willow stepped out onto the porch.

"But you know how it goes, Buff. You'll just pay me back later."

"Yep, we've definitely got the whole 'tit for tat' thing going on. So, okay…I'll call you later, hopefully not until tomorrow though."

"I'll keep my fingers crossed, but I…"

Buffy shot out onto the porch:

"Your fingers are going to be crossed?! For luck?! Oh God Will, do you think I'm going to need luck?!"

"No, I just meant…"

"I know what you meant! This is a disaster, isn't it? Just tell me the truth…I can take it!"

"Buffy, stop it! You're the Slayer, now toughen up and get back in there."

"But…"

Willow pulled out her "Resolve Face"; she had to.

"Buffy Anne Summers, you are going to do this. Now go back inside and finish getting ready."

"Please stay. You can be like my coach and…"

Faith entered the house through the kitchen door:

"B, I'm home!"

She took off her jacket and tossed it onto a barstool. It had been a long and rotten day, and she was glad to be home.

"What's with the lights?"

She turned the switch and as the light brightened, so did she.

"Yeah, takeout!"

Buffy came back in and leaned against the front door as she closed it. She knew she was being ridiculous and she knew Willow was right. Faith loved her, she loved Faith, and they loved each other. There was no reason to be so worked up.

Everything was going to be okay. They had talked about getting married a few years ago, and to Buffy's happy surprise, Faith had liked the idea. In fact, she had more than liked it, she'd been all for it, which made it crystal clear that Buffy had nothing to be nervous about now…even though that discussion had taken place a long time ago at Xander and Anya's reception, and Faith could have easily changed her mind since then.

Buffy straightened her shoulders and made herself calm down. She still needed to get the table set up, so she'd just concentrate on that. Faith would be home soon and she wanted everything in place and ready to go when she got there.

"Better move your ass while there's still some food left!"

Buffy couldn't believe it, Faith was already home…

"Last chance, Blondie! Starvin' down here and not gonna wait."

…and eating before she was supposed to!

Buffy tore into the kitchen to see Faith digging through one of the bags of food. She emerged with a piece of chicken and a happy grin.

"Hey, there's my girl. Must be psychic 'cause I…"

"No!"

"Huh?"

"Stop!"

"But…"

"Get up!"

"What the…"

Buffy yanked her off the counter.

"Go back out and come in the front door."

"Do what?"

"You're not here yet."

"B, you okay?"

"Fine. Go."

"Listen, been a real shitty day and I'm not lookin' to play games. All I want's to eat and relax a little 'fore we patrol, so if ya don't mind…Hey!"

Buffy snatched the chicken from her hand and shoved her outside.

"Go use the front door!"

The kitchen door slammed right in Faith's face.

"Jesus, what day is this? Let's see……No, not that time yet. What the hell's goin' on?"

She tried to open the door, but it was locked.

"Oh for fuck's sake."

She trudged around to the front door, only to discover that it too was securely locked. She rang the bell and waited.

After three more rings, she started digging through her pockets looking for her key…which was in her jacket which was now spread out over a barstool in the kitchen.

"Shit."

She rang the bell again, then tried knocking as she peered in through the glass. She couldn't see anything because it was dark and there was nothing to see anyway. She stood there becoming more irritated by the second.

"This is fucked up! Oughta just kick the fuckin' door down."

She decided she'd give it one more ring, and then she was going in…one way or the other. She rang, there was no response, and there was no more patience. She lifted her foot and then smashed her way right into her own fucking house.

Except Buffy chose precisely that moment to fling open the door, causing Faith to stumble and nearly fall on her face. She banged into the door frame before she managed to catch her balance.

"Ow! Where the hell have you been? Ya mind lettin' me…"

"Would you please stop with the bell and just behave normally?"

"Any chance of you takin' your own friggin' advice? Look B, I don't have…"

Buffy slammed the second door of the night in her face.

"…my goddamn key!"

She was officially confused. Maybe she'd counted wrong……Nope, still definitely not that time yet, and there was no way Buffy could be pregnant.

"What the fuck is the fucking deal?"

Faith let out a huge sigh and walked around to the backyard to grab the hidden key. She found it just where it was supposed to be, picked it up, and then stood looking at the house. She wasn't in the mood to tromp all over the place on some stupid whim, and the kitchen door was right there. She could just…

"I am so fuckin' whipped."

She walked back around and let herself in through the front door, and for some reason Buffy was nowhere in sight. The whole situation was quickly making its way past irritating.

"B? Finally in!"

Buffy came running from the direction of the dining room:

"You're home!'

"Yeah, for like the third fuckin' time now."

"You look hungry."

"…Yeah, still starvin' here."

"Good, go take a shower."

Faith had had enough.

"Yeah, maybe that makes sense to you, but gonna grab some chow first."

Buffy stopped her march to the kitchen before she'd even managed a full step. She grabbed onto Faith's arm, spun her around, and shoved her with Slayer strength towards the stairs.

"Shower now!"

"What the fuck is…Fine! Can I go straight up or do I gotta come back in again?"

"Just go shower, okay?"

Faith was all ready to refuse, but then her eyes met Buffy's and it was time for another round of: "Whip the Slayer".

"Alright…but maybe I could just take that piece of chicken with…Stop shovin', B, I'm goin'!"

She took the fastest shower ever and was just pulling on her favorite sweats when the phone rang. She answered it almost before the first ring had finished.

"Buffy's Nuthouse."

"Faith……Giles here."

"Hey G-Man, what's up?"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Hello?"

"Ah, yes…hello."

"Somethin' ya want, 'sides to push me right over the fucking edge?"

He cleared his throat loudly:

"It's most unfortunate that you're there."

"Startin' to think that myself."

"This is just dreadful, and I'm not at all clear how I could have made such a mistake…Drat! This bloody watch has stopped!"

"Yeah? Okay then, been a real slice, but I got my own…"

Just then, Faith heard Buffy pick up the extension.

"I got it B, it's just Giles."

"What?! Hang up, Faith."

Buffy was pissed.

"Giles, what did I tell you?"

"Buffy, I'm terribly sorry. It seems that my watch stopped working and I simply lost track of…"

"Unless the world is ending in the next ten seconds, I'm going to kill you."

"No, no, it's nothing like that. There's no trouble whatsoever."

"Oh, you're very wrong about that."

Giles was completely flustered:

"I'm truly sorry, Buffy. I was merely hoping to catch Willow and thought I had plenty of time before I was guilty of intruding."

"Either of you wanna clue me in?"

"Faith, I told you to hang up, now hang up! You too, Giles!"

Faith couldn't believe what she was hearing, and she wasn't taking it without saying something back.

"Well, guess I don't feel like doin' what I'm told. Now what the fuck's goin' on here?"

Buffy didn't say a word, even though Faith gave her a minute.

"B, you been actin' like a lunatic ever since I got home…the first fucking time…and now you're reamin' out Giles just for calling? Since you're so big with the orders tonight, here's some for you: I want some goddamn answers, and I want'em right the fuck now."

All she got was silence, and that wasn't nearly good enough.

"I mean it, B, what the hell's…"

"If you'd like to make a call…"

She slammed the phone down before the recording could really get it going, no longer wondering how Buffy had managed to keep her mouth shut for the entire tirade.

"Fuck me, this is fucking nuts."

"Faith, are you coming?!"

Buffy's voice carried easily from the foot of the stairs.

"Yeah, fuckin' unglued…On my way, B!"

She followed her nose to the dining room and then finally saw what had Buffy in such a monster uproar.

The table was set for two with the good china, there were flowers all over the place, soft but good music was playing, and the only light was coming from the candles Buffy had lit. It was completely romantic and beautiful and…Oh shit.

Buffy stood there smiling, and Faith felt the panic rising.

"Wow, B this is…It's not our anniversary, is it?"

"No."

Faith's relief was plain to see.

"Okay, so I didn't fuck up. Then what's all this?"

"I wanted to do something special for you."

"Yeah? Well, ya really got it rockin'. Everything looks great."

Buffy pulled her chair out for her:

"If you'll take your seat, dinner will be served."

Faith sat down and watched as it took Buffy six trips to bring in all of the food. Between trips three and four, she managed to snag an arm and pull Buffy down onto her lap.

"Sure could use a kiss, B. Fact is…I gotta have it."

"I think I can help you out."

They kissed and when Faith let her go, Buffy's smile was huge as she practically skipped her way back into the kitchen.

There were three more trips, and then Buffy took her seat.

"All right, that's everything."

Faith looked around the table and couldn't believe it.

"Got all my faves here, B."

"I wasn't sure what you'd be in the mood for, so I got some of everything. Is that okay?"

"'Okay'? Hell yeah, it's 'okay'. It's fuckin' fantastic!"

"So you like it?"

"I love it! Did I do somethin' good? Know last night was pretty hot, but didn't think…"

Buffy laughed:

"This has nothing to do with last night, at least not the way you mean it. Try the beer."

Faith lifted the bottle and took a big swig.

"Damn, it's perfect. Ice cold, little bit of frost on the bottle…How the hell did you get it? You swing by Bean Town today?"

"Let's just say I have my ways."

"You sure as hell do, B."

"Well go ahead, dig in!"

They ate mostly in a comfortable silence because Faith was so busy shoveling it in, she didn't have much time for chatting. When they were finished, Buffy cleared their plates and headed for the kitchen.

"I hope you saved some room for dessert."

"Pretty stuffed, B. Whatcha got?"

"A fudge ripple ice cream cake."

"Think I can do it some damage."

Faith ate every bite of her dessert and then leaned back in her chair.

"Christ, what a feast. That's the best meal I've ever had in my whole life. Can't believe you went to all that trouble."

"It wasn't any trouble. I just wanted to make you happy."

Buffy's voice sounded so sexy, Faith felt a shiver run down her spine.

"Definitely did what ya set out to. Thanks, B."

"Let's go into the living room."

They linked hands and Buffy steered them to the couch where they sat side by side. The lights were down low and there were candles and flowers all over the place. It looked beautiful, and Faith was getting happier and happier by the second because it was obvious that mind blowing sex was just around the corner.

The thought of paying Buffy back for the delicious meal they'd just enjoyed already had Faith's mind spinning. All she could think about was how much she loved Buffy, how lucky she was to have her, and how she was going to get her to skip patrol so that she could make her scream all night long.

It couldn't have been easy to round up all of the food, and she had no idea how in the hell Buffy had been able to get everything, including the beer. It was such a loving thing to do, and what Faith liked best about it was that it was real.

Most girlfriends would have made or bought some fancy dinner, but not Buffy. She knew what Faith enjoyed the most and that was what she had given her. To hell with what you were "supposed" to do, to hell with putting on any airs, Buffy was only interested in what would make Faith the happiest.

In just a few minutes, Faith was going to be totally focused on what would make Buffy the happiest. She was going to let her know just how much she appreciated the dinner, and there wasn't going to be any doubt about it. Faith liked to repay her debts, and this was the kind of debt she couldn't repay fast enough.

She was going to make the whole rest of the night all about Buffy, and…She didn't know if it was just her imagination, but it seemed like Buffy's eyes suddenly became even more beautiful than they usually were. It was like there was a light flowing out of them, and it made her look like some kind of goddess.

Faith was lost, sinking deeper and faster into the beauty that was the woman she loved. She kept staring, looking for a flaw where there was none. Buffy was just perfect and…

It finally registered that the room had fallen silent and that Buffy was waiting for an answer.

"Uh…sure."

"What?"

"I mean, of course not."

"Are you kidding me…"

"Ya know what a kidder I am."

"…because this is so not the time for kidding."

"Definitely not."

"Faith?"

"Sorry."

"'Sorry'? That's it?"

"Um…"

"You're not even going to explain?!"

"B, calm down. I was just…"

"'Kidding'. Yes, I heard you. Well this isn't a joke to me, I didn't think it would be to you either. You know, it wasn't easy for me, but I did it, and I never imagined you'd respond like this. God Faith, how do you think that makes me feel?"

"Pretty pissed, by the looks of it. Just hold on, I didn't…"

Buffy stood up angrily.

"I'll tell you what – just forget I said anything. My mistake."

"B, I don't know what I want 'cause…"

"'You don't know what you want'? Since when? How did we get here?"

"You're askin' me? I got no clue. I…"

"I guess I didn't either...God…Fuck you, Faith!"

"What? B, wait a sec. What in the hell…"

But Buffy was gone, and Faith found herself standing alone in the living room like a big dumb ass.

She counted slowly, twice, and she was positive…it was definitely not that time. She was also positive that she wanted to kick herself for not paying attention to whatever it was that Buffy had been talking about.

She started climbing the stairs and before she was even halfway up, she could hear Buffy sobbing. She had absolutely no clue what it was all about, and she tried to figure it out before she got to the bedroom.

They'd had a fantastic dinner, Buffy had been all loving, they'd moved it to the front room, and Faith knew for a fact that they were headed for some epic sex. Then her mind had started drifting like it did sometimes when she was near Buffy, and before she knew it, her world had gone to shit.

Now it was all just yelling, confusion, and Buffy lying on their bed crying like her heart was broken for real. Faith stood silently in the doorway wondering what could possibly be so wrong.

She entered the room and sat lightly on the edge of the bed next to Buffy.

"B?"

There was no response, if she didn't count the horrible sound of Buffy bawling her head off.

"B, c'mon…Please don't cry."

There was still no reaction, so Faith began rubbing Buffy's back in slow, soothing circles in the hope that it would somehow help her calm down.

That would be a "no".

Faith's eyes began watering as her wrist started getting crushed. She tried not to whimper, but she wasn't entirely successful as Buffy glared at her.

"Don't…you…touch…me."

She flung Faith's hand away from her like it was contaminated, and Faith wondered how long it would be until she had even partial feeling back. She couldn't worry about it though because something really big was wrong, and she didn't have a clue what it was.

"B, gotta listen to me, okay?"

I've heard all I want to from you."

"Look, everything was goin' so great and I get I ruined it somehow, but I don't know what I did that…"

Buffy rolled over to sit up on the side of the bed, forcing Faith to stand.

"Did you just say you don't know what you did?"

"Yeah. See, I wasn't…"

She was slammed up against the wall, her feet dangling well off the floor as Buffy's hand gripped her by the throat.

"'You don't know what you did'? You'd better be fucking possessed!"

Faith fought for air to get the words out:

"B…was thinkin'…what we…"

"Do you know how much effort I put into this?"

"Was beau…tiful, B."

"How scared I've been that something would go wrong?"

"Guess somethin'…did, but…"

"I wanted this so much."

"Wanted…what?"

Buffy's grip loosened slightly as the hurt on her face increased.

"Then to have you just act like it's no big deal. God, do you have any idea how much you've hurt me?"

Faith tried to charm her:

"Think my neck's got a clue…Ack!...Shit…B, didn't…hurt you on…purpose. You know…how much I…love you."

The pressure eased again, but Faith didn't even think about trying to be funny this time.

"Just let me explain. Please, Buffy?"

Buffy let go and stalked back over to the bed. She sat down, but Faith didn't kid herself. She looked like a live grenade with the pin just barely in place. One wrong word and Buffy was going to blow.

She wanted to take a minute to savor the fact that she could breathe again without every inhalation feeling like wet fire as she tried to suck it in, but the look on Buffy's face had her speaking up without delay.

"B, when we got to the couch, I started thinkin' about all the things I wanted to do to you. Was gonna show you just how much that dinner meant to me, but then I noticed how beautiful your eyes were, and I was just gone. Didn't hear anything you said, but I was tryin' to bluff my way out of it. I'd never hurt you like this, you know I wouldn't, B. Shoulda just told ya I wasn't listenin', but I didn't wanna get you upset, so I…"

"You didn't hear me?'

"Not one damn word. I'm sorry, Buffy. Can see it musta been important and I should have been listenin' instead of…"

She was slammed up against the wall again, only this time Buffy's body was plastered to hers. and her lips were being captured in a series of passionate kisses.

"You didn't hear me…Not one word…Oh, Faith…Did I hurt you? I'm so sorry, let me look…God, I love you!"

Faith was seriously wondering about the date again. How could it not be that time? Was she doing the math right?

"Are you okay, Faith? Do you need some water?"

"I'm fine, B."

"Come here, come sit down."

Buffy led her gently to the bed and they sat side by side, holding hands. It was déjà vu all over again, except this time Faith was concentrating on every word that came out of Buffy's mouth.

She was concentrating harder than she'd ever concentrated in her entire life, and there was no way she was going to miss anything. There wasn't going to be any more stupidity, she was focused on staying focused. Plus her neck and wrist were killing her, and there was no way she could take it if Buffy started crying again.

"Downstairs…well, I told you I loved you, Faith."

"I love you too, B."

"I know you do, that's why…Okay, never mind. Can we just start over and forget that happened?"

"Hell yeah! Pay ya if we could."

Buffy laughed nervously, but she also looked determined. Faith waited patiently, paying attention every second while she did.

"I…I did a little speech before, but I can't do that again, at least not right now. Right now, I just really need you to answer me."

"Sure, ask away."

"Okay…Faith, will you marry me?"

"…"

"Faith?"

"…"

"Faith, don't start this again!"

"No."

"What?!"

"No, I mean 'no I won't start it again'."

"Okay…Okay, let's both calm down."

Faith was nodding her agreement almost frantically.

"Great idea."

Buffy drew in a huge breath and let it out slowly.

"All right, they say the third time's the charm, so here we go: Faith, will you marry me?"

"Fuckin' bet your ass I will!"

"You will?"

"Jesus Christ B, of course I will!"

"You want to marry me?"

"Damn right I do!"

"You really…"

Faith kissed her then, softly at first, but then with a passionate forcefulness that made her feelings completely clear without any doubt.

"I definitely, absolutely, bet your fucking ass, wanna marry you."

They kissed again, and Buffy pushed her back onto the bed, following right behind her.

"Okay, that's a huge relief."

"You asked me that downstairs?"

"Yep, with a big romantic build-up and everything."

Faith reached up and gently caressed her cheek.

"I'm sorry, B. Was just all caught up in what I was gonna do when we got up here, and then you looked so beautiful…Fuck, I'm really sorry."

Buffy rested her full weight on Faith's body, nuzzling into her neck.

"Hmm…I'm not sure how you can ever make it up to me."

"Anything ya want."

"Anything?"

Faith didn't hesitate:

"You name it, it's yours."

Buffy's teeth nibbled, her tongue trailing along behind.

"Really, F?"

"Give ya my word…whatever you want."

Buffy lifted her head so that she was looking directly into Faith's eyes:

"I want to know what your last name is."

"What?!"

"And I believe you just promised me."

"I…What the fuck kinda thing is that to want?"

"It's a 'Buffy' kinda thing, and it seems like so little to ask after what you just put me through."

Faith knew she was trapped, and Buffy leaned down to kiss her again.

"Come on, baby. You were going to have to tell me sooner or later."

"B……shit."

"Let's hear it."

"You promise you're not gonna laugh?"

"Yes."

Faith looked skeptical.

"I mean it, B. Gotta swear to me."

"Faith, I swear I will not laugh when you tell me your last name. Slayer to Slayer, I promise."

"…Okay……It's…uh……"

"So your last name is 'Uh'? I have to admit, I never imagined anything like that."

Faith sat up, taking Buffy with her.

"Sure there's not somethin' else ya want? 'Cause when I said 'anything', I really meant anything."

Buffy snuggled in on Faith's lap, her lips kissing their way up her neck to her jaw, and then stopping right at the corner of her mouth to whisper:

"I'm positive. Now what is your last name?"

"…And you're not gonna laugh?"

Buffy delivered a kiss after each word:

"I…will...most…definitely…not...laugh."

"Oh fuck…Okay, it's…it's 'Winters'."

A person could have heard a pin drop…if that person had one of those state of the art systems that narrowed in on a specific sound as it filtered everything else out. But for those stuck with just the regular, two ear set-up, all they would have been able to hear was the sound of Buffy laughing so hard, she was just about screaming.

"B, you promised!"

Yes, Buffy knew she had, and somewhere deep inside she probably felt bad that she'd broken that promise. But the biggest part of her didn't care. It was just too funny and too unbelievable to be believed.

Faith Winters.

She laughed for a really long time, maybe even forever, before she finally managed to get herself under control again, and she did feel bad. She'd promised Faith that she wouldn't laugh and she hadn't just broken her promise, she'd obliterated it.

"Faith…I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have laughed, but…Hahaha…God, it's just so perfect, you know?"

She finally dared to let her eyes meet Faith's, and she was relieved to see that she wasn't mad, not in the slightest.

"Guess I can wipe my ass with the paper your word's printed on."

"I know, I'm sorry. So…'Winters'?"

"Yeah, is that fucked up or what?"

"Apparently we were made for each other."

"'Sides you breakin' promises left and right, think we're good to go."

Buffy kissed each of her dimples.

"Even though I can't keep a promise, will you still marry me?"

"Nothin' anywhere that can stop me."

Buffy pushed her back down on the bed again, and hovered just inches above.

"I love you, Faith Winters."

"And I love you, Buffy Summers."

They both began laughing.

"See why I didn't wanna tell ya, B?"

"We do sound kind of sappy together."

"Coulda been worse. Met a 'Winterbottom' once."

"'Faith Winterbottom and Buffy Summertop'."

Their laughter quickly turned into something else and they made out for a long time, teasing each other into a frenzy and then pulling back to let things simmer.

"Hey, B?"

"Uh-huh?"

"I really wanna marry you."

"You do?"

"More than anything I've ever wanted…well, 'cept for you."

Buffy smiled and snuggled into Faith's chest.

"I so like that answer better than the first one."

"I'm really sorry about that. What an asshole I am."

Buffy's head snapped up:

"You are not!"

"Yeah, sometimes I kinda am."

"Maybe a little, but you're my asshole…Wait…"

"Not even gonna go there."

Buffy began placing tiny little kisses all along Faith's neck and jaw, her hands sliding under Faith's shirt to leisurely play with the hardness she found waiting there. Faith's hands were busy too, slipping underneath Buffy's clothing as she enticingly stroked the soft, warm skin of her back all the way down into the waistband of her jeans.

"So when we gonna do this wedding thing, B?"

"How does two months sound?"

"Like way too long."

Buffy sat up quickly:

"But that's the bare minimum! Will and I planned it all out and there's just no way we can do it any sooner, not if we're going to have…"

Faith pulled her back down on top of her.

"Whoa, it's cool! I'll wait forever if I gotta. Just want you to be happy, so take your time and do it just like you always dreamed about."

"Really?"

"Really, B. Do it up right."

Buffy sat up again, this time all excited and girly.

"I've got it all figured out! I know you'll want Angel to give you away, and of course Cordy will be your…I just can't decide where we should have the ceremony. Should it be in a church or someplace outside?"

"Anywhere works for me."

Buffy knew instantly.

"Hey, you've got an idea, I can tell. What is it?"

"Nothin', B. This is your thing, and I'm fine no matter how it shakes out. Long as I end up hitched to you for the rest of eternity, I'm gonna be doin' pretty damn good."

Buffy got that look she always got when she was going to be annoying, and Faith braced herself for what was coming.

"Let's hear it, Ms. Win…ters."

"B…"

"Spill it, Ms. Win…ters."

"Christ, how long's this gonna go for?"

"A conservative estimate would put it at right about forever."

"Terrific."

Buffy was waiting, so Faith just said it:

"It's kinda weird. For most people, it'd be depressing as hell."

"Since we're not 'most people', I'm liking it already. Where?"

"Was thinkin' maybe we could do it at your mom's grave. We'd have to do it at night 'cause of Soulboy and Junior, and Red would have to make us invisible or somethin' so nobody tries to…Fuck, I know. Crazy ass, stupid idea…Who the hell's ever heard of a wedding in a cemetery at night? Forget I said any…"

And then Buffy was all over her.

"You are the sweetest, most wonderful person in the history of the world. I love that idea, it's perfect!"

Then the teasing touches started up again, and Faith was getting happier and happier. The evening was finally heading back to where it had been heading when they were downstairs, all back on track, just like it was supposed to be. But Faith was still paying close attention, no more drifting for her tonight.

Buffy was the best kisser in the world, and Faith smelled something that kept driving her wild every time she inhaled. What was it?  It was definitely Buffy, but there was something different mixed in with the usual. It smelled like…like oranges, and it was so damn sexy and…

"…which was Will's idea. What do you think?"

"Me?"

"Yeah, it's up to you. Which one?"

"……B?"

"Uh-huh?"

"I definitely, no question, really, really wanna marry you, okay?"

Buffy was puzzled for a second, but then she got it.

"You weren't listening again."

"I honest to God wanted to, but you were kissing me and then I started smelling this smell. It's so hot on you, and I kinda zoned out 'cause you smell so good and I'm holding you. I can't help it B, you're you, and throw in that sexy new perfume, what else am I s'posed to do?"

"I guess I should feel flattered."

"Wish ya would. Be a lot better than hangin' around while ya crush my windpipe."

Buffy kissed her throat.

"Don't worry, no more 'windpipe crushing'. I'm sorry about that."

"Think I had it comin'."

"Even if you did, I still shouldn't have done that."

Faith's hands went to Buffy's ass, pulling her as close as she could get her.

"Maybe we oughta concentrate on somethin' together.''

"Must everything lead to sex with you?"

"When you're involved? Yeah, it must."

"Mmm…more flattery. I like it."

Faith rolled over quickly, placing herself on top.

"So, what's the new perfume?"

"I spilled orange juice all over me when you kept ringing the doorbell like a maniac."

"Oh. Well, ya oughta bottle and sell it."

"Does it turn you on?"

"No, you do."

Faith was trying to get their clothes off without ripping them, but it wasn't going very well. First she tore her own shirt off, then Buffy's bra met the same fate.

Buffy just laughed, which was a huge relief because Faith knew it was her favorite. Truth be told, it was Faith's favorite too because its pink color perfectly matched the color of Buffy's…

"Ooh, Ms. Win…ters is all hot and bothered."

Faith ignored her because she was all hot and bothered, and instead she concentrated on getting their pants off. She finally managed and slid back up Buffy's body.

"Jesus B, you feel so good."

"I know how you can make it up to me."

"Huh?"

"You know…for not listening before."

"Already covered that with the 'name' thing."

"No, we didn't."

"Yeah, we did. Asked ya a coupla times, and that's what you picked."

"But F, that was just a trick."

Faith looked at her like she couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"A 'trick'?"

"Yep, a clever ruse to get what I wanted."

"So what, B? Think you can just break promises, laugh when ya swear ya won't, and now welsh on a deal?"

"Yes."

Buffy had her "pouting face" going, and if Faith had any doubt left that she was completely "Buffy whipped", it evaporated when she spoke her next words.

"Alright, what's it gonna take to make it up to ya?"

"Remember why you weren't listening in the first place?"

"Yeah."

Buffy smiled at her all sexy and all Buffy.

"Well…we're up here."

"We sure are."

"So if you start with the 'doing', maybe we'll call it even."

"Really?"

"Of course, I'd have to be allowed to be a pillow queen for quite some time."

"Sure, that's only fair."

Faith began slowly kissing her way down Buffy's body, never breaking eye contact.

"And I'd have to feel extremely satisfied…several times."

"Think I'm wicked fine with this kinda welshin'."

"I thought you might be."

"Thought right, just like always."

"That because I know you, Ms. Win…ters."

"Knock it off, B."

"Make me."

 "I'm glad I kept asking until I got the right answer."

"Me too, B."

"And so far, I'd say it's all going pretty good."

"Got no complaints here."

"How did we ever get so lucky, Faith?"

"Fuck if I know."

They kissed gently at first, but just like always, it intensified quickly and Faith began laughing.

"What's so funny?"

"Just thinkin' about the first time I laid eyes on you."

Buffy rested her head in her hand as she reclined on her side, her other hand tracing lightly along Faith's body.

"It was quite a moment."

"Felt you somewhere in 'The Bronze', but couldn't pinpoint ya. Knew if I took a vamp outside, you'd tag right along."

"I thought you were a damsel in distress."

They both laughed at the thought.

"Just couldn't wait to show off for the big shot Slayer. Had heard all these stories about ya, and I was gonna dazzle you with my wicked fighting skills."

"And dazzle you did."

"Lost my stake right 'fore you got there, not my best start ever. No clue how I was gonna dust the guy, just knew I had to look good doin' it."

"Well again with the 'dazzle', because you looked fantastic."

Faith's smile was nothing but cocky:

"Hell yeah I did, what else ya expect?"

Buffy's finger traced in the suddenly deep grooves of Faith's dimples.

"Silly me."

"So anyways, you finally show, I get a look, and I just know it."

"What?"

"That one way or the other, I was fucked. Was s'posed to be rockin' your world in that alley, but it was me who got nailed, and I knew it right then."

Buffy smiled, her hand drawing delicate patterns on Faith's skin:

"I was so shocked when I saw you, and it wasn't the 'Slayer' thing either. It was just you."

"Meanwhile, was doin' my best not to look like I didn't know which end was up. 'Member I did that wicked intro in the middle of the fight?"

"Which I thought was the coolest thing ever."

"Only happened 'cause when I saw you, I forgot for a sec what I was doin'. Anyways, so I beat the crap outta the vamp all smooth and shit, but then I had a problem."

"No stake."

"Least of it, B. My legs were all wobbly. Needed to sit my ass down quick and find somethin' else to look at 'sides your amazing, drop dead, beautiful eyes."

Buffy smiled as she kissed Faith's shoulder, then snuggled in.

"But you seemed so casual."

"Years of practice. Grabbed your stake, dusted that fucker, and headed inside knowin' everything had changed for me forever."

"When you gave me my stake back, you called me 'B'."

"Just slipped out. Swear to ya B, I knew right then you were always gonna be a part of me. Didn't know if it was gonna play out good or bad, but I knew I was done for."

"And you were absolutely right."

"Felt like lightning blasted me. Had all this energy, all this excitement buzzin' through me, and it felt like I'd finally found home."

Buffy swung over on top of her.

"You did, for both of us. I love you, Faith."

"Know ya do, and it still seems like the biggest fucking miracle ever. Can't always get my head around it."

"Really? Hmm…maybe I can help you with that."

"Yeah? Whatcha got in mind?"

Buffy pinned her to the bed:

"I'd rather show than tell."

"Well okay, if you're sure I'm gonna like it."

"Oh, I can guarantee that."

"Hey, B?"

"Uh-huh?"

Faith's face was so full of emotion, and it made Buffy's heart stop, just like always.

"No way's anybody ever loved anything as much as I love you."

"I know that, Faith, like I've never known anything else."

"B?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For bein' you."

Faith just made her melt, but Buffy tried to keep it on the lighter side.

"Well, being 'Buffy' kind of comes naturally to me."

"Know it does. That's what makes you so amazing."

Buffy felt a couple of tears escape, and she bent down quickly to kiss Faith.

"You're pretty amazing yourself."

"Well, fuck yeah, I'm wicked cool!"

"Yes, you are. Now that that's all been taken care of, could we stop talking and start…"

"Screwin'?"

"I was going to go with 'making love', but I guess you've got the idea."

"Got me a shitload of ideas, Slayer."

Buffy tightened her grip and nipped Faith's bottom lip.

"That's 'Mrs. Slayer' to you."

"What? Think you're the boss here?"

"I am on top."

Faith slipped out her grasp and quickly rolled them over.

"Looks like I'm in charge now, B."

"Looks can be deceiving."

"Maybe, but not this time."

"Really?"

"Sorry Blondie, gotta teach ya a little lesson."

Buffy lifted her head until their lips were almost touching:

"F?"

"B?"

"Don't make me get rough."

"Scary! Got me shakin' in my boots."

"It's so sad how you never learn."

The cocky look was back, and Faith actually smirked at her.

"Sorry baby, but you ain't movin'. I got a real grip here, not some candy ass hold like you had. You're stayin' put 'til I decide different."

"Oh, really?"

"Yeah, 'really'. Go ahead, give it your best shot."

Buffy smiled and leaned slightly to the side, whispering into Faith's ear:

"Please? For me."

"…That's not fair. Fuck!"

Faith rolled them over, letting Buffy back on top.

"You should know after all this time – when it comes to you, I never play fair."

"Yeah, you're a big fuckin' cheater."

"True, but I'm also a big fuckin' winner, and when the prize is you, I do whatever I have to."

"Guess it's kinda cool when I think about it."

Buffy nestled in between Faith's legs, their bodies matching as if they were made for each other.

"Okay then, now will you please shut up and let me screw you?"

"Sure like to see somebody try and stop you."

"Over my dead body…and I mean the kind that stays dead."

Faith grinned:

"They're gonna have to come through me first, and I'm not too reasonable when it comes to you."

"You know, I think I've noticed that before."

Buffy's tongue was teasing, journeying everywhere except where Faith most wanted it to go.

"Even though you're a mean little tease…"

She yelped as Buffy bit down, but it didn't shut her up.

"…I get why anybody'd want ya. Problem is, you're all mine, and I'm never gonna share. Feel bad for'em, but fuck'em."

"You are so sweet…"

"Aw c'mon, B. Still got me a rep."

"Yes, I know. Okay…You are the toughest, baddest, sexiest, coolest Slayer ever…"

Buffy kissed her until they were both crazy with lust.

"…and you're all mine."

"Can live with that. Fact is, gonna have to insist on it."

"Insist away, Mrs. Slayer. I won't stop you."

"When it comes to you B, nobody's ever stoppin' me."

"Promise?"

"Got my word on it."

Buffy's smile seemed to light up the room:

"And that works just fine for me."

"Yeah?"

"Oh, yeah. Nothing's ever worked better."

Faith grinned, her happiness radiating from her.

"Wicked cool, B."

"It's five by five, F. Now shhh...we're busy."

And two voices mingled into one as the night traveled on.

The End